OCR Interpretation


The day book. (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917, May 12, 1915, NOON EDITION, Image 17

Image and text provided by University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL

Persistent link: http://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn83045487/1915-05-12/ed-1/seq-17/

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VS VANT3 TO SIT
r v. by voi
SAGE ADVICE
Tarn going to make a speech "that
will make my friends sit up."
"You're on the wrong track," rej
plied the experienced campaigner.
"See if you can't make one that will
cause the other fellows to lie down."
Washington Star.
o o
OUT OF A JOB
"I used to be "well off before the
war started."
"Poor man! Is that so? And what
was your business?"
"I was a lecturer for international
peace." Detroit Free Press.
MEDICAL RUMOR.
BoyPa, was Job a doctor?
Father Not that I know of.
Boy They why do people have so
much to say about the patients of
Job? l
o o
PROVES IT
"How's that dude getting along
who wanted to be a cowboy? Is he
a fighter?"
"Must be a fighter. He still wears
his monocle." Kansas City Journal.
ON DEBATABLE GROUND
"I'm green in society. Would it be
all right to shake hands with yonder
distinguished-looking individual?"
"I'm green myself. But I'd advise
you to go a trifle slow."
"Pshaw! No man can make a se
rious mistake by being a trifle friend
ly." "Yes, he can, too. Thatmay be
the butler." Louisville Courier
JournaL o o
NOT GUILTY
"Who killed Cock Robin?'
the coroner.
"Not I," said the Sparrow. ''I
haven't had my auto for nearly a
week."
asked
CRY OF "AUTHOR!"
She Who said one man was as
good as another? Some Socialist, I
suppose?
He No. Some old maid.
o o
BELOW THE ARMOR BELT
"My, my, why so much grief?,
What's the matter, sonny?"
"Aw, me an' me brudder wuz play
in' war an' he torpedoed me food
cargo."
t-m-n. -a -v m - .- t c'jr-J-JVu'gijri

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