Newspaper Page Text
ON THE HOC TRAIN.
Porkers Need More Attention Than Other
Long railroad trains, laden with cta,
tle, hogs and sheep, pass over all of
the leading lines of the country almost
every day. Very often many trains
laden with this live freight pas3 over
thes? roads daily. To a very large
proportion the meat consumed in the
East is brought from the prairie lands
of the West. .
This shipping of live stock means
a great deal of extra work for railroad
men. To the uninitiated a cattle train
suggests no more than an ordinary
freight tn* In of box cars filled with
merchandise. To the uninformed the
famous oyster express of the Pennsyl
vania may mean somthlng, and for
half a minute he may vaguely wonder
how "they can manage to keep" the
oysters fresh on their journey west
ward over the heated land, but the
sight of the long trains of cattle cars
filled with "living beef" is of no .sort
cf interest. The railroad man, how
ever, knows this train has to be han
dled more carefully than even the
Dispatch and care are the two In
junctions in transporting live stock.
The great trains must be rushed as
speedily as possible to their destina
tion, for transportation is a deadly en
emy to prime beef, pigs or mutton, if
there ls too much time taken. Every
day on the crowded, heated, swaying,
jolting cars costs so many pounds of
good beef. Sometimes the long East
ern journey is fatal in its consequences
to animals which'were healthy at the
There is a wonderful difference be
tween cattle, sheep and hogs as pas
sengers. Cattle stand the transporta
tion the best and hogs the poorest.
The rough-looking grunter is a very
indifferent traveler. He may put up
with most everything lese with equa
nimity, but traveling uses him up right
off. Hog trainsoccasion the railroad
ers more worry and trouble than two
or three other trains.
It seems that if hogs are given half
a chance, as it were, they will smother
todeath. They can't stand very well
while the train is in motion, and are
too round to be wedged together up
right, as are the cattle. The hogs lie
down, and the great masses of heated,
breathing bodies pile so closely to
gether that the greatest care must be
taken to prevent wholesale smothering
before the journey is ended.
"Water the hogs" is the order given
the hog train gang, "and water them
oft and well" is added, if the weather
be dry and sultry.
; If the hogs were not watered the
Eastern buyer would rarely, if ever,
receive Western pork fit for killing for
"Whenever the locomotive of a hog
train is stopped for water the hog cars
are slowly drawn along under the great
spigot and its contents turned, one by
one, into each car of the train. The
hogs within are literally flooded or
"so>:sed" with the cooling water. They
lie there contentedly during the pro
cess and grunt our their extreme sat
TIPS' TO THE COOK.
Slice bacon thin, put in a pan in
Bingle layers and cook in the oven un
til slightly brown. It will be an agree
able change from frying.
Put cherry leaves, cut np fine, in
your pie plant pies and they will have
a decidedly nice flavor. A very little
soda put in pie plant or gooseberries
will save sugar and not hurt the flavor
of the fruit a particle.
"When cooking peas use a spoonful
of sugar to a quart and see if they're
In canning berries don't cook them
to 'eath; when they have all become
thoroughly hot through it is enough.
They will not get soft as when cooked
so long. Seal your fruit as hot as
possible, wrap your cans in several
thicknesses of paper and keep in a
cool, dark place.
Make a strong tea of hickory bark,
use a tablespoonful to a pint of
molasses made of sugar, cooked with
it, and you will have an excellent sub
stitute for maple syrup.
Beyond His Beach.
Mrs. Wigger-Why does a barber
charge more for shaving a dead man?
Wigger-Can't talk to him.
A Big Regular Army.
The mightiest host of this sort is the army
of invalids whose bowels, livers and stomachs
have been regulated by Hostetter's Stomach
Bitters. A regular habit o? body is brought
about through using the Bitters, not by vio
lently agitating and griping the intestines,
but by reinforcing their energy and causinca
flow of the bilo into its proper channel. Ma
laria, la Krippe, dyspepsia, and a tendency to
Inactivity of tho kfdnevs, are conquered by
It is not considered profane to speak of a
well-mended stocking as being darned good.
You may not know it but there are large
numbers of people who have made fortunes
in Wheat and Corn during the last few
months. There are equally good opportuni
ties now. Why should you not do so. Henry
3Iugridge & Co., 63 Commerce Building, Chi
cago, make a specialty of advising their cus
tomers on the condition of the market.
Write to them for full particulars. All orders
filled on Board of Trade Floor. Bank Refer
Fitspermanently cured. No fit? or nervous
ness arter first day's uso of Dr. Kline's Great
Nerve Restorer. $2 trial bottleand treatisefree.
Da. R. H. KLINE, Ltd., 931 Arch St, Phila., Pa.
Mrs. Winslow's Soothing Syrup for children
teething, softens the gums, reduces inflamma
tion, allays pain, cures wind colic. 25c. a bottle.
Piso's Cure for Consumption has no equal
as a Couch medicine.-F. fl. ABBOTT, 383 ben
eca St.. Buffalo, N. Y., May S, 180L
Troubled For Two Tears and Health
"I was troubled with catarrh for two
years and my health became very poor. I
heard so much about Hood's Sarsaparilla
that Ldecided to try it and after taking a
few bottles I was entirely cured." A. H.
McDermmot,S5 Bolton St., Marlboro, Mass.
The best-in fact the One True Blood Purifier.
Unnrl'c DUI? curo nausea, indigestion,
nO?U S rfllS biliousness. Price25c.
PREVENTED BT TAKING
"Our Native Herbs"
Sreai Blood Purifier and Liver Regulator,
200 DAYS' TREATMENT $ 1.00
Containing a Registered Guarantee.
32 page Book and Testimonials. FREE.
Sent by mail,postage paid. Sold only by
THE ALONZO fl. BLISS GO.,'.Vashington, D.C.
GRAVELY & MILLER, JJ*
OOO DANVILLE, VA. f
KIDS PLUC AND KIDS PLUG CUT
SBTO Tags and Wrappers and get valuable
?iremtums. Ask your _dealer, or writ? to us
or premium Hst.
DH. SEXTON'S |? Kl ME i TONE cnren ilY?r,
kidney and geaito-urinary tr.ub^r. both *?xes. B>
na-l W-\ ?tarn?? or posta1 note. Addr*.* DH- O
?EX iO'S, UT We? Mittori ?J:, Atlanta, G?.
Teaoh me, Father, how to go
Softly as the ?rassts grow;
Hush my soul to meet the shook
Or the wild world as a rook;
But my spirit, propt with power,
Make as simple as a.flower.
Let the dry heart fill its cup,
Like a poppy*looklng up;
Let life lightly wear her crown,
Like a poppy looking down,
When its heart is filled with dew,
And its life begins anew.
\ UNCLE TIP
7+\ . .
^ By HATTIE
OU won't fergit the
"Ner the simlins?"
"An' you'll dig a
big mess o' sweet
potatoes to bake?"
"Yas, yas, sugar."
"An' cook all the other truck jest
like? I tole you, an' hev ever'thing
ready percisely at 3ix o'clock?"
"Yas, honey, yas."
Uncle Tip Tucket, who sat on a
backless chair in the open passageway
between two log rooms, looked a little
bewildered and clutched at his scant
locks as if to hold onto his memory
ere it should give him the slip, as his
niece rattled off her brisk catechism.
He was a slow, amiable man, with
mild, blinking eyes and wispy gray
Izora Tucket, his niece, was all
briskness, from her quick, bh.ck eyes
to her long feet neatly laced into her
well-polished best shoes. Her freshly
done up pink lawn skirt set out around
her, unyieldingly stiff and smooth
with abundant starching and elaborate
ironing, and rattled crisply when she
moved; her white waist was like tin,
every frill aud fi s sticking out with a
sharp edge to it. Her light, thin hair
was braided tightly and fastened very
flatly against her head, and her best
handkerchief was pinned smoothly
around her neck. '
"Izory, I can't find ary clean han'
kerchuf," drawled a plantive voice
from the room on the left of the pas
sageway, and another frirl appeared in
the doorway, in a costume tho cou?w r
part of Izora's, excepting that .J
skirt was blue instead of pink. This
second girl was younger than Izora,
plumper, more deliberate of movement
and softer of voies.
With a brisk movement Izora flashed
past her into the room, like a pink and
white streak, her skirts rustling
"Wisht yflu'd a-said so before," she
commented briskly, unlocking a trunk
and lifting the lid of a box inside.
"We ain't got any time to lose. I'll
loan you my buff-border one; an' don't
you crumple it up an' tie knots in it
like you done with yourn last Sunday."
The plump girl blushed, and sat
down upon the edge of the bed with
its blue and white counterpane and
stiff, square pillows, and was promptly
pounced upon by Izora.
Git up!" said she. "You're a
mussin' the kiverlid, Susan."
"Izory," said Susan, as she moved
over to the window, "don't you reckon
Uncle Tip'd kinder like to go 'long" to
the picnic, too?"
"Beckon so," responded Izora, who
was giving her mind to the setting of
her white straw hat, with its' pink rib
bons, straw loops, huge, bobbing red
rose and chunky bud, on the exact top
of her he d, where sho secured it by
jabbing a long pin through it and a
strand of her hair.
"Au' I don't see," pursued Susan,
speculatively, "whut'd be the hurt."
"Susan Tucket, air you a idit?"
demanded Izora, wheeling about.
"First place, who'd git supper? Ain't
Gid Tompkins shore to be 'long with
me, an' more'n likely Sam Bean with
you, au' wouldn't we hev to run
scootin' 'round like hoppergrasses a
cookin' supper 'stid of takin' it easy?
An' second place, ain't that long-nosed
old maid Clementyne Plummins bonn'
to be there, an' ain't she got her yaller
cat-eyes onto Uncle Tip, an' hed 'em
there fer the last ten years? She'd of
snapped him up like a jaybird does a
bug, forty times over, ef it hedn't 'a'
been fer me upsettin' her plots an'
keepiv him out'n her way. He's wil
lin' enough to be snapped up, an' once
git 'em at a picnic playin' 'Sister
Phoebe' an' 'Two Tinkers,' an' they'd
be engaged inside of a hour, I'll insure
you. I ain't kep' 'em apart this long
to let 'em git together at a picnic at
"Well, I do'no," drawled Susan;
"maybe they air that a^way. But
what ef they was to? Clementyne
ain't noways mean or fractious. Why,
law! you kin 'most run over her ef
you want to."
"That's all the further you kin see,"
returned Izora, scornfully; "not a
eench beyond yer nose! Don't Clem-'
entyne an' h?r maw live alone, an'
wouldn't her maw live whtuover
Clementyne did, an' wouldn't sh? be
a-bossin' things lively 'round this
house? An' do you an' me want a
gre't big feather-bed of a step-aunt-in
law, er wkutever she'd be, a-runnin'
"I do'no," began Susan again; "I-"
"I do, "interrupted Izora, decisively.
"You ain't got gumption enough to
pound sand. Come along; yonder's
the sun, 'way up. We'll be late."
The fall was a very bountiful one
that year, and seemed to hold all the
sweetness of summer in its mellow
clasp. Down in this out-of-the-way
corner of Missouri no sign of frost had
yet appeared, and the sun was mild
Uncle Tip Tucket stood in the log
"lean-to" kitchen, surrounded by the
generous offerings, freshly gathered,
of the rich, well-cultivated soil of his
thrifty garden. Great round, cush
iony, crimson tomatoes; long, pink
red sweet potatoes; plump ears of corn
in their silken," green husks; creamy
marrow squashes; translucent pods of
wax-beans; broad pods full of butter
beans; crookneck squashes and cucum
bers, were piled about him in hunger
provoking profusion. And still Uncle
Tip stood, with dismay in his face,
staring perplexedly at his vegetable
"Did she say to fry the roastin'
years au' bile the tomotuses, er did she
say stchew the sweet 'taters an' make
soup out'n the simlins, er whut, beats
me! An' she'll be madder'n a wet hen
of I git 'em wrong. Whut's that?"
A ponderous step came up onto the j
porch, and the widow plummins, other- '
wise known as Aunt Dorcas, appeared
at tho kitchen door, with a large, black
sunbonnet on and a teacup. Tho widow
vas stout and slow of motion, and sin
puffed some from the climb up th'
I've fetched back the sody Inor>
oaned me," she announced, settin
che cup down. "I .was a-passin'au.
Teach me, Father, how to he
Kind and patient as a tree.
Joyfully the criokets croon
Under shady oak at-noon:
Beetle on his mission bent,
Tarries in that cooling tent.
Let ma, also, cheer a spot,
* Hidden field or gardon grot
Place where passing souJs can rest
On the way and he their best,
-Charles Edwin Markham, in Soribnor's.
'lowed it'd save another trip. Whut
over's the matter, Uncle Tip? You
look sort o' looney."
"Hit's the supper," explained Tip,
dismally. "The gals is gone to the
picnic, an' their beaux is comin' back
with Jem; be yere at six, an' Izory
she's so' on bevin' supper all ready
when they come. The's light bread
enough-we can make out with-an' I
kin cook ham an' make coffee; but
looky yere at all this yere garden
truck, an' me like a ole woodchuck
fergjttin' how she sayed fer to cook it.
Don't know no more'n that ole Bram
mer rooster out yander how ter fix the
tomotuses, ner beans, ner nothin'."
Uncle Tip groaned, while Aunt
Dorcas untied her black sunbonnet,
sat down and laughed until her portly
form fairly quaked.
"Uncle Tip," said she, "I know
whut Izory is, I know what you air, I
know whut cookin' a meal o' vittles is,
an' I b'leeve I know whut my simple
Chrishen juty to a good neighbor-man
is. Now, you run an' split me up
some good, dry kin'lin's, fill up the
wood-box, fetch me a bucket of water,
an' I'll hev ever'thing goin' before you
kin bat your eyes twicet, an' mix a
pan of sody biskit in the bargain."
The widow seized a gingham apron
of Izora's, tied it about her ample
waist, rolled up her black calico
sleeves, and in a very moderate space
of tim .lad the big coffee-boiler steam
ing, the vegetables baking, stewing
frying or boiling, according to their
various requirements^ a huge skillet
of ham sputtering on the stove and a
panful of bouncing big biscuits all
ready for the oven.
As for Uncle Tip, he was in an
ecstacy of delight, skipping about to
render what assistance he could, doing
the widow's behests with gleeful
alacrity, and commenting upon the
proceedings with wonder and joy.
"Don't it beat you," he observed,
gazing upon the clouds of steam fiom
the various kettles and saucepans with
fascinated eyes, "how slicL. things'll
go when anybuddy takes a holt 'at
knows how? Jest look at them tomo
tuses a-bubblin' up thick an' red, an'
smell them roastin'-years, an' listen at
the ham a-sizzlin'-an' them biskits!
Never seen sich big, nice, saft-lodkin'
biskits-mind I tell ye."
"I'm allus used to makin' biskits
that a-way," said the widow, " 'cause
me an' Clementyne don't ary one
much like crus'."
"Ner me, neither," said Uncle Tip
"Now," said Mrs. Plummins at last,
as she sat the coffee-pot down on the
hearth, "hit's mighty near time fer the
young folks to be polin* along home.
I'll fix the gravy, an' then I reckon
you kin dish np when they git yere,
an' I'll be getting back*."
Uncle Tip's air of pleased animation
vanished, and he groaned more dis
mally than he had before the widow
rescued him from his troubles.
"Aunt Dorcas," said he, "I wisht
ye wouldn't go 'fore supper-an' I
wisht ye wouldn't go atter supper
au' fur as that goes, I wisht ye wouldn't
go at all, 1 do fer shore. Look a-here,
Aunt Dorcas," the little man continued
to rush on, as if, having given expres
sion to his feelings, he was unable to
coutrol them, "I ain't never ast no
buddy to hev me senco pore Pamely
died; not but whut I've 'lowed some
times 'at I'd kinder like to, 'n' I hev
sort o' cast a eye at Clementyne oncet
in awhile, but 'peared like es ef one
thing another 'ud keep a-happenin' to
spile it. Ever' time I'd fix fer it
somethiu' 'nd up an' knock it in the
head; I couldn't never git half a
ohaince to see her, an' looked like I
never would. But after all, I reckon
Clementyne's a leetle too young fer
me. Now you an'me is purty closet
of a age ; 'pears to me like es ef we
was plum suited to one another. I
know there couldn't no one suit me so
good a-makin' biskits, an' no one
wouldn't chop kin'lin's an' pack water
ter you cheerfuller'n whut I would.
'Sposin' we's to jine han's fer good,
me an' you-will ye, Dorcas?"
"Well," said Aunt Dorcas, with due
deliberation,' "bein' es you're so
handy at gittin' kin'lin' an' the like,
an' we both take to the same kind of
biskits, an' my cookin' seems to suit
you so good, I mout think of it."
Uncle Tip hopped a foot high in his
delight, and then caught the stout
widow around the waist.
"Looky yere, Dorcas," said he,
"don't go an' spile it by thinkin' about
it. Let's light right out over to the
minister's yander an' be all fixed tit
the gals gits back. Somethin'll hen
der shore, ef we put it off, mind I tell
you. Ain't I told ye how I couldn't
even git no courtin' done? Au'
things'll git crossways somehow, ef
we wait a minute, I 'most know.
Come, let'-s run right over."
"But Clementyne," demurred the
widow. "She'll git home from the
picnic an' be sheered to not find no
"She'll hev to pass right by the
parsonage on her way," said Uncle
Tip, "an' ef we don't see her our
selves, we'll get 'em to watch fer hei
an' tell her to come right over 'fore
she goes home. Come, now, sugar,
clap on yore bonnet an' let's scoot
right off; we'll fasten the kitchen door
an' run an' git married an' be back in
time to dish up together. Oh, honey,
ef you don't I'll be so mizzable I'll
jest natchelly bust up and go to pieces. "
The widow was not proof against
such eloquence as this.
Six o'clock came, and the girls, ar
riving punctually with their escorts,
beheld Aunt Dorcas emerging from
the kitchen with " great platter of
fried ham surr'- .uded by rich red
brown tb''"1 ^ed gravy, while Uncle
Tip can . skipping after, beaming be
nignly, and bearing in each hand a
plate heaped with the big biscuits.
The table was spread in the open pas
sageway, and from the center thereof
arose a mountain of corn, boiled on
the cob, the long ears even, white,
succulent and extremely tempting.
Alongside stood a large yellow bowl
."ult of stewed tomatoes, thick, dark
red and fragrant with seasoning of
pices and tender green peppers. A
"ige glass dish hard by was piled
>rimful of sliced tomatoes, cucumbers
ind onions, with dressing of vinegar,
.alt and black pepper. Tureens of
/reat fat butter-beans, puffed up with
the buttery richness beneath their
pale green coats, jostled and crowded
dishes of well-seasoned cream-colored
marrow squash. Plates of sugary,
baked sweet potatoes.Jbowls of savory
succotash, and sections of deep gold
crooknecks, baked to glazy perfection
and piled upon platters, filled every
space. The dessert of late-ripened
carmine velvet peaches and sweet net
ted cantaloups seemed almost a super?
fluity amidst the abundance of veget
Miss Olementyne Plummins was set
ting the chairs about the table with
"Walk up, ladies and gentlemen,"
greeted Uncle Tip, jovially. "Lemme
first interduce ye to my wife, Mrs. Tip
Tucket, "Widder Plummins that was,
and my darter Clementyne; an' the
all pitch iu an' eat-eat hearty. An'
ef this yere meal of vittles does come
a leetle grain ahead of time, hit's a
Thanksgivin' dinner an' supper all in
one to this ole boy, fer I'm thankful
to a good, kind Providence, plum from
bead to heel, firstly for a mighty good
wife, an' secondly fer a mighty good
supper. Now light in."
The young men stepped forward as
Uncle Tip finished his little speech,
3hook hands all around with a hearty
good-will, wished the newly married
pair "much joy," and sat down to the
table, according to the invitation.
Susan laid aside her hat, and with
placidly smiling visage kissed her new
aunt and uncle and embraced Clemen
tyne with cousirly cordiality, took a
Beat beside Mr. B?an, and helped her
self to u large ear of corn. Susan was
Dot given to violent amazement under*|
The host and host?s.'- ne^t seated
themselves, and in the slight attend
ing confusion, no one observed the
movements of Izora, who popped into
the left-hand room, pitched her hat
upon the bed, and stood grinding her
heel into the innocent rag carpet and
punching a hole in the plastering of
the wall with her parasol. Her eyes
"Talk of plum idiots!" she ground
-mt viciously, ' 'I'd take firat prize at
the biggest booby show ever was-a
plottin' like I done to keep him from
goin' to the picnic an' meetin' Clemen
tyne, an' yere he's stayed right home
and married Clementyne's maw, sliok
es a whistle, a million times worse'n
ef he'd a married Clementyne herself
-shucks take it! Why didn't I keep
an eye out that a-way, 'stid of watchin'
Clementyne so closet? Well, Jzory
Tucket, bein' you ain't got the sense
of a good-sized June-bug, I reckon
you better go out au' wish 'em much
joy, an' eat your supper-an' mind
yer own business from right now."
Farm and Fireside.
WORDS OF WISDOM.
A good conscience is better capital
than a large bank account.
The golden rule exactly fits into
every honest business transaction.
This is a cold world, and if you^
don't work you'll surely freeze to
What if it is midnight? Every
stroke of the clock brings morning
It was because Job devoted all his',
time to walking upright that he suc
ceeded so well.
You can see a lot more human na
ture in the average street oar than you
can in a Turkish bath.
A man never knows all his mother
lias been to him until it is too late to
let her know that he sees it.
As daylight can be seen through
pery small holes, so little things will
illustrate a person's character.
Nothing suits a cross man more than
to find a button off his coat when his
wife has not time to sew it on.
The man who is determined to have
peace, even if he has to fight for it,
generally gets it without fighting. |.
Next to rolling oft" a log, the easiest
thing is to tell other people how they
Dught to bring up their children.
When a man of opposite views read
ily agrees with you, you have either
succeeded in convincing or tiring him.
- JDo desire what is impossible, and to
be insensible to the troubles of others,
ire two great maladies of the soul.
He who learns the rules of wisdom
without conforming to them in his life
is like a man who plows his field but
does not sow.
There are multitudes of people in
Dur churches who, if knocked off their
"spiritual standing," would not fall
far enough to break any bones.
What a woman should demand of a
man in courtship or after it is, first,
respect for her, as she is a woman; and
uext to that to be respected by bim
above all other women. \
, Attacked by Muskrats.
Charles Kellogg, sou of Town Clerk
Ethan B. Kellogg, of Huron, N. Y.,
while returning home from a neighbor
ing ory-house on Tuesday evening at
about 8 o'clock, through the lower end
of Servant's wood lot, the upper end
of which was on fire, was greatly sur
prised to feel some small animal spring
upon his feet and give him a vicious
bite in the leg. It was too dark to
see what his assailant was, but he
kicked it and struck it with his walk
ing stick. Instead of being frightened
away, it promptly returned to the at
tack, and with it apparently came a
dozen or fifteen more of its kind. Kel
logg kicked and struck at his assail
ants, but in the darkness was unuble.
to see just where to strike or what ef
fect his blows were producing, and
was constantly receiving fre?h bites
about the ankles and legs. A few
minutes of this kind of warfare con
vinced him that discretion was much
the better part of valor, and he took
to his heels. On his arrival home he
was found to be bleeding from over
twenty different bites.
Soon after daylight, armed with a
shotgun. Kellogg visited the scene of
the battle, and there found the bodies
of four dead muskrats, and the soft
ground was almost completely covered
with their tracks. They had appar
ently been driven by drought and the
fire from their holes in the swamp,
and were migrating to Rice's Creek, a
half mile further west. Kellogg will
be laid up for a number of days.-New
*Neckt<e Made From a Snake's Skin.
"Tiri 3 necktie thal. I wear is made
from tic skin oi a diamond-backed
rattler," declared John H. Burgess, of
Bennington, Vt. "It is a souvenir of
my sojourn in the "West. One day,
while riding in the Black Hills, I was
faced by a diamond-backed rattle
snake, which is one of thenfost poison
ous of its species. Being unfamiliar
with the character of the reptile,, I
sprang from my horse and tried to kill
tho snake with my boot heel. The
snake darted at me, piercing its fangs
into my riding trousers. I then killed
it with my riding whip. The snake
had four fangs, and was one of the
largest ever seen in that part of the
Blaok Hills. It was five fe?t long and.
had twenty-three rattles,"
GOOD ROADS NOTES.
One nun ?Ired Million Tons.
About 150,000 tons of broken stone
ire needed annually by Massachusetts
io keep twenty-two hundred miles of
road in good repair. If the roads of
this country ever equal those of France,
100,000,000 tons will be required each
A Prize For the Best Rond,
A prize of thirty dollars was given
at the Howard County, Mo., Fair to
the road overseer having the best five
miles of publio road leading into
Fayette-grading, oui verts and the
average condition of all the roads in
his district to be considered.
From Atlantic to racine.
In his address at the National Road
Parliament General Stone suggested
"A Great Road of America,"to extend
across the continent. He proposes to
build it by its own benefits, with a
temporary use of Government money,
and by the Government through the
territories and its own lands. The
increase in the value of laud along
such a road would cause the property
owners to contribute freely towards its
In some sections of the country
stone and gravel cannot be obtained
for road-building purposes. Under
such circumstances it is necessary to
resort to grading and tile drainage if
there is a season of heavy rainfall, so
that ample outlet may be provided for
the surplus water. This is all that
can be done in some prairie districts.
In suoh localities the grade of the
roadbed must be raised above the sur
rounding level, properly crowned, and
with due regard to the contour of the
adjoining ground. Ro'ad.-grading ma
chines are of great value in accom
plishirfg the work.
Another Sample Road.
The first sample road built under
the direction of the Good Roads Bu
reau of the Agriculture Department
was lately laid at New Brunswick, N.
J. A second one, begun at Geneva,
N. Y., will be nearly a mile and a half
long, macadamized in the centre, with
rolled dirt roads on either side. The
foundation will be five inches of
broken field stone, which is covered
with fine rock siftings, and made a I
firm, compact foundation by means of
a twenty ton roller. On this is laid
three inches of brok an tap rock, which
in turn is rolled so smooth as to be
impervious to water. "The whole
secret of good roads," says Mr! Har
rison, special agent of the depart
ment, "is to make them water-tight
and keep the foundation dry. That is
the reason we use the heavy roller so
much. In the absence of water frost
does not amount to anything." This
road will cost about 810,000, but the
Government supplies only ?500.00,
the balance being furnished by the
National Road Parliament.
The annual meeting of the National
Road Parliament was recently held in
Nashville, many States being repre
sented by ?Iclr?ates. Papers on "Con
vict Labor in Road Building" and
"State and Federal Aid For Road
Construction" were read, and an ad
dress was made on the "Increasing
Interest .in Good Roads." General
Roy Stone, of the Agricultural De
partment Good Roads Bureau, was re
elected -President, and Major W. G.
Whidby, of Georgia, Secretary. Reso
lutions were adopted favoring the pay
ment of road taxes in money, recom
mending State aid, to be appropriated
in each State so as to secure- the co
operation of the townships,-and ad
vising the employment of convict
labor for the preparation of road ma
terial within penitentiary walls, as is
done in California, thus leaving the
construction [[of roads to free labor.
Congress' was also memorialized to
appropriate money for use by the Ag
ricultural Department in developing
good roads throughout the entire
oountry. The next session will be
held in Omaha in 1898.
What Good Roads Mean.
It is impossible to tell in a brief
story the importance of good roads to
this country. We are far behind the
countries of Europe in the matter of
roads, and very largely the boys and
girls of to-day will influence this
movement. It behooves them to in
terest themselves in what good roads
Good roads mean the increased
value of real estate, poor roads mean
a corresponding decreased value.
Good roads also mean a free postal de
livery to farmers in the more densely
populated States; a saving of millions
of dollars to the people in the economy
of transportation; better health and
more comfort; a happier people, and
more prosperous times.
Poor roads, the kind we have to
day, are wasteful. Indirectly they
cost every citizen money. They are
partly responsible for "bad times"
and discontent. They are an indica
tion of shiftlessness and a lack of in
telligence. Poor roads are calculated
to bring shame on those who are re
sponsible for them.
Although a very rich State, New
York is far behiud other Eastern
States in the matter of roads. What
New York and every State needs is a
series of trunk lines or roads-that is
to say, she should have a fine road ex
tending north and south fro'u the ot.
Lawrence to Long Island, and anot?cr
east and west from Albany to Buffalo.
Then, if the adjoining States co-oper
ated, we would soon have a beautiful
road system extending from one end
of the country t > the other.
What a great thing that would be!
Imagine roads good enough to drive
or cycle on in comfort from Chicago to
Boston. And yet this is so great and
rioh a country that we should already
have a fine road system, instead of
having to wait uutil the boys and girls
of to-day grow old enough to soe to it
that our roads are built and main
tained in keeping with those of foreign
Of course, ours is an immense coun
try, and it may be argued we are in
too much of a hurry. But that is not
so. * New Jersey and ol her Eastern
States have paved the way and built
magnificent road systems-systems to
be proud of.
If the States built trunk roads the
counties would soon see the; profits
and advantages to be obtained by
improving their shorter roads.-Golden
Warning to Confirmed Humorists.
"What did you get on it?" Judge
Cowing asked a man brought before
him to be sentenced for stealing an
umbrella. "Rain," was the answer.
Humorists and punsters will observe
that this living menace to the peace of
society received a sentence of two and
a half years in State's prison.-New
Coal at tho Century's End.
Professor Edward Hull, F. R. S.,
estimates that about 58,275,700,000
tons of coal will remain within a depth
of 4000 feet at the end of the century,
OUE BUDGET OF HUMOR
LAUCHTER.PROVOKING STORIES FOR
LOVERS OF FUN.
A Hint-The First Question-Hatrlmonlal
Chat-Reason For Keeping Quiet-He
Most Be-Tho Way They Felt-Econ
omy Ia Wealth-Prudent, .Etc., Ftc.
"We want only good men in office!"
The cry from each statesman ascends;
"And," he'll candidly add,
"The best to be had
Are myself and my personal friends."
The First Question.
"Theosophists say that evolution is
divided into oy?les.*'
He Mast Be.
"What makes you think he is so
"He got a bill through the State
Good Reason For Keeping Quiet.
Mr. Haywood-"Hist! Don't make
a noise! I think it's that young Par
ker eloping with Maria."
He-"You haven't a mind above a
She-"And you haven't any mind
under yours."-Indianapolis Journal.
Economy Is Wealth. '
Arizona Woman (to tramp)-"Then
you didn't cross the desert?"
Battered Bill-"No, mum. I went
around it. You don't catch me wast
ing my sweetness on the desert air. "
Asking Was Superfluous.
Harriet-"And so Frod Dull wich
has asked you to marry him, has he?"
Margaret (sighing and blushing)
"Yes, night before last."
Harriet-"What a stiokler he is for
formalities. "-Cleveland Leader.
Tho Way They Felt.
. "Cornfed-"What kind of clams be
Waiter-"Dem's little-neck clams,
Corn fed-"Little-necks, eh? Gosh!
I thought they was rubber-necks. "
Not Very Nearly Related.
New Neighbor-"Be them Halls
over on the cross-road any connec
tions o' yourn, Mis' Hall?"
Mrs. Hall-"Wa-al, we is jist enuff
connectid so Vt ef anybody dies out
er our fambly the other fambly follers
arter ter the funeral in the larst ker
rige, but don't stay ter the supper."
"Well, prisoner," said the judgo,
"if you have anything to say, the court
will hear you."
"Pd rather be excused, your hon
or," replied the prisoner. "If I said
what I'd like to say, I'd be committed
for contempt of court, and I've got
trouble enough without that."-Har
An Indulgent Husband.
Grimm-"Women are such selfish
creatures! There was an odd chop at
breakfast, and my wife insisted upon
my eating it. It was all because she
wanted to revel in tho satisfaction of
self-denial! A case of pure selfish
Flimm-"And what did you do?"
"Oh, I let her have her way and I
ate the chop. There are few husbands
so indulgent asl am."-Boston Trans
Dangerously 2?ear lt.
"I come mighty nigh swearin'," the
deacon confessed, as he came into the
bouse, nursing a bruised thumb.
? "You don't tell me!" said his wife.
"But I do tell you. I am a-tellin'
you right now. I hit my thumb with
the hammer, and 'sted of sayin' 'By
ginger!' like I most always do^ I hol
lers out, 'By pepper!' I dunno how
much hotter I would of made it if it
had hurt a little worse. "-Indianapo
Letting Him Down.
"I am a self-made man!" grandilo
quently announced the pompous per
son, smiting his swelling chest impres
sively. "All that I am I owe to my
self and my unaided efforts." And so
on, to considerable length.
"Pardon me!" ventured the modest
man; "but what is your weight?"
"Two hundred and ten pounds,
sir, " was the reply. "All solidi self
made man!" ,
"Ah! yes; exactly! Do you know,
by the way, that the estimated weight
of the earth is about 6,049,836,000,000
"I have heard so; but what has tb^at
to do with me?"
"Why, excuse me! But don't you
see how impossible it is that the earth
should tip every time you take a step?"
"I have come," said tho young man?
"to ask for your daughter's hand.
The proud banker gazed over his
glasses at the fellow and demanded:
"Well, have you any means of sup
"Alas! I am poor-but hear my
"When I spoke to Claudia about
coming to see you, she told me it was
useless-that her mother was the mau
of the house, and that I had better go
so far. But I said: 'No! Your father
may permit your mother to think that
she is the man of the house, just to
humor her, but I have seen enough of
him to know that when a matter of im
portance comes up, his strong will
must always assert itself. His strength
of character may not be brought out
by little things -
"My boy," interrupted the old gen
tleman, patting him on the shoulder,
"I have known all along that you were
not one of those ordinary dudes who
are incapable of understanding what
is going on in the world around them.
Take her, and may yon always bc hap
A Frog With Three Hind Logs.
Among a lot of frogs received lately
by Eugene G. Blackford at Fulton
Market was one having three hind
legs, which Mr. Blackford promptly
sent over to the New York Aquarium,
where it was put into alcohol and
added to the collection of freaks.
The third leg of this frog is about
midway between the other two. It is
very spindling as compared with the
others, but it is very nearly of the
same length and it has the same joints
and foot. -New York Sun.
A Sea-Perch Seven Feet Hong.
Au enormous sea-peroh was recently
caught off Aden by some of the men
of the Carthage. The bait used wus
the head of a shark, weighing seven
pounds, and when this was bolted
there was not much difficulty in get
ting him On board, with the help of a
running bow-line. His length was 7
feet, his girth 5 feet } inch, and his
weight 421 pounds.- Westminister
So She ls to '
A Woman's Knowledg
V A woman anders
to. For this reasc
Mass., now known
set to work ~t
After long s
eighths of tl
orders of the
she saw that
down, was i
alone on thc
This was why she prepared her e
has been such a boon to thousands ai
headaches chiefly at the top of the head,
tion, dizziness, sleeplessness, backache,
E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound will
D. EBBERT, 330 Wood St., Reading, Ps,
great power of the Compound.
" Mrs. Pinkham-I can say thai your fl
me of the pains and troubles wh'clr I ha
a very bad che, and puzzled the doctor,
fallen and I had terrible pains in my ba
I could hardly walk. My husband went
ily doctor,, and he prescribed medicine :
I found no relief, and grew worse instea
The doctor examined me and wanted to
operation, but my husband would not co
the advertisement in the paper, I got a b
E. Prnkham's* Vegetable Compound, an
taken half of the second bottle, I felt li
man. In all I have taken four bottles c
entirely cured. I hope that every woma
vice and take your medicine at once."
GET THE GENI
Costa liesa than O
BISMARK'S FINE DOCS. "*
The Creat Prince Has Always Kept a Sup
ply of These Animals.
In Germany; as on the continent gen
erally, the dogs used for hunting large
game, the boar included, are varieties
of the German or Uliiier mastiff or
"dogge," and very ruble animals they
are, albeit of mixed parentage, and it
Is now over fifty years ago that her
majesty, the queen, aeceptsd from the
duke of Buccleugh a Saxon "boar dog,"
called Nelson, and imported by Lord
John Scott from Saxony by that name.
And in a fine painting (by Morely, I
think,) of a group oi the queen's dogs,
Nelson appears as a rough-coated, bad
ly cropped mastiff, of such proportions
that, a Scotch terrier, In the same pic
ture, looks as if it was altogether no
larger than Nelson's head.
This fine animal was the contempo
rary of young Bismark's first hound,
the terror of the peasantry around
Kniephoff, where the parents lived.
This dog afterward acompanled his
young master to the University of Got
tingen, where, we are told, he speedily
made his mark. Once, when Bismark
was summoned to appear before the
rector for throwing a bottle out of his
window, he took his enormous hound
with him, to the great dismay of the
reverend dignitary, who promptly
found refuge behind a high-backed
chair, where he remained until the
hound had been sent out of the room.
Bismark was fined 5 thalers for bring
ing this terrific beast" into the rec
tor's sanctum, in addition to the pun
ishment meted out for throwing the
And* for the sixty-odd years that
have elapsed since then Bismark has
never been without one or more of
these huge cross-bred mastiffs as his
companion or guard. As a law student
and official at Berlin, during his trav.
els in many lauds, throughout his di
plomatic career at Frankfort, St. Pet
ersburg, Paris and elsewhere, as well
as at Varzi and Friedrichsruhe, Bis
mark has always had the companion
ship of one or more of his favorite
dogs. Probably the one to which he
was most attached was Sultan, who
died at Varzin in 1871. Tyras-the
famous dog of the empire-which was
of unusual size and of the slate color
most popular in Germany, was then
quite a young dog, and it was the con
stant companion of its illustrious own
er till the time of its death, sharing
his walks, his rides, his business and
his meals, and keeping guard in his
bedroom at night-Good Words.
A kitchen table, with a deep drawer,
well partitioned to divide the various
requirements for cooking, and with
various receptacles above the table to
hold spices, etc., is called the "cook's
comfort," and such a table, even if it
is a home made affair, capable of hold
ing all the little necessary utensils con
stantly required for cooking and bak
ing, should be found fa every kitchen,
and it will prove a "comfort" to other
members of the household if the cook
lag is thus made convenient.
Three Good 'jDilngi.
Three good things about Tetterine, besides
thc one great, good fact that it cures, are that
it is painless, harmless and has no bad odor.
It is the only sure cure for Tetter, Ringworm,
Eczema. Cures them so they stay cured. No
matter how long you have had them. GO cents
f;ets a box at druggists, or by mail icu- 60 cents
n cash or stamps from J. T. Shupcrine, Sa
A woman's'glory is her tresses. All al o ve
them, at least at the theater, are distresses.
To Cure a Cold in On? Day.
Tako Laxative Bromo Quinine Tablets. All
Druggists refund money if it falls to cure. 25c.
You cannot make a silk purse out of a sow's
ear, but you can go the whole hog.
Beware of Ointments for Catarrh That
as mercury will surely destroy the sense of
smell and completely derange the whole sys
tem when cn te ri nu it through the mucous
surfaces. Such articles should never be used
xcept on prescriptions from reputable physi
cians, as the damage they will do is ten fold
to the pood you can possibly derive from
them. Hall's Catarrh Cure manufactured by
. J. Cheney & Co., Toledo. 0.. contains no
mercury, and is taken internally, acting di
rectly vnon the blood and mucous surfaces of
the system. lu buying Hall's Catarrh Cure
be sure to get thc genuine, lt is taken inter
nally, and is made in Toledo, Ohio, by F. J.
Cheney & Co.. Testimonials free.
t^"Sold by druggists; price, 75c. per bottle.
Hall's Family Pills aro the best.
It doesn't cost much, yet it
adds wonderfully to the
looks. It is youth for a few
cents. No gray
hair. No dandruff.
CHEW 8TAR TOBACCO-THE BEST,
WOKE SLEDGE CIQA?ETTEQ,
WOMAN A MYSTREY.
Phem-Not BO to a Woman.
e Saves Sin. Ebbs rt From an Operation. .
,tands women as a man never can hopo
m Mrs. Lydia E." Pinkham. of Lynn,
all over the English-speaking world,
o help her sex.
md patient investigation, Mrs. Pinkham
r own conclusions, namely: that seven
le sufferings of women are dne to dis
u te ri ne system. Reasoning cn vhis line,
; the only preventive of early breaking
a specific medicine which would act
! female organism.
xcellent Vegetable Compound, which
ad-thousands of women. If yon have
, and are troubled by painful menstrua
and that bearing-down feeling, Lydia
tone np your whole system. MBS. CHAO;
, testifies to the
ledicine has cured
d. My case was
My womb had
ck and hips,
to our fam
for me, but
d of better, i
perform an '
ottle of Lydia
d before I had
ke a new wp
?f your medichie, and can say that I pm
n suffering as I did, will follow my ad
ker & Co.'s
NM CENT a cup,
that the package bears our Trade-Mark.
Saker & Co. Limited,
^ Dorchester, Mass.
Whitevlllo, Ga., writ??
Eave used Dr. M. A. Sim
mons Liver Medicino 15
years for Sick Headache,
Costiveness, and no
woman passing through the
Change of Lifo should bo
without it. It acts on mo
more mildly and thorough?
ly than the "Liver Regu
lator" mode by Zeilin or
tho "Black Draught" made
by Chattanooga Medicino
Nervous Depresi?n of Women.
A woman will o?ien wi thom knowing it
commit slovr suicide for her family. Sao
will thiuk, toil and worry for her children.
Too often they do not appreciate it Her
tirod nerves and weary body at last reach a
stage when she is almost powerless for any
kind of mental or physical work, and she is
depressed and worried over the conscious
ness that she is unable to perform her ac
customed duties. Her organs of digestion
arc disordered and althongh there ls a con
stant disposition to rest, wakefulness and
loss of power to flee p are serions indica
tions of nervous depression. What she
needs ls a course of Dr. Simmons Squaw
Tino Wino to restore a healthy fnnctional
activity and give tone and vitality to her
nervous system. At' the same time the
stomach, liver and kidneys should bc stim
ulated with Dr. M. A. Simmons Liver'
Boll Ground, Go., writes:
I have known Dx. M. Ju
Simmons Liver Siedl?
cine 20 years, and that lt
corea La Grippe, Head-'
ache and other com'?
plaints. I think lt is
stronger than "Zeilin's
Regulator" and "Black
Draught," and that it
gives better satisfaction.
Pains in Lower Baofc. .
After reaching maturity, and especiany
after passing through tho experience of
maternity, most women and their health
seriously damaged, if not entirely impaired.
The painful and weary dragging ana bear
lng down scnsaUon inthc back almost every
woman bas at times experienced. Some
times these are from uterino displacement,
but often they are simply from weakness.
Women who have to bear heavy burdens, to
undergo severo fatigue or to endure crush
ing disappointment, aro subject to this and
many other diseases. Wo cannot too strongly
recommend the ase of Dr. Simmons Squaw
Vino Wine, tho great female tonic and
the dread of the cotton grower,
can be prevented. Trials at
Experiment Stations and the
experience of leading growers
prove positively that
is the only remedy.
We will be glad to send, free of charge,
interesting and useful pamphlets wl?ch treat
of the matter in detail.
GERMAN KALI WORKS?
93 Nassau St... New York. '
57 So. Forsyth St., Atlanta, Ga.
General Agents for Eric City Iron Works
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Steam Water Heaters, Steam Pomps and
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