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Newspaper Page Text
n. y. rthey was having a peech of a
.peech of a argiment about what the
united states cood do agin any furrin
nation that wanted to lick ns in frunt
of andy horgan's grocery store last
nite neer our house
1 guy was telling what the ger
mans cood do if they brought there
army over and marched them cleer
across the country.
then the 3d feller hopped in with
a mouthfull about what the english
navy cood do to us if the come over
and bombarded n. y.
this lad hollers so much about the
english navy that the 1st guy gets
, sore and he says, o the germans have
(got a gun that will knock a man's
eye out 10 miles off
f & then another man who had been
I keeping his trap shut tite steps in and
hands em this hot 1
I o you guys make me fired, what
do we kare for your navy and 10
tmile guns for i herd the other day
that mr tomas edison has invented a
new gun for the Amerikan army
which is the best littel ol'cannot that
ever spits red hot cannon balls
I whats that your saying, both of the
.other lads heller quick together, what
fe can this gun do that is so remarck
iBble well with this new gun all we got
to do is to get the address of the man
and boom he's dead, just that quick.
Jitney Driver Why do you call
'your house in the suburbs "Tippe
rary"? Sububs Because-it's such a long
jry out there.
-'The druggist won
"Look here," shouted the excited
man to the town druggist, "you gave
me morphine Instead of quinine this
"Is that so?" replied the druggist.
"Then you owe me 25 cents more."
Ladies' Home Journal
READY TO GRASP
The Pair One I Buppose you will
marry, though, when the golden op
portunity offers, won't you?
The Cautious One It will depefnd
upon how much gold there is in the.
"My face is my fortunte,'' said tha
"And it's counterfeit at that," mut
tered the young man who had ob
served that the blush was perman-
ent N. Y. World. ,
' SERVANTS' A&: BESTTbR
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