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Newspaper Page Text
f, varlDol i Ask ,
( - QSCAR. TO Wk ME
BEFORE HE FINDS
, ocrril J
A tourist la Scotland, cam to a'
wide ferry. It was stormy and the
wind was constantly increasing. The
Scotch ferryman agreed to take the
tourist across, but told "Mm to wait
until he had first taken a cow-across.
When he had Teturned and started
across with thetraveler, the latter be
"Wm you tell me why you Cook the
cow ovr and made me wait?" he
"Weel now," explained the ferry.
txnan, "ye-Bee, Ahe coo wur valuable,
and i reared tn wind wud increase so
th"boat micht upset on th' second
trip." Philadelphia Record.
PROGRESS SINCE THEN
Lady Why, you naughty boy. I
Inever heard such language since the
gday I was born.
Small Boy Yes, mum; I s'poee.
ere wuz a eood deal of cussin' de
day you wm bora. , i
THE LAZIEST, ALL RIGHT
A farmer had 20 employes on his
farm and as none of them was as
energetic as the farmer thought he
should be, he hit upan a plan which
he believed would cure them of their
"Men," he said one morning, "I
have a nice, easy job for the laziest
man on the farm. Will the laziest
Instantly 19 of the men stepped
"Why don't you step to the front
with the rest?" inquired the fanner of
the remaining one.
"Too much trouble," came the re
ply. Philadelphia Record.
"Did you ask little Jimmy Wom
bat aboat the fight over at his home
the other night?"
"And what did you get out of
r "Not very much. His mother is
evidently an exceedingly strict cen
it umvsr raven .... .
L0T5 OF RRlD
FE1LERS RH 0EY fln
TELL E ORTMffRRlPD
LIFE TBBCHES Ffljf?
DAT ITS A wattre af
TIME TRYIN TER ARGUE
WIO A WOMAN