wmmomBmmmmmmzmm&fz&mm
WWTE9
A9 EOLLOWP :-
new york. last sundy pop says do
you folks wanta go out to the coun-
try and spend the day with your
I grandpaw, & we all says yes if we
i dont have to go to church which aint
' so nice as staying on the farm &
- playing with the pigs and riding on
th,e horse.
so we all beat it out urley & us kids
- had a peech of a time until noon
when grandpaw and pop and the
- wimmin corned home & they brang
I the preecher along with them for din
i, ner
that was al rite for' they allways
f, have plenty to feed your face with at
fgrandpaw's & 1 fore dont count for
mutch.
i was verry kareful to make no
brakes for i new i wood get Into trub
bel with ma if I did, but pop he open
ed his mouth and neerley swallered
his foot,
I the preecher says to my pop, &
,how did you like my sermon
5 well pop didn't like it too mutch &
.he had been a sleep during most of
It so he tryed to slide away from the
kweshun but the revener asked him
agin
'i i dident have a fare chanct to judge
it, replys pop, for rite in front of me
was old man wilkens and mrs fleener
and doc byers and all the others set
ting there with there mouths open a
drinking in all the best bits of your
sermon befour they gets to me, all I
treceeves was purty poor stuff
c will you pleese pass the chicken,
mrs lorey, the preecher said to my
grandma & he never notised pop, any
more but ma neerly cut the liver out
of him looking daggers
o o
PUTTING IT UP TO FATHER
After several unsuccessful attempts
to draw her husband into conversa
tion at the restaurant the wife dis
covered the cause of his abstraction
to be a beautiful girl 'dressed in black
and seated at a near-by table.
"An attractive widow," observed
the wife coolly.
"Yes, indeed, a very attractive
widow, agreed the husband enthusi
astically. "Yes," sighed the wife. "I wish I
were one." Ladies' Home Journal.
TODAY'S BELLRINGER
Simeon Ford, the famous author
and after dinner speaker, says, in
speaking of the late Jj Pierpont Mor
gan: " We learn from Mr. Morgan's
life that great wealth does not al
ways bring happiness. We know alf
'ready that poverty doesn't always
bring happiness. What on earth,
then, is a chap to do?"
o o
THROUGH WITH HER x
V JrlillP
"When sister got married mother
threw an old shoe after her."
"What fer?"
"Dunno. I guess it means'she aint
goin" t spank her any more."'
4
mssssssssasSti
i