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Newspaper Page Text
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-J'JlK:iacT, I MARVEL AT YSUR CHSTZRUKE
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, The officer was calling the names
and prompt replies came from Jones
and Smith and Robinson.
The next name was Montaig that
was how the officer pronounced it.
There was no reply.
"Montaig," repeated the officer
"Here, sir," -came the half-hearted
reply from the rear rank.
"Why didn't you answer at once?"
said the man in charge.
"My name is Montague," said the
"Is it?" replied the officer. "Well,
you do seven days' fatigew."
The class had taken up the sub-
font nf thA -nilAro nf fho wnrlil Tho
H president of the United States, the
iking of England and their powers and
functions had been discussed.
Suddenly the teacher said: "Now,
Willie, what's a kaiser?"
"A kaiser," replied the absent
minded Willie, whose strong point
was geography instead of political
-history, ("ls a stream of .hot water
Bpringin' up and disturbing the
ANOTHER WAR HORROR
The success of the little subma-
" rines against floating dreadnaugbts
i proves the modern theory: "You've
& Sf got to get under, get out and get un
Itider." N. Y. Mail.
"Its going to be a war to the
knife," declared the suburbanite who
was feeding his chickens.
"What now?" asked the friend.
"Why, Binks sent me a box of
axle grease and advised me to use it
on my lawn mower."
""Well, I sent it back and told him
to use it on his daughter's voice."
He When I was a boy I was once
thrashed for telling the truth.
She That cured you, I suppose.
FAILS TER SHINE
IN SOCIETY f