Search America's historic newspaper pages from 1789-1924 or use the U.S. Newspaper Directory to find information about American newspapers published between 1690-present. Chronicling America is sponsored jointly by the
National Endowment for the Humanities and the Library of Congress. external link Learn more
Image provided by: University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL
Newspaper Page Text
K-T-yOH Z S0T,30 STRIKE IT
V ' UW 6rt ME. A uatvr r
A SALINE "SOLUTION"
.. The mother of a St Joseph, Mo.,
tot gave her a nickel and said:
- "Run down to the grocery and get
-me five cents' -worth of loose salt"
At the store she proudly gave the
"order, but was told by the proprietor
that he was entirely out of loose salt
Determined not to go home empty
handed, the wee customer replied:
7 "Well. then. Ill take a nickel's
""worth of the tight" St Louis Re
. o o
' THE PARTING
"The great men are all dead," she
said with evident regret
- "But the beautiful women are
not," he replied, looking earnestly at
r "Of course," she added, after a
.moment's reflection, "I always ex
cept present company."
"So do I," he said.
Then she asked him if he would be
good enough to conduct her to her
"Send someone up to Room 77 at
once," came the voice of old Mrs.
Moneybags to the night clerk's desk.
"I trust you are not ill, madam?"
"I soon shall be if something is
not done!" replied the old lady, in
Hurriedly, the manager went to
"Now, listen!" said the wrathful
lady. "That noise overhead has
been going on for the last two hours,
and has nearly driven me mad."
"I cannot understand it, madam,"
answered the clerk, listening curi
ously to the bumps and bangs over
head. "The gentleman in that room
is ill." ,
Upstairs, he inquired the cause of
the disturbance. The -occupier of the
room was a Frenchman.
"It ees the medicine, m'sieur," he
explained. "The doctor did say,
'Take two nights running, then skip
a night' M'sieur, pardon, but I was
doing the skip!"
DONT BLAME HIM
"Your garden doesn't look very
promising this year," said the neigh
bor; "what's the matter?"
"Well," said the wife, "every time
my husband got to digging in it he
found a lot of worms, and they al
ways reminded him of his fishing
THE MUSICAL ART
Mother What do you think you
will make out of my daughter's tal
Professor (absent - mindedly)
About a dollar a lesson, if the piano
THE NATURAL METHOD
'1 am learning to spell" said Har
old, upon his return from school.
"Can you spell bread?" asked
"Not yet" answered Harold. "Try
me on a piece ofnie." ,
, , i i ir niThmiiii' ..