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title: 'The Bloomfield times. (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, April 05, 1870, Page 2, Image 2',
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Cljc imc0, New Bloomficft, Ja
Thcro was a little convulsive sympathy
then, but it was too Into. There was;
however, one beautiful ray of brightness
that streamed out over his darkened life.
Floy Austin had been truo to her love for
him, though her father had forbidden her
to sco him after his arrest. But when the
story that ho was dying, came to her cars,
she threw nsido all parental control, nnd
came to him, and insisted upon being his
wife immediately. Ho objected faintly,
but the thought of having her with him
to the end, and of calling her at last, by
the sweet name of wife, was too pleasant
to bo long resisted, and so in the solemn
shadow of death they were united in wed
lock, and her hands ministered to his last
earthly wants, and her loving faithfulness
brightened the valley of shadows.
And so Robert Sherwood was dead
dead in the flush of bis young man
hood. If ho erred and fell in that one
terrible moment of bilter temptation,
were they f(uito guiltless who barred the
way of his return to honor, and virtue,
and usefulness 1
After llobcrt's death, Alfred Lindscy
came up and took Mr. and Mrs. .Slier
wood and Corralina down to Windsor
Locks. He knew how desolate and ter
rible the old place must seem to them
now, and ho promised Ilobert to make
their grief as easy for them to bear as
possible. Grantley people talked about it
some, and wondered "'why ho didn't mar
ry Corrie and bo done with it it would
certainly look better."
But one, two, threo years went by, and
both Alfred and Corrie kept on in the
even tenor of their way. There was
nothing heard of marriage between them,
but that a deep, and tender, and earnest
affection existed between tbeni, no one
could doubt who know them. Homo peo
ple, not understanding pure nnd tender
feeling, laughed, and made sneering re
marks and innuendoes, but the poisonous
arrows glanced off harmless from their
strong armor of purity. But there came
a change at last ; a change that released
Kindsoy from the self-imposed life of la
bor and sacrifice in their behalf. Corrie
Sherwood, quite unexpectedly to most
people, though not to Alfred , married a
wealthy gentleman in Harford, who at
once took her parents home to bis house.
The day after they left, Lindscy went up
to Grantley. Ho had scarcely been there
since Ilobert Sherwood died. There
were reasons why he dared not trust him
self to go there much.
Annie Morrison, a little paler and
graver than on that autumn morning
when she had ridden from Hartford to
( Jrantlcy with Alfred Lindscy, sat lost in
thought before a light (ire that flickered
through the twilight shadows of a gray
October evening. A low rap sounded on
the door. Of course it was her father,
she was expecting him momently; so she
said, with a little low laugh :
" Come in, if it is anybody that loves
The door opened and a gentleman
came forward, pausing whero the light
fell across his face.
" Addic," he said, tenderly, " I could
uot stay outside when you said hat."
Of course sho give a little feminine
tart and scream, and protested against
his taking her so literally, because, of
course, sho was only in fun, besides, she
was so sure it was her father. But when
ho told her in earnest, passionato words
of his love for her all these years, and
how ho had not dared to como to her be
fore, lest her sweet face should make him
forget the path of duty he had marked
out for himself; and that no'w the bur
den was off his hands, and ho was free to
suck his own happiness, etc., etc., why,
she quite broke down, and admitted be
tween little happy, hysterical sobs, that
"who had loved him always;" and when
a little later Mr. Morrison really camo in,
ho found his little girl the betrothed wife
of Alfred Liudsey, and like a model fath
er, added the parental blessing.
fl3rIn a Western Sabbath-school, a
boy was asked to give an account of Mo
ses, " Moses," said the boy, " was born
on the banks of the Nile in a basket. As
the infant lay in the basket, concealed in
the bushes, a huge crocodile came swim
niing along, and approaching him, said :
' Moses, almost thou porsuadost mo to bo
a Christian.' Whereupon the infant
stretched out its little arm toward the
orocodile, and said: Verily thou art the
ST An orator, who had raised hi3 au
dience to a great hoight by his lofty soar
ings cxoluiiuod : " I will now close in the
.beautiful and expressive languago of the
poet t forget his name -and and I
. lbrget what ho said, too,"
THE IRISHMAN'S WILL.
T was a little' after midnight that a
knock camo to the door of the cabin.
1 heard it at first, for I used to sleep ia a
little snug basket near the fire ; but I
didn't speak, for I was frightened. It
was still repeated louder, and then came
a cry : " Con Cregan ; Con, I say; open
the door I I want you." I knew the
voice well ; it was L'eter McCubc's'; but
I pretended to be fast asleep, and snored
loudly. At hist my father unbelted the
door, and I heard him say, " (), Mr. Met
er, what's the matter; is tho old man
" Faix that's what he is ; for he is
" Glory bo his bed ! when did it hap
" About an hour ago," said l'eter, in a
voice that even 1 from my corner, could
perceive was greatly agitated. " He died
like an old hathen, Con, and never made
a will !"
" That's bad," said my father, " for he
was a polite man, and said whatever was
pleasing to the company."
" It is bad," said l'eter. " but it would
be worse if be couldn't help it. Listen
to me now, Corney ; I want ye to help me
in this business ; and hero are five iruin
eas in gold if ye do what I bid ye. Von
know that ye were always reckoned the
image of my father, and before ho took
ill ye were mistaken for each other every
day of tho week."
" Anan !'' said my father ; for he was
getting frightened at the notion, without
Well knowing why.
" Well, what 1 want is for ye to come
over into the house and get into bed."
" Not beside the corpse ?" said my fath
" By no moans, but by yourself; and
you're to pretend to be my father, and
that ye want to make yor will before ye
die ; and then I'll send for the neighbor.;,
and Billy Scnuhm tho school-master, and
yo'll toll him what to write, leaving all
the farm and everything to me yc under
stand. And as the neighbors will see ye
and hear yer voice, it will never bo be
lieved but it was himself that did it."
" The room must bo very dark," says
" To bo sure it will ; but have no fear.
Nobody will dare to come nigh tho bed,
and yo'll only have to make a cross wilh
yer pen under the name.
" And tho priest?" said my father.
My father quarreled with him last
week about the Easter dues ; and Father
Tom said he'd uot give him the rites ;
and that's lucky now. Come along, now,
quick, for we've no time to lose; it must
be all finished before daybreak. "
My father did not lose much timo at
his toilet, for ho just wrapped his big
coat round him, and slipping on the
brogues, left tho house. 1 sat up in the
basket, anil listened till they were gone
some minutes; and then in a costume as
light as my parent's, set out after them to
watch the course of the adventure. I
thought to take a short cut and be there
before them ; but by bad luck I fell into
a bog-hole, and only escaped drowning by
a chance. As it was, when I reached the
house the performance had already bo
gun. I think I see the whole sceno this in
stant before my eyes as I sat on a little
window with ono pane, and that a broken
one, and surveyed tho proceedings. It
was a large room, at ono end of which
was a bed, and beside it was a table with
physic bottles, and spoons and teacups; a
little further off was a table, at which sat
Billy Scanlan, with all manner of writing
materials before him.
The country people sat two nnd some
times threo deep round the walis, all in
tently eager and anxious for the coming
event; l'eter himself went from place to
place trying to smother his grief, nnd oc
casionally helping the company to whisky
which was supplied with more than ac
All my consciousness of tho deceit nnd
trickery would not deprive the sccno of a
certain solemnity. The misty distance of
tho half-lighted room ; the highly-wrought
expression of the country people's faces,
never more intensely excited than at
somo moment of this kind; the low, deep
drawn breathings, unbroken by a sigh or,
a sob; tho tribute of afi'ectionato sorrow
to some lost friend, whoso memory was
thus forcibly brought back ; theso wero
all s) real that, as I looked, a thrilling
senso of awo stole over me, and I actually
shook with fear.
A low faint cough from tho dark corn
er where tho bed stood seemed to cause
even a deeper stillness; and then, in a
silenco whero tho bussing of a fly would
have been heard, my father said :
" Where's Billy Scanlan ? I waut to
make my will."
" He's hero, father," said refer, taking
Billy by the hand, und leading him to
" Write what I bid ye, Billy, and be
quick for 1 havn't a long time before me
here. 1 die a good Catholic, although
Father O'llaflerty won't give me tliogen
A general chorus of in uttered " () 1
musha, musha!'' was now heard through
the room ; but whether in grief over the
s;id fate of the dying man, or the un
flinching severity of the priest, is hard to
'' I die in peace with nil my neighbois
and nil m-Mikim!.''
Another chorus of the company seem
ed to approve their characteristic expres
sions. " 1 bequeath unto iry son l'eter and
never was there a belter son, or a (lucent
er ! have you that down ? I bequeath
to my s;ii i'eter the whole of my two
farms of KiHiinundoonery and Knock-i-iicboora.
with tin; fallow meadows be
hind lynche's house, the forge ami right
of turf on the Door.in bog. 1 give him
and much good may il do him hanty
i a-sara s aer.!, ami
the huar v liel
tiie lime kiln ; and that reminds me
my mouth is just ai dry. Li t mo taste
what ye have hi the jug " Here tho dy
ing lii-ip to-'k very hoaity pull. nnddm
e.l considerably refreshed by it.
" Whore was I, Billy Scanlan?" says
he ; " O, i remember it was at. tho lime
kiln. I leave him that's I'eter. I mean
the two potato ixardeiis at Noonan's
Well; and it is the clegmt crops that
" Ain't you getting weak, father dar
in?" says I'eter, who began to be afraid
of my father's loquaciousness; for, to say
the truth, the punch got into his head,
and he was greatly disposed to talk.
'' 1 am I'eter. my son," says he; " I
am getting weaker; just touch my lips
agin with the jug. Ah! l'eter, i'eter,
you watered (he drink."
" No, indeed, father, but it's tho taste
is leaviu' you," says l'eter; and again a
low chorus of compassionate pity inur
niuied thro'igh the cabin.
" Well, I'm nearly done, now says my
father ; " there's only one plot of groun I
remaining, and 1 put it on you I'eter as
ye wish to live a good num. and die with
tho same easy heart as I do now that ye
mind my last words to ye here. Are ye
listening? are tho neighbors listening?
is Billy Scanlan listening?"
" Yes, sir, yes, father, we're all mind
ing," chorused the audience.
" Well, then, it's my last will and test
ament, nnd may give me tho jug;" and
here he took a long drink "und may
that blessed liquor bo poisoned to me if
I'm not us eager about this as every
part of tho will; I say, then, I bequeath
the little plot at the cross roads to poor
Con Cregan, for ho has a heavy charge,
and is an honest and as hard-working a
man as I ever knew. Be a friend to him,
l'eter dear; never let him want while ye
have it yourself think of nic on my
deathbed whenever he asks ye for any
trifle. Is it down, Billy Scanlan? the
two acres at the cross roads to Con Cre
gan and his heirs in srcla xcchriml Ah,
blessed be tho saints ! but I feel my heart
lighter after that," says ho " a good
work makes au easy conscience. And
now I'll drink nil the company's good
health, and many happy returns "
What he was going to add there's no
saying; but l'eter who was now terribly
frightened at the lively tone the sick man
was assuming, hurried all tho people into
another room to let his father die in
When they were all gono Peter slipped
back to my father, who was putting on
his brogues in a corner, " Con," says he,
liyo did it all wcllj but sure that was a
joke about tho two acres at tho cross
" Of course it was, 1'ctcr," says ho,
" suro it was nil a joke, for tho matter of
that. Won't I make tho neighbors laugh
hearty to-morrow when I tell them all
" You won't be mean enough to betray
me '!" says l'eter, trembling with fright.
"Suro ye wouldn't bo mean enough to
go against yer father's dying words?"
says my father; "tho last scntenco he
ever spoke ; and hero ho gavo a low,
wicked laugh, that made myself shake
" Very well, Con !" said Peter holding
out bis hand ; " a bargain's a bargain ,
yer a deep fellow, that's all." And so it
ended, and my father slipped over the
bog, mighty well satisfied with tho legacy
ho had left himself.
And thus we became tne owners of the
littlo spot known to this day a3 Cou's Aero.
rinWO Yunkecs were strolling in tho
B woods without any arms in their
possession, and observing a bear ascend
ing a tree, with its paws clasped around
the trunk, ono of them ran forward and
caught the bear's paws, one in each hand.
Ho instantly called out to his comrade :
"Jonathan, I say, go home and bring
me something as fast us you can, till 1
kill tho varmint. Mind don't stay, for
I'm in a fix."
Jonathan ran off us fast ns he could,
but was an exceedingly long time return
ing. Muring the interval the bear made
several desperate attempts to bite the
hands of him who held it. At length
Jonathan camo back.
" Hallo, Jonathan, what tho deuce has
kept you ?"
Jonathan replied: " Well, I'll tell you.
When at home breakfast was about ready,
and I guessed it would be as well to wait
" Here, now, Jonathan," said his
comrade, "you come and hold it, and I'll
kill tho critter in a j iffy."
Jonathan seized tho bear's paws, and
held the uuinial while the other could
" Well, Jonathan, have you got hold of
" Yes," said Jonathan.
"Very well, hold him fast; I guess I'll
go to dinner."
A Poor Place.
A MEMBER of the far-famed Qua
J dang Club tho Historical and Pis
catorial Society of Westchester County
tells of a curious funeral custom in one
of tho Long Island agricultural districts,
a district retuarkaklo for its fertility in
clams and bluefish. lie says that a few
years ago he went down on tho island
with a view of purchasing a farm which
he had seen avcrtised for sale, lie spout
several days in the village ; his inquiries
as to the value of tho farm were satisfac
torily and assuringly answered, and he
finally had the honor to ' assist' at a fu
neral, lie noticed in the funeral proces
sion a heavy cait drawn by oxen, and the
cart was filled with guano. He was sur
prised to see tho contents of the vehicle
deliberately emptied into tho grave before
the earth was thrown in. Upon inquiry
of the minister he ascertained that this
custom was in accordance with an old tra
diton of the farmers on that part of Long
Island, who believed the soil was so poor
and thin as to require a fertilizer to in
sure the resurrection of any thing buried
in it except ihimx '
Our correspondent didn't buy that,
farm on Long Island, but eventually set
tled in ono of tho fevcr-and-aguo districts
of Westchester County, where they have
a curious funeral observance of their own,
and where most of tho people die of fe
ver and ague. At the funerals the
mourners uniformly sprinkle quinine on
the graves of tho deceased to prevent
their being prematurely shaken out!
What She Thought.
In the county parish in Scotland the
minister and the ruling elder went over
the muir to visit an old parishioner on a
catechising visit, and the walk being a
long ono their appetites wero pretty keen
when they arrived. Before commencing
the serious business they suggested that
the inner man was clamorous. Janet ac
cordingly went to the press and placed on
tho table country refreshment, bread,
milk, etc , and seating herself ut a little
distance, requested tho visitors to fall to.
They soon cleared tho board, and the
minister remarked : " Mow, Janet, we'll
begin the serious business. Do you remem
ber the text last Sunday, Janet?"
" 'Deed I do," replied Janet, " I mind
it well ; it was the miriclo of the loaves
"And have yo pondered tho subject
during tho week ?"
" 'Deed I have, and I'm thinking the
noo that gin you and tho elder had been
there they wad uae hao taken up sae ma
&8T A young lady went into a music
store in lloyul street, recently, and asked
tho shop man for " 'Thy hand, my charm
ing Willie," (a popular ballad so called.)
" I beg your pardon, madam," said the
confused seller of crochets, who is a green
ono by tho way " My namo ain't Willie,
but Ilobert, they calls mo Bob for short;
besides, I's engaged to Lucinda Jenkins,
and can't give to no ono else my hand."
The lady of courso put down tho 6cllor
of sharps for a perfect flat.
t&" Men of means are often tho mean
est of men.
A Racy Incident.
QOON AFTER tho opening of tho
k) East Tennessee nnd Georgia Railroad
there chanced to be traveling over the
line, in a car where there were but a few
passengers, a gentleman who was seated
opposite tho stove, wrapped up in his
shawl and meditations. Night came on.
Presently in bounded a brnkoiiian.
loudly slamming the door behind him
-one of those country geniuses who,
with a laudable ambition, had a day or
two ngone abandoned tho girls, the fid
dle and tho plowtail, to climb "in tho
world," and became a braketnan. Ho
had been the king-bee, ut nil the neigh
borhood frolics, at the house raising,' at
the com shuckings, und at the cross
road's doggery lighting ground, and
now ho felt sure that he was king-bee
on railroads. Strutting up to tho '"stove
he sk inned down his lantern, kicked the
mud from his huge boots en tho foot
I. 1. , ., '.. . . ,
u.miii vi mu Mill, (-pu tOhaCC'O 111C0
copiously and noi.-ily on the hissing stove,
crossed his muscular thighs, tor k a sur
vey of the aforesaid boots with hurncst
leather straps, and then bethought him
self of the "customer" sitting opposite,
on whom ho proceeded to be.-tow a lengtl -enedand
sausy look, as though he doubt
ed tho " customer's" right to bo in the
coach at all.
At length ho sought knowledge.
" Whar ar you guine, mister?"
" To Dalton, sir," responded the gen
" Preacher ain't you ?"
" No sir, I am not : but why do you
ask ?" J
" Oh ! nothing, only I thought I saw
' Hark from the Tombs' sticking out all
over you, like tl.e measles. You know
me, I reckon ?"
" I am sorry to say that I do not."
" Well, I'll jistbe darned; why, whar
tho devil were you raised?"
" At Maryville, East Tennessee."
"Oh ! that excuses you, for if ever T
beam tell ov that settlement afore, I
wish I may be durned, and I knows
every place, I dus."
" You seem to be well acquainted with
tho place you are now occupying," re
marked the stranger, almost choking with
efforts to suppress his laughter.
" What place do you mean, mister?
This ere red bainch, covered with dried
skins of cows' toungs, or my ofticr!"
" I alluded to your office, and by tho
way, what is your position on this road ?"
"Brakeman, by tho jumping giuiimy.
I thought ev.ry body knowed that ; brake
men over the Yeast Tenncssey and Geor
" Unfortunately, I did not know it."
" Well, you'd soon found the fact out
if you'd cut up any shines roun', or try
ing to steal any bod's carpet-bag, or talk
ing to the conductor, or sich. Why, I'd
a chucked you a bottom foremos' through
that winder, like dartin' clapboards thru
the crack ov a barn. I mean to run this
train on high moral principles, I dus.
An' you didn't know I was the brakeman
on this yero railroad ?"
" Indeed, sir, I did not."
" Well, old Slideeasy, all I has got to
say is that for a man of your looks you
know less than any man I ever saw.
How do you manage to make a living ?"
I receive a salary ; lam President of
this road ; Wallace is my name, but I
have not tho pleasuro of knowing yours;
will you bo kind enough to infer in me ?"
" All symptoms of ' king bee" disap
peared at this thunderbolt announcement,
and in the ,-tead were seen timid humani
ty, crushed pride of place a strong " git-np-aiid-git"
expression, und a most con
founded hang-dog, " done up" nnd " dog
goned" appearance generally. Tho brake
CQf Thirty thousand enterprising
young gentlemen in Ohio, last year prom
ised to love, honor, arid buy " things" for
thirty thousand bright-eyed dames and
damsels ; and tho thirty thousand dames
and damsels blushed and whimpered, and
said they " never could go through tho
ceremony in tho world," and then very
quietly accepted their destiny, and ou
tho whole, rather liked it.
JGfiy Convisart, a French physician of
some celebrity, during tho latter portion
of the last century, was once lamenting
the prematuro death of Dr. Baker. "It
was not, at nil events, for want of medical
aid that ho died," said ho, "for in tho
last days of illness, we, Halle, Porter and
myself, did not quit him for an instant.'
" Alas !" intsrraptod tho Abbo Steyo?,
' what could ho do against threo of you ?"
JCSy A wife's sour face is good for tho