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Newspaper Page Text
'HURRAH. ! fFQOD ) Mi J
Goliath was thrown quite off his
guard when David stipulated for a
battle in the twentieth century style.
"Oh, very well!" assented the Phil
istine, with a sneer of disdain.
So they went forth and began to
.dig trenches. But by the time Go
liath had sunk himself to his knees
David was out of sight.
"David wins!" cried the military
critics, unanimously. Puck.
"Who's that impressive-looking
woman over there?"
'"That's Mrs. Peckum.. She's a re
markably strong-minded woman, and
"they do ,say ihat she commands a'
very large salary."
"How does she earn it?"
"She doesn't earn it Her hus
band earns it, and she commands it"
"You know that story about Esau
and his pottage?"
. "Yes." ,
"Didn't he make a mess of it?"
Ilocky Mountain News.
I ' asTT-yiT 1
n. y. sum fellers will have their
reveng even if they have to wate-un-til
the last minit befour they kick the
bucket and mr higgens was one like
that i gess if what the lawyer said
about him is true
this lawyer was called for ta an-
swer a hurry-up call to make a last
will and testament for a man named
mr Higgens who was dying and had
only a few minits to live
furst mr higgens says to the law
yer i herely bequeeth all my propurty
to my beloved wife, have you got
and the lawyer guy replies i have
then add on condition that my dear
beloved marries again inside of a year
that made the lawyer feller sit up
and take notice & when he gets over
the shock he inkwires
why do you want your wife to mar
ry so soon, can it be that you love
her so well that you dont want her to
go threw life alone and unprotected?
no, says the sick man, that aint it
eczactly, i want sumbody to be sorry
i died, that all
but, says the lawyer when he got
threw telling the story, why should
he pick on sum perfect stranger to
him and make him sorry mrs Higgens
furst husband died
nobody knew why
HAVEN'T GOT THAT
"Is your husband troubled with in
somnia, Mrs. Nurich?"
"No, indeed. He doesn't sleep very
well, but otherwise his health -is per-fect"--Buffalo