Search America's historic newspaper pages from 1836-1922 or use the U.S. Newspaper Directory to find information about American newspapers published between 1690-present. Chronicling America is sponsored jointly by the
National Endowment for the Humanities and the Library of Congress. external link Learn more
Image provided by: University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL
Newspaper Page Text
"You have no idea how provoking
my dressmaker is, dear. She's a per
"Makes you wait, eh?"
"No, not that, dear she expects
"Why do you refer to that man's
fortune as tainted money?" asked
the Old Fogy.
"He made it operating a skunk
farm," replied the Grouch. Cincin
The teacher was holding up a pic
ture of a zebra.
"Now, children, what is this?"
"It looks to me like a horse in a
bathing suit," answered little Arthur.
"Why won't you marry me?"
"My good friend," responded the
young lady, "you couldn't even sup
port my dog in the style to which he
has been accustomed."
THEY WERE NOT ALIKE
After suffering a long time with
toothache the young colored girl got
up her courage enough to go to the
dentist. The moment he touched the
tooth she began to scream.
"Look here," he said, "you mustn't
yell like that. Don't you know I'm,
a 'painless dentist'?"
"Well, mebber yo' is painless, sah,"
she said, "but Ah isn't." Ladies'
SUPPLY CUT OFF
Weary Walker No, mum, I ain't
dirty from choice. I'm bound by
honor. Yer see I once wrote a tes
timonial for a soapmaker and prom
ised to use no other.
Madam Well, why don't you use
Weary Walker Because, jnum,
the firm failed about five years ago.
B'GOLLY I'VE GOT
ABOUT RS MUCH
RESPECT FER TH '
FELLER DAT HARPS
ON THE SAME STRING
ALL TH'"HME AS I
tjFWE FR THE
FELLER DHT GRAPH
OPHONES ON ONE
RECORD OR PIANOLAS
CONTINUALLY ON TH'
CQMF Dm i ' -O
Vnur-t troTl I l'v"
t m'mmJmimTm m4 HMMB