Search America's historic newspaper pages from 1836-1922 or use the U.S. Newspaper Directory to find information about American newspapers published between 1690-present. Chronicling America is sponsored jointly by the
National Endowment for the Humanities and the Library of Congress. external link Learn more
Image provided by: University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL
Newspaper Page Text
A1NT NATURE WONDERFUL
The Insurance Man.
The insurance man is the bird who
invented the comeback stuff. A cat
has only nine chances but the insur
ance man on the way out meets him
vself coming back. To him a closed
door looks like a dessert and a "This
is my busy day" sign reads "Wel
come." As soon as the insurance man gets
wind a fella has gogfoold of a few
seeds he immediately becomes a
hungry canary howhegets hep to
a fella having some .extra1 cash, Law
son doesn't know.
He comes skidding.into your office
on all fours, unrolls tke parchment
and starts spilling insurance liter
ature that's so interesting, to you a
timetable would read Mk,a serial
story. Even if you've got ftob wrap
ping up feathers he make$$ou think
you're as safe as a fellywalking
around the edge of a skysopfcer with
banana peelings tied on MMlhoes.
You may be bo healthy tau-can eat
tripe and stand ukulele nttnfc, but
when he 'gets through you marvel
how you got through th&Jaat hour
without artificial respiration. Then
he warbles about a fiction family
customer of his whereJtRfeotd man
took out $10,000 moreiwdie two
sons $15,000 more each.y
If hot air was an eyedropper the in
surance man would be a water tank.
Just before he came you were tell
ing the gang what a glorious world
it is and how to live to be a century
plant After he goes you're looking
up headstone catalogs for bargains.
CAUSE FOR FURY
Wilkenspn was near the exploding,
point when his neighbor met him in
"That man Potter," he burst out,
i "has more cheek than anybody I ever
met." , ,
"Why, what has he done?" asked
the neighbor. ,
"He came over to my house last
dog that kept him awake at night"
"Well, what of that?
"What of that?" shouted Wilkin
son. "Jt was my dog."
- o o
Good W6UT1! h
GoSU.TUiS .. - i
h- IS A UA.UO
ttCRVS AL9TTIi TBOM OMAHA-.?
,JH0 WILLED T4E
PC - Hcvj, V.UTEJJ- ,
Tommy Mamma, have goose
beries got legs?
Mamma-'-Of course not, Tommy.
Tommy Then I've swallered &
night and borrowed a gun to Mil a 1