Search America's historic newspaper pages from 1789-1922 or use the U.S. Newspaper Directory to find information about American newspapers published between 1690-present. Chronicling America is sponsored jointly by the
National Endowment for the Humanities and the Library of Congress. external link Learn more
Image provided by: University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL
Newspaper Page Text
W'ly-' " Jvyfeyfiy '
B &iE HIM TIME ,VRiEMDs7 "
I ewe HIM TIME.
- A teacher was questioning a class
"of boys on the subject of "birds."
Having received correct answers to
the questions about feathers, bill, feet
and wings, he put the question,
"What is it a bird can do that I am
unable to do?"
"Fly" was the answer he hoped to
get. For several moments the boys
thought, but gave no answer. At last
one held up his hand.
g "Well, my lad, what is it?"
r ".uay an egg, sir." &
UNt bfcl IfcK
"My work," remarked the bald-
leaded dentist, "is so painless that
y patients often fall asleep in the
air while I am operating."
"Huh, that's nothing," retorted
s rival. "My patients nearly all
insist on having their pictures taken
while I am at work in order to catch
.the expression of delight on their
new york a man i know that has
moved up into the bronnix thinks he
must have picked a kind of a bad
a cuppel of mornings after he had
settled down in his new home he was
going by a house on his way to work
when a kid in the yard throwed a rock
and copped him on the bean
after he had picked up his hat, and
felt of his head to see if it was caved
in or only dented up a little, he hol
ered at the kid
see here, yung feller, ime too busy
to attend to you now, but when i
come home tonite, ime going to see
your ma about this
all rite, hollers the kid, you kin do
as you please, but you ought to see
what my old man done to a guy that
came to see ma a few nites ago
JUST A REMINDER
"Yes," said Brown, "I have a won
derful dog. Only this morning, when
I came down to breakfast, after a
sleepless night, and forgot to give him
his usual tit-bit, he went out into the
garden, pulled up a bunch of flowers
and laid them at my feet"
"And what were they?" inquired
"Forget - me - nots," answered
Brown, as he hurriedly left the room,
HAD THE ADVANTAGE
"Why do you insist upon having
the biggest share of the pudding,
Harry?" asked the mother of a small
boy. "Isn't your older brother en
titled to it?"
"No, he isn't," replied the little fel
low. "He was eating pudding two
years before I was born."