Newspaper Page Text
How is Your Blood?
If it is poor and thin and lacking in tho
number and quality of those red corpuscles,
you are in danger of sickness from disease
germs and the enervating effect of warm
weather. Purify your blood with
. The great blood purifler which bas proved
its merit by a record of cures unequalled in
medical history. With pure, rich blood you
will be well and strong. Do not negloot this
important matter but take Hood's Sarsapar
illa now. Be sure to get Hood's.
ISAA*!'* DMIfik RRE lasteless, mild, eff"C
nOQQ S ri?g tlve. All druggists. Sc.
Kew Substituto for Butter.
The latest substitute for butter is
said to be a product made from pe
troleum, but by what name it is to
be known we have not learned. Petro
leum is put to many uses, and in the
exhibit at the "World's fair there were
over eighty different oils made from it
including "imported pure olive." It
is all right to use science in as many
ways as possible in the aid of humani
ty, but it is entirely wrong to put
fraudulent products on the market and
call them genuine. If wo are to have
a new substitute for butter let it be
called by some different name.
"Well," said tho man who fixes up
tho weather bulletin, "there's ono
thiner to be said to my credit anyhow."
"What is that?" inquired the assist
"My reports haven't been dry read
ing for a long time."-Washington
Tho following notice is posted con
spicuously in a newspaper office out
west : "Shut the door ; and ns soon as
you have done talking business, serve
your mouth the same way."
"Brilliant and impulsive people,"
declares a lecturer on physiognomy,
"have black eyes; or, if they don't
have them, they aro apt to get them if
they are too impulsive."
THE waters of North America, which
means tho Gulf of Mexico, the two
great oceans and the rivers, creeks and
lakes, are stocked with 1800 different
varieties of fish. Of tho above num
ber five hundred aro peculiar to the sea
and about six hundred to tho rivers,
creeks and lakes.
The Miran gelt Men Crow Weak
Sometimes. The short cut to renewed vigor
is taken by those sensible enough to uso Hos
tctter's Stomach Bitters sysUmatica'.iy. It
Te-es:ablbhes impaired digestion, enables tbe
system to assimilate food, and combines the
qualities of a fine medicinal stimulant with
iiiose of a sovereign preventive remedy. Ma
laria, dyspepsia, constipation, rheumatic,
nervous and kidney complaints aro cured
and averted by it.
A Baltimore drngei-t puts this sign upon
his broken window: "This window was broken
by a horr-e in a ma 1 rush for one of our sodas."
Dr.Kilmer's SWAMP-ROOT caret
ail Kidney and Bladder troubles.
Pamphlet and Consultation free.
Laboratory Binghamton. N. X.
An Abbeville, X. C., paper makestbcmitque
claim to "more reders for least circulation of
any p.iper in thc United Slate)."
Change ot" Lite.
When a woman approaches the change of
life she is liable to have a return of all the
menstrual derangements, and oiher adments
tba' afflicted her in former years. Thc direct
a-tion of McElrce's Wino of Cardui on the
organs afflicted, make it tho best remedy for
usc during this period.
Mrs. D. Pennington, West Plain?, Mo., says:
"I had been suffering from chango of life and
it lo k the form of drop-y. The doctora told
my husband it was useless to prescribo for me
e.r.? nitwr.- About that timo we get Dr. McEl
ree's book oa the treatment of femalo diseases
and decided 'o try the Wine of Cardui Treat
ment. After using nine bot tles, I am well."
Indigestion, Dyspepsia, Bad Breath, DebUIty,
Sour Stomach, Want of Appetite, Distress
After Eating, and all evils arising from a
weak or disordered stomach. It builds up
from tho ?r>t dose, and a bottle or two will
cure tho worst oases, and insure a good appe
tite. excellent digestion aud result in vigor
ous bea.th and buoyancy of spirits. There is
no latter way to insure good health and a
long Ufe than to keep the stomach rizht.
Tyner's Dyspepsia Remedy is guaranteed to
do this. Tao Tranquilizing Atter-Dinner
Drink. For sale by Druggists. Manufactured
by C. 0. Tyner, Atlanta.
.F. S. Parker, Ff donia. N. Y., says: "Shall
not call on yon for tlie $100 rowar.i, for I be
lieve Hall's Catarrh Cure will cure any case of
c itarrh. Wa? very bad." Write bim for par
ticulars. Sold by Druggists, 73c.
Experience Leads .Hauy Mothers to Say
"UscParker's Ginzer Tonio" because it is good
for colds, pain and almost every weakness.
Pisa's Cur . i- a wonderful Cough medicine.
-Mr?. \V. PlCKJCRX. Van Sielen and Blako
Aves.. Brooklyn, X. \.. Oct. L'C. '94.
Both the method and results when
Syrup of Figs is taken; it ia pleasant
and refreshing to the ta?te, and acts
gently yet promptly on the Kidneys,
Liver and Bowels, cleanses the sys
tem effectually, dispels colds, head
aches and fevers and cures habitual
constipation. Syrup of Figs is tho
only remedy of its kind ever pro
duce!., pleasing to the tasto and ac
ceptable to the stomach, prompt in
its action and truly beneficial in its
effects, prepared only from the most
healthy and agreeable substances, its
many excellent qualities commend it
to all and have mado it the most
popular remedy known.
Syrup of Figs is for sale in 50
cent bottles by all leading drug
gists. Any reliable druggist who
may not have it on hand will pro
cure it promptly for any one who
wishes to try it. Bo not accept any
CALIFORNIA FIG SYRUP CO.
SAN FRANCISCO, CAL.
LOUISVILLE. KY. 11EVJ YORK. N Y.
? HIGHEST AWARD*
? THE BEST ?
jir_JOHN CARLS <? SONS, New York. *
1 ?5n?S V.'?tKi Ali EISE FAILS. Lg
Bert COORD s jr rup. TfttfuOood. UBCE|
THE SONG AND THE SIGH,
When bright skies seem far away,
Smilo and think the winter's May;
If the snow falls day and night,
Dream each flake's a rose of whitol
Never mind how dark the sky
It's the song that beats thc sight
As this old world rolls along,
Hear the bells ring! and the song!
Every bird on every tree
Joining in the melody!
Happy as the time rolls by
It's the song that beats tho sigh!
Every garden has its rose;
Every storm a rainbow shows!
When, each day, the sun declines
Star lo star in glory shine?!
Seo the sun-the stars on high
It's the song that beats the sigh!
Still God's heaven greets your sight
In tho darkness there is light.
Every morn the sunlight streams.
And tho dark is sweet with dreams.
Rear the music from on high
It's the song that beats tho sigh!
-E. L. Stanton, in Atlanta Constitution.
ET HELEN FOEREST GRAVES.
HERE : ro six of
u1:.!" said Fenelia
Grey t o n ; "and
nothing to live
around upon the
rest of the Greyton
family with the
tragic air of a
lived in a pretty old manor house on
the Bloomingdale road, just a pleas
ant drive out of town.
They liked pretty draperies, nnd
cultivated rare roses, and painted
lovely little amateur pictures, and
basked, in a sort of unthinking way,
in life's sunshine.
They didn't know quite how much
income they had, nor exactly where it
came from. They only knew that
everything was in the hands of "poor
papa's lawyer-a darling, white
haired old philanthropist, who was
devoted to tho heathen, and who of
ficiated as Secretary to half a dozen
foreign missionary associations. And
whenever they wanted money they
went to him for it.
And one day, when Mrs. Greyton
and her daughter Lilla went to the
city office with a bundlo of unpnid
bills to get Mr. Framingbam to write
a check for them, the door was pad
locked, and a little paper notice "To
Let" was tacked upon it.
Where had Mr. Framingbam gone?
When would he return? Thepublic
was densely ignorant on that subject.
Why had he gone? And in answer
to this question thero was a very uni
versal shrugging of shoulders, and a
whisper about a general "smash-up."
Poor Mrs. Greyton ! She and Lilla
were both as ignorant and inexperi
enced of the world as a pair of white
kittens, and it was some time before
she could comprehend that Mr. Fram
ingham was a thorough faced villain,
and that she and her little flock were
"What shall we do?" murmured
Mrs. Greyton, after she had wept
through her whole supply of pocket
"Couldn't we sell our hand-painted
china?" said Clarice, a swarthy
browed girl of eighteen. "I de
signed every piece myself. And Mr.
"Pshaw!" curtly interrupted Fen
elia. "Just look at the china stores,
crowded full of far finer work. Poor
Clarie ! they wouldn't pay you the
price of the mineral paint it took to
do them for your plaqnes and vases."
"1 eau do art embroidery very nice
ly," suggested Mona, a tall, shy girl
with liquid black eyes, and jetty hair
growing low on her forehead.
"The embroidery market is over
full," said Fenelia, who was the incar
nation of common senso fer the fami
ly. "If you could do housework now.
Mona looked down at her slim,
white hands, all sparkling with rings,
But Bess, the youngest, came bravely
to the rescue.
"The first thing," said she, "is to
send all the servants off except Ann.
We can't afford to pay four girls and
a man any louder."
"But who is to keop the garden in
order," cried Clarie, "if we discharge
"It must go without being kept in
order," said Bess, "or else we must do
"My poor roses !" sighed Mrs. Grey
"Mamma's roses shall not suffer,"
said Lilla. "I will look after them
"And old Mrs. Playford, who spends
a month with us every summer?" said
Mona. "And the Bidgood girls, who
always invite their frienes here to the
midsummer picnics-and all tho peo
ple who drive out from the city to
lunches and teas-"
"We must make a clearance of tho
whole of 'em!" said Fenelia, crisply
"uuless, indeed, they would like to
make a business matter of it and pay
"Oh, Fenelia!" cried Mrs. Grey
"Well, why not, mamma? So far
as I can see, we haven't got money to
buy our own bread and butter-so
how can we afford to order ices, and
frozen puddings, and pates de foie
gras for other people? But if we had
a regular income, I am almost sure,
with Ann's help, that wo could set a
very nice tablo for boarders."
Lilla looked terrified.
"Mamma," said she, "has it come
Bess frowned savagely.
"Lilla," said she, "don't bo a fool!
unless you think you would like to
And while tho family were still in
committee-of-the-who?e, old Mrs.
Pl ay ford's huge, old-fashioned ba
rouche rumbled up to tho door, with
a Leaning Tower of Pisa strapped on
behind in the shape of trunks !
"I'm a little earlier than usual, my
sweet girls," said she, with a smile
that revealed the golden hinges of her
falso teeth after a most ghastly
fashion. "But tho season is in
tolembly hot, and my doctor declares
it would bc suicide for me to remain
longer in town. And I know, darlings,
I'm always sure of a welcomo hore!"
Mrs. Greyton was about to reply,
when Fenelia stepped forward.
"Then you haven't heard of it?"
said she. "Wo are ruined, Mrs. Flay
iord. Old Mr. Framingbam has spent
all our money and gone to Australia.
Wo can't entertain company any lon
ger. But if you would like to board
here, at a reasonable compensation,
we Bhall be glad to receive yon, and
give you all the comforts of a home."
Mrs. Playford's jaw dropped; she
turned a sickly putty oolor.
"John, John?" she cried to the
man; "yon needn't unstrap thc
trunks. I havo so many friends w
are anxious for my society, tl
really I am not at liberty to accc
your very singular proposition"
Fenelia). "Of course" (to Mrs. Ort
ton) "I sympathize deeply with ye
but we ali know that riches ha
wings, and I never did put any cc
fidence in Mr. Framingham as a bu
ness man. So sorry that things shot
have come to such an awkward co
"There she goes-the old hi
ridan!" said Mona, as the wither
hand waved itself from tho carrin
window, half-way down the drr
"Sho has lived upon us for six su
mcrE, and now she wonldn't fling c
of us a penny if we were starving !"
Old Mrs. "Playford was better th
an advertisement in tho newspapc
The Bidgood girls came no more ; t
city people kept sublimoly away. T
old adage concerning the flight of ri
from a falling house carno stricl
"Bosa Bidgood hasn't even coi
after that conserve of rosc-leavee
promised her," said Mona, sad!
"And I gave Ave dollars for the spic
and essential oil. and I dried tho jr
que minot and neil leaves so careful
and Clarie painted such a beautil
butterfly jar for it !"
"Can I have the pot-pourri, Mona
asked Bess, suddenly.
"Yes, if yon want it," answer
Mona, with a shrug of her Bhouldei
"We can't eat nor drink dried ros
"Perhaps wo can,"said Bess to he
And sho rummaged out divers ai
sundry rare old porcelain jars ai
vases from tho family stores, fill
them with the sweet, strangely-seen
ed mass that Mona had concocted, ai
carried them quietly to town.
"It smells exactly liko Mrs. Gre;
ton's drawing-room at the mani
hoii60 here!" exclaimed Ferdinac
Houghton, as ho entered tho studio <
Miss Malvina Morris, a fair feminii
sculptor, who had some very origim
ideas of her own, an 1 was on "hai
fellow-well-met" terms with all th
other artisis of both sexes.
She wa3 neither young nor pretty
yet every one liked Miss Morris.
"Well, I should think it might,
said she. "Do you seo those wine jar
on the shelf?"
"Ot course I do. What aro they?
"They are filled with conserved ros
leaves. Mona Greyton mado then
Bess, the second sister, wants mo t
sell them for her. Beal old porcclai
-leaves full of thc subtlest scents o
Bendemeer. Will you tako ono at te
"Then it's true?" said Houghton.
"About their financial troubles
Unfortunately, yes," said Miss Met
vina. "I only wish I could help them
Come, buy the pot-pourri-there's
good fellow !"
"It's my last ten-dollar bill," sail
Ferdinand, "but here goes! Mon
Greyton is in angel. Do you suppose
Miss Mally, she would accept a poo
artist like me, with no particular in
come and nothing to live on?"
"Try it and see," said Miss Morrie
"But I'm not half good enough fo
"Possibly," acceded Miss Malvina
"But thero aro five girls, you know
and nothing to live on."
So Ferdinand bought the pot-pourri
and rode out at once to the mano
.'Your uncle, sir, wants to soe yoi
np at the house," 6aid the groom whe
led out his little gray nag.
".[ can't 6tay this morning," sah
Houghton. "I'm in a hurry."
"But it's fiomo very particular busi
ness," said the man, running do wi
the pavement after him.
"Oh, hang business!" said Hough
And off lie rode.
Mona was in tho gardon with i
basket, gatheriug moro rose leaves
She thought the pot-pourri questior
Clarice was painting desperately
away at old India ginger jars, up stairs
Fenelia was writing an advertiso
ment, "Boarders Wanted," for thc
"The house is as big as a hotel,'
said she. "Why not make some usc
Mona Greyton listened with smiles
and tears to Ferdinand Houghton'e
"But what could we live upon?'
"Why, I could paint pictures," sail!
this sanguino young wooer. "Pa
guro to sell them at a tearing bij
price as soon as roy name becomes ?
little better known; and I'll have
your mother and all the girls to live
"Oh, Ferdinand !" said Mona, hr 1
laughing, half crying.
And thou tho young artist knevi
that he had not pleaded in vain.
"And it's nil owing to tho pot
pourri," said she, "the bwcet, pootl
"Every bit of it," said Ferdinand.
But his undo listened gravely tc
the tale when the young man came
home, late in tho moonlight, with hie
heart full of love affairs.
"Humph!" said Unelo Barlow^
"How many pictures did you sel!
during the past year?"
"At how much?"
"Seventy-five dollars each," reluc
tantly admitted Ferdinand.
"Humph !" again grunted this re
lentless old Rhadainanthus. "And
you expect to maintain a wife and her
mother and four sisters ou a hundred
and fifty dollars a year?"
"J shall manage to maintain them
in some way way, sir," sail the un
abashed nephew. "There's always tho
Far West, you know."
Unelo Barlow laughed.
"I think we can manage to do bet
ter than that for you, you young
scamp," said he. "If you had turned
back this morning when I sent for you,
instead of psltiug off to tho manor
houso as if it were a question of life or
death, you would havo learned that
old Framingham had been overhauled
in Loudon, cn route for Van Dieman's
Laud, gorged with plunder like an old
"What, sir!" shouted Ferdinand.
"The Greyton's defaulting lawyer?"
"Him?elf and none other," said
Uncle Barlow. "We had a cable tele
gram at ll o'clock. Mrs. Greyton's
money is all safo in the hands of our
Loudon agent. "
"But, eir," gasped Ferdinand,
"how do you como to know this?"
"Old Dorranco Greyton did mo a
favor once, when I was a struggling
man," said Mr. Barlow. "It was not
my intention to stand by and Bee his
widow defrauded without some slight
effort in her behalf. It seems that I
was just in time."
So there was an end of tho Greyton
troubles. They kept tho old manor
house. Ferdinand Houghton set up
his studio there in one of thc firent
north-lighted rooms, and Mrs. Hough
ton makes pot-pourris every year of
And ns fast as tho other girls marry
oft*-which is by no means a slow busi
ness, for they are every one of them
handsome-she gives each a wedding
present of a sweej; conserve of scented
leaves, in an old Oriental jar.
"For pot-pourris are lucky," she
sayB, with the wisest of nods.
WORDS OF WISDOM.
Tho man who hesitates is won.
Do not waste timo over your griev
It always makes a man foel good to
Thc street is fall of humiliations to
the proud. ^
So many people arc actuated hy puro
What wo learn with pleasure we
Somo people do nothing but talk
Patience is the road to advancement
in nil lines of life.
Prosperity is a blessing to tho good,
a curso to the evil.
A small debt produces a debtor ; a
largo ono an enemy.
Many try but few succeed in borrow
ing themselves rich.
Few men aro so clever as to know
all the mischief they do.
A perfectly bright girl can do with
out a light in the parlor.
Nothing is more reasonable and
cheap than good manners.
When the State is most corrupt then
tho laws are most multiplied.
In a great many cases a woman's
faith in a man is a sort of stubborn
When a ?rom?n wants to laugh in
her sleeve eho is not cramped for lack
Clothos do not make tho man, but
they have a good deal to do in making
A mother thinks her daughter's
faithful piano practico is sweet music.
That is love.
To dally much with subjects moan
and low, proves that the mind is weak
or makes it so.-The South-West.
Danger From Lightning,
There is a somewhat widespread im
pression that the use of so much wiro
for telephone and other electrical pur
poses in cities and towns largely in
creases tho danger of lightning
strokes. Tho notion is based upon
the concentration within certain lim
its of a great quantity of conducting
material,which, it is assumed, attracts
the electricity and thereby increases
the danger of it. While it is true that
the increaee of conducting material
increases the attraction, it is not true
that it increases tho danger. As a
matter of fact, it decreases tho dan
ger, for tho moro surface electricity
has over which to spread, tho more
readily and quickly it is carried to tho
earth. A house with a metal roof is
not often struck by lightning, for
while tho metal may attract tho elec
tricity, it also gives it room to spread
ont, and its force ia thus dissipated.
This fact was demonstrated by Frank
lin with his kito long ago, and light
ning rods aro put on buildings to give
storm clouds a means of discharging
their electricity into tho earth. This
discharge takes place without tho ro
poit that wo call thnndor, for electric
ity makes no noiso unloss it uieots
somo resisting medium.
It ?E a woll-known fact that there ?B
less danger from lightning in citios
than in the country, and this ?3 duo to
tho general uso of iron, stool and'
other metals in city buildings. The
buildings are tall, and would seom,
therefore, to bo specially attraotive to
tho lightning; indeed, they aro often
struck, but tho metal in thom dissi
pates tho force of the fluid and carries
it harmlessly and quietly to the oarth.
Tho effect of telephone wires upon at
mospheric electricity has been under
official investigation by the German
department of telegraphs, and statis
tics from 900 cities show that the dan
ger from lightning strokes is four
times ns great in towns that do not
have the telephone as in those that
hive it. Tho conclusion of the whola
matter, therefore, is that an abund
ance of wires gives protection from
lightning, instead of increasing tho
- ii -
A Simple Means ot Transportation.
The ascent of mountains and the
carrying of necessary articles up very
steep inclines necessitate an enormaus
amount of labor and time. It is pos
sible to put up wiro rope tramways at
a very small expense, and have those
so arranged that loads can be brought
up a minimum of the cost and trou
blo now involved.
A sample of this device is, a wiro
tramway recently put up at Gibraltar.
It connects tho signal station at tho
top of the rock with tho town below.
There are two ropes, 320 yards long,
leading to the mountain. An engine
works the ropes which are able to Bus
tain a weight of seventy tons. Tho
transit from tho town to the station
occupios scarcely five minutes, where
formerly it took a whole clay.
Ou the general principle of tho car
riage lino that delivers parcels and
chango in stores, au effective and rapid
means of transit between tho various
points may be secured.
Tho rope tramway idea is yet in its
infancy, but before another ten years
have passed this invention will be util
ized to connect buildings of all sorts.
It would bc of untold value could a
Bingle ropo and basket bo BO arranged
that one might pass from house to out
buildings, regardless of snow, storm,
or rnin, stepping from one sheltered
entry at tho house to another at tho
barn without coming in contact with
the ground. The time and need are
here, and only await tho inventive
genius who shall put theso into prac
tical operations. -New York Lodger.
Dutch Cure tor Laziness.
Tho Dutch aro not fond of lazy
people, and they have a very good
way of curing persons who can but
won't work, if a pauper who is ablo
to work refuses to do so they put him
into a cistern, to which a pump is at
tached, and turn on a stream of water.
This stream flows into tho cistern just
slow enough to enable tho lazy person
by lively pumping to keep the water
from getting up over his head.-Now
A Remarkable Jet ot Water.
A live-inch jet of water, which risos
in a solid stream for over 100 feet, is
ono of tho features of tho No. 2 reser
voir at Portland, Oregon. Colonel
Smith, tho chief engineer of tho water
works, says that it will bo possiblo to
Lave even a finer jet at No. 8 reservoir
in the city jiark. A jct of 200 feet
and as many fountains as can be got,
throwing water as high as desired,
may be some of thu features.-New
lt ia claimed that there are fifty-five
dogs in the United Kingdom to cver^
BUDGET OF FUN.
K?JxMOROUS SKETCHES FROM
Good for Another Day-A Necessary
ing a Selection- Tickling
the Baby, Etc., Etc.
There came a burst of thunder sound;
Tho boy-oh. where was he?
Out at tho city baseball irround,
Whore he had slipped ia freo.
The lightning flashed, the Ihundor rolled,
Tho rain came pouring down;
Tho game was called, nad, wet with cold,
He sprinted into town.
Back to tho offics bc returned,
And sadly did explain
How his grandmother's funeral
Was postponed by the rain.
-Sansas City Journal.
A NECESSARY PRECAUTION.
"So they lock tho jury up every
night, do they?"
.'Yee ; otherwise they might break
loose and kill some of thc lawyers."
MAKING A SELECTION.
"Will yon take ether or gas?" tho
dentist asked his patient.
"Either? Then I'll give you gas."
She-"Hero is the story of a man
who says he never made love tn a girl
in his life. Do you believo it?"
He-"It may bo true. Some fel
lows make a specialty of widows, you
know. "-Indianapolis Journal.
HI? LIFE WORK.
"Oh, papa! what makes Mr. Grab
enheiraer walk BO stoop-shouldered?
He looks Uko a horseshoe."
"I have heard, my son, that many
years ago, when ho was a very littlo
boy, no bigger than you aro now, ho
found a cont. -Puck.
A GLOOMY PROSPECT.
Mr. Finemind-"My dear, my sci
entific works are bringing me iu a for
tune, and we will soon bc rich."
Mrs. Finemind-"Too bad. Now
wo will havo to associate with a lot of
nobodies who inherited their wealth."
-New York Weekly.
TICKLING THE BABY.
Askin-"Good gracious, Kidder!
How came you by that fearful cold?"
Kidder-"My wife leaves tho win
dow open every night when the baby
is wakeful and allows the wind to
blow on me because it amuses tho baby
to hear mo cough."-Truth.
ATTRACTIONS OP MANLY SPORT.
Cholly-"Say, this golf is a great
game, isn't it?"
Reggy-"Don't know. Never played
Cholly-"Neither have L But I've
got my golfing suit and its perfectly
THE PREFERABLE FATE.
Dusty Rhodes-"Yes, de.ludgo sen
tenced poor Chimmio to ten year3 at
hard work, but Chimmio has asked to
havo his sentence commuted."
Weary Waggles -"What's that?"
Dusty Rhodes-"He asked de Judge
for to let him be hung."-Chicago
FLATTERY FOR SALE.
Gypsy (telling an elderly coquette's
fortune from the lines of her hand)
"I am sorry to tell the young lady
that Bhe will pass through a serious
illness in her twentieth year."
Lady- "Good gracious !" (Sighs and
gives the gipsy a dollar.)-Fliegende
MIGHT BE SO CLASSED.
"Paw," asked Tommy, "is it swear
ing for a man say 'by grab?' "
"Whom did you hear saying it?"
"Old Mr. Gotrox."
"I hardly know in his case. It looks
a good deal like profanity when a man
swears by his religion."-Indianapolis
ASKING THE IMPOSSIBLE.
"You will have to get somebody to
identify yon," said the paying toller.
"But that's impossible !" exclaimed
the presenter of the check. "Since
I've had this check in my possession,
I've been so proud that my own
mother wouldn't know me."-Boston
Tommy-"Paw, what is an egotist ?"
Mr. Figg-"Ho is a man who thinks
ho is smarter than any ono else."
Mrs. Figg-"My dear, you have that
wrong. Tho egotist is the man Avho
says ho is smartor thau any ono else.
All men think that way."-Indian
Bingo-"Bobby, did yon eat that
pie vour mother made for you yester
Bobby-"No, sir. I gavo it to my
Bingo-"Did she eat it?"
Bobby-"I guess so. There wasn't
any school to-day."-Puck.
NOT MUCH RISK.
Examining Physician (for insurance
company) - "I'm afraid wo can't take
you, sir. You are too great a risk."
Applicant (resignedly)-"Weill per
haps I am. Tho fact ia, that when I
get sick I never send for a doctor. I
just lay around until I get well."
Examining Physician -"Eh? Um
we'll tako you."--New York Weekly.
HE WROTE FOR THEM.
"I have written pooms for nearly all
tho magazines," the young man said,
as the editor glanced through thc
violot ink manuscript.
"Ah?" the editor said with a raising
inflection on thc nh ; "I hadn't noticed
any of them."
"No," the young man answorcd,
"they were sent back to mc."-Rock
land (Mc.) Tribune.
Employer-"I am sorry to say that
tho experts report serious irregulari
ties in your accounts."
Cashier-"Is that all they havo to
Cashier-"Nota word of apprecia
tion of tho simplicity, novelty and
originality of my method of doctoring
tho books? This is, indcod, a cruel
COULD MAKE ONE TO ORDER.
"This is a mighty fiuo place, I don't
think," contemptuously observed the
tattered vagrant, "The benches hain't
boen painted for nine years, tho trees
ueed trimmin' an' the grass is dyin'
fur want of bein' looked after. You j
hain't got no bump of order."
? I'll raise ono ou you mighty <?uick I
if you don't move on," answered the
park policeman, unlimbering his club.
A DEEP AND LASTING SOMtOW.
Mr. Say les-"Why, my dear-why
are you crying?"
Mrs. Sayles (with sobs)-"Ob, John,
don't yon remember my new crepon
skirt I got at such a bargain last week
for fifteen dollars?"
Mr. Sayles-"Yes; what then?"
Mrs. Sayles (weeping afresh)-"I
p-p-passed Lacey's t-t-to-day, and
they were all m-m-morked down to
fourteen dollars and ninety-eight
SLOW TO TUililiE.
She had now become desperate.
"Your family has a grand name,"
"I would prefer almost any other,"
she rejoined wita a promptness suffi
cient to suggest that she had given the
""After a time she sat as one in a
trance, and wondered what would bo
thc chances of his tumbling if a wheat
elevator were to precipitate itself
upon him.-Detroit Tribune.
Thc Tongues ol Birds.
The old idea that thc woodpecker
transfixes its prey with it3 sharp
tipped tongue is probably not yet ex
tinct, but Herr Prevot adds his oppo
sition to this opinion, and states that
the insects aro agglutinated to tho
tongue by the sticky secretion with
which its surface is copiously covered.
Although thc form of the tongue usu
ally corresponds to tho shape of the
bill there are exceptions to this rule,
as for example in the waders, king
fisher and hoopoe which, in spite of
their long bills, only possess small
cartilaginous tongues; in the peli
can, indeed, tho tongue is alto
In most birds whose food consists
of seeds the tongue is dart or awl
shaped; in others spatulntc; rarely,
vermiform or tubular. In some birds,
such as tho owl, which swallow their
prey entire, the tongue is broad and
serves as a mero shovel. In the hedge
sparrow, nuthatch, woodchuck and
others, tho tonguo is bifid or trifid at
i ts apex, while in the humming-birds
the tongue is split iuto two branches,
almost to its base, and ie used for ac
tually gripping the small insects on
which these resplendent little crea
In the family of parrots tho tongue
is provided at its apex with a brush of
some 250 or 300 hairlike processes. In
the parrots tho tonguo is thick and
; fleshy, devoid of horny barbs or pa
pilla}, and is even suspected to pos
sess sense organs of taste.-Nature.
- iCJU -
The Cost ot Living.
Although the cost of living has
been materially reduced in most ar
ticles of necessity and wages axe much
higher than they were thirty years
ago the majority of tho people aro but
little better off financially. The rea
son is to be found in tho higher scale
of living which has to be met to regain
any social position.
Thirty years ago mon in moderato
circumstances thought themaelves well
off with living rooms furnished plain
ly and simply, the chambers with
enameled bedsteads and chairs and I
! plain linen and plated silver through
out. This is all changed, and the liv
ing rooms must copy as closely a
pos8iblo tho appurtenances and be
longings of wealthy families. There
is no enameled furniture for sale, and
whero rag carpets were formerly
thought good enough for ordinary uso
there aro Brussels carpets, imitationj
of imported rags and all sorts of use
less bric-a-brac that runs away with
many a hardly earned dollar.
All classes consume and enjoy a
great deal more than they formerly
did, and everybody, rich, moderately
circumstanced or poor, wants more
than he formerly did. All classes
travel moro frequently and longer dis
tances than they were formerly accus
tomed to. They have more clothes,
more food, moro finery, more books
and papers than their fathers had, but
they do not save as much as they did.
Peculiar Malady Among Squirrels.
Belief from the squirrel pest, which
has threatened to utterly ruin the
farmers of tho southern and south
eastern part of Whitman County, in
Eastern Washington, seems to bo at
baud. Bocent reports from different
points of the afflicted district aro to
tho effect that instead of the immense
increase in numbers which had been
predicted from tho carly appearance
of the squirrels, there is a marked de
crease over last year, amounting in
some instances almost to their extinc
Tho cause is not thoroughly under
stood, but is believed to bo tho preva
lence amoug them ot a fateful epi
At several places around Penowawa
they aro reported to be dying in ap
preciable numbers, and examination
has shown the squirrels to bo covered
with scabs. A. L. Daniels, living
near Pcuewawo, says tho animals in
his neighborhood no longer run nim
bly about, and in many instances drag
their bind parts. In fact, they are so
badly used up that a man can walk up
to them. George Smith reports a
similar condition in his neighbor
hood, and in other sections tho dimin
ution in tho numbers of tho squirrels
has been noticed, though the cause has
not been determined.-Portland (Ore
A Parrot's Memory.
Parrots are in many respects, no
doubt, wonderful birds, and to tho
many stories concerning them has to
bc added ouo from Mayfair. Tho par
ticular bird in question was in tho
habit of calling tho footman who fed
it "Jacko," and tho correspondent of
tho Manchester Evcniug News, who
tells the story, says that by and hythe
footman left tho establishment. Years
passed, and ho was forgotten. Ono
afternoon, however, the parrot sud
denly startled tho inmates of tho
house by muttering "Jacko" rapidly
aud excitedly, as it were, in his
dreams. Some one had the curiosity
to run to tho window, and was just in
time to seo a carriage disappearing in
thc distance, on whoso box sat Jacko
tho footraarj, iu all tho glory of
powdered bair. Tho bird, who had
nover seen hiui in tho gnise before,
must, it is allogod, havo recognized
him at once.-London Exchange.
K Well-Ballasted Fish.
Au extraordinary discovery was
mado in the stomach of a fish of the I
ling species at Liverpool wholesale
market recently, according to the '
Wesminstcr Gazette. Tho fish weighed j
fifteen pounds, and in its stomach ;
wero two smooth cobblo stones, weigh- '
ing over live pounds, which had evi
dently been used as sinkers for a deep
sea fishing line. Tho fish, so far as
could be seeu, did not appear to have
suffered from tho presence of suoh a
weight in its stomach? .
Incubation Period of Discases.
Tho Clinical Society of LondoD,
wishing to establish a period of incu
bation for various diseases, instituted
a series of investigations with the fol
Diphtheria.-In this disease the in
cubation period does not as a rule ex
ceed four days and is more often two
days. It may also extend to five, six
and seven days. The infection may
take place at any time in the course
of tho disease. Mild cases may
Typhoid Fever.-This may vary
within wide limits twelve to fourteen
days, but not infrequently it is less.
As tho disease is usually introduced
into the system by food and drink, it
is not carried from ono person to an
other, but several may get it from thc
eamo source. Contaminated water
and milk is the usual cause.
Epidemic Influenza or "Grippe."
The shortest incubation period in this
disease is from a few hours to three or
four days. It generally strikes sud
denly and without warning. A pati
ent may carry infection throughout
the whole course of the disease.
Measles.-The incubation period of
measles is usually short. It is counted
from the date of the eruption, which
decides the disease.
Mumps.-Tho incubation period of
nmmps is rather long, from cte to two
weeks, and the chances of infection
Rubeola, Rotheln, or German
Measles.-This has a long incubation
period, like ordinary measles, and its
infectivity diminishes in a day or two
after tho rash disappears.
Variola or Smallpox.-The incuba
tion period of this disease is from ono
to three days.
Varicella, or chickenpox, hos a
period of incubation slightly longer
than variola.-Scientific American.
A Pair of Them.
He wes an oldish man, with a good
natured face and a weed on his hat, and
ho sat down in a Baker street car be
side another oldish man, with a good
natured face and a weed on his hat.
They looked up at each other and
smiled, and the first comer querried:
"Wife, I take it?"
"Yes, and you?"
"Bad, isn't il?"
"Time is a great healer."
"And in due time both of us-"
And he winked.
And a woman across tho aisle,with a
faint show of mourniug on, looked out
of the window and sighed and said :
"Yes, of course, the old repro
bates!"-Detroit Free Press.
Minnie-Mr. Billie, if I should con
sent to be your wife, are yon sure you
would never object to my c'rcssmakcr'6
bills, never refuse to buy opera tickets
when asked, never-er-in fact, never
object to any expenses which I might
wish to incur?
Mr. Billie-Darling, I swear it !
Minnie-Well, Mr. Billie, if you
can't hold on to your money any bet
ter than that, I must say no.- hidgc.
The Spider's Web.
Tho spider is so well supplied with
the silky thread with which it makes its
web that an experimenter once drew
out of thc body of a single specimen
3,480 yards of the thread-a length
but little short of two miles. A fabric
woven of spider's thread is more glossy
than that from the silkworm's product,
and is of a beautiful golden color.
The Classes and tho Masses.
Dickens-There is no such thing ae
social equality. Did you ever know a
place where everybody was on a dead
Wickens-Tes, in the cemetery.
iVcw York World.
Why She Smiles Sweetly.
Sparkling By68, quick beating heart, and
the rosy blush of pleasure on tho cheeks,
makes tho strong man happy when ho meets
his lady love. That's tho "kind of a man
whose very touch thrills because it is full of
energy, ?vigorous nervo power and vitality.
Tobacco makes strong men impotent, weak
and skinny. No-To-Dac sold by Druggists
everywhere. Guaranteed to cure. Book,
titled "Don't Tobacco Spit or Smoko Your
Life Away," free. Ad. Sterling ltomcdy Co.,
Now York or Chlcaso.
For Well People.
Most medicines are for the sink. Some ran
ho ll?cU willi gool offerts by person* nppi
renily mil. Occasional resort to Hipans
Tubules prevent* attacks that result ironi
disorders of thc f-tomnch and liver.
To preservo is better and cheaper than to
Mr?. Wlnslow'sSoothlnir Syrup for children
Irethlnir. softens the tm ms, reduces In flam lin
don, allay? '"?IM. mires "-itri eolio.. 25;?. n, bottle
THOM- llNtrcasisijt Cornu!
Und as they n*c. Ilindireorni will remove
them, and then you c n walk ns you like.
have to g
fiL V what every
\ \ and th(
V \\ removed
P \\ But tr
ip*?*? 9' v. - - because
found something better than soa
Something easier, quicker, sim
economical. No rubbing to s
Wear-^easy work and money sa\
it's washing clothes, cleaning I
kind of washing and cleaning.
Artificial rubies now so closely re?
semble tho genuine stones that it is
difficult for even jewelere to distin
Fish moy be kept fresh for several
days by sprinkling them with pow
dered borax and keeping them in a
ecol, dry place.
Advance theets of "living-picture'1
posters must be sent to and approved
by ihe Boston Aldermen beforo they
are allowed to go on tho bill-boards.
The French actress, Madame Rejane,
receives $1,600 for each performance,
and her manager also pays her travel
ing expenses and those of her maid
and a dressmaker.
A man of rare information officiates
as teacher in the vicinity of Howells,
Nebraska. The other day ho gravely
told an inquiring pupil that B. 0.
meant "Beforo Columbus discovered
A gentleman who recently died in
"Vienna, at Ihe age of seventy, had
been a smoker sinco be was seventeen.
During that time he had smoked 328,
613 cigars, 43,639 of which were gifts.
Those he paid for cost him $12,500.
An old bank-book was found by a
New York widow, in which was one
deposit of $5, which had been made
by her husband in the year 1820. She
mude claim at the bank, and received
the principal aud accumulated inter
est, amounting to $248.
A rattling remedy for rheumatism
was tried on an old farmer in Spring
field, N. J. For several mouths he had
baen bed-ridden with the disease. Six
tightly corked bottles of water were
placed on tho stove. In bali an hour
they exploded, causing tho terrified
patient to bound from the bed and run
down stairs. The rheumatic pains
have left him.
Thomas Lyons, an old shoemaker
who died a few weeks ago in Roches
ter, England, at the age of 96, had
drawn for 79 years a boy's pension,
amounting to $90 annually. A pre38
gang forced him into the navy when he
was nine years old. Eight years later
his thigh was injured by the falling of
a spar, and thereafter ho walked with
a wooden prop.
Foul breath'is a
discourager of af
fection. It is al
ways an indication
of poor health -
bad digestion. To
bad digestion is
. traceable almost all
human ills. It is
'the starting point
of many very ser
Upon the healthy
'action of the diges
t i v e organs, the
blood depends for its richness and purity.
If digestion stops, poisonous matter ac
cumulates and is forced into the blood
-there is no place else for it to go.
The bad breath is a danger signal.
Look out for it ! If yon have it, or
any other symptom of indigestion,
take a bottle or two of Dr. Pierce's
Golden Medical Discover}'. It will
straighten out the trouble, make your
blood pure and healthy and fuU of nu
triment for tlie tissues.
SECURED BY STUDENTS
Richmond's Commercial College,
Send for Catalogne. SAVANNAH, GA,
Tills IR the Anent Hotel in its appointments
south of Ballimore. The table U supplied
w ith nil the delicacies thc market can afford.
Tho Cui-inc is excellent, and Berrico prompt
and attentive. Open nil th? rear. Rans rea
sonable. J. H. STILWELL, Manager.
P| TO AVOID THIS USB
Sil , Tho ONLY painless ?nd harmless
rt T <*ui:E f.ir th* w.irsf. lyne of Kczema,
I mm. I Tetter, R'nxworm, ugly rough patoh
?U 1 M on the face, crusted scalp.
IIA Ground itch, chafes, chaps, pim
HT pies. Poison from ivy or potion oalc.
|p In short ALL ITCHES. _Send Adc, in
Hftan.pi or c.ish to J. T. Shuptnne,
Savannah, Ga., for one box, if your
druggist d.in't Icoep it.
TYBEE ISLAND, GA.
This Hotel is noted for its excellent service and
splendid cn sine, iii- r.-i!>'.?. boinc Mipp ind with all the
delicacies the margot alford'- An Mandant supply of
fish, crabs, -V inp, etc. Lion's tine orchestra en
caged for season- Specially low tatos this s-ason.
\Wto for terni.-. Special inducements to parti?< of
ten or more- li Ol IAN ?fc COWAN.
Cleaners and beautifies the hair.
Promotes a luxuriant prowth.
Never Fails to Bcstore Groy
Hair to ita Youthful Color.
Cures scalp ?'.?tram t? hair tailing.
A.. N. U. Twenty-five, '95.
ig soap, long ago.
e stopped because-well, we'll
uess why. Perhaps, because
too much work to do. That's
body thinks, for that matter,'
re's nothing but soap at hand,
?re's a good deal of dirt to be
[ from anything,
tis one stopped
ipeak of, no
louse, or any