OCR Interpretation


The day book. (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917, February 22, 1917, LAST EDITION, Image 17

Image and text provided by University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL

Persistent link: http://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn83045487/1917-02-22/ed-1/seq-17/

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JrZrui- r i--r-"r -ri"i- "Ti ajf.
AIN'T NATURE WONDERFUL
The Cornet.
The cornet Is a piece of wind wrap
ped up in brass. The fellow that in
vented the cornet must have been
sore at himself. The cornet may
sound pleasing to some people, but
then a toothache is pleasing a week
after it's pulled out
The cornet is a nice looking ar
ticle and so is a peacock, but as yet
there are no peacock solo records on
the phonograph market. We used to
respect the cornet as being a musical
machine, but that was before the
rummy next door to us got one. He
takes lessons via mail order.
It must take a lot of wind to play
the cornet, not overlooking nerve.
Before this goof next door has the
evening meal toothpick half chewed
he's up in his boudoir pushing wind
in the cornet, and when it spills out
the other end it sounds like a couple
of roosters gargling, with an anvil re
posing on a half portion of their
windpipes.
When a fella's got a grouch on
there's two ways of getting even
with himself one is by introducing
gas into his system and the other is
to buy a cornet. Of the two, the lat
ter is sure good-bye. Somebody
might open the door when you've got
the gas turned on or else the meter
may hold out for another two-bit
piece. Play safe take the cornet.
o o
ODD, ISN'T IT?
Delaware. Police followed a trail
of chili sauce from the Champion
grocery, which, was Tobbed, and ar
rested man In his home. He was
charged with stealing several hun
dred dollars' worth of goods.
CHESTNUT CHARLIE
MCE D066l'
J
SPEAVi
NCWf dWWUS TEU. THE FCLU.S VJHY
A PNLM THeF IS LIKE
A CALENDAQJJ
$-
BECAUSE IT BJBMflftl
DATES' 7
fccJANOu-.t 0 J
ST-
.5. OK
SHE WAS HIS
"I wonder why Flubdub always al
ludes to bis wife so unctuously as
'my own'?"
"Well, she is in own. Everything
else about the place he Is acquiriag
on payments."
MiWMWhNiaBM&wiWrfiiNaASi. -M,

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