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The day book. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917, June 30, 1916, LAST EDITION, Image 26

Image and text provided by University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL

Persistent link: https://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn83045487/1916-06-30/ed-1/seq-26/

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CONFESSIONS OF A WIFE
ANY GIRL AS TOLD TO MARGARET WAVERLY
(CONTINUED)
I sent the chapters I read to. Jim
to Dick yesterday, little book. Today
I am sending these to him:
"1 must have lost consciousness
when I reached my room, Margie,"
said Paula. "I don't know whether
I fell asleep or whether I fainted, but
it was dark when I finally came to
myself. For a few moments I could
not realize what I was doing there
and then at last it all came back to
me. I hastily took off my clothes
and got into a hot bath. Then I put
on a house gown and started for
mother's room.
"I found that Aunt Rachel had dis
charged most of the servants. Only
the cook, two maids and mother's
nurse were in the house.
"Fortunately, when I came out
Aunt Rachel had gone home.
"The cook, who had been with us
for years came to me and said: 'Miss
Paula, I'll do anything for you, but
you must keep that woman out of
my kitchen.'
" T don't think she will come back
often now that I am here, Nora,' I
said.
"The nurse met me at mother's
door. 'She is sleeping,' she said. I
tiptoed in, but she opened her dear
eyes and smiled at me. She even
tried to hold out her arms to me, but
she was too weak.
"I went over to the bed and put my
arms around her.
" 'My poor little girl, my poor lit
tle girl,' she murmured. 'What are
you going to do?'
" 'Don't worry about me, mother
dear. I'm all right All I want is for
you to get well and stay with me.'
" T can't do that, darling,' she said
with, a weary sigh, 'and, dear, if it
were not for you I would be glad to
go. Paula, I know that somewhere
in this city your father is lying dead.'
"I gasped. 'How do you know it?'
'Because this morning just be
fore you came I got a letter from
him. Fortunately your Aunt Rachel
did not see it. The maid brought it
to the nurse and I heard them talk
ing about it and insisted it should be
ent to me. Here it is:
"I opened and read: 'I do not ask
you to forgive me, wife of mine, be
cause I know that you have done it
long ere this. But, oh, I want you
to know that I, who would have
saved you and our little Paula from
every little passing annoyance, sit
here in this little room tonight with
the awful consciousness that I have
brought to you the most terrible
grief that can be borne.
" 'My darling, I am confessing to
you that I am a coward. I am not
man enough to bear the disgrace. I
can't see in the faces of the men
about me contempt where I once ob
served respect.
" 'Yes, dear, I am going to end it
all. That is the only way. By so
doing I will leave you and Paula at
least a comfortable living, if not a
respected name.
" 'Oh, it is hard to go out all alone,'
but I know if I once looked into your
dear face Twould not have the cour
age to do that which I am sure is the
right thing.
" 'Good-by, loved ones! In some
way I feel that you. darling wife, will
follow soon. Forgive me and love
me a little, for whatever my faults,
my sins of omission and commission,
I have always loved you.'
"I was weeping so I could not see
the signature. When I looked up
mother's eyes were closed and when
I picked up her hand to place the let
ter in it it fell back lifeless.
"With a cry I bent forward and the
nurse came hurrying to me.
"She bent down and listened a mo
ment at her heart and then she
looked at me. I raised my eyes and
looked the Question I dared not ask.

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