Search America's historic newspaper pages from 1789-1922 or use the U.S. Newspaper Directory to find information about American newspapers published between 1690-present. Chronicling America is sponsored jointly by the
National Endowment for the Humanities and the Library of Congress. external link Learn more
Image provided by: University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL
Newspaper Page Text
The young lady from town was
spending a week-end in the country
and she discoursed glowingly to the
buxom landlady of the rustic inn on
the delight that real country butter
and real new laid eggs gave a jaded
Her faith in country produce was
destined to be rudely snaken, how
ever, for, on coming down to break
fast next morning she was greatly
shocked to overhear the good land
lady say to her spouse:
"The lady from Lunnon's mighty
keen on fresh eggs, John. Run and
get half a dozen from the grocer's
while I go in the yard and cackle."
"Christopher! Did I Bee you rais
ing your hat to our parlor maid?"
"Yes, my dear."
"Well, my dear, if I ignored her
she'd give notice. She's too smart
to be nodded to; and if I winked at
her you'd be annoyed."
LOOKED FORWARD TO
She If I'd known you'd be such a
brute to poor Bldo I'd never have
He The anticipated pleasure of
kicking that miserable little beast
was one of my chief reasons for pro
posing. Stray Stories.
"Does your husband believe in pro
hibition?" "About the same as he does in
ghosts. He admits that there might
be such a thing, and the mention of
it scares him dreadfully.
Restaurant Keeper Resi, go out
and jolly the city chap on the veran
da. He's so bored that he keeps tast
ing the butter and wine, and he might
be a chemist Munich Meggendorf
TwONoeR IP THE j
( WAR HAS ANY1HIN&
-Co DO ItflfH' Mg
gJgiNc. f RueeeR collar
WiSMR IN A LAUNPRV
"Aw," said the Englishman, "it
must be most unpleasant for you
Americans to be governed by persons
whom you wouldn't awsk to dinner."
"No more so," said the American
girl, "than for you to be governed by
persons who wouldn't ask you to din
ner." Harvard Lampoon.
To every man who is too good for
his job there are a hundred whose job
is too good for them.