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ESTABLISHED FEBRUARY 8, 1846.
Vol. 44, No. S3. Enteral at Pittsburg Postofflce,
November 14, 18ST, as second-class matter.
Business Office 97 and 09 Fifth Avenue.
News Booms and Publishing House 75,
77 and 79 Diamond Street.
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PITTSBURG, TUESDAY, MAR. 12, 1SS9.
G0VEEN 0B BEAVEE AKD A BILL.
A little cloud of mystery which- has
gradually gathered around GorernorBeaver
and his attitude toward the general revenue
bill, has been nicely riven by The Dis
patch's Harrisburg correspondent The
latter interviewed the Governor of the Com
monwealth yesterday, and obtained from
him an explanation that is timely and re
assuring, and which will be found elsewhere
in this issue.
The assertion has been often made of late
that Governor Beaver, for reasons of his
own, wished the Legislature to pass the
general revenue bill as it stands to-day.
This Governor Beaver now denies flatly,
and in a general way expresses his lack of
interest in the character of legislation until
it comes before him for official action. At
the same time, while he professes to know
nothing in particular about the general
revenue bill's merits or demerits, he does
not abstain from pointing out that
the deficiency in the revenue
caused by the abolition of the tax on the
gross receipts of the corporations, and the
possible diminution of revenue by the pas
sage of the prohibition amendment ought to
be provided for. Further than this Gov
ernor Beaver's remarks are strictly non
committal. As the debate on the general revenue bill
will commence to-night this information
may be profitable to the legislators. The
bill demands careful discussion and re
vision in several respects, and too much
. light cannot be shed upon it.
THE SPECULATIVE DANGER.
The representation which has been made
in some quarters that the new scheme of is
suing pig iron storage certificates fore
shadows the establishment oi a monopoly
in that industry has little foundation in the
fact; but the much more intelligent fear is
that it will convert that staple.into a foot
ball of speculation and thus dangerously in
terfere Vith the legitimate movements of
Parallels to the methods of dealing pro
posed for the pig iron industry are to be
found in the grain and petroleum trades.
The custom of storing grain and dealing in
the certificates is a generation old; but no
one has ever yet been able to monopolize
the business. On the other hand, the same
custom in the petroleum trade has been ac
companied by the establishment of the
Standard Oil supremacy; but that the cer
tificate system was an incident and not a cause
of the monopoly, is shown by the fact that
the certificate dealings were only in crude
petroleum, while the Standard's monopoly
was of the refining trade, and has mainly
affected the crude interest by presenting but
a single purchaser for actual use in the
On the other hand there is no question
that speculation which is facilitated by the
certificate system has been greatly to the
disadvantage of legitimate business in those
staples. No more decided example of the
fact is required than the history of the grain
trade for the past two years. Corners have
been formed which artificially enhanced
the price of the staple at once checking
exportation and stimulating shipments
from the producers. Whpn the corner is
over the excessive stocks brought into mar
ket have depressed the price as factitiously
as it was previously advanced. "When the
same features are accompanied'as in the pe
troleum trade, by the presence of a power in
the market which is able to govern these
fluctuations to suit its selfish ends there is
little reason lor wonder that the general in
terest is demoralized and u'nprosperous.
It is solid truth, as asserted by the Kew
York ZViotme.' "It is the history of specula
tion that it has always caused, in the long
run, wider and more disastrous fluctuations
in prices than have occurred in articles not
speculative in character." Kb better evi
dence could be asked than the fact that
while the speculative articles have under
gone yearly, during the past half dozen
years, fluctuations of 23 to 50 per cent, the
iron trade has not known an extreme fluctu
ation of 5 per cent That interest should be
slow to exchange its present stability and
conservatism for a system which contains1
the possibility of such business gambling as
has been common in grain stocks and pe
troleum. MACADAMIZED B0ADS XS VIEW.
One of the best movements in these parts
for many a day is that in favor of good
country roads. The introduction of a bill
on the subject in the Legislature, the discus
sion of the matter by thePittsburgEngineers'
Society, and the contribution of views from
those who know how excellently and how
cheaply country roads are kept in Europe
will help to open the farmers' eyes.
We hope the topic will not be permitted
to drop. The increased value of farms near
cities and towns, if easily accessible at all
seasons to vehicles; the saving in horse-'
power, wear and tear of vehicles and har-1
ness; the comfort to dwellers in the country,
and the beneficial influence alike on mind
and temper unite to recommend the imme
diate and general use of macadamized in
place of clay roads.
But a few experiments are needed to in
sure the adoption of this system extensively
through the Commonwealth.
BEFOBM THE MATT, SERVICE.
John Wanamaker has an excellent op--portunity
to-distinguish himself in the ad
ministration of his present office and at the
'same time add to his reputation, already
' rreat, as a successful man of business. If
half the reports be true .the, postal service,
as it now exists, stands in great need of a
general, overhauling. The pojicy pursued
while Hr. Dickinson was ttt the bead of the
department, of turning out experienced men
to make places for party favorites and
political workers, was one not calculated to
add to or improve the efficiency of the
The railway mail service seems to have
suffered most, and that branch is the one
where inexperience or incompetence can
least be tolerated. The public is patient
and uncomplaining as to the manner in
which the agents of the Government in gen
eral perform their outside duties, but when
letters are delayed, lost, or go astray, the ef
fect is so damaging to their interests that
business men have a right to protest. The
postal service ought to be administered
without regard to partisanship, but with
special care to secure efficiency and prompt
ness in the discharge of duty, If Mr.
Wanamaker can remedy the mistakes of his
predecessor and make the mail service what
it should be, he will win the lasting grati
tude both of Democrats and Republicans.
A VITAL PBINCD7LE.
The leading commercial bodies of Phila
delphia have brought up an is'sue with refer
ence to transportation privileges to be granted
in large cities that involves a principle of
vital importance to the whole nation. The
Commercial, Maritime and Producers' Ex
changes of that city have united in asking
the Legislature to insist, in connection with
the proposed grant of 300,000 to aid in the
improvement of the Delaware river, upon
the construction of a railroad along the
river front, which shall be open to any rail
way carrier that may reach it.
Such a recommendation commends it
self to any unprejudiced mind. The full
benefit of harbor improvement cannot be se
cured and such a provision would convert
every wharf into a railway depot, and allow
the full benefit of all terminal facilities to
every carrier that reaches Philadelphia. It
is plain that such a provision would notonly
be a great gain to the commerce of Philadel
phia, but its advantages would be extended
to all railroads equally, and through them
to all shippers that may desire to ship
freight to thattcity.
But it is not necessary to stop there. The
advantage and justice of giving all carriers
equal access to the wharves being recog
nized, the same principle should be extend
ed to all occupancy of public property- by
railways in cities. "When a street is sur
rendered to the use of a railway it should
be recognized that all railways that can
reach the city have an equal right to that
street, subject of course to equitable pay
meat for the use of the tract. The funda
mental character of a public street is the
equal right of all persons to use it; and if
its use is given to one railway, it should be
given to all others that desire it If that
principle is enforced it would place all rail
ways on an equal footing in reaching cities
and would preserve the streets of cities from
a universal gridironing, by making a single
belt line answer the purposes of all the
railway carriers doing business in a given
"When this subject is properly appreciated
the principle will be recognized that all
railway lines traversing the streets and
docks of the city must be so far public as to
be open to the use of all railway carriers
that may wish to do business at that point.
IT SHOOTS BOTH WAYS. '
There is an especial interest in the method
used by the JTew York TTorfd to reply to
what it scents'as a "partisan sneer at politi
cal opponents" in General Harrison's in
augural. In reply to the President's refer
ence to political reform, the TForW points
out that the Australian ballot reform bill
was opposed by Bepublican votes in the
Indiana and Maine Legislatures, which it
conceives to prove Bepublican "hostility to
any eflective law for throwing effective safe
guards about theballot-box and the elector."
The direct inference that, in the World's
opinion, opposition to ballot reform bills
indicates adherence to the system of frauds
in election, is perhaps legitimate, but it
should be applied to both parties. This
view is strengthened by the assertion that
"as an honest man himself, President Har
rison ought to know and to admit that the
honest men of both parties are equally in
terested in a reform of the election laws."
This leads to the inevitable deduction that
those in both parties who are opposed to such
a reform are not honest men.
"We have no disposition to criticise the
premises, but it is necessary to urge upon
the World the importance of using its
usual outspokenness in making the appli
cation. The most prominent example of
opposition to such legislation is afforded by
one David B. Hill who, as Governor of
New York, vetoed an electoral reform bill, and
was thereafter renominated and re-elected
by the Democracy of New York. As this
question was made an issue in the canvass
it is somewhat difficult to see how the alle
gation of dishonesty, made by the World,
can be diverted from Governor Hill and his
supporters, among which, if we are not very
much mistaken, was the .esteemed World
Our valuable cotemporary's logic ris
effective, but is very dangerous at the
breech. It affixes to Governor Hill and his
supporters, by a well-qualified judge, the
undoubted characteristic of dishonesty.
A B0MANTIC BOBBEB,
It is ' not customary to look for the finer
sensibilities.or more gracious traits of hu
manity in men who follow burglary as a
profession. As soon would one impute a
taste for the culture of orchids to a skunk
as a generous sympathetic nature to a noc
turnal thief. Therefore it will be generally
admitted upon examination of his record
that William Harris, an English -expert in
the use of skeleton keys, crowbars and other
burglarious tools, is a phenomenal flower
in his profession.
William Harris left his country, conspic
uously for his country's good, and honored
New York city with his professional atten
tions. He was captured in the latter place
last week, but not before he had visited
many h6uses, and secured considerable plun
der. It is a fact that he, invariablv
chose his victims from among the
rich. This -might have been
because rich men are the most profitable
to pluck, but Mr. Harris assures us that he
was actuated in his selection by motives of
the highest humanity. Like Robin Hood
he robbed the rich only. He was consider
ate even when he was making off with the
valuables of a millionaire. It was his cus
tom to leave a note at every house he visited,
stating that if he had by chance taken any
article endeared to his victims by, tender as
sociations of a'ny kind, he could be relied
upon to return it for a suitable reward
offered through the newspapers.
Mr. Harris shows that even the gentle
burglar, in his humble way, can add some
thing to the record of romantic humbug.
Following his example the meanest hen
roost robber may lend a poetic flavor to his
pursuitseven if prosaic buckshot prove, his
final reword. But we trusfMiv' Harris will
be led to perceive4 that burglary and senti
ment do notH mix well, and that by con
fining himself to the latter he 'might have
escaped the years of penal servitude which
he will now have to endure. A good, stiff
sentence may help Mr. Harris to a clearer
understanding of the true relations between
sentiment and thievery.
ANOTHER FORM OF THE DANGER.
A very interesting discussion is going on
before a committee of the Massachusetts
Legislature with regard to the danger from
overhead wires as means of furnishing
power to" electric street cars. The repre
sentation of the danger from so heavily
charged wires is of course met by testimony
on the part of the companies, that they are
not so dangerous as is supposed, but the evi
dence of their safety is. by no means con
vincing. Another disadvantage has recent
ly been experienced in Cleveland where
along the line of a road operated by over
head wires the telephones have become al
most useless from the-induction of the more
It certainly does not seem proper that
aiter such convincing proofs of the danger
of electric light wires have been given that
the public-should be exposed either to that
danger or to the one which comes from the
more powerful current required to move
street cars. It is all the more wanton to do
it when the danger is so easily avoided.
The same underground conduit that affords
accommodation to the electric railway
wires could be used for the electric light
current; while a separate conduit can be
supplied for telephone and telegraph wires.
This may cost more than the pole system, it
is true, but beside the enhanced safety the
cost is infinitessimal. The platform should
be made universal that electric railway
wires, like all other electric wires, must go
What the copper syndicate really wants
is to take a leaf from Senator Stewart's
book, and elect a statesman to urge bills
requiring the Secretary of the Treasury to
purchase 4,000.000 worth of copper each
Senator Fakwell has again demons
trated that he is not true to, Bepublican
principles, by antagonizing in an interview
the declaration of the party platform and
the pledges of the President on the question
of the Civil Service. Consequently on the
Senator's own basis, a partisan Civil Service,
he has placed himself outside of the party
lines, and is not entitled even to a fourth
Perhaps the announcement that "S. J.
McKallip is a candidate for Public, Printer
from Pittsburg," will enthuse local politi
cal circles when they get a little clearer in
formation as to who the gentleman is.
The failure of the Findlay Iron and
Steel Company is said by the Chicago Times
(free-trade) to "celebrate the return of the
party of protection to American industries
to power." What it really does, however,
is to add another to the practical lessons on
the folly of locating iron and steel manu
factures away from the natural centers of
The report that Chicago has abolished
the name of God from her school-books,
suggests that the reason is probably a desire
to anticipate the danger that God would
The report that President Harrison's de
clination to shake hands with every one at
his last reception "provoked much unfavora
ble comment," is another proof that the
element who consider it a great American
privilege to maul the hand of the Chief
Magistrate still offers a splendid field for
the exercise of the functions of the fool
killer. Having had "Jack the Bipper," "Jack
the Kisser" and "Jack the Choker" there is
an urgent need for completing the series by
a specimen of "Jack the Dangler."
A Pougheeefsie man drew a cigar
lighter on another man and was at once ar
rested, and bound over to keep tne peace.
This harsh course was probably justified
by the suspicion that he intended to follow
up his offensive activity by giving the other
fellow a Poughkeepsie cigar.
The Samoan war and the appearance of
the Countess di Montercoli on the stage are
ihe latest stock subjects for the efforts of
The very strong indication afforded by
ihe new legislation in the Canadian Par
liament for the extradition of embezzlers,
that Canada is sick of our boodlers, is also
an indication that boodlers must have spent
most of the money.
Wheat continues to decline having got
down below the dollar line again. Let flour
follow the example and all may be for
given. With the Spanish, Swiss and Japanese
missions filled, the chauces of the editorial
aspirants are just so much diminished; but
while the English, French, Italian and
German places are left open there is both
life and hopes.
PERSONAL FACTS AND FANCIES.
The Shah will be domiciled at Stafford
House when he visits .London.
A fixe statue of the late Bishop Bappe Is
soon to be unveiled at Cleveland.
Among the curiosities of the Queen's rail
way journeys has the time tables supplied to
Her Majesty, these Being printed In violet ink
on hand-made paper with gilt edges. They
contain the exact times of the stoppages at
all points, and give other information of in
Cabdinai, Manning will celebrate the
twenty-fifth anniversary of his Episcopal con
secration on June 8, 1890. A fund Is being
raised as a testimonial to pay off the 60,000
debt on his cathedral, so that the building may
be consecrated on or before his own anni
versary, The Prince of Wales has perhaps the finest
'railway coach in Europe. The Southeastern
built it, and it contains seven rooms, there
being a study, little library, a couple of bed
rooms, & dressing room and a bathroom. The
bedroom Is most luxuriously furnished in old
gold s'ilk, being lighted by electricity, and the
pannelllng Is beautifully painted. The Prince
uses his carnage for all his jonrneys.
Recently the Prince of Wales made his
first appearance in the gambling rooms at
Monte Carlo since his arrival on the Riviera.
Very little notice was taken of his Royal High
ness by anybody there, few people recognizing
him, or if they did, not' being sufficiently im
pressed by his personality to look at him a sec
ond time. He patronized the roulette tables In
preference to the more select Trente-et-Quar-ante,
where most of the English statesmen
have been disporting themselves for the last
month. The Prince stood at the end of the
table and every nowandthen gave the croupier
a 100-franc piece to put down for htm on a
batch of numbers. But every time he. staked
his 4 they were remorselessly raked in, to the
very evident mortification of the royal punter,
who played a losing game extremely badly. ,
THE TOPICAL TALKEB,
A Little of the Lighter Side ol Life Briefly
There was a time," said a theatrical man a
few days ago, "when the critics of the newspa
pers throughout the country- were not as in
corruptible as they generally are to-day. In
those days, and I am speaking of an era not
beyond the recollection of a middle-aged man,
it could not have been said, as The Dispatch
truthfully remarked the other day, that the
dramatic critics were beyond the reach of a
"I remember a case in point Once upon a
time I was engaged to manage an actress
-whoso only claim for recognition was her great
beauty. She was a lovely woman and a des
perately bad actress. Tne backer of the show
had not a very fat bank account, so I had to
rely upon, my star's good looks and charming
manners off the stage to pull us through. We
got along fairly well till we reached a large
city, where I knew the principal newspaper had
a disagreeable habit of making things lively
for stars who traveled on anything but sheer
ability to act
"I was afraid of, the dramatic editor of that
paper, but I resolved to try my best to square
him. My previous experience with him taught
me that he had an oye for feminine beauty. I
told my star, therefore, that she must try her
best to charm this critical ogre into amiability,
and I promised her that 1 would give her a
"On the afternoon of the Monday our com
pany was to appear for the first time I visited
the captious critic, and begged him to take
dinner with mo at the hotel. He agreed, but
dropped a very plain hint that I must not ex
pect any favors in the critical line.
"I arranged that my fair principal should
dine with us, and hade her try her best to cap
ture the critic Dressed very modestly but
most becomingly, she appeared at dinner,
which was served in a private room, and I ex
plained to my guest that her presence was acci
dentalthat I had invited her to dine with me
and had forgotten the engagement
"She exerted herself nobly, and when tho
dinner was oveij I knew that we were safe that
at least there would be no slashing critique,
and that perhaps we might get a favorable
"The result exceeded jny hopes; the paper
which I had feared so much had a pleasant and
tolerably long article next day, in which the
writer laid stress upon my star's beauty and
allowed the Inference to be drawn that she was
a good actress as well.
"There was a change of billjm the middle of
the week, but I was not anxious, for the first
notice had been favorable without exception.
What was my surprise the next morning when
I read in the paper I have spoken of a perfect
ly diabolical dissection of my star. It was one
of the brightest things of the kind Pve ever
seen, but you can imaging that I didn't appre
ciate the slaughter of my star. Late in the
day the critic of the paper called o see me. He
said he'd been sick the day before, and another
member of the editorial force had taken his
place at the theater. Well, there was no
remedy for any of us, but the critic, I think,
was the worst hurt"
A curious phenomenon came under my eyes
on Saturday, which goes to illustrate the disa
greeable side of a locomotive engineer's life.
Seated In the corner of the car nearest to the
locomotive of the fastest local express that
runs out of this city, the Beaver Falls express,
on the Fort Wayne, a clear view of the ' track
ahead was afforded me. It was sno-KTng just
enough to make it difficult to see more than 200
yards ahead of the train.
As soon as the train clears the city limits it
runs at a speed ranging from 30 to 60 miles an
hour, and often for a mile or two strikes a
steady gait of not less than a mile a minute.
At Jack's Bun station I saw a man deliberately
cross the track not oO yards ahead of our train.
When we came to Bellevue station a small boy
waited on the south side of the track till the
train was less than 50 yards away, and then ran
over to the north side. For a moment I
thought the boy was under the wheels, so nar
rowly did he escape. Thereafter for a distance
of a mile or so at every station, and at every
possible crossing, some one appeared to be
waiting to put his life in jeopardy.
Perhaps locomotive engineers get used to
avoiding involuntary manslaughter by a hair's
breadtb, with an occasional exception where a
human being is knocked into the next world as
a reward for bis foolbardlness, but the unhard
enea traveler cannot help bnt wish that rail
road tracks were better inclosed, and that the
penalty for trespassing on them were high and
The felto Selected for the Female Industrial
Philadelphia, March II. A project that
has oeen contemplated for some time by Mr.
A. J. Drexel has been put in practical shape
by the purchase of the Louella mansion at
Wayne, Delaware county, and the selection of
trustees and managers for the "Drexel Indus
trial College lor Women." The object of the
Institution, as set forth in the charter, is to in
struct females between the ages of 13 and 19
years in all duties appertaining to the care of a
household, and to teach such trade3 and busi
ness as will make them practical women, able
to earn a respectable livelihood.
The benefits of the coll ere aro tobe extended,
first, to the daughters of clergymen and second
to daughters of respectable parents who,
through adverse circumstances, are unable to
give their children proper training and educa
tion. The entire expense of the purchase, new
structures and endowment will be met by Mr.
Drexel, and the amount it Is said, will reach
$1,500,000. In connection with the college, in
struction will be given upon the plan of the
Cooper Institute, Dy which pupils will derive
tuition .while residing at their own homes.
FORCED TO DECLINE WITH THANKS.
A Yale Professor Unable to Become Secre
tary Busk's Assistant.
Special Telegram to the Dlsnatcn.
New Haven, Conn., March It Prof. Will
iam H. Brewer has been asked to allow his
name to be used in connection with the First
Assistant Secretaryship under Jeremiah Busk,
Secretary of the Agricultural Department
Secretary Busk Is not only willing but anxious
to have Prof. Brewer accept the position, in
order that he may be a counsellor on arranging
the laying out of the work of the new depart
ment. A dispatch has been received from
headquarters to the effect that should Prof.
Brewer allow his name to be used his Im
mediate appointment would follow.
The recent death of his wife and his own ill
i health led the professor to decline. Prof.
Brewer holds the "JXorton Professorship of
Agriculture" In the Sheffield Scientific Depart
ment, and is an acknowledged authority on all
matters pertaining to agriculture.
A TOTJNG LADI DIES OF NOSEBLEED.
Singular and Fatal Termination of a Cold In
Special Telegram to The DlSDatch.
Poughkeepsie, N.TT., March 16. Miss Lulu
May Mackinlay, of New York, died at Vassar
College Sunday morning. A few days ago she
became slightly ill of what was apparently a
cold in the head. It becoming serious she went
to the intlnriary andwas put under treatment
Suddenly on Thursday she was attacked with
bleeding at the nose, and the college physician
bad great difficulty in checking the flow of
Every effort was made to stop the flow of
blood. Partial success was met but each re
turning hemorrhage was worse than Its pred
ecessor, and the young lady finally died of
exhaustion. Funeral services were held at the
college to-day, and the body removed to New
DEATHS OP A DAL
Mrs. Rev. W. B. Hamilton.
WASHINGTON, PA., March It A letter received
here to-day announces the death of Mrs. Rev. W.
B. Hamilton, January1 10, last, at Chlnafa, China.
In company with "her young husband she left
Washington In September last. A few 'days after
their arrival Mrs. Hamilton was taken 111 with
consumption, and a week later died. Deceased
graduated at the seminary here In 1SS5. iler
father is a resident of Bellevernon, Pa.
Mrs. Margaret Craig;.
Mrs. Margaret Craig died yesterday at the ad
vanced agte of 82 years. She has been a resident of
Pittsburg for nearly d years. Until a few days
days ago she was able to visit her children. Her
memory was clear and bright until the last. She
was the mother of Mr. 11. Craig and James M.
Craig, who, with four daughters, surylTS her.
The pallbearers will be eight grandsons.
CONNELL6VHJ.E. March U.-John Mahon, one
of the most widely known residents of Connells
vllle, died at his home on Water street yesterday,
aged 75 years. He was a former resident of Pitts
burg. The remains will be Interred Wednesday,
morning. - $,
-- " v
TUESDAY, MAECH .12,
AT THE THEATERS.
Henrietta Revealed Ballets
Scenery Other Plays.
In spite of the obliging hInts.of the lucky
elect who saw Bronson Howard's "The Henri
etta" In New York most Pittsburgers till now
have been at a loss, to know what "The Henri
etta" might be. Was it a chestnut filly, a
ballet girl, the witch of Wall street or
whatf Now, everybody who has a
small store of com to spare can discover
hat "The Henrietta" is one of the best if
not the best of comedies written by an Ameri
can author. Last night "The Henrietta" was
produced at the Grand Opera House before an
apprecia'tive audience. Taking the perform
ance as a whole it is.the best Pittsburg is likely
to see in a long while. Seldom is a company so
carefully and artistically combined sent upon
the road to play to provincials. The provincials
may, with a good deal of gratitude, take off
their hats to Messrs. Robson and Crane.
The strength of "The Henrietta"-lies equally
In plot Bitnatlon and dialogue. The plot is in
genious and absolutely new. and thongh the
possibility of a shrewd old broker like Nicholas
Yanalstyne fighting his own son and partner
on the stock market without knowing who his
adversary was may be doubted, the lines of the
plot are led so deftly to a climax that in the in
tense interest excited the unreality of the mo
tive is lost sight of. The situations are con
ceived with a- wonderful eye to effect The
glimpse of "Old Nick's" character
which his words, "Not a cent
.the blanked young pauper, not
a cent more, I'll turn him adrift on the world,1'
at the end of act I afford strikes like a ham
mer on a plear bell, the tone of the play. The
most dramatic situation is that which con
cludes act U. The younger brother, the hope
less dnde, heroically shields the elder in si
lence throwing the criminating letter, that
would Clear hiirs, into the fire.
The comedy Itself the main skeleton of the
piece, exhibits Mr. Howard's fancy in lt3 hap
piest expression. The interview between the
old bull of the Exchange and the fashionable
widow; in which the former Is trying to watch
the course of the stockmarket on the ticker
and to propose to the lady at the same time, is
deliciously funny. So in everything that in
volves either of the principal actors, Messrs.
Robson and Crane. '
Nowas to these principalsi one might write
all night and yet fall to convev how natural
and bow harmonious is the old stockbroking
king of Wall street of Mr. Crane, and how en
tirely laughable from make up to the accent in
his laconic utterances is the Anglomaniacdnde
of Mr. Robson. They have caught the idea ofthe
dramatist; they have photographed two Ameri
can types of character, and with just a shade
of exaggeration present the pictures In the ad
mirable frame provided for them. Some may
say Mr. Crane grimaces a little too much, or
Mr. Robson relies too often on tricks of his
throat and eyes, but no one can deny that they
have stolen a couple of cartoons from nature's
magazine and reproduced them with truth and
But not all the good acting was had from the
stars. Mr. Charles Kent was powerful, though
perceptibly striving after the Irringesque in his
characterization of the villain, Nicholas VanaU
ityne, Jr. His death as far as the physical phe
nomena were concerned was terribly realistic.
Mr. George Woodward, a triumphant carica
ture in make-up of the fashionable minister,
was excellent So was Miss Ellie Wilton as
the sprightly widow. All the rest of the com
pany can be accorded praise in different de
gress, excepting possibly Mr. Lorlmer Stoddard,
who makes the burlesque of an English lord so
thoroughly absurd and unllfellke, that the
real satire in the character is concealed.
The scenery and every adjunct to the play is
of the best The production is delightful in
There was a perfect jam of people
at the Bijou Theater last night Every seat
was filled; the standing room was all occupied
and the demand for tickets at the box office
continued long after all available space In the
house was sold. Apparently there has heen no
attraction in town this season which the publio
was more anxious to see. Andyetitistobe
feared that the more intelligent element in the
large audience found the much-heralded pro
duction of "The Twelve Temptations" hardly
up to their expectations.
Aside from its brilliant spectacular effects
there is nothing in thepiece that calls for serious
criticism. The scenery is elaborate and abund
ant and much of it exquisitely beautiful.
Among the representations are a wreck at sea,
the ice floes ot the Northern Ocean, the coun
cil chamber of Boreas, the palace of Zero, the
snow Queen, and other scenes that are marvels
of stage magnificence. The whole Is admirably
managed, and the changes from one scene to
another are made with such rapidity and ease
that the result is like a grand panorama, af
fording a constant succession of novelties and
The dialogue amounts to nothing. It is mere
bombast without plan or purpose, save only to
Introduce a variety of tricks and clownish acts
more or less clever and amusing. The leading
roles are evidently In the hands of inex
perienced amateurs, and would be better In
most cases If there were no speaking to do
done. Some of the ladles have voices that
would grate harshly on the ear of any man not
accustomed to the noise of a machine shop.
The ballet is sufficiently strong in point of
numbers, bpt the dancing is of a very common-
Slace order. Even the premieres danseuse are
isappointlng. There Is an abundance of
pretty girls, some agile acrobats and gymnasts,
a marvelous green dragon, and some ingenious
ly made-up Polar bears and trick donkeys on
the whole enough to look, at as well as a
liberal amount of horse play and original ruses
to excite laughter.
Judging by the applause so liberally be
stowed the piece made a decided hit and will
continue to draw crowded houses. There is
enough that is attractive in the scenery alone
to partially compensate for what is lacking
The management of this house have an im
portant task before them. Better means of
handling the immense crowds that persist in
attempting to get in the lobby at just the hour
at which the curtain is advertised to ascend.
The pressure yesterday afternoon was such as
to break every pane of glass in the door. Long
before 2 and 8 o'clock the well-used "standine
room only" sign was brought out The attrac
tion this week is not a new one, by any means,
but It is one that never fails to do a big busi
ness here. James H. Wallick, in 'The Cattle
King," a real melodrama of the Wild West
melodramatic kind, with his three well-trained
horses, will play to the largest audiences of the
season. The company Mr. Wallick has with
him Is some thing of an improvement over that
of last reason, with the possible exception of
the young lady who essays the role of Catherine
JPaxton, the heroine. The horses are as good
actors as ever. "Bandit King" will be given
The' Casino Museum has many new attrac
tions this week.
Harry Williams' own company, with its
many excellent features, was received with
great favor at the Academy last night
THE sale of seats for Emma Abbott's opera
season at the Bijou begins on Thursday. The
demand for seats is already so heavy that no
doubt remains but that the popular company
will achieve unusual success.
Those popular favorites, Mr. and Mrs. W. J.
Florence, will begin a week's engagement at
the Grand Opera House next Monday evening,
supported by the best company they have ever
had, in the following repertoire of the success
ful plays: Monday and Friday evenings, "The
Mighty Dollar:" Tuesday, onlv time, :Dur
Governor, or His Little Hatchet;" Wednesday
and Saturday nights, Dickens' "Doiubey and
Son," with Florence as Captain Cuttlc.hls
greatest creation; Thursday evening and Satur
day matinee, their latest success, "Heart of
Hearts." will receive its, first presentation
here. It is said to be unlike any of the plays
yet presented by them, and both Mr. and Mrs.
Florence appear In entirely original creations.
This will be their farewell joint appearance,
Mr. Florence having contracted to star with
Jefferson next year, and Mrs. Florence will re
tire from the stage.
MORE PRECIOUS THAN GOLD.
BABIUM sells for $975 a pound, when it is
sold at all, and calcium 13 worth $1,800 a pound.
Cerium is a shade higher its 'cost Is $160 an
ounce, or $1,920 a pound. , ,
Gold Is worth about $210 per 'pound, troy;
platinum $130, and silver about $12. Nickel
would be quoted at about 60 cents, and pure
aluminum $3 to $9 to the troy pound.
These begin to look like fabulous prices,
but they do not reach the highest point;
chromium brings $200, cobalt falls to about half
the price of silver, while didymlum is the same
price as cerium, and erbium $10 cheaper on the
ounce than calcium, or jnst $1,680 per pound.
If the wealth of the Vanderbllts be not over
stated, it amounts to nearly 200,000,000. With
this sum they could purchase 312 tops of gold
and have sometlfing left over, buttbey couldn
buy two tons of gallium, that rare metal being
worth $3,250 an ouncet With this metal the
highest price Is reached, and it may well be
called the rarest and most precious of metals.
GLtJCTNtm Is worth $230 an ounce; indium,
$158; Indium, $658 a pound; Ianthanlum, $175,
and lithium $1C0 an ounce. Niobium costs
$128 an ounce; asmium, palladium, platinum,
potassium and rhodium bring respectively $610,
$400, $130. $32 and $512 per pound. Strontium
costs $128 an ounce ;.tantaum, $144; felurium, $9;
thorium, $272: vanadium, $320; yttrium, $114,
aitd zirconium $250 an ounce.
A CHANGE NEEDED.
Echoes ot Last Week's Inauguration Crush
Only One Mnn From Ohio Who Wanted
No Office Blerry Under Difficulties.
.-BPECIAI. IILEOBAM TO THE IUSPATCIM
Washington, March U. After the passage
of these six' or severidays since that terrible
4th of March, the town has almost assumed its
'normal appearance. Most of the visitors (who
still remain are of that class which will always
increase so long as the Government pays better
wages for shorter hours than are paid by private
emnlovers. There are more of these office-
1 seekers than ever before, and they seem to be
of a better type than ever before. Few oi tne
bummer element are seen. I thought I had
struck one of that kind last evening, however.
Walking along the avenue past the entrance to
a prominent saloon, a big fellow came out of
the door and down the steps, like a small cy
clone and fell upon the sidewalk with a force
that would have broken every bone in the body
of a sober man.
"1 thought it was up hill instead of down,
out of the qussed place," he Said, when he had
pulled himself together a little.
1 assisted him to a seat on the curbstone and
suggested he had better call a cab and go
"By George, that's what I want to do. I've
been here five days ana feeling good all the
time. Come to think of it, guess Pve missed
the 'nauguratlon. Show's over, Isn't it !"
"Probably you are waiting to get an office,"
"No, sir," he shouted, "I'm not here for an
office, but I'm from Ohio, and I'm the only
man in Washington from that State who
doesn't want an office." i
A Chance foV Wlsbart.
The free-and-easy character of last Sunday
has terriDiy shocked the sensibilities of those
who are rigid in their observance of the day,
and indignant resolutions are being adopted by
most of the churches condemning the contempt
for law shown by Congress and the city authori
ties. The advocates or strict Sunday rest have
made herculean efforts to influence the two
bodies which govern the District Congress and
the Commissioners, and thought they bad had
some effect Never before were the Commis
sioners so rigid In their enforcement of the
Ifcense laws as within the last few months.
For weeks some of the most prominent hotels
and restaurants were refused license on account
of their infraction of the law against selling on
Sunday, and several popular resorts were
forced to go through with the performance of
a change of proprietors, either real or sham, to
secure the required franchise.
But on Sunday every one of these places
which had been under a cloud, as well as others
which had not been, ran at full blast, with wide
open doors and with such scenes of corousal as
rarely have been witnessed before in Washing
ton. Tho rain outside drove everybody indoors
who could get in. Revelry was unchecked.and
the most serious of Christian politicians ap
peared to be mingling with the Philistines to
tally oblivious of the sacred character of the
day. The cashier of the popular resort tells
me that his house took in over $3,000 on that
Sunday, and on Monday upward of $4,000. Beer
was sold at the usual price, but the glasses had
double the ordinary foam. Thetwo-for-a-quar-ter
drinks were 15 cents straight or 20 cents;
oysters 40 cents instead of 25. and so on.
One can guess at the profit made during those
four or five days at these prices. Wages of
servants and employes of all kinds were
doubled and trebled, and with all that the
good servants seemed to have disappeared. At
one of the best restaurants of the city I was
waited on at luncheon by a fellow who was so
drunk that he emptied the soup In my lap, and
when I complained to the proprietor that
worthy informed me that the man was worth
$10 an hour to him, drunk or sober, for he
could not ;et another for that pay, and he was
then short-handed. He was absolutely at the
mercy of such help as he could secure,-and
that was bad enough.
Merry Under Difficulties.
But the good temper maintained under all
the discomfort of the season wa3 something
admirable. There were surprisingly few rows,
and those who spent most of the time in the
streets absolutely appeared to enjoy tramping
about In the mud and rain. It was a sight to
see refined-looking ladles on all sides on the
day of the inauguration splashing throngh'the
pools and slush, holding their skirts up in
the moat sensible manner, water spirting
out of their shoes at every step, merry
as though they were in their own drawing
rooms, and joking at the very worst and most
dangerous phases of the day.
Ol course there have been many deaths and
there will be many more,, on account of the ex-
Sosure, and many a case of consumption will
ate from that day, but- Inaugurations mast be
had, and if the people are always so merry and
good tempered I fancv only heaven and not the
other place will be recruited from those who
Too Much of a Good Thing.
It would seem that the weather of the
Fourth, and the experiences of that time, en
dured by those who are capable of influencing
legislation, must result in the change of the
day of the installation of the President and
Vice President And it seems tome, more
over, that the handshaking and other kinds of
persecution to which President Harrison has
been compelled to submit since his election,
and more especially since his inauguration
must bring about a revolution of public senti
ment with regard to these performances.
It has become not only an abuse of decency,
but an actual menace to the health and life of
the President and his wife, or the lady who
takes charge of the household of the Presi
dent and so is forced to pose as "the first lady
of the land," as though there could be any
first lady where one is as good as another.
Mrs. Cleveland was young and strong, but
even she was completely worn out at times
with the siege of a great reception, and on the
occasion of the last public affair of that kind
previous to the change. Mr. Cleveland was
torced to order the doors closed before the
mob had half been filed through the mansion.
I call it a "mob," because those noon whom
the doors were closed indulged in very un
seemly conduct and at one time it looked as
though the discontent might develop into a
Plenty of Visitors.
The abuse is increasing with the increase of
the vast crowds who nowmake Washington the
Mecca of the year. Every month the number
of visitors Increases, and it will soon come to
pass. If the custom be not abolished, that the
President and his family will be able to do
nothing but attend to the demands of the
thousands of curious who merely burn to say
when they go home that they have seen and
shaken hands with the President and "the first
lady of the land." Their entire time will be
occupied in this manner, to say nothing of the
dangers arising from the physical Strain.
Already President Harrison has been forced
to abandon the hand-wringing part of the cus
tom, to a great extent, and at this some grieve
and some curse. Some of the scenes are lu
dicrously pathetic. One old Republican has
attended the receptions every day this week
without having had a chance to shake the hand
of Mr. Harrison, and when asked to-day if he
I had any special business with the Ptesident be
answered in a tremulous tone mat be just
wanted to touch the hand of a Republican
President before he djed. But a vast majority
of those who make up the crowds who seem to
want to wring the'life and strength out of Mr.
and Mrs. Harrison, are merely curious and
thoughtless, and desire to only tell their friends
at borne that they have touched the coats or
the paws of some of the social and political
lions of the day.
The abuse is about to correct itself, however,
and the prospects are that very soon a Pres
ident will attract as little attention In his com
ing and going, and at his residence, as the
kings and queens of the East It is a remark
able fact that the President of the French Re
public can drive along the Champs Elysees,
King Humbert and.hls wife through the Crfrso
and among the crowds on the Pincian Hill.
King William down the Linden and about the
public drives of the Xhiergarten, and the Prince
of Wales and his wife upPlccadilly and along
the royal drive In Hyde Park, without attract
ing half the, attention that Is excited when the
President of the United States drives the
length of Pennsylvania avenue, and little cu
riosity to see them is manifested at any time,
except on the occasion of a royal fete, or show
of some kind, and then the foremost of the
curious crowds are usually visiting Americans.
GERMANS LEAD THE LI8T.
The Annual Report of tbe Arrivals at Castle
i Garden. '
N.EW York. March 11. The forty-second
annual report of tbe Board of Emigration Com
missioners, as prepared for the Legislature,
shows In substance that during tbe year 1888
the total number of passengers from all foreign
ports landed in Castle Garden was 370,822 (237,
856 males and 132, 9G0 females).
Tbe nationalities chiefly represented were
Irish, 44,300; English, 38,355; German, 78,145;
French, 1 ess tbarr 6,000; Russian, 33,052; Swedish,
37,931; Italian. 43,927: Australian. 16; Chinese,
6. Of the total number of Immigrants, 67,518
were under 15 years of age; 265,005 over that
age and under 40; 37,799 oyer 40 years.
Majbethe Judge Is Right.
rsEW TOEK BUB1UJ SrZCIALS.1
Netv VpRK. March U.In instructing the
March grand jury Judge Qildersleeve told them
that they must be extremely caret aim their
investigation of the elevated railroad charges:
that lawyers had been guilty of crimes in stir
ring up litigation in the way of damage suits
against that corporation. The Judge plainly
hinted that there was good reason to think that
the railway company was trying to use the
Criminal Court to save itself from just suits in
the civil courts.
The Coal Trade Aroused.
Tbe entire coal trade 13 aroused over a prop
osition of the Reading Company to maintain
the winter schedule of rates throughout the
summer. Rates for local consumption, It is
claimed, have been cut and the regular sum
mer schedule for many of the agents must be
lower. Another bone of contention is the mat
ter of reduced'prodnction for the year, begin
ning April. It is supposed that there will be a
falling off In consumption, and yet none of the
companies care to reduce their output These
questions will be settled at a meeting of the
agents of the companies to-morrow.
Taken Back to the Tombs.
Arrangements of the prosecution of the
Electric Sugar frauds are being pushed. Offi
cers from the District Attorney's office made
photographs to-day of the bogus refinery in
Brooklyn and all Its alleged machinery. These
will be used as part of the evidence against
the quintet from Michigan now under arrest
and indictment The prisoners were before
Recorder Smyth this morning, and the bail in
all the cases was fixed at $22,500 for each one.
This they failed to furnish and were sent to the
new lit Is Not Slayor Now.
Mayor Grant has gone completely back on
the "parade policy" of his predecessor. The
new.Mayor promised to-day that he would re
view the pageant of the Irish societies when
they turn out on St Patrick's Day.
Pat Egnn Talks a Bit
Patrick Egan is at the Astor House. Ho
declines to discuss with reporters the proba
bility of his appointment to a foreign mission.
In regard to Pigott's forgeries, he says that he
suspected the perjurer two years ago. After
secunng the Times fac similles Mr. Egan sub
mitted them, with some of Pigott's hand
writing, to several Nebraska experts, and his
suspicions were confirmed. Then followed the
collection of documentary evidence and the
trip of Father Dooney to warn Mr. Parnell.
Egan says that the idea of allowing all Irish
societies who pay the per capita assessments
representation in the Philadelphia convention
was adopted to raise more money and to drown
the cry that the convention would be In the
hands of any clique. Nevertheless, the League
would still be the dominant power in Irish
affairs In America.
MRS. CLEVELAND'S FIEST L0TE.
An Actor Says He Was Once Engaged to
Miss Frances Folsoni.
Detroit, March 1L There was a rumor at
the time of President Cleveland's marriage
that Miss Folsom had been betrothed to a
young man ot her own age and that the en
gagement had been suddenly broken off. Ed
ward Bell, the actor, is now said to have been
the man who was ousted from the young lady's
affections by Mr. Cleveland. The actor left
his dressing room last night after the per
formance of "Fasclnation,''in wich he is sup
porting Cora Tanner.
"Yes," said he, "it is true that I was once en
gaged to Miss Folsom. It Is a fact I have
wished little to be said about it, as it is rather
personal, but there are a great many stories
about it that are not true."
"How did the engagement come to be
Mr. Bell answered this question with a glance
that meant Mr. Bell himself had a great deal
to do with the breaking off of the engagement
and that he did his part first.
"I left my home soon after the affair," said
he, "and went to New York, with the idea of
following the stage. J have been acting now
for about two years. I think I should be con
tent, for I never made any great effort to pre
vent the change that occurred a few vears ago.
Since those days, when Miss Folsom and Xtook
the leading roles in amateur theatricals, she
has been the leading lady of the land, and
I have acted the bold hero of a love story my
self." THOMAS JEFFERSON'S BUST.
Tho First Statue of a Vice President to Adorn
tho Senate Chamber.
Washington, March 1L Several years ago
the Senate by resolution authorized the pur
chase of busts of all the Vice Presidents of the
United States who have presided over tbe
United States Senate since tbe foundation of
the Government These busts were to be
placed in the various niches in and about the
Senate chamber. There were three Vice Pres
idents Jiving at that time Hamlin. Wheeler
and Arthur, and steps were immediately taken
to secure busts while they yet lived. At the
same time contracts were entered into for the
purchase of busts of the earlier Vice Presi
dents. The first to come to band is that of Thomas
Jefferson. This was received at tbe capital a
few days ago. It is made of white marble and
is of heroic size. The exact location has not
yet been determined upon.
INSISTS UPON HIS RIGHTS.
General Bntler Gets 83 for Damage Dons
to His Glass Plot by Militia.
Special Telegram to The Dispatch.
Washington, March 1L General Benja
min F. Bntler is a man of rigid business, and
insists upon what he thinks is due him from a
business standpoint to the turning of a hair.
This is well illustrated to-day by his action in
sending in to the Inaugural Committee a bill
for $3 for damage to the sodding In front of his
mansion near the Capitol, through it being
trampled upon by the militia. The bill was
paid. The entire damage to the Pension build
ing, where the great ball was held, was only $21
The Townshend Obsequies Postponed.
Washington, March H. Owing to the ill
ness of Mrs. Townshend and her daughters, it
ha3 been determined to postpone for the pres
ent the taking of the remains of Representative
Townshend to Illinois. The funeral will take
place in this city to-morrow morning, at 10
o'clock, and the remains will be deposited in a
vault in one of the cemeteries of the city.
' ' Paris Going Mad.
From the London Globe.
What with Boulangcr, the Exhibition, the
Ministerial crisis and the inundations, Paris is
going quite mad. It is partly in Seine al
ready. . In a Prohibition State.
From the Portland (Me.) Press. J
How many times is a man to be allowed to
have his physician's prescription refilled under
the apothecary bill? As often as his quart is
CAUGHT ON THE GRIP LINE.
A man stood under an old oak tree
One bright and sonny morn.
And when a pain shot through his foot
He stooped and found a corn.
Andy It Is very evident that Mr. Harrison
don't intend to give his personal attention to the
management ef the affairs ofthe country.
Andy Because he has chosen a Proctor.
You can tell if a woman has seen little Lord
Fauntleroy by the way she dresses her small boy?
Kid McKee Grandpap, I wish you would get
Uncle Knssell to give you that hand painted bat
he won on your election.
President H. Why so, cnte one?
Kid McKee Because when I run for the Presi
dency I want my grandfather's bat to be a dandy;
Margy Mr. Slowboy, the poet called on me
Dargy How did you like him? (
Margy Very well, Indeed; but I don't think he
wlli ever call again.
DargTr-Wby, did you Insult him?
Margy-Won't think I did. You know, he said
he 'was going to adopt a nom de plume, and he
asked me to suggest something.
Dargy Well, did you do it?
Margy Yes; I suggested Hoosae Tunnel.
Dargy And why such a name as that?
Margy Because It's the biggest bore In the
What shall we call the baby, John?
I don't like the family name; Blssell,
- Well, then, my dear, don't call him. at all; v
VI think he will come If we whistle. .''
.,& C'Sr C.2
' ' cdkiods'condensAtiobs. ,
There are 14 Indians in the Karuaa
A cat 19 years old is la be seen in tha
family of N. B. Shaw, Acra, Green county,
A farmer living near Attica, Kan.,
will cultivate 70 acres of watermelons on his
farm this year.
J. H. Bowman cangbt a tfe- eagle ia
Oklahoma March 4. He picked outthe largest
quill. 18 inches long, fashioned It into a pea
and sent it to the President
Peach stones find ready sale at $6 per
ton In Vaca Valley, Cat- They are used m
fuel, "burning as long as coal and giving; mora
heat" Apricot stones are also burned.
A well 60 feet deep is not a pleasant
place to spend one's time In. "Vio Harris, ol
Federal, Kan., will testify to this, having fallen
Into one last week, 'and remained there from
noon Until midnight
The historio old town of Litchfield,
Masi, intends to preserve Its antique flavor
by the introduction of the old English custom
ot market day once a week. The first ona
has already been observed and proved a great
Miss Mildred Maddox, of Brewton,
Ala dressed up as a tramp and attempted to
frighten her mother. The disguise was per
fect, and Mrs, Maddox emptiedthe contents of
a shotgun into her daughter's body. The girl
will recover. , .
Trades people and shopkeepers in Bus
sian Poland are being compelled to sign an
agreement not to use the Polish language
among themselves or to customers. For, the
first breaking of the agreement they are fined,
and if they break it twice their shops are closed
by the police.
Mrs. TvW. Corbettwent to the rescue
of a young mocking bird in a cage upon her
back piazza at St Augustine, Fla.. the other
day. A small hawk had him by the wing en
deavoring to pull him through the wires, while
tbe young bird braced himself in opposition
and lustily squeaked.
In a store in Perry, Ga., there are soma
young Irish potatoes, about the size of a com
mon acorn, that have grown this season In the
barrel in which the seed potatoes were
shipped. There is no semblance oi bush, but
the young potatoes have simply grown out
from the old potatoes.
At the sale of Mrs. Jameson's collection
of colonial and revolutionary documents In
Boston a day or so ago the signatures of Ethan
Allen, John Qnlncy Adams and Benedict Ar
nold brought $25 each. A proclamation for
Thanksgiving Day issued by President Wash
ington was sold for $109.
A gentleman living at Marietta, Ga.,
is thoroughly temperate as to ardent spirits,
but never drinks anv water. He confines him
self to milk and coffee, and seems to enjoy as
much health as the usual run of mankind. He
says he has no particular aversion to water,
but has no desire to drink it
Two colored men were seated in front of
a colored saloon fronting the bay at St August
ine, Fla., recently. One held In hi3 hand a re
volver they bad been examining, wben by some
careless movement It Was discharged. The ball
passed through the other hand of the owner
and both hands of his companion.
The Philadelphia and Beading Bail
road Company is. about to adopt the Pennsyl
vania Company's system of having one kind of
whl3tle for passenger locomotives, and another
style tor freight engines. This win enable sta
tion operators, switch tenders,and signal tower
men to know exactly what is approaching.
The electrical apparatus by which
doomed criminals will be put to death in New
York consists of a chair, probably of iron. Tho
current will be sent from arm , to arm of ths
subject or from the head to the spine. The
exact location of the poles will, no donbt, vary
with the subject and the opinion of physicians.
An old negro walked into one of the
stores at .Vienna, La last week and offered
some eggs for sale. The merchant proffered
him 15 cents per dozen for them in trade. The
negro scratched his head a minute, and said:
"Boss, dem white folks dun tola me not
to take lessen 12 cents far dese yere eggs,
and I 'spects I better take 'em back home."
A citizen of Marietta, Ga., who does
business in Atlanta, comes home nearly every
'day and returns. He has a dog that is a great
pet During the week days that dog never at
tempts to follow him from the house. On Sun
day the dog seems to know that tbe Sabbath
day has arrived, wben Its master will remain
at home, and he no sooner starts to the square
than the doe follows close at his heels, and re
mains with him all day.
There's a gander in Coweta county, '
Georgia, that has recently been bereft" of its
mate. He has since taken up with a rooster
and is trying to learn how to crow, but so far
without s'uecess. When tbe rooster flaps his
wings to crow the gander does likewise, and
stretches his neck in a vain effort to Imitate
the music of the chanticleer. He tries hard to
fly up on the roost and is very affectionate In
his attentions to the rooster.
At Albany, Ga., the other night during;
the prevalence of an unusually severe rain
storm, a prominent gentleman had a most
thrilling experience. He was passing through
his dining room on the way to the pantry when
he saw a figure standing before him. Ha
thought it was his daughter, and spoke to her.
The figure made no reply, but moved slowly
along. He could hear tne rustling of her gar
ments, and feeling certain that it was his
daughter, he continued to converse, with her,
calling her by name. The female went ahead
of him to the pantry. Surprised by her silence
as he reached the pantry, be put out his hand
to touch her, when to his nnspeakable horror
tbe figure instantly vanished. There was no
way of egress by which the strange visitor
could have escaped. The gentleman fell to tha
floor with fright and his hair literally stood on
end. He is certain that he had a vision of a
visitor from tha world of spirits. His daugh
ter, who was in the parlor, hearing his voice,
called to kim to know If he had called her.
She had nqt been in the room.
CLIPPED BITS OF" WIT.
It isn't easy to write poetry, but it is a
good deal easier than It Is to stop some people
from trying to.
It is not true that Anthony Comstock has
ordered the hoops of the barrel worn Inside.
It isn't always the man who wears the
largest hat who knows the most bot generally he
he Is the man who thinks he daet.SomercilU
Most hermits lead their lives of loneliness
because they were disappointed lnIove. Those
of us who have seen-them think it no wonder that
Amateur (showing his wife about tha
studio.) That is my last picture.
Fond wife Ah I If 1 were only sure ofjt ifar
IN A NUT STTTXT,
Chicago girls always learn easily to walk
on snow shoes. This may be because they ara
exceptionally bright, or It may be due to tbelr re
markable understanding. ,
"I don't care very much for the frieze,
but I'd Hie a dago. What have you In the way of
And the wall-paper man went Into the back
room and had a At. Harper') Bazar.
Mrs. Thompson (to new maid.) Bridget,
you did not put quite enough tea In the pot this
cup of teals very weak.
Bridget Indade, mum. faith and Oi did pnt
moTe'n enough tay lu the pot but Oi think Ol
must av puts little too much wather In ft. .Har
Young lady (to turnkey). Can I taka
these flowers to the prisoners, sir?
Turnkey Yes, mem, the thieves and pick
pockets '11 be glad to get'em. They dotes on
flowers. But there ain't no murderers in now,
mem. The last one waspardoned out yesterday.
Young Lady Oh, I am so sorry. Ttie Epoch.
. NOT SO MAD AFTER AXXt
iPhysician Your husband is quite deliri
ous and seems utterly out of his mind. 'Has he '
recognized any one to-day? ,
Wife Oh. ves. He called me a dragon.thls
morning, and be constantly speaks of (he govern
ess as an angel. Boitoa Beacon. , ,'
Dude (entering Delmonico's, to waiter;
the dude carries a heavy stick with an enormous
horse's head. -Hat waiter. -J
Walter Yes, sir. j
wuue irfKtt, waiter,
Walter Yes sir.
Dude Cane, waiter.
Walter-Yes, sir. Have It blanketed, slr?-i(.
TJNDULT SENSITIVE. 2&'
The humorist bought a type writing machine
To save wear and tear on his thumb, - (Yi
To writ all bis Jokes to the "cllck-cHek-elleks"
That e'er with the typewriter come.
Bnt the very ors Joke thlt he wrote was about
Old Saturn being ruled by a ring.
And he got very mad and smashed his machine
'When it said as he finished "Tlng-tlng."
Whence It Is to be seen that the proverb of eld
. Throagh the ages has not been a loser '
In the matter of truth with which it Is fraughti
- Guilty conscience needs ne'er an aecuserjist
-CarlyU SmWt, in Mtuytr't Xuar,
fA. .' i' v- tc&
4 SMk.5?', .. . 41
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