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The day book. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917, February 24, 1917, LAST EDITION, Image 17

Image and text provided by University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL

Persistent link: https://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn83045487/1917-02-24/ed-1/seq-17/

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AINT NATURE WONDERFUL
The Efficiency Man.
The efficiency man isnt born one.
He's a victim of society. He wants
to be an efficiency man for the same
reason a fella wants to be a hermit
He gets sore at mankind and gets
even with them by becoming an effi
ciency man. He's as popular with the
employes of the company he's effi
ciencing for as the, time clock or
whistle time Monday morning. His
job is to dope out ways to get more
out of the working, guys and save
money for the firm.
In warm weather he gets 'em all
whistling so the firm can cut down
on the electric fan bill. By getting
the bookkeepers, to skip crossing the
t's and dotting the i's in 10 years the
firm will have saved a bottle of ink.
He takes the rubber off the pencils
so the employes can't make mistakes.
He'd even go so far as to get the
office force to let their index finger
nails grow long enough so they can
be trained to take the place of pens.
When a person has to sneeze he'd
have 'em aim it so it wold help
clean up the floor and make less work
for the janitor that night. And he'd
have a meter on the janitor's broom
to register the number of strokes
made, so he could dock him on the
strokes saved by the sneezers.
Employers, hear ye! The best
piece of efficiency shown would be to
get rid of the wet hen efficiency man.
o o
THOROUGHLY KNOWN
"Dobson? I hardly know him!"
"Why, he said that he was thor
oughly acquainted with you!"
"He is he married my former
wife!" Puck.
NOT THE DOG'S FAULT
"How many pictures of women one
sees in the newspapers nowadays,
photographed with their dogs!"
"Yes. But the dogs can't help it."
Browning's Mafc
CHESTNUT CHARLIE
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RECIPROCATED
"Dearest, I ordered to be sent
home today a most beautiful hat for
only $30. It's a perfect love."
"My darling, your love will be re
turned." Puck.
- J.LMLMgM,iMi(

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