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! ' SAM'S DIAMOND
Sam, the odd job "man, returned
home frpdj, the city with 'a Scarf pier
that comaiaeia "diampndof no us
ual size. Itwathesprideof hisheart
and. the-, envy of his village compan
ions. Jfe treated all inquiries from
them, as to its value. and4ts authen
ticity with high scora..--
His.employer, after a.3week-of bask
ing in Its radiance, asked Sam about
itshisiory., - ,'.
"Sam,;" he said, "iaJtra real dia
mond?" I'Well' said, Sam, "if it ain't, I've
beeni4one out o75 cents."
y -o o f-
j. HIS LAST SMILE
The missionary retired to the spe
cial hut the tribe had prepared for
him, where he was shdrtly.afterwards
joined by a "native. "The- king has
sentiite to dress you for dinner," said
the man. i'Ah?" smiled the mission
ary. "IJow thoughtful 6f him. You
are the royal valet, I suppose?" "No,"
replied the native, ."I'm the royal
coqk."
' ( TANK;You,N.
Qofiiffiji
nev york sumtimes apergon goes
out looking for encuridgement, and
gets sum kind they aint looking for
like a yung lady i know who made
a cal a few mornings ago upon a
promerient theatrical manidger
this here mariidger he had had" a
kind of ,a bad season and he wasn't
feeling exacktly gay
2 or 3 of the shows that went rong
on- him looked like they might of got
over if the ackters hadn't been sutch
a cheesy bunch
byt they sure Was a feerful lot of
hamsj and they spiled what chanst
the plays ever had to make good
'well, just as the manidger was
thinking it all over, the yung lady
come, in all decked out m a pancake
hat and a sweet smile
fgood morning, sir, she says, i am
representing a movement to start a
home for disabled ackters, and i want
to .ask if you -won't do soinething
for us
you bet your life i will, says the
manidger, you start the home and i
will disable the ackters
"IT PAYS TO," ETC
They were discussing the power of
the advertisement. '"It's marvelous,"
said one member, "I know a young
actress who mislaid a string of pearls.
She inserted a 'lost and found' adver
tisement, and the next day I asked
her:
" 'Well, did you get your- pearls
back?'
" 'Yes,' she answered, 'and isn't ad
vertising wonderful? The string Host
were only imitation, but those that
have been returned to me afe th
real thing.' "
