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Newspaper Page Text
R ,, " A NARROW ESCAPE ""
-ljet me out 01 una Duuaing;- ex
ilaimed the book, agent
"What's your hurry?" inquired the
f "Don't try to get me into conver-
f'sation. I used to think that sign, "No
.'solicitors allowed in this building,
was a slight- But if s a blessing and
a safeguard. Tm. a book agent, but I
don't want to do any more business
"Haven't you sold anything?"
TNot a" volume and I came pret
ty near buying 500 shares of min
ing stock." Washington Star.
Country House Host (to arriving
guest) Elo, Jack! Drove over with
Miss Cuddles, eh? Hipping sleighing,
but cold going, ain't it?
Jack (cheerfully)-Oh, didn't, no
Host All right, then. Come in
and thaw that earring out of youi
If- 1 r- i
Iff tiM Vl
NICE FOR HANGING
"I am going over to comfort Mrs.
Brown," said Mrs. Jackson to her
daughter Mary. "Mr. Brown hanged
himself in their attic last night."
"G, mother, dont go; you know
you always say the wrong thing."
"Yes, Tm going, Mary, m just talk
about the weather; that's a safe
Mrs. Jackson went on her visit of
"We've had rainy weather lately,
haven't we, Mrs. Brown?"
"Yes," replied the widow. "I
haven't been able to get my week's
"Oh," said Mrs. Jackson. "I
shouldn't tlrfnfc you'd have any
trouble. You have such a nice attic
for hanging things in." Top Notch.
The dentist had just moved into a
place previously occupied by a baker,
when a friend called.
"Pardon me a moment," said the
dentist, "while I dig off those enamel
letters of 'Bakeshop' from the front
"Why not merely dig off the TJ' and
let it go at that?" suggested the
The man of great financial prom
inence had' met with an accident
"Well have to probe," said the doc
tor. Just at that moment the man re
covere consciousness and exclaimed:
"If it's a surgical operation go
ahead, but if It's another investiga
tion, give me an anaesthetic."' N. Y.
"Boots by Smith, costumes by Rib-
inson, wigs by Jones, scenery by
Dingbat" mumbled the man in the
"What-are you driving-at2
'Tm trying to dig up who wrote the"
play." Louisville Courier-Journal.