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ONE MAN'S OPINIONS
BY N. D.-COCHRAN
Horsed and Humans. A horse is
worth more money in the market
than a human being. According to
the latest horse, census we have about
as many horses as humans 100,
. 0,00,000. We have the largest sup
' ply in the world, next to Russia. So
far we have exported only about 75,
000 for the war; and it is estimated
the war will Hse up 25,000,000 horses.
Horses are, valuable. When one
dies it costs money to buy another.
When a working man dies it costs
nothing to get another. Plenty of
them are walking the streets looking
for jobs. All an employer has to do
Is to pick up one on the street or
phone to an employment bureau.
Because of the large number of
horses the war will use up the gov
ernment is urging farmers to breed
their mares to blooded stallions. The
European governments are forehand
ed, too. They have been urging
their women to get married to sol
diers and breed before the soldier
stallions' go to war. That is because
there will be a shortage of humans
in Europe when, the slaughter is over.
The kings and other nonproducing
aristocrats will need workers to do
their menial work for them to farm
the land, raise food and manufacture
articles they will need, Including
clothing.
Horses don't have to think. A bit
is placed, in their mouths auiLthey go
where they are driven. They don't
have to worry, either. They don't
walk, the streets looking for work
or for f oodv or a placel) sleep. They
don't eyen have to get married.
Everything is attended to for them.
Humane societies are organized to
see that their masters don't treat
them with cruelty.-
It is different with humans. But
this is argreat country It is called
the land of the frfee an dthe home of
the brave. Horses don't know this.
They can't talk. They don't under
stand our human language. They
don't read. It Isn't necessary igv
them to think, They are only horses.
We are humans. 3
Horsey don't vote, either. Thean
are not citizens. They are merejjbr
horses. nod
short15nes o
We remain in doubt as to whet
an epidemic of smallpox struck,!
Arizona legislature or whether an em-
demic of legislature hit the smallpox
When other wars broke out we pjrjfeh
sume Germany compelled the Krupjjft.
to stop selling cannon to the bellig
erents. Of CQurse! t 9fl
One Chicago mayoralty candidate
tried sending candy to women votei&t
His manager sent box of "gum dr$s
to a woman who thinks no one knows
her teeth, are false. He'll lose tfiat
precinct sure. t . nos x
vWe're strong fdr the apyrtrophifc
who advocate a diet of sawdus&PftP
they win enough converts we can-lMy
wheat and beef cheap. ,ino
o o -39V9
WAR NEWS as&
E2i J J3"iAv
"Hi Nubbin ain't been around latftrf
ly.hasfce?'' .,
"No; his- wife beat him up withuw
flatiron and he can't get out." afejj
"Do tell! And what is the latesfi
'communique from him?" mk