Search America's historic newspaper pages from 1789-1943 or use the U.S. Newspaper Directory to find information about American newspapers published between 1690-present. Chronicling America is sponsored jointly by the
National Endowment for the Humanities and the Library of Congress. external link Learn more
Image provided by: University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL
Newspaper Page Text
s 7 x 1
WHY Doh'T You )
, .SHOOT? Vot You DINKIN&
The gentleman "with the red, red
Lnose got aboard the car, which, by
some mischance, had stopped for a
The silence was intense.
- The little boy looked at the man
'With the nose. '
And the little boy didn't ask his
"Merciful Heaven!" muttered the
"fond parent. "I am -the father of a
' IN THE AIR
A parent's life is one long respon
sibility. It's a wonder that so many
of the genus discharge their duties
so acceptably. A writer has discover
ed another parental problem; or per
haps he merely calls attention to one
which many fathers have discovered
"How's the family?" one inquired
of a happily married West Sider yes
terday. "Well, my children are at a difficult
"Difficult! Why, they've all passed
the measles and teething stage, have
"Long ago. But you don't know a
father's troubles. My children are at
the age when, if I use slang, my wife
says I'm setting a bad example, and
if I speak correctly the kids think I'm
a back number. Which would you
5 "You look diseruntled." said
"Yes," snapped the hatter. "Had
Jittle rush just now, and a couple of
prospective customers wanted out
without being waited on."'' '
"They seldom get away from me,"
declared ,the shoe man. "I take off
Jheir shoes as soon as they come in."
"You ought to have seen Mr. Mar
shall when he called upon Dolly the
other night," remarked Johnny to his
sister's young man, who was taking
tea with the family. "I tell you he
looked fine sitting there alongside of
her with his arm "
"Johnny!" gasped his sister, her
face the color of a boiled lobster.
"Well, so lie did," persisted John
ny. ie naa ms arm
"John! screamed his mother fran
"Why," whined the boy, "I was "
. "John!" said his father sternly,
"leave the room."
And Johnny left, crying as he went,
"I was only going to say that he had
his army clothes on." Top-Notch.
Grocer What do you mean by
sending me only 12 ounces of steas
when I send for a pound?
Butcher Oh, I don't know; but
I'll tell you what I did. I lost my
pound weight, and so used one of
.jour pound, packets of tea instead;