SSSWWSBHBHH '9pifimmmm ' THERE'S A LAUGH AND A TEAR IN THIS PARTICULAR COURT In the court of domestic relations, which has been called the court of domestic revelations, the queer twists of humanity reveal themselves by turning tragedy into comedy and a laugh follows every te"ar. Anton Kovolsky and his wife were very sad. It was Anton's first arrest and the first time his wife had to ap pear against him in a court . And then the story unfolded. An ton had expressed his determination to go out one night. Friend wife said he couldn't go. He said he would. She locked him in their bedroom and then went to sleep and while she was asleep Anton jumped from the second-story window, landed unhurt and didn't go home again. Mrs. Kovalsky awoke in due course of time and missed Anton. She hunted for him in the closet, under the bed, etc., and then, discovering the windpw open, looked for his re mains in the street. They said they would kiss and make up, but as the wife left the court she; said to Judge Sabath: "And I'll put bars on that window." John Grzybowske, 1509 Elston av., was a chivalrous soul. And he had a talkative lawyer. Mrs. John was a frail thing with a black bruise on her chin. It was a mark of affection from John. "Tell the court what led to that blow," said the lawyer. John told. Mrs. John had said something uncomplimentary about his mother. No real man lets a woman say uncomplimentary things "about his mother. John figured it out for a week then he gave his wife a punch in the jaw. "Your honor,' 'said the lawyer, "this woman causes this man to strike her by buzzing around all the time. You can realize that she would drive a man to such an action by her buzzing. Listen to her buzzing now." "Too bad she hasn't a brother big ger than John," said the judge. "He might buzz for her," salct State's Att'y O'Reilly. John was ordered to pay his wife $8 a week. Martin Bane said his wife drove him to drink. Mrs. Martin had red hair and snapping blue eyes. She said Martin didn't work. He said he did the best he could. The judge told hi mto take any kind of a job even if he only got $10 a week. "Judge," said Martin, "she spends all her time in her mother's rooming house. If I took a $10 job she'd stand at the front door and yell through the 30 rooms: 'Here comes my $10 man.' " Mrs. Peter Carlson also had red hair and Peter called her a "white hope." He said she wasn't quite as clever as Jess WHlard, but she was mighty fine in landing her punohes, just the same, and sometimes she varied the punches with lighted lamps. "That isn't true," said Mrs. Carl son. "He blackened my eye a few days ago. You can see, it ain't faded out yet.1' "I didn't," said Peter. "She got fussing and bumped her eye against my head." Peter was put on probation. o o ' GUARDS SPOILED THE SHOW New York. "I'm going on next," announced a pajamaed and bath robed young man on the back stage at Miner's theater. Then the guards came and removed the escaped one to the bughouse. o o A COUPLE OF "FOOLS" Washington. Maj. Pullman, Wash ington's new police chief, says all street accidents originate with the "automobile fool" and the "pedes trian fool." THEY ALL FELL FOR IT Akron, O. Police are looking for a. rujbber goods salesman who adver tised for nervy girls to learn aviation. He sold fifty of them rubberaviation suits at $60 each, and disappeared. L m 2mkmMvurl'7!M'ymmummmmmmtmmm f j,- - ., L-.? fc j. ta. m tUmi<&ttib