OCR Interpretation


The day book. (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917, May 22, 1916, NOON EDITION, Image 17

Image and text provided by University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL

Persistent link: http://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn83045487/1916-05-22/ed-1/seq-17/

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THE FOOLISH FABLE OF HAROLD HANGOVER
By Robert Vernon.
Harold Hangover belonged to that
ildtd Galaxy referred to by the
)aUy journals as a Prominent Club
nian. Before he Had been thus des
ignated, he had been Quite a Re
spectable Young feller; paid his gro-
.cery bills and sometimes Remem
bered to tote home a box of bonbons
to The Frau. But after it was no
longer a secret that he was a -P. C,
Harold strove day and night (Mostly
at night)-to Live up tq his Reputa
tion. He got so that he knew every
Bartender in Town by his first name
and had a Cocktail named after him.
Three new Turkish baths began
Busines when Harold struck his
stride. Time- sped on. Harold
mourned because there Were only
Seven Nights in the Week in which
to pursue Ethylated Expeditions, but
he managed to get the Most out of
Life; anyway that's how he alibied
himself. One dark and dreary Night
he encountered a purple rabbit with
orange poker chips sprinkled Hither
and Yon over its Hide. With a Wild
Shriek Harold Disappeared into the
Velvet Black of the Outside Night
and nobody in the Bachelor club
buffet ever Saw him again. After he
had lost his Job and his home and
most of his Old-time Reputation as
a Prominent Clubman, Haroldi crept
home and The Frau strapped him
to the Ostermoor till the Menagerie
departed; "It is Never Too later to
reform," moaned Harold, and he De
clared Himself offen the Stuff for I
life. The sun brightly Shines for the
Hangovers now, and Harold can't
Even standthe sight of a Root Beer
without having palpitation of the
Cardiac Organ. Moral: Never get to
the stage where you call the bartend
ers by their first names.
o o
CAUSE,. AND EFFECT
Little Boy A penn'orth each of
liniment and liquid cement, please.
Chemist Are they both for the
same person or shall 4- wrap them
separately?
Little Boy Well, I dunno. Muv
ver's broke 'er teajot, so she wants
the cement, but fawer wants the lin
iment. 'E's what muwer broke 'er
teapot on. Tit-Bits.
o o
SOFT SNAPS
(wax wetftLftM o- pip v&o
JsriAVe YoOR BREAKFAST?
cKvf iwPE1- Not
eMHN& cauoes oti
PlKSS PEAK dJb"

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