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Newspaper Page Text
THAT'S WHAT IT IS, ANYHOW
"How is Welsh rarebit pronounced?" Subscriber.
Now. Subscriber, what's the use of tryin' to put a fool question like
that up to us?
We always try to be-accommodatin', but when you come at us on our
blind side we're likely to shy. We ain't no Welshman and we don't claim
to be no Noah Webster.
We guess, Subscriber, that you have got outside of just as many of the
devilish things, at the hour when all respecterble people are in bed, as we
have and there ain't no use tryin' to lay no trap for us. You might be the
next door 'neighbor to our wife, for all we" know.
Howsoever, we aim to answer all the questions put to us, some haw
or 'nother, so, Subscriber, we'll go to the length o' sayin' that if you try
one of those rarebit or rabbit things about 1 a. m. tomorrow and wake up
something like two hours later, when the cheese is a runnin' a dead heat
with the beer at a mile a mutate gait inside your anatomy, you will more
than likely pronounce it a la Sherman on war.
o o t '
THE ONLY CHANCE
"Hurry, George, or we will be late
to the picture show."
"Oh, we don't want to get there be
fore it starts."
"Yes, we do, too if we don't I
can't see what the other women are
The rural lad emerged from the
woods one day and was walking
along the road when he saw an au
tomobile for the first time. The thing
didn't look natural to him and he
started down the middle of the road
at a speed that made" the automobile
burn gasoline to keep hfrh in sight.
"Won't do no thin' o the kind!" de
fiantly called back the native.
"What's that?" indignantly cried
the chauffeur, still working the
horn. "Do you mean to tell me you
won't get out of the road?"
"That's jes' what I. said!" cried the
speeding native. "Ye want ter get
me over in that plowed ground where
ye kin ketch me!" Philadelphia Tel
egraph. o o
Lord lieutenant of Ireland receives
annual salary of $100,000.
THOSE ACTOR FOLK DONNEDARTLING
GARB FOR THEIR GAY MIDNIGHT PARTY
Most of the stars who now gleam
on the stagein Chicago held a little
mignight party the other day for the
benefit of .the actors' fund.
It was to be a costume affair.
"Well, if there are to be some cos
tumes there, why not make ours
SOME costume?" meditated Dorothy
Dickson and Carl-Heisen, the famous
And they did, much'to the amaze
ment of the dthers preseat. The
above picture shows the striking garb
in which the two dancers enlivened
the doings of the evening.
Others of the guests were Blanche
3e-ii. -r j ..-i iaAi.