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Newspaper Page Text
AIN'T NATURE WONDERFUL
i Food Prices.
The whole explanation of the why
fore of the food prices is this:
In Europe they- get the benefit out
of one stick of gum that we get out
or two. In other words, we row the
"boat and they steer, or yet some
more; we carry the hod and they
v shuffle the bricks.
It's alwayB been an unsolved mys
tery why the manufacturers of this
. country break their necks supplying"
stuff to European countries that sells
for' half and some more below what
we pay for it here. Why, right In
Chicago, where they build more meat
than Ineersoll does watches, the na
tives haven't even had an informal
introduction to meat, while over in
.Europe even the most humble wear
American-made salt pork for a sore
"Charity begins at home," and the
way things look there's "nobody
home" In this country.
But wait, let's have some fun. Let's
end this up humorous like (soft
That gilded alibi, "It's on account
of the war." For popularity it has
McCormick's "I Hear You Calling
Me" in a back seat. There is such a
thing- as pulling the wool over the
eyes, but the money hogs here didn't
stop at the orbs they'reBuffocating
Well, don't give up; there's hope.
They're going to start an investiga
tion. Ain't that nice? After a year
or more of investigation they'll come
forth with the remarkable statement
that prices have been raised.
The squirrels will never starve in
, the good old U. S. A. They don't
c have to hie hither and thither in.the
' forests for nourishment
PHONE ST. PETER
"Father, when people go to heav
en do they get to be angels right
away or do they have to pass a lot
of darned old examinations?" Lon
-7mm i . s
TILT? 1 9
STRONG MAN OF JOURNALISM
"Daddy, what did the Dead sea
"Oh, I don't know, dear."
"Daddy, where de the Zepp'lina
"I don't know."
"Daddy, when will the war end."
"I don't know."
"I say, daddy, who made you an
editor?" The Sketch.