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Newspaper Page Text
n. y. last nite ma and pa had a
fuss becaus pop pulled that old
chestnut about the cake ma baked
wasent as good as bis ma used to
bake when he was a littel boy
ma ought to have been used to
that by 'now, but she aint & it made
her sore as a boil for sevral minits
and then she said just wate until we
wimmen get to vote & then we will
show you better guvenment than
anything you or your fathers have
o, yes, i gess so, said pa grabbing
his' hat kwickly, but he didnt have
no more comebacks, so he beet it to
now this A. M. the 1st thing, a guy
from 1 of them suffrage states-
clipped threw the offls gate & chinned
with the boss for a while
i will tell you the best goak what
i herd out in kolerado he said & the
boss said shoot
well this dame was running for of
fis & the nite before the elecshun
she comes home to her husband who
minding the 2 childrun while she was
deerie she say i am all threw with
my leckshuneering now'fc i think i
will be a winner
i hope so, her husbend replyd
but she wasent satisfyd with that
so she'inkwires how do you like the
way i handled my campain
o, verry well, he says, but of korse
it cant compare with the way moth
er used to handle her campains
"I see you have named your new
oil well Matinee GirL"
"Yep. It's a gusher."
HE DIDNT GET THE JOB.
While Mark Hanna was chairman
of the Republican national commit
tee he was much annoyed by one man
who wanted a job as messenger at
the headquarters. After the sixth or
seventh visit Hanna sent for the man
who then held th6 position.
"Did you see that man, just now,
who has been here so many times?"
"Yes sir," said the messenger.
"Do you know what he wants?"
"Well, he wants your job. and if he
gets in to me again he will get it"
Senator Hanna never saw tne ap
plicant again. Ladies' Home Jour
nal. o o
Maloney Shure, a man can git no
peace nowadays, not even in his own
Casey Ain't thot roight! Last win
ter me darter ripped up the parlor
carpet an buttered the floor for dan
fin', an' this year she's swiped all me
socks to make intotocking-caps an'
flooded the kitchen six inches dape
for a skatin' rink. Puck.
'if must ee oumiMe
-AMe-TrieRE viene foop
WHDKeO MBN HERE A
ttiUT& A60 i.
BI C3 AMY KTRSK'
IN A POWOeR FACTORY-