Search America's historic newspaper pages from 1789-1922 or use the U.S. Newspaper Directory to find information about American newspapers published between 1690-present. Chronicling America is sponsored jointly by the
National Endowment for the Humanities and the Library of Congress. external link Learn more
Image provided by: University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL
Newspaper Page Text
WJ!'.fHiMSWiJUi' i UJJW'illiipipii;i.W"p'vt;gv,w"'?"",,l"' '"a."1 mJii(wiwv .u m
RIGHT ON THE JOB
Zealous Sentry Afraid I can't let
you go by without the password, sir.
Irate Officer But, confound you! I
tell you I have forgotten it You
know me well enough. I'm Major
Sentry Can't help it, sir; must
have the password.
Voice from the Guard Tent Oh,
don't stand arguing all night, Bill,
shoot 'im. London Tatler.
AIN'T yow )
V Yct? )
j FRIVOLOUS REMARK
A number of clergymen were dis
cussing the character of a venerable
woman whom they esteemed to be,
wise in her generation, but a young
man who was present said it struck
him that she showed great lack of
wisdom In one respect
"What is that, pray?" inquired an
"Why," said the young man, "she
always puts out her tubs to catch
soft water when it i5 raining hard."
And silence fell upon the assembly.
MORE THAN ENOUGH
1 Modest Suitor I have only $5,000
a year, sir; but I think I can support
your daughter on that
Father (enthusiastically) Sup
port her, my boy. Why, you can sup
port her entire family on it Milwau
"Now, can anyone tell me what
lesson the parable of the Ten Virgins
"Please, miss, that everybody
should get married,"
CHANGED HER PLAN
Wife Don't you think you might
manage to keep house alone for a.
week, while I go on a visit?
Husband I guess so; yes, of
WJfe--But won't you be lonely anJ
Husband Not a bit
Wife Huh! Then I won't go. .
T heard youse got fired. Wuznt
youse a success?"
"Sure. I wuz a success at what I
"Well, what wuz youse doin'?"