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Newspaper Page Text
; MERELY COMMENT .
That Eastland.relief fund evidently
looks like a Juicy morsel to the shy
Wonder who invented "lawyers,
And what is the open season for
lawyers in Chicago? I admit I'm not
well up on the game laws.
Is it legal to kill lawyers in winter
Chicago seems to be safe again.'
Bill Thompson has found his hat the
one that was lost
But no man need ever worry about
losing a hat so long as h doesn't lose
what he wears under it.
That was a patriotic speech Bill
made about the negroes.
This is no country for discrimina
tion against a man because of his
color or religion.
Be we do It, Just the. same.
By'the way, Isn't it funny that the
only land In the loop thatydecreases
in value right along is that which be
longs to the public schools?,
' Robbing the school children ap
pears to be a popular loop pastime.
That's one thing I like about a dic
tionary when I'm looking for hon
esty I know where to find it
Why didn't the trust newspapers
send their gunmen to Camp Sher
idan? I'm still neutral so I refuse to lend
that billion dollars to Prance and
I couldn't consistently lend that
mucji to the allies witho'iit lending
another billion to the kaiser,
So I'm going to sit tight and keep
those two billion myself.
But I think the allies overlooked a
bet when they forgot to send Admiral
Beatty and Maldwin Dsommond over
for the billion. .
They might have gotten ft in Chi
cago. . MeBbe Og Armour will' forgive the'
cops if they get the jewels, even if. the
gentlemanly robbere escape.'
t Some of our most prominent rob-,
bers, .however, must "be disgusted. i
with those Armour robbers. Such,
pikers! Only-got $3,000. worth. ,
EVERYBODY WANTS TO KNOW,
Miss Annie Hinrichsen, jail Inspect
or for HI. charities commission, wants"
to know why prisoners fn S. Clark st'
station were last night fed black
bread and" dishwashy coffee that
officers admitted ''they would not
She wants to know why prisoners
have to wash their face at Desplairies
st station in a slimy trough that-ii
She wants to lmow why conditions'
are such- that a young man in' a
"Vyoo'dlawn station cell whispered be-;
tween. bars-that he had been prisoner
a week, he didn't know why-and the
police wouldn't let him tell "his rela
tives iie Was beingt held. ' '
LITTLE RUNNER AFTER A NEW
Jole Ray,r the little Illinois A. CV
runner who won the A. A. U mile
championship at the big San Fran
cisco meet, is going" after the -unprecedented
mark of 4 minutes and 10.
seconds in a speed trial today.
The mark Ray is after is two, sec-
onds faster than, the world's record,,
set by Norman Tabor in Boston early
In (Jie stfmmer, and Tabor's time beatr
a record that bad stood fordfityears