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title: 'The Day book. (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917, April 28, 1914, NOON EDITION, Image 17',
meta: 'News about Chronicling America - RSS Feed',
Image provided by: University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL
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The bored youth turned tor his din-
tner partner with a yawn.
Whq is that Btrange-looklng man
over there who .stares at me so
much?" he drawled.
5 "Oh, that's" 'Professor Jenkins,"
rshe replied, "the famous expert on
WHY HE WAS ANGRY
First Motorist (after very narrow
shave) But why all, this fuss? We
haven't damaged you. You can't sue
e Second Motorist I know, I can't,
fair. I know I can't; that'sjust my
jjpoint. ' -
We really ought to have a chap
eron," she said, as they went out in
to the garden..
- "Oh, we won't need one, -I assure
you," he replied.
"Oh, won't we? Well, then, what's
Mhe use of going?" N. Y. World.
iTfcb dpi? samp i-it eerr aio
IP TT' " "w t .
S'gffT TO BHJY Him HE'S
TALK THAT COUNTS
"Deed Ah wasn't abusin' dat mule,
jedge," the old man demurred
"Did you not "strike it repeatedly'
with a club?"
"And do you not know- that you
can accomplish more with animals
by speaking to them?"
"Yassah; but dis critter am dift'nt.
He am so deef he caint heah me when -Ah
speaks to him in de usual way, so
Ah has to communicate wid him in de
o o '
BREAKING THE MONOTONY f
Stranger (Jn HickvQle) Life in
this burg must be kind of monoton
ous, isn't it?
Hotel Keeper Used to be a little
that way, but two weeks ago the
manager of our theater started to
change the pictures twice a week!
"Charles seems to be very exact
ing," said a fond mamma to the dear
girl who was dressing for the wed
ding. "Never mind, mamma," said she,
sweetly. "They are his last wishes."
THE DRAMA '
"Good show at the Frivolity now,4
said the New York man to his coun
try cousin. "Want to go?"
"Dunno. Is it clinical or sociologi
cal?" Washington Herald.
o o ' !
SOURCES OF INFORMATION
First Clubwoman She has a per
fect knowledge-of how. the other half
Second tJlubwoman Gossip or so-
ciologist? Magazine of Fun.
o o J
THE CRAB "
The crab is largely legs and claws;
You catch "him when you go fishin',
I hold him in esteem because
Of his retiring disposition. " i
Samuel Hopkins Adama