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WHEN MARK TWAIN WAS A BOY
Trip of the "Innocents Abroad" Com
pared With the Cruises That
Are Made Today.
When Mark Twain, in company
with about 100 other "innocents,"
made his famous cruise abroad, their
progress from port to port .rn this
novel, floating hotel, waa fellowed
with interest by the entire country.
At present half a dozen great steam
ers, each carrying from two to five
times as many tourists, are cruise
In different parts of the work. This
attractive method of travel has be
come a fixed institution. It if curious
to contrast the arrangement! of this
first cruise of the "Innocents Abroad"
with those of today, nearly half a
century later. The Quaker City, the
aide-wheel steamer on whicl the first
cruise was made, carried a few more
than 100 passengers and o:ered only
the most essential accommodations.
The first Mediterranean cruise cost
$1,250 per "passenger, wit many ex
tras. The advance in saf ty and lux
ury of steamers has beer marked by
& corresponding decrease in the cost
of transportation. Today one may en
circle the globe fr/ less than one-half
the fare paid by the "Innocents,"
while a long tpP to the Mediter
ranean, exactl' duplicating that of
the Quaker CW. with a hundred add
ed luxuries, i0sts ody about one
fourth as fUch. Ther- are at pres
ent four irSe steamers, on a single
line, car/inS together 1,400 passen
gers. cf*sm& m the Mediterranean,
South -merica and the West Indies.
Each * these ships is in daily com
jnunrttirn by wireless telegraph and
cab' wIth New York, while the daily
De^paper, printed aboard, keeps the
tc'ists constantly in touch with the
Mark ^wain, it will be remembered,
,rew eloquent in describing the din
ing-room, 50 feet in length, which
eeated more than 100 passengers, and
the melodeon used for concerts and
religious services. Today, however,
?half a thousand tourists can dine to
gether in a palatial cabin, to the ac
companiment of a stringed orchestra
and enjoy a cuisine and^service equal
to that of the best hotels ashore.
Despite the limitations of the Quaker
City, the cruise proved the most sat
isfactory of all methods of travel and
foreshadowed the popularity it would
enjoy in the future.
Women Will Work for Peace.
The determining part to be played
hy women in the war against war is
clear. The militant women we know
today are the mothers of the women
of tomorrow. These women will no
longer be merely the "ministering
?angels" of the past to nurse the
wounded in battle, to weep for the
dead. They will make their influence
?potent in the conduct of the nations,
>and that influence will be for peace.
Never forgetting their ultimate aim,
(always realizing that they must oc
cupy a place in the councils of men,
as equals of men, let women lay to
?lumber their individual present as
pirations and widely awaken their
'broader humanitarian aspirations for
jan achievement infinitely longed for,
" ?um uiJUU'uy mella, bm by aiTfiumari
i ty alike.
r Henceforth, in the home, the school,
ieociety, women must advocate with
<all their powers the union of nations
in a compact that shall usher in the
?dawn of a lasting universal peace.
Through all mediums let them work,
into all existing institutions let them
inject that spirit. Let them create
Institutions if those that exist do not
Something of a Task.
The officer manager turned to the
"Here, George," he said, "go into
the next room and look up 'collabor
ate,' I'm not quite sure about the
. The boy disappeared and didn't re
turn. The manager put the letter
aside and took up some duties. Pres
ently he remembered the boy and
went out to look for him. He found
the lad studying the big dictionary
with great intentness.
"What are you.doing, George?" he
The boy looked around.
"I forgot the word you told me,
Bir," ^e replied, "an' I'm lookin'
through the book to find it"
The manager gasped.
"How far have you got?"
"I'm just finishing the second page,
"That'll do. George."-Cleveland
One boastful woman who thought
herself an ardent suffragist was sur
prised to learn tbat other members
of the sisterhood did not share her
"Why do you doubt my devotion to
the cause?" she asked. "What have I
done to make you think me less earn
est than the rest of you women?"
Their answer was a letter which she
had written to headquarters the day
"You wrote on your husband's sta
tionery," they said. "No?suffragist who
is worth her salt will write a personal
letter under her husband's letter
The Angler-Is this public water for
The Native-Oh, aye!
The Angler-Then it won't be a
crime to land a fish?
The Native-No; it 'ud be a bloom
ing miracle!-The Ta tier.
EDGEFIELD PRESSING CLUB.
I wish to inform the public that
I am better equipped than ever to
do pressing and cleaning of ali
kinds. Let me make your old suit
look brand new. We take especial
pains inpressing ladies skirts. Send
us your garments. Satisfaction
We make a specialty of cleaning
and re-blocking hats, both felt and
Panama hats. Ring Phone No. 35
and I will send for the clothes.
Wallace liar?s, Prop.
LIFE WAS STRENUOUS
THINGS NOT ALWAYS PLEASANT
IN THE STONE APS.
Glance Backward at Domestic Tribu?a
tions of the Cave Dweller Should
Make Us Thankful Times
Away back in the days of the cave
dwellers life must indeed have been
a strenuous proposition.
After you'd chased an antelope 39
miles through the woods and killed lt
with a stone hatchet with an edge like
a grindstone you had to carry it home
39 miles and dissect it with a piece of
flint that was as sharp as a Rugby
If company came to dinner you
couldn't boil a can of soup in a kettle
and serve the delighted guests with
something that made their mouths wa
ter. Not much you couldn't
Instead you'd follow your cave-dwell
ing wife into the back part of the
cave, and she'd say just like your
wife does today:
"Fool! Idiot! Wretch! The very
idea of your bringing people home
when you knew there wasn't anything
in the house to eat! "
Then you'd go out where the com
pany was twiddling its bare legs and
"I'm awfully sorry, ol' man, but
there ain't anything to eat in the
house. Just make yourself at home,
and I'll run over on Stone river* and
see if I can't kill something." You
couldn't even give him that old song
and dance about the grocer not com
You'd have to wander about in the
jungle, and finally, if luck was with
you, you'd kill something-it didn't
matter what. You'd hurry home, and
your wife and the guest would be on
the friendly footing of the walrus and
an algebraic proposition, and the way
she looked at you would make cold
chills run up and down your Bpine.
It's different these days, and much
as we lambast the canners of lima
beans and tomatoes and ham and
things, we have to admit that it beats
the stone age all hollow.
If you bring a friend home unex
pectedly, of course, your wife will look
at you as though you'd contemplated
skinning the baby or robbing a Sun
day school of its collection, but she'll
be able to dish up something!
If everything else fails she can call
up the drug store and get some ice
cream, and lie to the guest, saying:
"It has been so hot we don't eat sup
per now. We usually have cream."
For times have changed since the
stone age, and many of us, forgetful
of our blessings at other times, must
recognize that we are fortunate peo
ples, when the times comes for a com
parison of conveniences.-DallasNews.
For Art's Sake.
"Look pleasant," said the photog
The sitter raised his eyes and gave
a sickly smirk.
"Your head just r little blt^morejp
- w i err, -please?' suggested the voice
from the black shroud. "No, don'l
move the eyes."
Like a man suffering from a stifl
neck, or an Eiffel tower collar, the
sitter tilted his head gingerly till 11
reached the desired angle, and he re
sembled a dying fish 1 trying not to
"That's very nice-very nice, in
deed,", said the photographer. "Stay
just there while I make the exposure."
He removed the cap as he spoke and
counted out one and three-fourths min
utes. "Thank you, sir," he then ob
served. "You can get up. I'm afraid
you've been sitting on your hat."
"My hat," roared the sitter, angrily,
regarding the flattened felt "Why,
the dickens didn't you tell me I was
sliting on it?"
"My dear sir," protested the photog
rapher blandly, "that would have
spoiled your expression" .
All along the woman had maintained
that her little Italian cobbler was
sharp as a tack. The quickness with
which he caught on to who Tetrazzini
ls and what she does upheld her con
tention. He had never heard of Tet
r?zini and he did not know the mean
ing of sing, but all the woman had to
"Italiano woman-sing-la, la, la, la,
la, la," and a glow of comprehension
lighted his eyes.
"Ah, schiamazzree," he said. "Itali
ano woman do that?"
"Yes, fine," said the woman.
But when Ehe looked up "schiamaz
zare" in an Italian dictionary and
found that lt meant to cackle like a
hen her opinion of Raphaelo as a lin
guist and a cavalier underwent a re
Not a Fighter.
"My father," the host Bays, "carried
The guest examines the blade with
interest, and discoverers a stamped
statement thereon, to the effect that
the sword was made in 1899.
"What war was your father in?"
"War? Oh, father wasn't in any
war! He was a traveling salesman
for a regalia house."-Judge.
How Rumors Start.
"What's this about sewing your un
fortunate wives up in sacks?"
"Nothing to it," replied the sultan,
emphatically. "I did get 'em some
Our millinery department is filled
up with all the newest hats and you
can find any style hat you are look
ing for and the prices are about one
half the regular price. C. H.
Schneider, next to Mercantile Co.
For Rent: Two* very desirable
largo front rooms upstairs, gas
lights, hot and cold water. Apply
to N. M. Jones.
For Sale-A good mule. Apply
T. care of The Advertiser.
VALUF OF SEED CORN TEST
Not Difficult Nor Tedious Task and
Adds Materially to Yield-Sim
pie Tester Shown.
An increased yield of corn can be
Becured by testing each ear before
planting and rejecting those ears that
do not germinate or show lack of
vigor or vitality. It is not such a
tedious and difficult task to test each
ear of seed corn as limers are some
times led to believe. Fifteen average
ears of corn will plant one acre using
four kernels to the hill, placing the
corn three and one-half feet apart
between the rows. When the import
Simple Box Tester.
Upon muslin cloth squares are drawn
and numbered, upon which are laid the
grain from each ear to be tested. When
the tester is Ailed the sawdust pad,
Shown at the left, ls placed on top to keep j
the grain moist.
ance of planting ear-tested seed corn
ls fully realized few farmers will
plant corn without first submitting it
to the test
KEEP RATS OUT OF GRANARY
Floor Plastered One and One-Half
Inches Thick With Cement Gives
(By H. M. RICE.)
I had a bin in my granary that I
had been using for corn and oats.
The rats cut the floor so full of holes
that it would hardly hold corn cobs.
I nailed small pieces of boards over
the holes and then mixed up some
cement one to three and plastered
that floor all over 1% inches thick,
first wetting the floor thoroughly. I
have had this bin full of grain sev
eral times since and it is in perfect
condition. The rats have not touched
it since. This bin was only four feet
wide and of course for a large
granary one would have to cut the
cement in blocks to keep it from
MAKE GOOD MACADAM ROADSj
Highway Should Be Crowned in Order
to Allow Water to Run
Quickly to Gutters.
Every macadam road - should be
crowned, in order that the water
falling upon lt may run quickly to the
gutters. It is also necessary that the
shoulders should have the same slope
as the macadam or perhaps a little
For a road 15 feet or ?ess in width
lt will be found satisfactory to have
Section of Macadam Road.
the center 5% inches higher than the
rp1 Ao?mfyor?Bat&r,vc crown of" three-quar
ters of an inch to the foot On roads
of greater width lt will be necessary
to reduce the crown to one-half inch
to the foot or perhaps even less. The
apex should be slightly rounded.
Long, straight garden rows make
Poultry droppings make the fertil
izer for the onion bed.
Sweet corn is a very profitable
crop. One reason for this ls because
lt ls BO easily handled.
Do not plow when the ground is
wet When this ls done the soil ls
compacted into hard lumps.
When clover can be grown, profit
able crops can be grown and the land
kept up by clover and lime.
Beans can be planted any time in
June and some of the quick growing
varieties as late as July 15.
String beans should be drilled In
double rows six Inches apart with just
enough space between to allow for
The onion is akin to the turnip and
cabbage, you must see that the roots
are well in the ground, but need not
be so particular about the bulb.
An authority says that potatoes
should not be planted in hills. It ls
much better to plant them in deep
furrows and keep the ground level.
Prom early spring until August sow
a few rows of summer lettuce every
two weeks or so, and thus try to
provide a continuous supply of good
Potash salts is the general name
given to a group of substances rich in
potash that are mined in large quan
tities about the town of Stassfurt,
Pie plant ls a good commercial
vegetable. The demand for it on the
city markets ls good. It ls little trou
ble and can be shipped well, standing
almost any distance.
The "Princess" is the name of one
of the newest varieties of watermel
ons. These melons are just right in
size to be served whole to one per
son, just as cantaloupes are.
In general, commence spraying po
tatoes when the plants are six or
eight Inches high, and repeat the
treatment at intervals of 10 to 14
days in order to keep the plants well
covered with Bordeaux throughout
Steam Laundry Notice.
My patrons are requested to leave
their Laundry at Jas. E. Hart's old
stand, with Mr. M. A. Parks.
Work sent on Tuesdays and return,
ed Saturdays. First-class work
JAM KS E. HART.
MOTHER HEN WAS RESIGNED
Her Only Son "Entered" Ministry
While Other Children Could Only
Be "Lay" Members.
A motherly hen hatched out thir
teen chicks, only one being a rooster.
Him she named Henry. She tried to
bring them up right and gave them
much good advice.
"Now, chiWren," she many times
warned them, "when the preacher
comes around, you watch out and run
and hide, or you may lose your pre
oious lives. It ls always dangerous
when he stays for dinner."
They heeded her warning for a
time, but finally Henry became care
less, lost his head and was eaten.
The old mother grieved for awhile
but at last became resigned.
"Perhaps it ls just as well," she
mused, "that Henry should enter the
ministry, because the rest of my flock
can never be anything but lay mem
bers, anyway."-Norman E. Mack's
The Serviceable Coat.
Angry Customer-Jacobs, this coat
you sold this morning was so tight
that when I stooped over lt ripped up
Jacobs-Vat for you vant to stoop
Angry Customer-To pick up a ten
dollar bill I saw lying on the pave
Jacobs (triumphantly)-Veli, if der
coat vouldn't rip you couldn't pick up
A Great Athlete.
"Bob" Davis, who is editor of Mun
sey's Magazine and the author of sev
eral plays, not to mention his knowl
edge of birds of passage, is the pos
sessor of a fine sense of humor and a
power of expression that is frequent
ly picturesque. Speaking of a man
who had achieved some distinction as
a killjoy, Davis said:
"That fellow ls a great athlete. He
jean throw a wet blanket two hundred
partis, in any, gathering/;_'
BITTERS AND KIDNEYS,
of corn o
parts of th
than in thc
can read tl
v :v .\ s N ?V.-N .,:>
"I never saw such a rubberneck,"
sneered Mrs. Gabbie. "Just because
the doctor stopped.at our house yes
terday she wanted to know what the
"Yes," replied Mrs. Naybor; "I won
der how she'd like the rest of us to
be that curious about her. You know
the doctor stopped at her house today,
"You don't say? I wonder* what's
the matter there?"-Catholic Stand?
ard and Times.
"A bed of quicksand is the most
dangerous thing on earth."
"I guess you never slept in a fold
As In Duty Bound.
Stranger-But when you have your
system of subways constructed, and
all your passenger traffic is carried
on underground, how? are you going to
Resident-0, the newspapers will
attend to that.
"There is certainly one thing queer
you discover in trying to break into
society on a limited income."
"What is that?"
"That the more you live in a society
round the harder you find it to make
"I'm worried about my boy."
"What's the trouble? Isn't he get
ting along well In school?"
"Yes, but I bought him an airgun
the other day, and he hasn't ex
pressed a desire to go out and kill
With Poor Success.
"Talk about man!" exclaimed the
suffragist. "What has man ever done
"He's furnished her with a model
she's trying darned -.ard to Imitate,"
came a voice from the rear of tha
For Sale: One J. I. Case wood
grain separator ready for use-com
plete with belts. Threshed 10,000
bushels last season. R. M. Winn,
?Plum Bnanch, S. C.
Thia U.-aer waa* ta am>a?
And find the market
unfavorable for your
produce? The farmer
who has a telephone in his home can telephone
first The useless trips thus saved are worth the
cost of service.
Under the plan of the Bell System the service
costs but a trifle; the farmer owns the instrument
and the equipment.
Write to nearest Bell Telephone
Manager for pamphlet, or address #
Farmers' Une Department
SOUTHERN BELL TELEPHONE AND TELEGRAPH CO
SOUTH PRYOR STREET, ATLANTA. GA.
SALE and LIVERY
Plum Branch, S. C, s
I desire to notify j? the public th?t I bave just re
ceived a large shipment of Tennessee mules that are
strictly first class, and my prices are right. Also let
me supply your^needs for horses that are high class in
every respect. We want otar friends to know that
we are conducting a first class1 sale, trade and livery
stable. If I haven't got what you want, I will order
it for you. Call te see me and inspect my [stock be
J. R. & R. L. B0DIE,
Plum Branch, - - - South Carolina
raged by the success of last year's corn contest and in
give additional stimulus to the production of corn in
ty, The Advertiser will conduct . another com contest
Fifteen dollars in Gold Coin
will be given the Edgefield
inner who grows the greatest number of bushels on
?n one acre of land during the year 1911.
\JriU JrXilZiJjs will be given the farmer
ield county who grows the second largest riumber of
)f corn on one acre during the year 1911.
going prizes are offered unconditionally and without embarrassing
ated restrictions. The contestants can plant their corn when they
ilize it as they please and cultivate by whatever system they please
> requirement is made: The acre must be in one continuous plot of
? not composed of two or more rich spots selected from diff?rent
ie farm. The area planted must NOT be less than one acre.
s for measurement of the land and corn next fall will be more rigid
) past contests, and will not only be printed on the judge's eertifi
will be published in several issues of the paper, so that everybody
lem and become familiar with them.
win the Gold this Year
will be awarded at the County Fair.