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Newspaper Page Text
1 1 flD IKE TO SEeN
' C 5ETbO. CANIT .
: - - - oome" s
TWO OF A KIND.
First Stenog How do you like
.your new boss?
Second Stenog Great; He don't
.know no more about grammar, spell
in' an' punctuation than I do; he's
jest out 'er collegel
c Little Willie How did you get the
Ved marks on your nose, Uncle Dai?
i1 TTnr.lfc Dai frlaRses- mv hnv
I Little Willie Glasses of what, Un
t WOMAN'S WAY.
"Why don't you ask your hus
''I intend to, my dear, just as soon
as I make up my mind what 111 do."
Amelia Is your husband domes-
Marie No, French. Judge.
k Oantain Lawson was owner and
I pilot of the packet New Orleans, ply
ing tne Mississippi Drone Damu.
There were miles of rushing waters.
Only an experienced eye could tell the
channel. Captain Lawson had been
at the wheel for 36 hours. He was
exhausted from loss of sleep. Ras
tus, a colored pilot aboard, was called
to the captain.
"Do you see that north star?"
asked the captain.
"Well, hold the boat on that star."
When the captain awoke an hour
later his boat was winding in and out
among the trees. The captain was
indignant. "I thought I told you to
hold this boat on the north star!" he
"Lor", boss, we's done passed dat
star long ergo." National Monthly.
A DIPLOMATIC REBUKE
A well-knkown western senator re
cently visited a barber shop where
the barber, failing to recognize his
patron, was very talkative.
He ventured on all the timely top
ics of the day, and although the sen
ator did not apparently enter into
the spirit of the conversation very
keenly, the tonsorial artist's enthu
siasm was not vividly dampened.
Finally he asked :
"Have you ever been in here be
fore." "Once," said the senator.
"Strange that I don't recall your
"Notat all," the Senator assured.
"It altered greatly in healing." Har
, ANR'HE DID.
Her Father Young man, young
man, would you take my daughter
from me? You don't know a father's
feelings at such a time! I must sup
Her Lover Oh, that's all right! If
you want to give three cheers, go
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