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The day book. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917, April 14, 1914, NOON EDITION, Image 17

Image and text provided by University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL

Persistent link: https://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn83045487/1914-04-14/ed-1/seq-17/

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AND SHE KEPT ON ,
"Aunt Chloe, do you think you are
Christian?" asked a preacher of
Ian old negro woman who was smok
ing a pipe.
"Yes, brudder, I 'spects I is."
f'Do you know there is a passage
in the Scriptures that declares that
nothing unclean shall inherit the
kingdom of heaven?"
"Yes, I'se Ijeard it"
"Well, you smoke, and there is
nothing so unclean as the breath of
a smoker. So what do you say to
that?"
f "Well, when I go dere, I 'spects to
leave my breff behind me.
o o
A RUSHING BUSINESS
,,, VVCll, OiXlU. LUC uuaiiicbs manager
& i i.to the new salesman, "how manv or-
i( I ders did you get yesterday?"
"I got two orders in one place."
,. "That's the stuff! What were
they?"
. "One was- to get out and the other
was to stay out."
Qj0y
c
iMg '
GRBflCT SUMS'.- J- R3Rot
MY CONSERVATORY!
' s
new york a perfectly good church,
wedding- come awful near being spil
ed by a mean guy over in brooklyn
a cuppel of days ago
the brides old man owns a coal
yard and a string of ice houses, he
gets them coming and going, and has
the long green stacked awa in bales
with the bridegroom it's different,
the income tax don't worry that boy
none, but his board bill had been
bothering him a lot
however, he is there with the good
looks and the soft pedal chin music,
and as the coal merchant's dauter is
28 and about as good-lookin as a fire
swept shoe factory, the rest was easy
the church was full of society and
uther people, and the minister was
doing his best to earn his 20 dollers,
and everything was going along fine
until the bridegroom had to repeat
after the minister, with all my world-
Jy goods i thee endow
he hadent no more than got the.
words out of his mouth when a guy r
that he owed money to chirped right '
out
there goes 2 suits of clothes, a plug
hat and a toothbrush
well, they finished up the cere
mony, but the snickerin was sum
thing dredful, beleave me
o o
A BOY'S WISDOM
A little Brooklyn boy when told
"You can't have your cake and eat it,
too," asked: "Well, who does have it
if I don't?"
A SHEDDETT
''Confound it! Ever since the cook
bought that second-hand fur coat wa
have been on a hair diet." Fun,
r $lrtitffrii,'.-a-?i-
..ofctf JVtf -4 '-! -i TfeJSV$iLi!-fcss,i

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