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Newspaper Page Text
I n m u-- n? 'ffwi "Mjunew york' fat men has certainly I got their trubbles evryboddy is lafnng at a bif feller that lives up on Washington hites jHe is a deacon in the church and a oiflser in the y. m. c, a. and he would no more touch a-drop of licker than he would set flre'fo an orfin asylum well, he noticed he was all the time tting bigger around the equator", so i went to his dock and he asked e dock hew 60 get rid of some of his urplus Petter take a long walk very day J " Jrr 8a , v -haa th h f !,. Jrafter a taxicab 'now -iso the next afternoon he knocked "Off work early and got off the subway Vi1!!? ,nsi W3. RKWKI 1 WUUkO O ftSPV or FfiUOW - DEV , tvrsL v&o "fo be &" SWEETHEARTS", f rmj sawmm v.) M r about 3 miles from Tils houe and started to walk home gee, the poor guy, the petered out when he had gone about 2nfles, and he set down on a bench in a little park to -rest when he tried to get up and tear off another lap, he was all In, he couldn't even git up off the bench he got part wy up a cuppel of times, then he would flop back just then a little girl came along and she watched him a, few minutes, and then she says, I'M help you up, mister ' . why, he says, you are too little, my child Oh no ; ain't, .says the child, i have helped my pa up lots of times when ie wqs a great deal drunker than what you are he busted outlaffing, as tired as he when he got home he told the storey, and now whenever any of his friends see him setting down, they say hello, bill, drunk agejn? HIS STUDIES "I am inclined to suspect the so briety of the last student in our class." "Why'so?" "When I asked him what were his favorite-studies in ornithojogy, he re plied,. 'Swallows, bats and larks. " r Magazine of Fun. 0 0 BORROWED TROUBLE "Bliggins is a terrible man to TiunE trouble." ''What Is worrying him now?" -"He 'is worrying about-the Income tax he will have to pay If he ever gefg an income big enough to be taxed." Springfield Republican. HER KINDNESS "N "Is shcgood to the children?" "Very. She lets them do everything 1 their father doesn't want them to do." Detroit Free Press, Ml