Search America's historic newspaper pages from 1836-1922 or use the U.S. Newspaper Directory to find information about American newspapers published between 1690-present. Chronicling America is sponsored jointly by the
National Endowment for the Humanities and the Library of Congress. external link Learn more
Image provided by: University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL
Newspaper Page Text
The little, mild, bald man had set
tled down in the train to read, and,
feeling drowsy after a trying day at
business, fell asleep. On the hat
rack above was a ferocious crab in
a basket, and reaching the edge of
the rack, it fell, alighting on the lit
tle man's shoulder, and grabbed his
ear to steady itself.
' All of the passengers waited ex
pectantly for developments, but all
they heard was:
"Let go, Sarah! I tell you I've been
at the office all the evening."
WAS TO BLAME
Complainant Your worship, she
struck me in the face with her
clenched fist. That cut was caused
rby her ring.
Magistrate Where did she get the
Complainant I gave it to her.
"was our engagement ring.
Magistrate The prisoner is dis
charged. That is clearly a case of
Mil - ., ,
''Say lady dit vooX
iUER. TRY WPEftlMfi A
JftO&to. UXT YOUR. J L ,
CANCELLED J3EFEWUE J &KL '
I was speaking with your father
last night," he said at last, somewhat
"Oh, were you?" answered 'the
sweet young thing, lowering her
eyes. "Er what were you er
"About the war in Europe. Your
father said that he hoped the fight
ing would soon be over."
The sweet young thing smiled.
"Yes," she remarked; "I know he's
very much opposed to long engage
ments." HE ANSWERED
"Walter Jones," said a teacher
sternly, "you are not attending to the
lesson. Did you hear Jessie Smith's
description of 'Hominy'?"
"Yes'm," replied the small boy.
"All right, then. Give me a sen
tence in which you bring in the word
To which the answer was: 'Hom
iny marbles have you "
f o o
HAD A PAST
Drunk I plead bein' a bit drunk,
Magistrate Prisoner known to the
Constable Ryan Indade he is, Bor;
he's been here foive toimes for bein
robbed and twoice for bein' assaulted
WHY SHE ASKED
Chaperon Was that young man
who called on you last night an
Tess Why so?
Chaperon He talked like one. He
put up that "going" bluff for half an
hour. Wisconsin Sphinx.
Whilst we were down town last
eve we went to the movies and
bought a bar of popcorn. Darn it,
some night we will go crazy and buy
"irae chocolate creams I--Tacoma
v. . -vw 2: "" k h-f