Newspaper Page Text
THOS. 1 ADAMS. PROPRIETOR.
EDGEE?ELD, S. C., THURSDAY, APRIL 7, 1892.
VOL. LVII. NO. 13.
THOS. J. ADA?
SOTES AND COMMENT,
.The English langajgo is annually
increased by thc addition of about 1 JG
Mulhal!, tho noted statistician,
spent over forty yenrsin accnuiulating
the m "ferial fur hii one volume of
. It is stated by tho encyclopedias
that euchre was invented in Pennsyl
vania. The gamo is little known out
'side of the United States.
Professor Haddon, of Dublin, Ire
land, still believes the old story that
Parnell is yet alive and is on some
Western ranch in this country. Ho
has, therefore, refused to writo tho
life of the Irish statesman.
The Chairman of the Board of
Supervisors of Milwaukee, Wis., says
that that oity pays lifty percent, more
'in proportion lo its population to
wards tho support of tho poor than
any other oity in the country.
In Koseburg, Oregon, thero 13 a
curfew ordinance that applies to boys
only. As it is strictly enforced, the
lack of any necessity for a similar
mesisure of repression for girls is so
evident that, tho San Francisco "Ex
aminer thinks comment becomes un
A Berlin dispatch to the London
Morning Post says that Signor Crispi,
the former Italian Premier, in an au
tograph letter to a charity baziar, de
clares that it is a delusion to suppose
that Europe is in favor of peace. The
ambitious and revengeful Powers,
say? Signor Crispi, ore only waiting
until success is assured t:> plunge
Europe into war.
Professor Gildersleeve, of Johns
Hopkins University, who was one of
the spectators of the Olympian games
last summer, in lecturing about them
in Baltimore a few nights ago, said
that the Greeks were very much morti
fied because young Garrett, of Balti
more, beat their best man in throwing
the discus. They took it so much to
heart that the ~-??ticing un
til finally au *
announce tb '
of "the gre.
In spite of th
years to supp
terfeiting it seems that-very uw?v
progress has been made in that direc
tion. Out of 780 arrests made by^Gov
ernmeut officials in the secret service
employ during the past year 711 were
fer counterfeiting in different phases.
Of this number 568 were for passing
counterfeit coins. The Government
officers dnring the year captured no
less than 8757,030 in counterfeit bills,
together with a largo amount of coin.
The failure of the Government to sup
press counterfeiting is duo rather to
the increasing skill and ?ugcnuity of
counterfeiters than to any lack of vig
ilance on the part of the olficers. Un
less some new system is devhad there
seems *,o bo- no possible escape from
According to Hie Kew England
omesteac!, the terms of thc settle
ment of the coufliot between Protest
ants and Roman Catholics in Manitoba
over the teaching of religion in the
public schools, are substantiality as
follows: Beligious teaching shull be
conduoted in a public school where a
majority of the trustees authorize it
or a certain number of persons peti
tion for it. A Roman Catholic teacher
is to be employed-in a school having a
certain number of Roman Catholio
children, if the parents ol these chil
dren so petition. lu schools where
there is not room to separata Catholic
and Protestant children during the
daily half-hour of Catholio instruction,
the Catholio teaching shall he given
half of the month and tho Protestant
the other half. This arrangement is
a concession on the part o( the Pro
testants, who are largely in the ma
jority in Manitoba.
The Rev. Miles Grant, of Boston,
has created considerable comment by
hi? assertion that eighty-seven and 0
half cents a week, or St?.?O a year is
sufficient to feed a healthy, grown
Mr. Grant defends his theory
saying: "In relation to the
thy qaantity' of food, I became
itisfied that most people ato toe
inch. When I came to decido on the
(unntity that my system needed, 1
fir?t let my appetite decide; bnt il
soon occurred to my mind that my ap
petite had neither reason nor judg
ment, and, therefore, wan not coiape
tent to direct in the matter. The late
Dr. Dio Lewis, of Boston, gave me t
very valuable rule on this subject,
which wa-', to decide on the quanti ty
before the mouthful is taken. Aftei
weighing and measuring my food, anri
noting the effect upon my stomach, 1
arrived at the quantity and quality ol
food adapted to a healthy system. J
found that when I followed that my
stomach made no moro complain;
ibout its work than did my eyes when
seeing, ears when hearing or heart 01
lungs when breathing. I havo nol
had the sick headache once in forty?
? NOVEL INDUSMY.
SALTING DOWN MUTTON BIRDS
FOR AUSTRALIAN MARKETS.
j Great Quantities of the Kdlble Sea
Fowls Are Tacked In Barrels
for Shipment Like Pork
Where They are Found.
TASTES differ in different lati
tudes, eveu among English
speaking people. Imagino
Caucasians dining on salted
petrels, und with a relish, too, as
though-that fish-eating sea bird were
a luxury. Of all the fowl that haunt
the barren islands on the California
coast none are considered quite so
worthless as the sooty petrel. Even
the teagull has his usefulness as a
scavenger on the bays along the coast,
bat the pretrel is truly a despised bird
m these waters. Seagulls* eggs bring
a price in the market that make it
worth while to gather them at consid
erable expense, but no one thinks it
worth while to rob the petrels' nests
on the rookeries at tho Farallone isl
It is different in Australia. Is it the
cold winds that blow up /rom the Ant
arctic regions or the hot air that
sweeps down from tho equator? No
matter what the cause, the fact is that
the appetites of our Australian cousins
are radically different. The sooty
petrel is there nn edible fowl with a
decided market value, and a number
of men and small craft are employed
each year in catching, salting, pack
ing and carrying it in gr sat quantities
from the rookeries on Trefoil Island
and other adjoining islands on tho
TREFOIL ISLAND, THE HOJ
north const of Tasmania to Stanley
I and Melbourne.
Mutton birds is the general name
given the petrel there, and the men
and ships engaged in the business are
known as "mutton birders." To
Americans V j is quite a novel indus
try, and the fact that such common
sea birds as the petrel are packed and
salted down like fo much pork is
always a matter of wonderment to
atrangers who go there. But the test
you reacn lutuwu.u^ - -
acclimated enough to venture a trip
across to Tasman.R, yon may dmei off
tho young of thoso very biMsth.it
passed you n the California coast,
only now they will be served to you as
These fowls leave the Furailonci
every few months, and once every
year they visit Australia. Trefoil Isl
and is their chief roosting place in the
Southern hemisphere, to far as is
known. Here thty scratch and dig in
the barren soil until they have bur
rowed a bolo perhaps two feet deep.
Into these holes each hen m the im
mense flock deposits her one egg. Ibo
mutton birder inserts his arm full
stretch for his game. He dees not
take iho csu, but waits a week or ten
days alter tho ?gjg has been hatched.
Then he finds the J^ng bird almost
is quito unable to escape from the
catchers. It cannot rrount into the
air from off the Janel tbougu. its wmgc
THE MUTTON BIKU.
are enormously long in proportion tt
its black body, and it rises quite grace
fully from the water. On shore, how
ever, fha strange bird must hop alon;
at a slow pace, and can only Hy iron
thc top of a ledge. Certain points o
Trefoil Island are littered with thou
sands of these nests, and it is no diffi
cult task to gather the yearly hcrvesl
of young mutton birds. The mu',toi
birding season on Trefoil Island lasti
from a month to ?ix weeks, and thi
includes the catching, salting, pack
ing and shipping. They are packec
in casks, and these are loaded 01
coasting schooners that come aftei
them from Tasmania and Melbourne
By the time the .rcsh orop of mut
ton birds is being er*en at Melbourn?
the adult parents, with perhaps a cer
tain percentage of theyoucgones tha
have escaped the catchers, aro return
ing to their old haunts, occupyinc
the old and scratching nev
nests on the Farallone Islands. He?
the birds are practically unmolested
and it may thus be said, with SOUK
basis in reason, that the Culifornii
coast is supplying the Aastraliai
coasters with their edible sea fowl. I
is true, of course, that the petrel rind
other quiet nesting pinces besides tb?
islands off tho California coast, but i
is also trae that Catalina, the Saut
Barbara channel islands, ana* tho Jfar*
aliones are their chief rookeries on
j this coast, and that at certain seasons
these islands are entirely deserted by
TACKING MTJTTON BIRDS.
them, while tho islands off Tasmania
and the southern coast of Australia
then swarm with them.-San Francisco
KOW THE MUTOC?CLE.
New Wheels Which Are Propelled
by Automatic Power.
Motocyoles and other vehicles pro
pelled by automatic power are enjoy
ing a boom in England. They have
reached Euch a prominent position in
the kingdom that a paper ?9 published
weekly in their interests. November
14 was termed a red letter day by the
IE OF THE MUTTON BIRDS.
automobilists.on account of tho throw
ing open of the highways to the queer
vehicles. New companies are being
formed on all sides and prospeofcnses
rivaling the pictorial fancy of the min
ing boom days are being distributed
The moforcycle is attracting wide
spread interest and at least a dozen
makes are on tho market. In a recent
public test at Coventry tho prize win
ner was described as bealing every
who rode it, atands something over
rix feet, aad is a very broadly built
mau, so that his machino was put to
very fair test when taking bim up o
sharp incline- _
rM**u?immm vuc??; ?Ve"
in no respects Uu?.,:^ i-u3 guuu,
as many varieties that were popular
aver a quarter of a century ago, and
yet it is recognized by all hands that
new varieties are essential. This
chiefly comes from a di-ease caused by
the operations of the ptrawberry fun
gus, which takes the form of tmall
brown spots on tho leaves. Wherever
it occurs.thestrawberry plants decline
in health and general quality. AB long
as a variety can be kept free from this
trouble new kinds arc not essential,
but it seems, according io the experi
ence of most strawberry growers, that
Eooner or later these little parasites
will discover the most isolated planta
Was Coming Jlown Anyhow.
Some years ago there lived in Perth,
Scotland, a man of convivial habits,
well known by his Christian name of
Jamie. One dark night an acquaint
ance found Jamie at tho foot of tho
ontside stair. "Is that you, Jamie?"
asked the acquaintance in a voice of
the greatest astonishment. "Aye, it's
me," replied Jamie, in a tone of com
plete resignation, "dave you fa'en
doon the stair?" was tho next ques
tion. "Aye, I fell doon, but I was
coming doon, whether or no."
Liniment for Scalds and Barns.
Take equal parts of Florence oil, or
freshly drawn linseed oil, and lime
water; shake them well together in a
wide bottle, so as to lorm a liniment.
This will be found en exceedingly
healing application for recent scalds
and burns. It may either bo spread
upon a cloth, or the parts affected moy
bo anointed w th it two or three timen
a day.-New York Journal.
A Circus Puzzle Picture.
Find the roj, e walker.
EDGEFIELD, S. C., \^
I02?K TASTEFUL OAR3IKXTS FOR
i Lon? Coat of Fur-Trimmed
Beaver Cloth for Misses
Child'? Broivnlj Cap
TEE original imported model cf
the stylish garment depicted
in the first large engraving,
and described by May Man
ion, waa made of brown beaver cloth
(rimmed with stone marten fur. The
nrhich may ho muuu w. -- .
astrakhan, c?ose invisibly with s*>
books and loops, three largo battons;
effecting tho closing just abo-"; ar-d ;>o
low the waist lins. Inserted pocket3
on each front ar? finished with pocket
laps. The back and sides flt closely
with the usual centre-back, side and
under-arm seams, the extra fulness be
low the waist lino boing laid in two
handsome box-plaita that stand out
well in godet style. The fashionable
coat sleeves are stylishly lull at
tho top, fitting the arm clo-oly belo*
the elbow, and completed at tin
wrists with round flaring cuff*. Thi
mode is adapted to all manner ol
cloakings, including kersey, beaver,
bouole, tweed, serge and cheviot.
The garment can bo compl?t?e
wjfch ??trifttlv tailor-aninK or trim mee
with for, velour, Astrakhan or sea
plush. To make this coat for a mis
in the medium size will require fa
and one-half yards of fifty-iour-ih
CHILD'S BBOWNIE BONNET AND irrr;
The seoond lar je illustration de;ts
a quaint little Brownie bonnet ai a
stylish little muff deigned for gls
from onoto six ycart cf age. Eh
nre worn with r, dresey little coat, 'o
bonnet, coat and ini.fi are maded'
forest-green silk heavily corded vb
trimmings of velvot in a darker the,
and narrow bauds of beaver. e
bonnet, rising in a high point, ha
Eeam which extends from tho poino
thc front edge and is s nooth-fittin.t j
the sides with the additional mated
.it the back laid in closo overlap!.?
plaits. A oircuiar cm tain or ruifSs
joined to the bottom, and the fat j
edges have pointed levers that .'e.
widest at tho to;?, graduating abo '
lower edge, where a wido libbon jt-1
til y bowed ter vos a? fi.steuiog. je j
f ?ES DAY, JAJNUAri? Tit
V "arranged overT ?l?s? fitting j feet,
that has a soft ruche of lace en-1 mendi
i the lace of the little wearer , fizare
kcoming eflect. The deep ruble I
btlines the free edges of the
tte is here represented as made
; but may bo also fashioned of
ibbon eittier gathered or quilled,
dainty little muff is adorned
fall bow of ribbon. The deep
at each end are circular iu
causing them to flare stylishly,
jb, silk, velvet, plush and oorda
e comtaendoble for making, in
action with lace, ribbon and
[ make the hood and mufi for a
lol four yoars will take one-half
tho left side und arranged in sou
waves on each side of the head, is a
las.iionablo fad of the moment with
stylish young women. If the hair is
not naturally wavy, it is pal up on
extra icrge pins at night, the hair well
raoistened before it is twined in and
I cut on the pins. A c'asp that cornea
j T7ith the box of pins holds the waved
.tressea ?rmlv in position.-New York
ATtRACTIVE COSTUME FOR A GIRL.
Piaid cauvas cl'jth coinoined with
reivet, in powder blue, made thia at
trastive dress. Upon a well-fitted lin
ing the material of the waist is mount
ed and tuc closing is effected at the
back with buttons aud button-holes.
The fanciful front displays a plastron
of velvet, uniquely shaped, forming a
circular yoke and extending down the
: CAP AND MUFF.
front in "V" shape to the waistline.
The contrasting material on each side
is collected in gathers aud fastened at
tho top by straps of velvet having
mitred poiut?, with buttons for decor
ation. At the lower edge the material
is also gathered, with tho fatness
drawn well to the centra front. Gath
ers at tho shoulder edges and waist
adjust tho lulness of the baok and
smooth under-arui gores separate the
front Iroui tbe back. A wrinkled belt
of velvet encircles tho waist. The
stylish sleeves follow the arm closely
from the wrists to a goodly height
abo.-c tho elbow, the additional mater
ial being arranged upou the uppers in
soft bouffant eHrcteuuqbt through the
centre iu ba tier Hy style. Prettily
shaped cuffs of velvet complete the
wri?t?. At rlie neck is a clo e standing
hana over which is arranged a crushed
collar ana tiny points of velvet. Tho
skirt is smooth fitting at the bark, be
ing gathered, aud falls in graceful ef- \
"AU seasonable fabric* are oom
ible tor making, plaid, striped,
d and novelty goods combining,
LS* COSTUME OF rLAID 0A5VA8 CLOTH.
ittily with plain material in either
k, velvet or cloth. #
To make this dress for a girl eigtf
ara of age will require three and
e-fonrth yards of forty-iour-mcb
MILLISENT H INT 3.
Peacock green and bine and gold
east feathers, yellowish green, and
oe green birds' heads, quills and
nea are much used on black, dark
?een, gray and golden brown hats
id bonnets, and wido watered Bilk
3WS with largo buckles of Irish dia
onds in the centre, are used wit:,
aod effect on black and green hats in
nbens, Sir Peter Lely, and Duoheus
f Devonshire chapes-all large and
arcading in contour. On some of tho
ats with towering crowns the wateied
ibbon ia laid on folds and put around
he crown in three rows, each row eni
Qg ot the lett side in a stiff bow held
?y smaller Rhinestone buckles.
FAXCIES IS FURS.
Among Parisian fancies are small
rar boleros almost covered with heavy
jeadedarabesques cn applique sunken
D the rich pile. This decoration ia
.epeated on velvet boleros finished
with high standing Queen Bess co lars.
French coats of fur or velvet are lined
with tatin broche in bright changea
ble effect-, vollow, Dani-h red, aud
green shados appearing prominently.
Broad girdles, pointed in both tho
THE DUCHESS OF EUDFOP.D.
neighborhood of Woburn Abbey, the
horses bolte I, and the carriage was
upset, its occupants being dashed
with considerate force against a huge
tree. The Duchess has been so
Beverly injured that the doctors de
dare her doomed to remain an invalid
throughont her life. She, like so
many other Duchesses, in Eugland, as
well us in France, is the daughter of
a commoner, and it is a peculiar fact
that, although Duchesses are usually
regarded as the quintessence of every
thing that pertains to bluo blood and
aristocracy, yet the vast majority
of them are unable to boast of bluo
blood in their veins, or of being born,
so to speak, "in the purple."
A Strange Power.
It is n curious thing, tho power
which some human beings have over
animals. There is ia Lowell a boy,
differing in no rc-pect from his com
panions, who has tho power in a marked
degree. Every struy dog or cat in the
neighborhood kuows him and loves to
be his companion. A vicious horse,
which the stablemen can with difficulty
handle, will stand like a lamb while he
harnesses and unharnesses him. Tho
doves fly around him nnd in the woods
the wild birds apparently regard him
as a friend and ally.
The most remarkable exhibition of
his power, which has long been known
and commented on by his friends, was
given tho other day. A large and
vicious rat was captured in the stable
in oue of those traps which permit of
easy ingress an 1 no egress. Tho men
who were looking nt thc animal were
weroairaid to go near t'jo trap, the
animal showed naen terror, but tho
boy, when ho behold the imprisoned
creature, leirle.-sly put out his finder,
stroked its bea i, the rat manifeiitiog
as much pleasure as wonld a cat or a
dog. Several davs have passed idnco
then, but. tho stablemen are still afraid
of their capture, but lie hus grown t-o
tame ?iud familiar with the hay as to
allow him to take him out and puf him
in tho trap, will come at his whistle
aud maniie.sis every uppeara ice of joy
at his pre-euco. Th* r.j seems to be no
question that thc boy conl I train that
rat to perform almost any fe.it within
tiie power of such au animal.-Lowell
THE FADED ROSE.
Tho fadod roso I hoi J, lovo,
In fancy blooms to-do
In gardens sweet and ou.,
With memories ot May,
Bo. the frail flower you gave, tovq
Aad friends forever part.
TM* withered bloom is laid, -ovo,
Immortal In my hoart 1
So the frail flower you Rave, love,
Shall subtle fragrance shoJ,
A spirit from tho grave, love,
A breath ibovo the dt?d!
And while this life shall last, lovo.
- Thott*h wintry snows may fall,
Tbls bloom that lln'xs the past, lovo,
Shall bless and brighten all.
-Joseph W. Humphries.
HUMOR OF THE DAY".
Hollo, Brown! How's tby eales
bnsiness? Selling much? "?cp.
[abby-"Yon are worth a million
no." Wifey-"C?n I getan advance
|2 on that million for a now hat.
There's one great drawback to a
? "What's that?" "You havo no
Lo to put things you don't want m.
?And this one?" "Ab, that is a
peless case of water on tho brain.
, labors under tho impression that
is a milkman."-New York Press.
This impotu? lo industry
Meets everybody's likes:
Tho wheels of commerce soon win nu
As busy as the bikes.
' -Washington Star.
Mrs G. (as her husband departs for
dub meeting)-"!* you're any later
tan midnight I shan't speak t > yon !
.-??I hopo yon won't, dear !. -Lon
Merritt-"Man was made to mourn,
ou know." Cora--And what WM
oman made for, pray?" Merntt
To make him do so, I suppose. -
[ew York Truth.
The Tenor-"Miss Hy see, you are
imply talking through your hat.
'he Soprano-"Maybe I am, sir, but
don't sing tbrough ray nose. -
"John, Mamie complained that you
ried to kiss her. Is that true ?" .? Why,
lear, didn't you tell me you wanted
Mt treated just like a member of the
Mamma-,4Where'8 papa?" Flora
-"He's down stairs." Mamma
?.What's he doing?" Flora-"Hxs
bicycle is out of breaffand ho's giving
it some mure."-London Figaro.
And then they both be.?an to sta.?,
Tho k?-y was, 1 think, li Ila',
Sue to.ik ihe alto, May the air,
And I-well. I took my hut.
-New York-Towu Topics.
Ethel-"Do you think Uncle John's
estate will be divided according to law
when he dies?" Couuin Tom (just ad
wuc . ' -\ "Vnt at all-I
Detroit Free Press.
"Oh, Mr. Smyth, your newspapor
jokes are so fuuny I always rea I them
twice." And, niter Smyth had de
parted with his bump of self-esteem
considerably oxten led, 6ho tol l tho
other giris that sbo had to do so in or
der to see the point.-Texas SiftiugH.
Ducks Caug?t With Set*.
Legitimate eportsmeu ia the vicinity
of Eastport, Loug lsUnd, have bo
come greatly incensed over tbo knowl
edge that lately men havo employed
nets in catching tue wild duck which
haunt the bays in this -territory at
night. This practice is in direct vio
lation of the gamo laws and is consid
ered detrimental to tho interests of
the shooters. It had long been sus
pected that nets were being usi'd to
catch the wild duck cn dark nights,
but it is only a fow days since actual
evidence was had of the fact.
A few evenings ago while a belated
party were crossing from tho Great
South beach to tho raaiulaud the-y
noticed come meu drawing into their
boat a largo net, such as is need for
catching flounders and flat fish. In
this netj a number of wild duck had
become entangled. The namoi of the
law violators could not be obtuined.
Tha method ot employing the nets
for wild fowl which divo for their food
is by first removing tho corks and
then allowing it to muk to the bottom
of the bay, Tho birds in diving pro
ject their long necks through the
meshes, and when they become
alarmed and attempt to fres themselves
become caught only more firmly in
Tho feeling against these net set
ters has become so strong that severul
men aro constantly maintaining a.
sharp watch for the guilty parties.
New York Press.
A New Lifj-Saring J)ev?ce.
An interesting devico for insuring
the safety of lives at ?ea has lately
been tried with an encouraging meas
ure of success. It is a new bulkhead
water-tight door. This door is globular
in form, and can be made any sizt,
while it is fitted on a casting forme I
m two parts bolted to tho bulkhead.
A spindle is attached to the door, coe
nected with a 1 ever on deck. Tbe ap
pliance enables a man in tho stoke
hole, on deck or on the bridge to cluso
the water-tight doora instantaneously
by turning a simple lever. The doors,
whioh aro constructed of meta!, aro
Bharp enough to cut through, in their
rotation, any obstacle in their way.
There is, therefore, above each door
an electric bel!, which is turned on as
a warning to those wbo ure about to
pass tbrough the opening that tho
door is to be closed. The bell can bo
turned oft down below, when all tbo
men aro through the opening, -Ameri
ii lass Oven ttiutfow.?.
( A woman has recently applied for a
patent for putting glass in the oven
doors to rd low the process of baking
to be watched without opening the
doors. By this "windowed oven" it is
also claimed that fuel will be saved,
for the continual opec iug and shutting
of un oven door is always Euro to
necessitate tho piling on of more coal.
MOTHERS REAP THIS.
: Flatulsnt Colic, Diarrhoea, Dyson- ?
terr/, Nausea, Coughs, Cholera Ia- f
iantum, Teething Children, Cholera ^
Morbus, Unnatural Drains fronif)
the Bowels, Pains, Griping, Loss of ?
Appetite, Indigestion and all Dis-j?
cases of the Stomach and Bowels. (
PITTS CARMINATIVE c
the standard. It carries children ow'
the critical period o? t?*1^*;/1^
.la recommended hy physicians ?J|
the friend of Mothers, Adults and
CbUdren. It la pleasant to thc taste. I
and never fails, to give saUsfaction.
A few dose* will demonstrate its su
perlative virtues. PrK*. ? et?, per
Lottie. For sale by druggists.
iD?3 WITH THE COUNTRY STILL.
tho samo round sun as lt heaves in
.'ho same bluo sky o'er tho hill;
a song by day and a song by night,
"or God's with the country still !
j tho same sweet moon, with the samo
^nd the stars their splendors spill;
, a song by day and a song by night,
For God's with the country stilt !
s the same old world, with its rosy round,
/Lad the same sweet song bird* trill;
td the storm winds blow, but tho roses
For God's with the country still.
-T. F. Stanton, in Chicago Times-Herald.
riTH AND POINT.
vVhen there is much to be saic on
loth sides, there is seldom anything
Teacher-"How old are yon, Wil
ie?" Willie-"I'm five at home, RIX
t school and four in the care."
One of our builders was asked tho
,ther day if a house of his erected was
ns last. "Yes," he said, "my last,
but not leased."-lit-Bits.
Lives of wheelmen all remind UP,
We may make ourselves sublime,
And in scorching leaves behind us
The policeman every time. TfU,h
Leading Him On: He-"WouId
your mother let you go to the theatre
without a ch Peron??" Sl.e-"Not
unless I was engaged."-Brooklyn
Mrs. Slowpay (enthusiastically! -
??Isn't mv new bonnet a poem? MT.
Slowly'(regarding the unpaid bill)
"Yes, dearest, an ^extended owed. -
"Dearest, if I Tre away.
truooie xor me." "How KO?" "\Vei<,
IM liko to know what kind of a ?-ong
and dance 1 cnn sive my landlord this
"i've quit selling bicycles on tho
installment plan," said the dealer to
an applicant. "Why's that?" "Oar
machine is of such a superior quality
that we are never able to cit h the
fellows that owo us."-Detroit Freo
Spats-"I was introduced last
nigut to Soho's wife, and she h-n a
wouderful command of language."
fc'ocratoots -"Sha cught to have for
she won the first prize in a word
building competition." - Pittsburg
Mamma-"Bobby, I heard you
were a very naughty boy to day.
Now tell nie all about it." Bobbv
(with a sudden access of modesty) -
"Teacher says it isn't polito to talk
too much about yourself."-Harper'?
Unanswerable: Pat-"I tell yon
the ould frinds are always tue best,
alter all, and I can prove*it." Denis
-"How?" Pat-"Where'd you find
a new friend that has shtood by you
as long as the ould ones have?''
Daddy-"You must go to school
regular or you won't learn nuffin."
Cullie-"Did you go regular?" D*ddy
- "?es, indeed. I never missed but
one day." Cullie-"I wunde of you'd
have known euny more thin yon do cf
you had gone that day?"-Harper's
"Are these cakes better or worse
than those your mother use I to
make?" asked Mrs. Newly-Wedd.
"Well, according to the marriage ser
vice, that's what I took you for," re
plied Mr. Newly-Wedd, in noncommit
tal fashion.-Philadelphia North
Uniform Size ol Circus King'.
The one-ring circus of our grand
fathers' day had a ring no larcer than
each of the three used by the big
shows to-day. Circos horses aro
trained to perform in a standard ring
forty-two feet in diameter. In a
larger or a smaller ring their pace be
comes uneven, irregular and unreli
able, and the riders in turning iotner
saults aro liable to miscalculate tho
curve and miss their footing. One of
tho "greatest shows on earth"-there
are several-gave a serifs of perform
ances last year in Madison Squnro
Garden, New York. By fxistako the
rings were made forty-two feot six in
ches in diameter. On the first per
formance three riders fell and ono was
severely hurt ; before the second per
formance the rings were reduced to
the regular size.-Chicago Ttmes-Hcr
An Error of Esl i m alts.
Engineers spent a year collecting
data for their report on tho Con ?o
Railroad in Central Africa which they
asserted could bo built for ?^O??O.'iO:?.
I'iiey now say that the total cost will
oe from S12.00'>,000 to $15,000,000. '
A FBOFEssoB of history is not ne
cessarily a person incapable of telling