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Newspaper Page Text
DAILY COMMENT ON
How'd you like to pay $12,000,000
tax? But then maybe John D.
At last we've found out why wo
men slit their skirts. Southern
preacher says they do so's they can
kneel in prayer without ripping some
thing. Those skunk raisers in Missouri
shouldn't have to live in fear of sheep
stealers or chicken thieves, anyhow.
"Bride of a week says husband
is innocent," says headline. Wait till
she's a wife of ten weeks!
The queen bee lays 200 eggs a day.
Oh, for such a hen!
Haven't heard of any of the big
express companies out of business
since new cut rates went into effect.
Miss Rana Douglass, Maine girl,
aged 23, is going to outdo that
Massachusetts artist. She will enter
the woods naked and without food
and issue forth, two months hence,
clad and in good health.
Kind relatives will guard against
intrusion upon her on the part of re
porters, photographers, lawyers, mer
chants, doctors, society men, non
society men, married men, single men
and so forth.
Anyhow, her relatives say she'll be
guarded against intrusion.
It is emphatically denied that Wm.
Rockefeller is regaining his voice,
which he suddenly lost while quizzed
by Pujd congressional committee a
Maybe silence is golden for him.
It makes a fellow feel good when
some long-haired highbrow gets up
and says: "It's dangerous to get rich
Think oi the dangers you're escap
ing. The whole race of American people
will be crazy in 400 years, a profes
Four hundred? About 40, if this
tango dance and white slave drama
An Indiana cow is reported to have
PEOPLE AND THINGS
broken into a greenhouse and de
voured four dozen carnations and
now gives milk that tastes like highly-spiced
That's SOME cow tale.
If you can't, cut down the high
cost of living, cut down the cost of
dying, seems to be the motto of the
new Society of Prevention of Extrav
agant Funeral display organized in
Rebating on railroads never ex
isted, or has been abandoned long
ago, say officials.
And there the Hocking Valley has
just been fined $62,000 for that offense.
A PLAY ON WORDS
"The manager objects to your do
ing so much high kickin'." 15
"I don't care," said Millie Millicent
"I shall continue to exercise my