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Newspaper Page Text
nKl pw, W"Vl WW'S " r- T V" j-V-Jfr-v
Hope rr iss
7 WtHHABrTABLS.. J
"You are charged with stealing
chickens; do you want a lawyer?"
"No, yer honah."
' "Why not?"
"If it please de co't, I'd like ter
keep dem chickens myself after hav
vin all de irubble er gettin' 'em."
N. Y. World.
HE WAS THE MUSIC
"Hello, old man. What's the mat
ter with your foot?"
"We had a dance at our hcSise last
night, and I sprained my ankle play
ing the pianola." N. Y. World.
Alice Trust her! You surely don't
think she could keep a secret?
Marie Well, I've trusted her with
other things and she kept them.
"I proposed to my stenographer "
"Don't get excitel. I only proposed
she should be assister to me." New
'WHERE SAYINGS COUNT
His wife delights in the use of fig
ures of speech. She expresses
pleasure over a book with: "It was
like a sunbeam stealing into my
souL" A musical treat, if the melody
is soft and sweet, she descnbes a3
"peaches and cream."
But her husband recently has be
come suspicious of her figures of
speech. He has discovered that when
the music is "peaches and cream"
she immediately proceeds to the
kitchen to get something to eat A
few evenings ago, when he had play
ed a particularly pleasing number on
the piano, she commended it by say
ing that "it had the quality of pure
gold." Then she struck him for
money for a new spring suit
Now, every time he sits down to
the piano, he is afraid to play any
thing with speed and volume for fear
she will interpret it as "the delight
ful rush of a motor car." .
w DIFFERENCE B"
-TWEEN LFI.BOR UNION
MEN HND BASE BALL
PLAYERS IS THflT
THE LRTTER, AFTER
MAKING R STRIKE,
KEEP ON WORKING-,
T h )