Search America's historic newspaper pages from 1836-1922 or use the U.S. Newspaper Directory to find information about American newspapers published between 1690-present. Chronicling America is sponsored jointly by the
National Endowment for the Humanities and the Library of Congress. external link Learn more
Image provided by: University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL
Newspaper Page Text
. L C -DaH RY VU, BUT AWT )
'' & J W3r MAKB. He v
A STINQlNfG TEST
mere was as old clergyman who
resgnsd bis huroh In order to be-
e the ohaplaui at a jail. The stood
LoW (man began his farewell sermon
o l' namhkmers in this wise:
y friends, I am leaving you be
caifee you do not love the ebureh.
wijeh you attend vary Irregularly.
leaving you oeoauee you do not
one another thwe hate been
marriages among yoa during the
three year, And. I am leaving
because you do set Jove me, for
contribute very little to uiy sup-
My text ymi mil una m tne
eeatfe abapter, second verse, of
John: 1 go to prepare a plaoe
An Irishman walked into a hotel
nd noticed two men 4ghng at the
na of the room. umnm$ over the
;, be earnestly inquired of the ba
eader. "Is that a private flght or can
anyone get into ttZ'iet
- WftONC EV5RY TIME
Practically eveiy adult person in
the village had flocked to the Httte tin
hall to hear the speaker from Lon
don "go for the government."
The villages eat open-mouthed as
the orator proceeded to strip the vfcrt
ub ministers, 4)ne by one and eel
lectively, of every vestige of hoajty
or purity of purpose. '
'That ain't trUer sk!" said one okl
fellpw at last.
The, by thkr time, furious orator
ignored the interruption, and pro
ceeded wildly in his flew attack
"Nor that's not true, either!" askin
protested the aged ehampkro a Jlw
minutes later. The speaker paufeed
"I can well be&eve that my frJmd
finds it hard to credit the baseness; of
these jacks-in-oftce," he beHowtd,
"But let him wait I There Is wese
to follow! lamjuptgQlngtodisoftee
some facts concerning them that wffl
make every hair on hie head stftnd
up with horror!"
"Well, that ain't true, either!" -0id
the-old fellow, "laJa'tgotabajr on
THE T, M. & W.
A drummer asked a grouchy Ms$rs
vijle man, who was perhaps too dnmk
to. see our gtigerh aMto truck, the way
to get to Mount Owret,
" "Take the T. M. W.," replied the
citizen of the Mason metropolis,
"What's tfcai7" queried the eager
"Two mules and a wagon," was le
laconic answer, Mt. Olivet (fcy.)
We edttor W suddenk Internet-.
sl by th oce boy, who remark:
"Tkewfc a tramp, at tlie door, Mr.
Hyde, ad he says he ain't had noth
m' to eat for six days."
"FetohJdw in," said the editor. "K
we can And out how he does it,. w
can rw the paper for another week,"