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Newspaper Page Text
N. D. COCHRAN
EDITOR AND PUBLISHER.
500 S. PEORIA ST. CHICAGO. ILL.
Tplpnhnnoi Editorial, Monroe ,363
leiepnones circulation. Monroo 3S3
SUBSCRIPTION By Carrier In Chi
cago. 30 cents a Month. By Mail.
United States and Canada, JI.M a
Entered as second-class matter April
21. 1911, at the postofflce at Chicago.
I III., under the Act of March 3, 1879.
GUNS COMING. Machine guns
for the First cavalry will be bought
with cash supplied by leading Chi
cago citizens. Some of the "greatest"
men we have are joined in a commit
tee to achieve this end. These are
-the Machine Gun Fund Promoters:
J. Ogden Armour, the world great
est butcher and meat merchant
Julius Rosenwald, the world's
greatest mail order merchant.
Samuel Insull, one of the world's
greatest public utility experts and
James A. Patten, the world's
greatest wheat plunger.
Major Rob't Rutherford McCor
mick, publisher of the Chicago Tri
bune, self-styled "the world's great
These are big fellows in all the
sense that "big" means powerful in
the backing of newspapers, banks
In the city of Chicago there's not
much these "big" fellows have per
sonally wished for, but that in the
end they got it
They're wishing for machine guns
And by the law of batting averages
they will get 'em.
LATER: Banker Charley Dawes
was made chief of scouts of Bertie
McCprmick's machine gun expedi
tion to Wall street Scout Dawes
wigwags from sandhills outlying
Wall street that J. P. Morgan & Co.
pds-i-tive-ly can NOT let Bertie havgj
any of those wicked playthings just ?
now. Just now the whole American .
output is needed for shooting holes i
into Prussians, Austrians, Turks and ,
Bulgarians. Later some of these ,
rapid-fire mechanisms may be. avail
able for Chicago boys to puncture
he skins of Mexicans, Yaquiis, Chi-
I huahuans, Costa Ricans and various
I workers in banana fields, on coffee
plantations and in gold and silver ,
i CHIEF HEALEY'S POOR BUT:.
PATRIOTIC. Police Chief Healey
wishes to show his patriotism. And .
he gives a horse, his pet charger i
"Bob," to Capt McEvers of the First
Tax lists show that Chief Healey
schedules himself as a poor man. His ,
poverty goes so far that he writes
zero in the personal property classi
fication. His salary of $8,000 a year is eatea
up by the high cost of living and he .
classes himself with any garment
worker or hod carrier whose per
sonal property totals under $300.
By these very acts the chief. wishes
to proclaim: "I am a patriot and a
very poor man very, very poor,
A WAR-TIME PUZZLE
A company of soldiers dressed in
khaki, with the bandage-like puttees -
about their legs, were waiting for a
train at a station in Wiltshire. .
Among the spectators were an old .
countryman and his wife. ,
"I say, Garge," the old lady whis- ,
pered, "there's somethin' I can't un
derstand about they solgers."
"What be it, lass?" '
"I can't think how they get their
laigs into they twisted trousers."
GEO. W. PERKINS, TAKE NOTICE!
"I believe in preparedness ancl not
in letting George do it." Theodore