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Newspaper Page Text
mother will want Bomelhfng to say
about how it shall be furnished.
I wonder if it is wicked to wish
that Dick and I were not going to live
in the same city with his people?
(To Be Continued Tomorrow.)
Zg e if
When I visited a friend in his office,
old chap, he was busy dictating a let
ter to a man with whom he apparent
ly had neglected to maintain cor
respondence. The epistle he dictated
was as- follows:
"Dear old peg: Allow me to crawl
on my face with apologies for not
spilling you a little chatter before
this. Have been busier than a banjo
in a spook cabinet; otherwise would
have dipped a gallon of fountain pen
sap long ago. Hoping you are all to
the marmalade, I shall hang the cur
tains on this long chapter of bull.
Yours on hot insteps, Jim Jones."
THE LATEST STYLES )
By Margaret Mason.
Myrtle has a peg top skirt
Slit up to her knee,
Made of flimsy crepe de chine;
Thin as it can be.
Neck and shoes are very low;
You can plainly see
Her'silk hose are very sheer
Myrt a white fox collar has
On her velvet coat,
But it's only in the back;
White bare is her throat.
Myrtle has the rheumatiz
In her dimpled knee;
Quinsy in her lily throat;
Myrtle has a hacking cough,
And heriose is red.
She has influenza, too.
Stuffy is her head.
Through her fever-blistered lips
Still she gayly smiles;
For she knows she's all dressed up
In the latest styles.
- o o
"What do you mean, sir," said an
angry man in a crowd, "by sticking
replied the cheerful offender, "you're
mistaken, I assure you!" "Mistaken!"
roared the Injured man. "Do you
mean to say that I don't know when
my eye is hurt? Why, sir, I saw you
do it! How can I be mistaken?" "I
assure you that you are, neverthe
less," was the reply. "You may know
when your eye is hurt, but you don't
know my umbrella. This isn't mine
I borrowed It!"
Wonder if Aquila H. Dulaney is
mad or happy. Jailed at St. Louis for
forgery, he woke up to find his wife
in the next cell for bigamy. What
is the natural emotion when one is
stopped in the gentle and genteel
business of forgery, to find that the
only wife of ong's bosom has been,
meanwhile, marrying another man.
k-.. - -i