OCR Interpretation


The day book. (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917, January 17, 1916, NOON EDITION, Image 17

Image and text provided by University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL

Persistent link: http://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn83045487/1916-01-17/ed-1/seq-17/

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7' -"""- r
A BIT HOT
INTERVIEWING A HUMORIST
"Good morning, Wagge. What's
on the carpet today?" asked Bingle
ton. "Dust," said Wagge.
"Clever boy! But I man what
have you on foot?"
"Shoes," said Wagge solemnly.
"Oh, come off, Wagge. What are
you up to these days?"
"Date," sighed Wagge.
"I'll give you just one more chance,
you poor Frivol, you. What are you
doing now?"
"Everybody," said Wagge.
"As usual, eh?" said Bingleton, as
he shoved the remains down the near
est available coalhole.
TODAY'S BELLRINGER
Lew Fields, the comedian, who has
now entered moving pictures, tells
of once appearing in an unsuccessful
show many years ago in New York.
"One day, on Broadway, a friend
accosted me," says Mr. Fields. "I un
derstand you are presenting
at Daly's," he said. "You are right,."1
I answered, "I am presenting it free.
to a lot of deadheads."
A WICKED BIVALVE
"That niust have been a very bad
oyster I found that pearl in the other
night," growled Slingsby. "When I
took the pearl to a jeweler he pro
nounced it a poor imitation. I tell
you this is a shoddy age when even
the bivalves try to put it over on us."
o o
CONSOLING
"Was your garden a success last
year?"
"Very much so. My neighbor's
chickens took first prize at the poul
try show."
IT DOES
Pa (rolling up sleeves) There are
a good many methods of punishing
small boys.
Bobbie Yesr pa, but spanking
takes the palm. Chips.
She What a charming husband
Mrs. Longwedde has. So tender
after 10 years of marriage.
f He To be kept in "hot water" 10
years would make an. alligator ten
der r
WILD WEST STUFF
Willie My hobby horse is worth,
more now than when I got it
Bobby How so?
Willie It's broken, an' broken
horses are always worth more, my
pa says
r- . -.
. .- C,

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