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title: 'The Day book. (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917, June 24, 1915, LAST EDITION, Image 17',
meta: 'News about Chronicling America - RSS Feed',
Image provided by: University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL
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FROM VAUDEVILLE "
Bert Swor, black-face comedian
Burglars have been around our neigh
borhood. I was speaking to my wife
' the other night and she told me that
the bathtub was gone. I asked her
how long it had been gone, and she
,v said several weeks. I never missed it
if until today. I know positively that
saw it tnere last August.
TMP A ourgiar Dusrea into our piace
i,Hv" aSain last week. Sam was asking me
"Did he get anything?" says he.
& "I should say he did," I told liim.
V "He's in the hospital now. My wife
thought it was me coming home."
, u u
If Wealthy Benefactress to Hospital
lt. INLLTbO iiu nmguuiui VVC11, WO 11
njp bring the car tomorrow and take
?some of your soldier patients for a
drive. And, by the way, nurse, you
might pick out some with bandages
that show the last party might not
Viavo hopn wniinrtprJ at nil ns far a a
anybody in the streets could see.
V? She Isnt Jack just wonderful?
: v He's already been promoted to field
He From private to field marshal
two months? Impossible!
She Did I say field marshal? Well,
perhaps it's court martial. I know it
is one or the other Passing Show.
Miss Yellowleaf I frankly admit I
am looking for a husband.'
Mrs. Guzzler So am L
Miss Yellowleaf But I thought
you had one?
Mrs. Guzzler So I have and I
spend most of my time looking for
Customer I tell you frankly that
I cannot pay for this suit until next
Tailor All right, sir.
Customer When will it be fin
ished? Tailor Next year, sir!
AS SOLDIERS BOLD, WE SLEP,
NO BLANKETS TO WRAP US
ROUND AN" POUND"
(BUT THISIL BE TOO LONG
A STOCY )
WE DECIDED TO COVER
OURSELVES WITH GLORYr-
Doctor From now you may let
your husband have a glass of beer a
day. You understand?
Wife Yes, doctor; just one glass a
Doctor (a week later) Now, I
hope you have kept strictly to that
one glass per day that I allowed your
husband to take?
Wife Most decidedly, doctor
only he is four weeks in advance with
Payton Bennett is organizing a
regiment of English butlers.
Parker Why butlers?
Payton To scare the enemy to
..--J. .- . i.- .Ajtjunaal