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THE DAILY INTELLIIiENCER. VOL. XI. me ivmmmt. o(Bee—Front Street, Foot of Cherry. RATKB or ADVERTISING One l oo * lacb lassl.lst Insertion, $i sr. gach sabeeqaent insertion y, leading notice* par lino 07 tbe year or quarter at redt» «d rate*. PROFESSIONAL CARDS. C7Ms ANDERSON, SUHVBYOH. OlTIf AHD OOC*TBT WORK PBOMFTLT AKI» AOOCKATALT DO Jit Wort solicited from say pan of If n*et Sound Offias ow Clt) Drill Mora. P O. Bui «I. aiuf Sander Collection Agency Collections a Special!). orricK WITH W. U WHIT*, tnyl-tf Corner rron'and OolumMa sta. PROF. E. STEINLE, TEACHER OP PIANO MUSIC Oull for term* at r.wi leara, <orner riflh and JtO.-noo atrart*, Seattle. apM-tf PIANO Tl Xim FREDERICK NITSCHCE. piano MftU er, Of iereral years' e iperiaiice al bard's i* London, Kuslaiid, and leading hotiaea In New York. RKPA IBS,!"*** AMD HKOULATKS PIAROtt in a thorough workmanlike manner. Orders eft With Davtee, Woodruff ii (Jo., cf Seattle, will be promptly attended to. . «nl-M ARTHUR DOYLE. AUCIIITECT, orricß Uceldaulsl Hotel. ||lM ( J.J. SHEPHARD, BUILDER. Plana sn<l sperMraUona funitahed on abort SOttoe. Office at the New England Hotel. feM-tf D i; N TjBT It V. OSJ.C.CRASSE, OCNTIST.PH OAoe over L. P. Smith ft Sou's Jewelry mora. Ssllivau'* Block, Seattle. Liquid nitrous 011 le «u adiolulater«d for the pslslees oitrartlon of taelb. C. 1). EMERV, ATTORNEY - AT - LAW, HKATTLK, W. T. CUinui collected In any i>art of lb* United Slate*, Oauada or Europa IhruuKb copre»|K>ml«ut- ol li»j lalrniaUonal OullocUnii Oon.paoy, «» Broadway. X. Y JjMswtf J*a. MuNauumt. K. P. Faiunr. Joe. F.aieMaOMrr M'NMICHT, FERRY & IB NAUGHT, \rrOR\KVSAI-LAW, ittT r lb, ». T.. OfflM In lloom No. 1, op Htalr*. Opara llouar, Haattla. O. J toon. C. K Jumi. JACOBS * 4ENNER, Attorneys and Counselors at law Will practtc* ta all tba Oonrta of Waahlagto" Tanttoey. oikre oa J*mt* Street. OppoaiU OocUaatai Uotal. apld*w JOHN SI. KOLLOCK, M.D., Physician and Surgeon. Office-Mill at . trat balldtixi wm» of WmKtfto*. BraMeooe. SliU and Madlaon ate. )tIM*W DR. J. HIGHWARDEH^ PORTUCUKSC PRACTICING PHYSICIAN) OmCK AND BEBIDENCB OVKB Huyil, PanrlH A *•■«*'. liter*. rraa> Mtr*»t, Mm 11 la. dnioi Horaa -From • a. U. to Sr.m. Feuiale Diseases a Specialty. saMkwtf F B. KENDRICK, M 0., (Format 1? of Butwlo. I. T.| Physician and Surgeon. OFFICE— Parkar Hoeee. BwHwt-iws* ■hast, bvtweaa Paloa and I Ik* ata. apO « »• Wsarra, ¥ i). atnrva wiuuaan, a a Qt& SMITH* WILLARD, Physicians and Surgssns. WFIOT IN DOLMAN'S BLOC*. CF ST A IBS. Qa«e Boata—From I lo I sad tram T to* pjn. ' Dr« Oa C* ROOTe ____ •fWE-Mill St.tel. Foot of Frset Street, « am of tta tooaas formerly oeeupteS By Dta. Baslay. BOOBS FBOU 8 A. V. TO « F. *. I,IBSQ. JyMtf Dr. D. W. STAR KEY, Homeopathic WaiCIM AND auasEon, FBOBT BTBEET, •mstle SaUfeaa Block, Seattle. V. T. ■' ■JWAB FHRNIDE^IT. » H i' lt I ,T M Pre * ,de °t.' Wg»n Mr Uotterby, of Prospect street, the other morning. u be passed his cup over for • second sip of toffee—*if I«n p re>ll . dent of tbe United States ' •Which 70a ain'tyou knowf br.ke in Mr* B, in m irgnnieiitil Mid u tisr tone. •And oot likelj to be.' added Mrt B's mother, with s contemptuous t<••• of th« head »»sent*d Mr f{. pitasan' ly, •But I was jn»t aoppokii.g the caae ' *Tb«fi suppose som'-thiug in reason.' retorted Mis B, snappishly; *Vru might M *•" "Oppose yoo was the man in the moon, or the man in the iron mask, or 'Ho I might, my dear to I might,' assented Mr B, still pleasantly smil >og, 'bat that baa nothing to do with it. I was merely going to say that if I waa President of the Uoited States I d •MyT burst io Mm Gertrude, igfd eighteen. if yoo was, pa. wontdn't it ba splendid! Just to think bow those Wbeedletnp jfirls woold chaise their tune when I m»t them; iustead oi throwing oat tbeir Insinuations about p«opl* who coosidsr it nioe to turn tbeir last season's silk so tbst they may have mora to give to charity. But th«*y might turn green with envy before I d em—' •Vea. end wouldn't I warm it to Ham my J)ugsn just!' chirped in Master Thomas, aged twelve; Td go up to him and smack him on tbe a< >ee witb » brick before be knowed where he was, end be das sent bit me back then cause it would be treason, and they 'd bsng bim! and I'd alide on the sidewalk end sby snowballs »t the polioea an, | end ssss Miss Ftrule. snd play hookey every dsy when it didn't rain, snd - and-I'd' 'Yes,' chime*! in Mrs B. catching the infection from her enthusiastic progeny. *and then I'd be tbe first lady in tbe land, let tbe next lis who si>e would; snd the senstors' snd governors' wives would beg to b* iiifn.duced t.> me. Slid I'd havs balls twice a wtt k snd banquets every dsy. an——' 'And I'd hsvethe management of the White Hoose snd run things,' remarked Mrs B's mother, her eyes spsrkling with the prospect. 'Not much you wouldn't,' from Mi*a Gertrude, 'not if I kept my health and knew myself, yen wouldn't; not as long ss 1 was tbe President's daugliter snd-' •Yah!" t-jaoolated Master Tom, I f;uetw the President's BUD would lH) the >igg*at plum in that di«b! Wouldn't I be the I'rinoe of Wbalea then—«a)» What would you know about—' *Bhut up,all of you,' commanded Mr* 1). *1 reckon the Preaident'a wife ia the highest authority m the laud! Anyhow thero'd Ite a dusty old time if anybody questioned it, and 1 bet when the exer viaea were finished the survivors would not a*k tor any electoral cornmissieu to deoide it over again My! I'd like to see anybody- But, by the way, Mr But terby, what was it yon was going to aay you wonld do if you was the Presi dent of the United States?' K«»a»gu M soon M tbe Lord would let u»e!' Mid Mr Butterby, calmly but determinedly. And then a meditative silence fell on tbe family end remained there uutil tbe meeting arose. HK WAS A SINCEII. The orator's plaoe was taken by a singer wbn answ. red to tbe name of Justin Joces. He was a veritable ►kel eton in build. Tbe fattest thing about bim was bis eje-winkers. Six feet tall, be soaroely east a shadow as be stood in tbe morning son and roplied to bis honor's qaeriee. •Where do you live?' 'Ob, back here io the country.' •Wbat do yoo do?' 'I fares.' 'What b:OOght you t> tbe city ye* terday?' 'I came to buy some powder.' 'And wbat did yi u d iuk?' 'Knot beer.' 'Uootbeei! Didn't r u know liettt-r than to swallow sucb ti< ry atuff as that? I'll bet it waan't tl*e minutes before yon were drunk.' 'lt wasu't over two, your Hoi.or.' was the bumble reply. 'And yoo don't remember what you did after you loot your sober seue*s?' 'I solemnly affirm that Ido uot. I hope I did not onmmit murder.' 'lt was the sett thing is it. Yoo wandered into a vacant lot, slept till an boar after midnight, and thm aroused fifteen or twenty familiea by jour singing.' 'My singing? Why,'l can't sing a Bote to save my life.' 'Well, it was an attempt at sinking. Here are reliable witneesea who will swear that ohilvirru ci i<-d with terror and dogs crawled under tbe home in abjeet fear. If yoa bad stopped with 'Mollie Darling' you eould have been forgiven, but you kepi up tbe tot tore even after two policemen L«d shaken you out of your boots.' 'Then I sung, did Ii" naked the prie oner, whose faee bad assume 1 a very solemn expression. •Too aid.' 'And it was after midnigbc'r' •It was.' •Well, I deeerve six moßths in jail, sad yoa can make out tbe papers ' •I thought I'd make it tbiity days or $5 fiaa. •Well, that's letting me off essy. I'm a fool, and am willing to pay smart foe it. If 1 should be awakened at nifcht by >och singing as 1 sing, I'd never rest till 1 had killed tte singer, Hera's your five, and I guess I'll go.' •IM root boor alone.' I will.' ...... •And be oarefel that you don t dnuk too saooh soda water.' •Ton bet.' •And beware of pop.' •Beware she is! Buttermilk isgoiog to be my beverage after this, and if ton never see me again please roassmbor that I quit si aging as soaa as I sasse to realiss the sUaation. Fare tbae welt' SEATTLE, WASHINGTON TERRITORY, FRIDAY, JULY 29, ISSI. COINING! COINING! COMING! Osr new stock is new csnisg in. It will be the- MAMMOTH Stock of the Country/ Since it got to be fashionable for everybody to say they can UNDERSELL, We will simpy invite the Public to call and convince- themselves* We charge nothing for showing goods. Our induce ments in CLOTHING, HATS & BOOTS Are perfectly stunning, THE VERY LATEST STYLES OF SUITS From Cight Dollars upwards* Sucli iuduooniGnts woro novor ofTorod. in tliis or any ottior in terior town. Como and. oonylnoe yoursolvo«. WE RETAIL Groceries* Provisions, Agricultural Implements, Hardware, &c., &c„ AT WHOLESALE PRICES. o_ REI M Jhi IMC U3D R., our soodfl are puroliaaod in tlio siaat, AND FOR CASH! Ttius enabling un to give our pa trons tlio entire benefit of a itnn Francisco profit, j: SCHWAB ACHER BROS. MISCELLANEOUS. HARVESTING MACHINERY Imported direct from the We constantly have in stock the world-rencwned D. M. Osborne & Co. Front and Renr-< iit Mowers, Independent wli'-ralte Keapers, Nell-rake Reapers and Mowers combined, T"\vine antl SSelf-I linden*. A FI LL STOCK OF EXTIIAS FOR ALL MACHINES. Horso Hay Hallos, cfc. The celebrated Studebaker Farm and Spring Wagons A\l> THE LABOEST STOCK OF HARDWARE Ib Seattle. Catalogues ooiit on application WALI) X CAMPBKLL, na<MUwtf Front tr—t Swattle W. A. HARRINGTON, ANDREW SMITH, lt e * Sen Francisco. HARRINGTON & SMITH SUCCESSORS TO CK.VWFORD & HARRINGTON, Importers and Wholesale Dealers in GROCERIES, PROVISIONS, IIAROWARE, Flour and Feed, Iron and Steel, Paints, Oils, Croekerv and* Glassware. ALSO COMPLETE STOCK OF BOOTS AND SHOES. AGENTS FOR Red Crown Flour Mills, of Alban** Eureka Lime Co., San Juan, Fish Bros- & Co.'s Wagons, —AND— Imperial Northern, Queen and London Insurance Companies OF LONDON AND LIVERPOOL. Aggregate Capital 538.0rn.000 HARRINGTON <fc SMITH, nis-tf Commercial st * Seattle* W, T. J. SCHRAM <fc CO., SUCCESSORS TO HUGH McALEERJA CO. VVholesale ami lletail I)eal«rN in Stoves, Ranges. Tinware, COPPER WIRE (; |t i ,\ | T | STEAM PIPE, OAS PIPE, STEAM AND A( J.' ~ GAS FITTING Brass Goods SHEET LEAb, SHEET COPPER Aftll ZIKC. All JOB WORK i*rtaining to tbe l-übiness |>roui}>tlv attended U . Orders from abroad solicited, and satisfaction guaranteed. Great Roduotion Itt p r j 00 » Lif CALL ANI) EXAMINE GOODS. J* SCHRAM Cb CO,, COMMERCIAL STREET, SEATTLE W T battle. Jnly I. Ijsst. . . dfcwU "" »'""»»"» " .LB..T PUGET FOUNDRY. WILLIAMSON A KELLOOU, ( ItOFRIKTORs. ALL KINDS OF IRON AND BRASS CASTING Doue «t fh«»rt i.otice and in i utitfictorj maonrr. dai-ts _ yr°nt-»tr«e«. Seattle, W. T. WA CHONG & CO H CHTjITA TEA WOlllj mmm iOviM, ad «ikm : : And »'■; kind, of ALL KINDS OF TEA DIRECT FROM CHINA, THE PUREST AND fIEST* Price from 40 cinU to 96 per lb. *»*•* *°fccnmot ntd Third atiMta. MU*. 4mll*U SAMUEL KBNNEY, BIKUCIIAmV HAS ON HAND a CHOICE AOjoaTMKNT Of GENTS' SUITS AND FURNISHING GOODS HM— • ••■ u * Habbtt «n4i, LmU mmJ Mu**,' ttaitcr*. aois. *** ><i«M lOMMIRCIAI STB KIT. MAT ILK. *1 rat l>u #»*»» or Cuutti A Cuu. ISO. 42.