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Image provided by: State Historical Society of Missouri; Columbia, MO
Newspaper Page Text
UmB REPUBLIC: BTTNDXY, MXBOH 8. 1903.
ALPHONSG ANP GASTON IN AFRICA.
Their FViend Leon Photographs em Infant Rhinoceros.
Copyright. I3C8. by "W. R. Hearst Great Britain Rtshts Reserved,
" !Z IITISABABA P- " -v fONE OF A
e--' F$sjA J- "--i- ?S j FRIENDS 1 ALpK0NSgJ A I DEAR n ily-BlfllPiJ
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A STORY WITHOUT, WORDS.
TOE VIIXAGE WENTIST.
trmfer:"'I wonlfl lli to have a tooth pulled."
jLpprectlce: 'Tin aorry, but the boss la asleep. Ha had a man here thl memliis
ad bad auch a hard time of It that ha cot all tired out" Menendorfer Blaatter.
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THE WBA-THBn PROPHHTS DTT.RMVA.
"I oturbt to prophesy a aever winter, but Z have no money left for a fur cap which
ywlfe would demand then'FHerende Blaatter.
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Het "How do you like the new playt"
Ml! "Not t all! Such an Improbable plot! For Instance, the marriage ot the hero
and heroine two daya after their audden engaaTementl Why, no dressmaker could -furnish
hrtdal dress In so short a tisaer-JTllecende) Slaettac
CSiolly: "Tour father told me that I was
the black sheep of the family."
Mabel: "What did you aayr
Cholly: "Bah!" Scraps.
"After your experience with Mlaa Jllter
last evening. I suppose you are 'prepared
to renounce your expressed enthuMsatlo ver
dict as to her being- a poem!"
"Oh, not altogether. I found her fulte
a-veree to me still." Richmond Dispatch.
Oolne Him One Better.
Newly wed (proudly): "I Always make It a
point to tell my wife everything; that hap
pens." Old Sportf "Pooh! That's nothing-. I tell
my wife lots of thine that never hap
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AN EXPENSIVE ROAST.
"Now that you have at last killed a rabbit, I will prepare It myself."
"Oh, don't, dear; let the cook do It Just think, the rabbit haa cost ne almost I
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SHE WOUU GrVBNT PRICB. !ftMKIil
jnu. juoi Liiiita . uua7 aa me; guiugcu-fll lor A US8
Old Maid: ".Why, I would gladly give theamount for .kls, too,"-
if - " V