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The Newberry herald. (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, February 22, 1883, Image 1

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ti".sI. ,Y s 1 .Y q~ u t Fdr, 1,y r _ t .,rfa'"' i .*.<r K.i 't}p. "
A Faily Companion, Devoted to Literature, Miscellany, News, AgrictdIture, Markets, &e.
AFmVol. XIX. NEWBERRY, S. C., THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 2, 1883.No8
7. 7
> P ' THRSDAY MORNING,
r t Newberry, S. C.
- E dtor and PJoprietor.
{ erms X.2O@ per Jnmunea,
invariably is Advance.
Tperis stopped at the expiration of
.j ti fer iaoh i i paid.
The ;4 mark denotes expiration of
Gi_ST AND BBST
STOCK 4)F
LOTHING
EYER EXIBITED IN BEWBERRY,
OAN BE FOUND AT
R=: t i ,, CuIPPOCb S,
Ivery Article in the Lime of
- GENTLEMEN'S WEAR,
FROM A FINE PAIR OF
Shoes up to a Hat.
UNDER WEAR a Speeialty.
.{A FINE ASSO. ..ENT OF
Clothing for Youths
Announcement No. 11
e .wil ofer speckT inducements; for the
sixty days, to all wbo may waut
Ready-made. CIotIing or Furni..big Goods,
j -Boots, Shoes &c. Our bargain table
' repleuisbed by - adding. thereto
Sinoodstyles and itbot
abroken sits"al of which - will
gorgiven away, without regard to
This 'fature is e'pecially full in
a and Boys' Clothing. Call and get
-Overoats for Men, Youth and
s low as two dollars.
RIGHT & J. W. COPPOCK.
n.4, 1-tf.
MYisceuaaneens.
S lE OU A S ARE COMING
~-AN 19 1ow Ts INE M TO PEE
N EEPAR FOR THEM.
"NEST VARIETY 8F TROPICAL FRUiT IN
MARKET,
refFsk Oranges Every Week.
3ANANAS, .
SCOCOANUTS,
SORANC~ES,
MAL.ACACRAPES,
4.Northern Fruits.
Peanaxts,
Citron,
-Curranits.
Ora&rs filed wa :. dispatch.
; . BART & CO.,
CHAuLsTO, S. c.
SSUBSCRIBE FOR THE
WEEKLY PALMETtO YEOMAN,
COLUMlilA, S. C. -
[tis an 8 paigu paper, des ignbd for the peo
g 3. iled wi:.a interesting matter-Farmily
n News, Markets, &c. Sn'eciron:
no $ar 1 50; Sceue MIouths, $1.00:
n Thee Mo)nths, 50 Cents-pyable in ad
Svance. ForSxNaeanNneDlrsn
-Extra Copyfroe er pciesfr
~mishea. The DilLY YEOMIAN, an atr
n.. oon paper, is St a year.
- C. M. .McJUNKIN.
S40--t Editor and Puhlisher.
Ciukbbed with the HT:aLD, at $3.25
K 880, t880.
CftAN9IGEN'tRX ROTE1L,
-coLU3ImA, s. C.
TROKOUGULY RE1NOVATED,
EEFURISHIED AND9 REFITTED.
JOIN T.WILLEY, Propriet'r.
Not. in 4- - i
I OR
NirOVELS
SFor the Seaside, Chimney
Side, Sunny Side, Shady
Side, Right Side, Left
-Side, or any
other sidle.
Alrge ltjut reeived atRtE .
Jeb. 5, 6-4t
JSTON DINNEaL liOIS.
?aasengers on both the up and down
~trins have the usual time for DINNER at
*-IAiuton, the junction of the G. &l C. R. R,
and the S. U. & C. R. R.
Pare well prepared, and the ch.rge rea
somable. MRS. V. A. ELKINS.
WRIGHT'S HOTEL,
COLUMBIA, S. C.
This Da a.'.'lP1rnI e. w1t,b ith, all
n odern implrea -- "u*: is ' i '. ' .Pea for the
Mar. 19. 19 -- P" r'*'or
DR. E. E. JACKSON,
SRh[g?IST AND JilMIST,
COL.UMBIA, S- C.
Bnoveo toe * * tw doS* et* o
~0Wheeler.House.
Orer pomody atteded-o
Apr. 11 16-if.
.lisceuneous.
I Can Teil Ye Now to Be
Your Own Doter !
If you have a bad taste in your mouth,
sallowness or yellow color of skin, feel de
spondent.stupid and drowsy. appetit tn
steady, irequent headache or dizzlness, you.
are -billous." Nothing will arouse your
Liver to aot on and strengthen up your sys
tem equal to
SIMMONS'
HEPATIC
COMPOUND
Or Liver and Kidney Cure.
REMOVES CONSTIPATION.
RELIEVES DiZZINESS.
DISPELS SICK HEAD ACHE
ABOLISHES BILIOUSNESS.
CURES JAUNDICE.
COEES LIVERCOMPLATNT.
OTERCOl1 'A LARL&L BLoOD POISoNING.
REGULATES THE STOMACH.
WILL REGULATE THE LIVER.
WILL REGULATE THE BOWELS.
THE LIVER AND KIDNEVS
Can be kept perfectly healthy In any cli
mate by taking an occasional dose of
SiMMO S' REPATIC CoMPOUNJ.
THE GREAT VEGET aBLE
UVER AND KIDNEY MEDICINE.
DOWIE & MOISE,
WHOLESALE DRUOCSTS
CHARLESTON, S. C.
Aw FOR SALE EVERYWHERE. .
- And in Newberry by Dr. S. F. FANT.
Nov. 2, 44-ly.
WANTED,
15,00 TON S COTTOR AmnD.
Highest cash prico paid for Cotton Seed
delivered in car load lots at any R. R. Do.
pot or Steamboat Landing in South Caro
lina, Georgia or North Carolius. Highest
as. price paid for Kerosene, Lard and
Whiskey Barrels.
FOR SALE,
COTTON SEED MEAL.
'he .est and cheapest food for all kinds
Df stock, and the cheapest and best f.-rtilizer
en the market. Write for pamphlets con
Luing analysii by Dr. C. U. :hepp.rd,
stato 4h:-.1. ,nS directions for u-e, to
t'iil a:L.E.-T0,% OI L M'F'G. t'i.,
.S ihrol u1'., Ch arIe ,u , t"0.
Dec. 7, 49 - Sm."
GERMAN KAINIT,
(Direct importation.)
PERUVIAN GUANO,
(Dir, ci from the A.T-rt of the Peruvian
FISH GUANO,
(t to 8 per cent..Amwonii) '
Nova Qcotia Land ,Plaster.
SOUTH CAROLINA GROUND
PHOSPHATE,
ui:.e -round And of high grade.
For sale by
HEItMANN BULWINKLE,
ER'S WHAEF,
CHARLESTON, S. C.
Books andl Stationery.
Keep it Before the Pubk,
The largest and best stock of
BOOKS, STATIONERY
L ANDO . 4*
FANCY ARTICLES
Ever shown in Newberry,~at the
Riuiu NOK !IOh
/Comprising in part
glaak Books,- Memorandum Books, Pocket
Books, School Books. Pict'tre Books,
Hymn Books, S'crap Books.' Bibles,
Catechisms, invoice Books. Mis
cellaneous Books, and other
kinds of Books.
Phioto. and Auto. Alburbs, Visiting Cards,
Plain Cards, Christmas Cards, Reward
aed Boad ritol Boad
A B C Blocks.
WritmrPapers-such as Note, Letter, Cap,
Legal' Cap, Bill Pacer--wide and nar.
row. Inks-black, blue, le red,
Envelopes, al sizes and
Backgammon Boards, Chessmen, Domi
noes. Checks, Games, Toy Paints. Slates,
toy and plain. Rubber Emngs. Era
sers, Chalk Crayons.
'ancy Papeteries, Colored Paper. Tissue
Paper, Gold and Silver Paper, Writing
Deaks, Work Boxes. Noah's Arks,
Pens, Tags, McGill's Fasteners.
A nd many other articles not enumerated
Dall and see them.
CH EA P FOR C.AS!H.
Thos. F. GRENEKER,
PROPRIETDR HERALD BOOK STORE,
Nov. 30, 48-tf.
-ky to Msket B W eadforlt1
D. M.FERRY & CO. DETRorr M10os.
11e.. 1.4,..R a
t
THEN AND NOW. t
"i wish I were a boy again!" ~
Thus wrote a pensive bard,
But 'twas a foolish wish to pen,
Though trouble -,ressed him hard. C
Oh, who to childhood would retoru,
Repeat his caequered years;
Once more their rigid lessons learn, 1
Of turmoil, toll and tears?
What brighter pages would be traced
Within the book of time;
What record of wrong words erased
What deeds show more sublime? C
Alas, the human will is weak
To curb the passions wild;
Man may not thipk or act or speak
With usare uudefiled.
And should he tread life's path again, I
Not all the garnered lore,
Reaped from the harvests that have been,
Would make him err no more.
t.
fhe same temptations still would rise
To tempt his fickle clay;
The same dark cliuds obscure the skies,
The same snares fill his way. ]
And thee, as now would he repeat -
The follies of the past; a
Rurl prudeoce from its regal Fest, b
And truth behind hitu cast.
No ardent lodgings can repair a
The moments fled away;
But those may be improved with care
That come to us to-day. C
* a
Ihey tear adown time's rushing tide,
L'Ire ships, a precious freight.
That must, for weal or woe decide
Men's everlasting fate.
-Waverly Magazine. e
0
a
Special Correspondence to the HaaLD.
ALL ABOUT BALTIMORE. O
p
BALrmouE;, Feb. 3, 1883. t
Baltimore is the Boston of the '
South. Here the industrial, social,
and intellectual interests of the a
Southern States reach their highest a
development just as in the great It
metropolis of New England the l:
economie and higher interests of tI
the Pgritan commonwealths culmi- a
nate. But how different have been 4
the or'gin and growth of these two A
great capitals of the cavalier and It
roundhead !0
Just two hundred and fifty years
ago Charles I, granted to Cecilins, t
second Lord Baltimore, a charter to n
settle that portion of America now
partly embraced by the' State of t
Maryland. The new province was i
called Maryland in honor of the u
King's consort, Henrietta Maria.
While Lord Baltimore was a devo- b
ted Catholic, he had sufficient1
adroitness to recognize that a purely
Catholic, colony was impossible ~
0D
under the then existing state of g
affairs. In order, therefore, to build s
up his colony as rapidly as possi- 1
ble, he adopted a most liberal pol
icy. "No person within this pro-1
vince," says an old law of Mary- ~
land, "professing to believe in ~
Jesus Christ, shall be in any way,s h
troubled, molested, or discoun- g
tenaced for his or her religion, or
in the free exercise thereof.". Found- tJ
ed upon such broad and liberal e
grounds the success of the colony d
was only a matter of time. From '
the circumstances of having a Cath. g
olic at its head the Catholics ri
naturally outnumbered the members ~
of the other Christian sects in the ~
colony, but harmony and concord a
prevailed. Settleinents were made ~
in different parts of the State and P
at length, in 1730, the foundations of a
the city of Baltimore were laid.
The town was called Baltimore, in 0
honor of the liberal proprietor of a
the Province, Lord Baltimore. The
colors of the Stats aud city, black tI
and yellow, were borrowed from the n
colors of Lord Baltimore. It is t<
owing to the resemblance of its fi
plumage to the colors of(Baltimore il
family that the beautiful yellow- b
black oriole is termed the Baltimore t]
oriole, and not from its being f:
found in the vicinity of the me- a
tropolist of Maryland. From the ti
time of her foundation to the pre- il
sent period the growth of Baltimore ti
has been steady and marvellous. ti
To-day the eity contains a popula- I
tion of nearly five hundred thou- 5
sand. On the streets one sees peo- ti
pIe of the most varied description b
and nationahty. The proud old b
Marylander or an ancienrt and ti
buried regime, the independent ki
Celt, the quiet German, the swarthy a
Italian, the almond-eyed Chinamnan, ii
and the erjioked American citizen ii
of fourteenth amendment origin all tV
npun and re-pass each dther on- the g
reat thoroughfares. The city oc
upies a most advantageous posi
ion, situated as it is between the
wo great sections of the country.
t is also the nearest Atlantic port
o the great wheat fields ofthe West.
onsequently, Baltimore will one
lay seriously interfere with the trade
f New York; and Philadelphia, sit
ated between the two rivals, must
e contented to remain a simple
ianufacturing town. The Broad
ray of the city is Baltimore Street,
rhich runs east and west across the
ity for a distance of some six
oiles. Streets which intersect Bal
imore Street are divided into
wo portions, Northern and South
rn. Thus -Charles Street above
altimore is North Charles Street
nd below it is South Charles.
ones' Falls, a small stream about
iree times the size of Bush river,
ivides the city into two parts called
last and West Baltimore. The
opulation of East Baltimore is
rrgely composed of workingmen
nd foreigners, It is Amasoka on a
ig scale. No one can live in Bal
more and suffer for want of fresh
ir. There is Druid HiL Park, one
f the finest natural parks in Ameri.
a containing nearly one thousand
cres. Its huge trees of oak and
hestnut; its grassy meadows and
illsides; its quiet ponds and lakes,
rhose placid waters are disturbed
ver and anon by the races of the
entle wavelets as they chase each
ther from shore to shore; its firm
nd smooth drives and walks which
ind in the shady groves and then
ut again, all afford relief and
leasure to the sous and daughters of
>il as well as to wealthy indolence.
'hen also there are Patterson,
'ederal Hill, Harlem, Riverside.
nd Franklin Parks with their many
ttractions, and squares and greens
Imost without number. Baltimore
s called the monumental city from
ic great number of memorial
:afts- which testify to the worth
ad character of those whom they
re designed to commemorate. The
irgest of these monuments is the
ne erected to "the Father of his
ountry," and which has an alti
ide of 212 feet. Battle mouu
tent, Wells and McComos monu
ient, Odd Fellows memorial and
ie Poe monument, are all attrac
ons worth seeing, The Pde mon
ment was erected in the West
,inster Presbyterian churchyard
y the public schools of the city, in
B70, The. monument is marble
uroughout and rests on a granite
ase. A medalline portrait of the
ifted genius is chiselled on one
de of the marble and the simple
ascription "Edgar Allan Poe, born
auuary 20, 1819; died October 7,
)49" tells whose remains sleeps
eneath it. But Edgar Poe needs
a monument except the one he
~inself -. created. Clio never for.
ets a good poet, and it has well been
tid that on the "dusky wings of
xe raven Poe wili sail over the
iasm of -oblivion." The Metho
ist. Catholic, and Episcopalian de
rnminations are the strongest reli
ous sects in Baltimore. As a
ile the citizens of the Monumen
ii City are great chech goers.
ireligion as in polities the people
re conservative to a degree,amount
g to a fault, Very few cities
assess such immense educational
dvantages as those enjoyed by the
gueen city of the South." Some
r the finest schools in the country
re inclosed by its limits.
Much has been said in praise of
e beauty of the fair sex of Balti
iore. Their radiance has been ex
>lled by visitors to the city both
om other American cities and those
distant lands. Not the half has
een told. Each generation sustains
ie reputation of the beauty of the
Lir sex. Ballimore girls are the belles
t the 'watering places and seashore;
1ey relegate other girls to the paper
iga nd plastering, when at recep
ons abroad, and they make even
ie courtiers of the gilded thrones of
urope proud to win one of their
miles, If any man lives under
le delusion that no woman who
reathes .can capture the citadel of
is anections, let him stay away
*omn Baltimore, if he desires to
eep up the delusion. The country
round Baltimore for many miles
i settled very thickly. "In fact i't'
Ssometimes dficult to tell where
wn, ends and county begins. A
reat dAnal han been ai in the pa
pers recently about the small pox
in Baltimore, It has been called
"the doomed City" "the smitten
City," "the plague stricken City,"
and other names indicative of dire
misfortune. There is small pox
in the city, but the circumstances
have been most outrageously dis
turbed by the papers of other cities.
The authorities have succeeded in
confining the disease almost en
tirely to one portion of the city.
By adopting the proper sanitary
precautions, one is as safe in Balti
more as in other places. Nearly
every one has conforned to the re
quirements of the law in regard to
being vaccinated. A yellow flag
is compelled to be displayed from
the front windows of every house
infected with small pox. It is al
most needless to say that residences
so decorated' here have few callers.
A countryman in the city the other
day seeing the sallow banner float.
tug from the window of a house on
Pine Street took it for-an auction
sign and most vigorously attempt
ed to get into the door. When in
formed of the situation he beat a
most hasty retreat and never stop.
ped until he got safely home nor
has he been seen since. Blessed
by nature with a magnificent liar.
bor; possessing a large and diverse
population; containing all of the
social charms so cfaracteristic of
the South; and surrounded by
so many noble institutions of learn
ing the prospects of Baltimore are
most bright. It is destined to be
come even a greater city than it
now is. It is still growing. And.
the opulence and refinement of its
citizens; the aristocratic appear
ance of its architecture; its streets
with their look of elegance; and the
dignity and character of its women
will cause it ever to loom up in the
horizon of history as the social
Athens of America.
MAYREA.
Foa THE iIIALD.
FRu11 AN NASHVILLE C019
RESPONDENT.
MEssns. EDITOns-Suffer me to
present to your readers through
your valuable journal, a short ar
ticle on Vanderbilt University.
Having many friends in Newberry
who are interested in the great
cause of educatiou your correspon
dent has thought that a few words
in this direction might prove in
teresting to some at least of your
numerous readers.
On the 15th of Jan., I bade fare.
well to many friends (of whom I
shall always cherish a warm recol
lection) and took the cars for Nash
ville, Tenn., at which place the
University is located, reaching the
end of my destination on Thursday
morning following. I was convey
ed by hack to the beautiful grounds
of the University' situated in the
west end of the city, a short dis
tance beyond the corporate limits,
and reported at Wesley Hall-the
home of the Theological students.
Upon entering the building I was
greeted by a young Chinaman who
is in the Biblical Department
preparing himself to preach the
blessed gospel or Christ in his na
tive. land. I next met that univer
sally beloved and eminent divine,
A. M. Shipp, D. D., dean of the
Theological Department, who fills
the chair of the late lamented Dr.
Thos. 0. Summers.
Vanderbilt University owes its
foundation to the munificence of
Cornelius Vanderbilt, of New York.
who on the 37th of March 1872,
made a donation of Five Huundred
Thousand Dollars. This amount
was subsequently increased until it
reached rhe handsome sum of One
Million Dollars. In this munificent
act Mr. Vanderbilt has become a
great factor in the cause of educa
tion, and erected a monument to
his name that his posterity may
well be proud of. Would that other
moneyed men of our country would
become inspired with the same
spirit. Therc are not many Van
derbilts, it is true, but there are
men who would in a measure re
lieve the - struggling situation of
our Colleg'es.
The University is divided into
six distinct and separate depart
ments, each having its.special fac
ulty of instruction, to wit: Aca
demical, Biblical, Law, Medical,
Pharmc and DentaL. There are
abont air hndred stnulant. in the
-boti"Good enough, Want aotten.
inches of -notice free, don't you?
Family. history, how your. grand.
father blacked Washington's boots;
nee; mentioo yourself as a mem
ber of a circulating library, ehurch I
co-operative store, base-ball club 1
and other important positions."
The customer said-he did not
care for any notice.
"Of course," said the clerk, "you f
want a paper sent to each member
of the firm, one for yourself,and
the privilege of takiug half. dozen
copies off the counter for the net
year or two because you advertise?"
The gentleman expected to psy,
for his paper, and asked the price:'
of the advertisement.
The delighted clerk figured it upp
and then'asked:
"If we send you; the bill around
in - about a year, you. can tell the
boy when to eailagain, can't yoa?"
"No, .I wii pay younow,"sad
the other,. takin out a.rol of bi* i
" The newspaper man'aye bulgsd
as he said .
"Ah! you want seventy-fire e
cent. discount and twentyper ct
off for csh?"
"I am ready to pay a fairprice
for value, received, Tell me your
regular rates, and here the
money:'
'A beatiflexpressionspead
over the wan face of the worncdnk
as he'murmured
"Stranger, when .td you c 4ee
down, and when do you expect t "
Apostles along?"
TUE RiCAeVaM ER
Book canvasser (entering in e
sponse to the "Comein".ofgenae
man at desk)-"I teg pardon,
Gentleman at desk- a ae I
it, sir-not required-g . e "
you-what have -yoa todsg!
come, come, sit down gd'ye know
rm always glad to hao+eyrep
in-always have s h ligb :
and fresh--what -a it-Siakes
peare in ninety-nine arts-oe dl
lar a part-Milton-War ofthe
bellion-spleandidly ~ s
Book canvasser --"Etese~ me,
sir; but I am keepig you fom
your business."
Gentleman at dee-"Not at ale
-dont mentionit-leasurerbefore
business, you know-out with it
what is it?-'ives of-Rnnnt De
cons'.-profusely illusrated- por
traits from- life-any kind of binda
ing I want-royal Oesvo) heavy
laid paper-large, clear- prit
twenty parts-ten pictures in eachE
part-"
Book:-canvasser-"BesHly, sir, I
rear I am taking too miuch of your
time."
Gentleman at desk-Nonsesse *
-what's time to your company?- g
want me to subscribe to give the ,
gent, and all that sort of thing
everybody 'll want it when they see p
my name-Bev. Jonathan Textual i
Deacon Jones, 'Squire Pighead, al- a
ready subseribed-going like hot
eakes-literary folks-gone crazy
over it-all want it-bound to have u
it-" ' - *
Book canvasser (rising)-Beally, r
my dear sir, I must no longer in
trade."
Gentleman at desk-"Fudge 1- 1
sit down-take off yourbo6ts-Jinme sj
bring slippers for gentleman- 4o
won't hear of your going-have a
lunch sent in directly-make up a
bed for you to-night-can't spare o
you for a week at least-want to tj
know all about that book-all your e
books-going to subscribe forf em
all-have a chat first-like to talk
with a canvabsser, you know-jolly i
set-little modest, but no matter- il
ain't going?"
Book canvasser-"Yes, sir; come
in when you ain't so busy."
Gentleman at desk-"WeU, if
you must, you must-confoundedly
mean, though-go off in this wag-a 1
don't give a fellow a chance to1cpl
at you-make yourself too-cre
send for cigare-onhly waitamn
ute-Qoknarid.) ByGes!e
he's gone-too#beI liendid fel.
low-.Iways la to see'em
woift -stop-to tiind4-no Iaeek?
And a takes pei ps
various departments. All the States
are represented, while ther'e are sta
dents . r, from the other side of
the Atiatie. The patronage is in
creasing y. arly, Vanderbilt is yet
in its ilancy and is destined to
become one of the first institutions
of learning on the American Con
tinent. W hile under Methodist;ov
ernment it is nonsectarian, all of
the other denominations are fairly
represented among the students.
The grounds of the University
comprise seventy-five acres, suita
bly improved with roads, walks,
and about one hundred varieties of
shade and ornamental trees. In
side of the grounds, sleeping side
by side, lie the remains of Bishops
McKendric, Soule, and Dr. Thos.
0. Summer, with a handsome mon
ument erected to their memory.
The University building, devoted
to general University purposes; is
an imposing structure, built of
brick four stories high, with gray
stone trimmings and heated through
out by steam and lighted by gas.
It is admirably adapted to all its
purposes. The Science building
has a central location on the
grounds, three stories with base
ment. The basement contains the
heating machinery which supplies
the various buildings with steam.
The Gymnasiun is a handsome
structure of beautiful architectural
design, here the students are train
ed in physical exercise. This is a
capital idea, and is productive of
much good. Students very often,
for the want of sufficient bodily
exercise, seriously injure their con
stitutions. It is almost a certain
fact that young men while at Col
lege will overlook this important
matter, a sound mind to a greatx
tent depends upon a sound body.
The next feature in connection
with the University is Wesley Hall,
designed for .the Theological De
partment, for purposes of instrue
tion in that Department and to pro
vide homes for theological students.
It will accommodate two hundred
students with domestic department
of proportionate capacity. The struc
ture is of brick, has five stories
with basement.. The building is
said to be one of the finest ofthe
kind in the South. Bishop Mc
Tyeire, stated in an address before
the students. Missionary Society a
few days ago, that when Wesley
Hall was under course of erection,
some one remarked, "Bishop you
are making this tower entirely too
fine. If you domesticate young
men in that elegant building they
will never do to send to 'Black-Jack
mission."
Taking Vanderbilt in all respects
it cannot be surpassed as an institu
tion of learning.
South Carolina is represented
here in all Departments. It is
a consolation to me that so many
South Carolina's boys are here. I
would say-to all young men in New
bery, interested in their education,
that if they desire first-class ad
vantages, come to Vanderbilt Uni
versity.
.H. M. GILBERT.
AN EXTRAORDINARY AD
VERCTIMER.
"I would like to have an adver
tisement inserted."
This a slogan that would resur
mect a dead man behind a news
paper conDter, and the clerk turned
as if moved by an electric current
and-ejaculated :
"Yes, sir; want the top of the
column, I s'pose?"
"No; I am not particular," said
the advertiser.
"Want it inside, next leading ed
itorial?"
"Either page will answer," re
plied the other.
"Want a cut of death's head and
marrow bones to make it atractive,
or a portrait of the advertiser with
long hair and a turn-down shirt
collar?"
"Clear type, black ink and white
paper are good enough 6pr me,"
was th@ response.
"All right; want head-line in
type gn inch longer than Jenking
ad. in next column, or will you
hav-e it put upside down, or your
name in crooked- letters like foked
lightning all over it?"
"No; a plain,:stIaightforwaiifad
vertisemenit; in space of fwji&dsa,
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