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Newspaper Page Text
I'llMUl '','.' I ' U 'J.
i twchshuwd' ss QXAcn't-Y--N
Di Vt5T -- yT BADGER. DOS.'
ACH -. W 3 V REGULAR
.': 1 rJiH
When a certain darkey of Mobile,
Ala., announced his 'engagement to
the dusky one of his choice the con
gratulations that were showered up
on him included a note of wonder.
"Joe," said one of these friends, "I
shore is surprised' We-all never
thought you'd speak up. It's going
on two years since you begun to fool
around Miss Violet."
"Dat's true," said Joe, "but de fact
is, old man, I didn't lose my job until
last night" Judge.
NOT TO BE TRUSTED-
"Coffee and rolls, my girl."
One of those iron-heavy, quarter-inch-thick
mugs of coffee was push
ed over the counter. The fastidious
person seemed dazed. He loked un
der the mug and over it
"But where is the saucer?" he in
quired. "We don't give no saucers here.
If we did some low-brow'd come pilin
in an' drink out of his saucer, an'
we'd lose a lot of our swellest trade."
HE LQOKED WORRIED
"Henry," said she, "you look very
pale. "What's the trouble?"
"I .was, stung to the quick by an,
adder this afternoon."
"Heaven! How did it happen?"
"Why, I dropped in at the -bank
and the bookkeeper told me my ac
count was overdrawn." N. Y. World
"Willie," said the teacher, "give me
three proofs that the world is actual
"Yes'm," said Willie cheerfully;
"the book says so, you say so, and
ma says so."
Easymark ve loaned so much
money to my friends that I am al
Owens Let me make the finish
"Bobby, I suppose you say yaur
prayers every night"
"And what are the things you pray
"Mostly that pop won't find out
what I've been doin' through the
The visiting lady had kept her hos
tess at the open door fully half an
hour saying good-bye. Finally an
arate masculine voice indoors called
T)ut: "Say, Maria, if you're going
out, go; if you're staying, stay; but
for heaven's sake, don't ooze out"
A FAMILY JAR
"I suppose you know I came near
marrying Jim Wombat before I mar
'Tes; I know it," sais the goaded
husband. "He rubs it into me every
time he gets a chance."