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PICKENS, S. C., T.HURSDAY, DECEMIBEI 11D 84 ni
- A Boy's Conclusion.
If I had a coch antd horses eight,
I would choose to ride on the farm-yard
The big, red gate, with its ilvo strong bars,
The tippiest-topinost tip to he Ftnrs.
It swirigs so slowly against tihe grrtass
Wheon lnto the tnondowy the 0:1tt a pass,
I hldh ou tight,-1,1 tit b'lln not nafrni<d,
WVhen Jerry, the eleverest iellow mado,
Tugs it slowly bnck, with "Comnte
This is the way they go to Itorie.''
Yet had I a conch anti hors-.s (light,
I'd be too grand for it fariui-yard gute.
I should wear new j:okots tho wholo year
And never go barefoot. Why, I'll be bound
The President hasn't miuch better fun
Than a boy when his mother says, "You mny
I sit astride of the.farn-yard gato
Ant innke bolreve I inn onething grent;
That I ou I he wend lot, the river, the mill,
The house quirc Eih"r buitlt on line il;
That pitir of p,onles Miss Efiler tries,
And all the Iuffy Elias buys;
Or i've Just come back from an Idian war
(Thgt's why tho 1lag's on tho school house
It's g"oing to he Fothrth of July n week I
T'ho ,Ipy old ennnoi will have to sl>enk.
If I haid a corich and horFes eirht,
I'<I like to drive it through such a gate,
Stupi< old fellows tni! sit sIt insiie,
The <-oaelhinan has tne I o-t of the ricle.
Oh, thi way I'd niannie the reins and wiiip
"Stoatly therel even I" int i s:1t.
Woul<n't litrry and waeit 'stre?
Unt,tnin Ihuncoune wotl:dl twiic"h hiis hanir,
"Iie.tke-s the rotti as I took ito sRn;
Really, the youngrter is beating ine"
"wVhewl got a tumb!e? You'ri' rather sinall
To hnl>nce yotts, ? or Iler t': too tali?
Which is it, sotnniy'?' lie rti his hend*
Grass isn't dititents soft ts iti Ie i;
"'posel . w as cr i;ig? Now, Jerry Lane,
\Vnit till you lear i a fellow complain
1 was thinking-well, thoug hts get jumbled
If I had a cotch and ihorsop, you know,
Always harnessed to take a ride,
1 wouldn't tmind sitting sinet iues inside I''
-('ia: ot1t( M-len i>nekard.
UNJ)ER I)IFFICUL'TJ IES.
''l)o yo'.t really mean it, dntlinn?'
"Of course I do, Frank. )o you
think I would joke about such a silb
ject?" replied pretty Grace Ramsey to
her aflianeed husband, as she n'stled
her sunny little head on his broad
shoulders one bright March evening,as
the dying sun glinted through the cosv
irawing-roomt, castinfg a golden g'ory
Upon the pictures, carpet, and crimlsoi
curtains, as if trying to outvio the
cheerful fire that blazed in the highly
"I could not refuse you anything,my.
sweet, Grace," he said tenderly, as lie
pressed her dewy lips; "but I would
much rather you had asked m any
thing in the world than this."
"Why, Frank ?" site returned, look
ir,g up i > his handsome face with (ne
of her b vitching smile;- that, always
finished any argument in her favor.
"Vell, you see, to.spend one's hron
oynoon im a new house, and at this
,tyoacherous time of year, might not be
so comfortable, my pet, as a well-ap
pointed hotel in the South of France or
Italy," ho urged deprecatingly, feeling
the ground slipping fast away from
imu with her bright eyes looking shyly
into his, her sweet face in close prox
imity to his moustache.
"But it is my great wish; and I will
obey you in everything after we are
mlarried, you know, like a dutiful little
wife,'' she said playfully.
"What, put this notion in your littlo
"Gri'aindm:mmut1a; and you must agree
that she is4liver. Now vol sit down
here, and I w'il tiake my 'old place ot
this stool," as she enseoned herself at
his feet coaxing-ly.
"So grandna has put this totion in
to your muind?"
"Yes; she said that when she was
married grandpa took her straight
from the church to their new hole,and
they were as happy as birds.
'Bitt what tinu of year nioAht that
happy event, have taken place?" lie
",July, I ib:lieve,''" 'ace saidu dec
miuretly. "WVhiat matter's the time?
Surely) it cotthli mtakt:e no dife rnce."
"Tit at is jushtY lhat dotes. \l ar(ch anrd
Jurly, little sweethearti', arce 'rv ditifer
en1t iln0h our angeall climai :te;~b)esid es,
I fancy a lit tie birdt whtispeored to mue
that their homne was a fine old mnisioni
thait htad .,uAcomUed severai'l b)rides,
wvhereas our is a nrewly-built, mU(oern
villa, that sh%,uld( be well1-aired before
we Lake po)sse~sson."
''So it is,'" site ptersisted. " 'Jane atnd
grandima wveie threro all mast week, anrd
the fires ai'e blazingo beautIifurlly from
morning till ight. Comne, say 'yes';''
arid hier soft whltito arms were irountd his
neck, antd a panir of temupting lips placedI
dlang.eirsly near to htis; andri Gra ce,as
usual, gain ed her poinit, r>ut shre had to
pay her lover thte penialty of a score of
'"T'his is delighrtfuli, d arliing huisbatid,"'
wvhiisp)ered Grace, as thley throve to) thteir'
new home at Cliaphami, 'tafieri tire wed
dingi-breoakfatst. "'I shalhl beu such a
hrappy little wiey-couinencing~ life ini
our1 own deair htomie; it, mu tst be be:tter -
thiani these btig, (cold-looking hteld s,
with starinig we itns atnd p)ort chambter
* "So long as mty swveet wvifo is happy,
I am contenti," lie said tnderly; ''but
there is a nasty east windl to-da'y;'' thris
ats iro folded heri P fry riounld liert withr .
lover's alnxious~ catre. " i hiope UV very-.
tine is ready for its.'
" ,you need not, be unteasv I feel
sure Jane ill at,tentd to everyritting; sheo
Is a p)erfoot pafr'azon."
"'liert we are ait la1st! W\oleomre. dart
linig wvifo, to your home!"t h' le said as het
led hter up the ihlight of .steps where'( ob1l
Jauno stood wvith two nitrad-servanits to
receive theIr young m13istress.
"'I ivondor why Janoi looks so aliX
hous, ''though t Gra'ce; "'I hropo evt:rv
thmng is all right. Oh deair! whart shiotuld
I do if there wvas anlyt.hing gone wvrongP
Fr'ank wvould never c0aso terni e
whiispetredh, w'ien they were in thbe dlraw..
illg-I(roo., "I thotughit ever'ythng was
''So it was, hut the dratted cistern
too)k to leak ig thIis mornlinIg, and be..
in g Easter-thnre no mialt caii be got for
01'o moneliy. I never saw such a
g;igerbread hrouse as tis ill tall my
borni (lays!" she sarid gloomrily.
"Cain't youi tmaniage to pult them
down, so thrat Fratnk wonr't notice it,P"'
the poor little bride faltered.
"Pt themu down to be spoilt! Why,
they aird alreatdy wet, thrrouigh in somei
plaos; but hero conmes the mai:ster,'' as
sire btnstledl out of the r'ootm.
"'This cort.ninly looks conv and Iromi-.
like.'' saitd Frank Whiarton~:s hre clasp..
ed his bidte ini a loving embrace, anld
seatetd her in an easy-chair by time lire;
"'but whiarts the matter with that, wall?
Why, I' he on we' anm tir --..e Is
perfectly wot and pooling off. I mus
set the fellow who papered it; such
room cannot be lit for my little wifoy.
"Oh, that is nothing, Frank, it is of
ten like that in now houses, I believo,
she said timidly.
"1I must insist that you don't sta
another moment,'' ringing the be
sharply for Jane. "Why did you per
wit your mistress to com in this dam
vault?" ho said testily; "it's enough t
kill a dog."
"I am sure, sir, it was no fault <
mine,'' said poor Jane; "they say tha
the paper im new houses often sweats
at least, that's what the man style
"Is there no other room fit to receiv
us?" lie asked; "surely the dining-roon
would be better?"'
W''Weil, you see, sir, the stove is wh
they c:ll slow cobustion."
"Slow wlat?" lie said, laughing i
spite of hinself.
"I dlon't know exactly how to pro
nouclie the nlamne, but, it's a sorry thin
at the best, and won't act nohow, try a
"It's a beautiful grate, Frank," it
terlosed( Grace; "its one of the mod
ern onle1, and is called slow coml1bus
"It's dratted slow!" grumbled Jant
"I've splent three-quarters of an hou
o\ver it and can't get a lire to burn, s
it's slow enough in -ll conscience."
"Never lii, Jane; 1'm beautifull
waru :anl icomlfortable-inldeed I an
"'ell, I suppose We mllst make th
best of it now," he said, trying to ap
'"I inow what I'll (o,' mlurmutrc
Grace; "musii. e ahvays suits Frank; 1'
piny and sing some of his favorites.''
in a few minutes the little cloud wa
blown over, and the pair were happy
as turtle-doves, as Grace sang song af
ter S(i1 to Frank's intenso delight.
"WVhait on earth are they doing in th
kitchen?" she thought; ''I must g(
at see. I feel sure they will brea
the grate to pieees in a minute. 0
doar, ol dear! I wish J..had taken den
1ranl's advice. What are you all d<
ing, andl where is the diiner?" sai
Grac. "It is nearing the time."
'1inner, indeed! If yolu g,et suppe
it will he a wonder to mue," g:spe
Jane, as, arnedl witI an inlnenlso 1le
l:rush, she and her asasistnuts wer
nakinig fralntic raids upon the khitcher
or, while the smoke poured out in vo
um110s, nearly chlokin22 poor GL"'ce, whl
stood the im11age ot despair, gazing r
the fowls, fish, and joints, that la
strewn about, getting peppered wit
"What's to be done, Jane?" sh
stamnmered, as she covered her golde
head to evade the shower of soot, at
caught up her satin robes nervously
"it is past six o'clock, and Fraik wa
just saying he felt rather hungry. Ca
nothIini be done? Couittn't yoi ge
SORte hotel to send in a dinner?"
"\Where's the hotel in this outland
ish hole?" snorted Jane, as she thru
the broom savarcly up into the ofl'ent
ing draughts; "I can only assure yo
that no dinner ean be cooked to-day i
this gingerbread allair."
Seeing no hope from the faces of an
of the seared servants,. Grace returnec
to her husbandl, and in her pretty coax
Ing manner, broke the unhappy tiding
to hiu, and in less than ten initiutes
telegranl was dispatched to the Gros
velor Hotel, and a rcchcrchc little din
"So that little difliculty is over, mn
darling,'' he said, as they drove t
Piimlico; "but don't you think it nigh
have been better if you had listened t
miy advice and spent our honeymor
at. 0e0 of those big cold hotels?" thi:
wi th a miischiievous twvinkle in his eves
"'As you are mighty, be mercifil,'
she said, laughIing merrily. "'I hadl n1
idea that the stove wvouldn' t cook, o
"'That the drawing-room afas (lainp,
he ad ded ; "or----''
"'Fie! is that being mlerciftil, sir,'' sh
lint further dlomestic argument wa
brokent by a waiter openling the broug
ham-door, and Frank assisting her ott
mtto the (com0fotrtable hotel.
'"Tank Ileavent we are ini a civiliv.ei
p)lace ait last!'' murmured the newv Beln
edict fervently, as they seated thenm
selves at ani ole'maitly arrangedt dinRner
table, laden with Ilowers, bright silver
aRid spar'kling glass; "'this is comfort
at any rate.'"
'Thley hothI enjoyed their dinner an<t
pled(ged each other' iln rare wine, an11
said aRnd (tidl aiiy amount, of sill,
things, (tollbtless as thtousands a
brides aRnd bridegrooms have done be
lote ; and, if trutth uiust be confessed
Grnee was sadly lotht to r'eturni to lie
villat at Claphiami; but she wa.s a trti
daugi'hter of Eve, andl determninedt ti
kee p ht(er(W i(21 owncousel fror. hier lor<
"'1Ilre's a p.retty go, Mdiss Grace
beg yu r paritdonl, I Rme an Mirs. WVhat
ton,' sailtiI.tane as5 the prtet.ty bride en
tOlred thle b reakfas25t-roomit m iiornini
lookini:,; as fresh and1( sweet, ats a blusih
low ini her azar:ie-bluii Rmorining-robe
wvitht its clot (da of lae arounid her fai
nec1k anid armsi.
"Why ,in(, what is tho matte:
no0w?" she2 .aid1 anlxiouisly; "'surely yor
enn manaLI:1e to get, us some0 br'eakfat, o
"That2 's righ t eno1)ugh so far1,"' gr'oan
(2d ,l 1ne; "bult theore's no0 waitr for th<
1in:n 's bath, it' i leaked out somiehov
thr I :b some dr 'ttted pipe and soakeot
yo'.Ihin-dIre <s, aiid the( enake thia'
yearIi poor dlear 1" nidiii sent 1home1 las
:ellht while ot were1 iout at12, d inr.ki
the dress5 wob be11 0 better latid 1loos1l
lIke thanti erumii:d up1, land ther's ti
SplenIdIh (enke :uni satin dress5 1all of
PulIP; thte Ilowers, too, all sopply ami
This was 11he i)rovrial laist straw,
Emd proved too n IuchI for poor1 ( race,
who throew herself on thio couchi, andl
afWering her' sweet face, burtst into a~ fit
>f tear ls, exel aiin ig:
"'eioer will I ttry to get my own way
'gam! What will dlear Frank sav? Oh,
'dh! lie ,will novor' forgivo inc--I~ know,
li aniotler illmnt',tta tl'
pa1it' of arms lift, her. ftrom thi. coue(li
"'You are right, my darlinIg wifey';]
will not forgive yoni uinles -drI I '
those eyes and hiavo ,youtr breakhfats,
u11d theit ohey ot lor,an .. ore
t your things to be packed up immedi
a atoly for the Continent, whither I moan
to take you."
- "But what is to be done, Frank, about
the eake? And oh, my protty dress is
spoilt, that I was to have worn at Lady
y Steedmnuan's reception!"
" "Another eako can bo ordered; also
a dress, quito as pretty as your wed
p ding one; but a smiling happy wife is
o not to be pturchased," ho reolied, kiss
ing away the yearly but penitent tears.
f ''Arc you happy, darling?" her hus
t band whispered, as the train neared
' "Yes, Frank," she replied oarnestly,
truliy ai peacefull y so, becauso I
e have learnt a l's on--to listen and re
spect my hru;band':; wishes."
"And I am the Ii:M 1 ie 11t man in the
t universo for havin ri commenced our
honeymoon under ill iul ties, and havo
won the sweetest of wives.''
'Is she lemdi . '
I should grin e o h ir i1t she was.
I ant referrin' t :;it . I-natured,
ever-ready, old- sh I ion: .:nnimother
of days grone by. '.e wr ,, m 1rand
miother and yoirs, , : - very
body else's, when on' w uI-.led. I
I remember her as .r:r:v- .:.re, wrinkle
r faeei and hand1 cii " I %,I the
hard work of plion:-er ' . I remem
ber her sy' thl:ltiR tic \'.-e and'n soft
Y touch-her swel-b)%we.I ," p e :es--her
quaint old snu1111-box--lir butiiig look
and anxious tones as she Came in the
e back way and calle'l ou::
"And so that bov's had to give up
and go to bed, eh? le::r mle! but it's
too bad, thougrh I gue-s it's nothing
serious, and I hope von won't worry.
Let's see him. Ah-um! Stomach out
3 of order and he's got sonic fever. HIad
my children taken this way dozens of
times and in two days they were out
It was worth a month's sickness to
see her bustle around after horso
radish leavev to make drafts for the
feet; cloths to wet in cold water for the
r head-mustard for tho back of the
neck-a bit of rhubarb to sweetc the
I tonmch, and to hear her say:
"Well, now, who'd thought it; but
r don't worry! Mercy on me! butt my
Dan'1 has been sicker'n that fifty differ
-ent ties and isn't dead yet. Just
e you go right down and finish your
- baking and leave me to take care of
- him. I just dote on sick folks!'
: And didn't things turn out just as
t she predicted? And three days after
V didn't she come down into th back lot
where I was eating sour crab-apples
and fling up her hands and exclaim:
B "For the land's sake! but does this
I boy mean to kill himself afore the
I summer is out!"
If mother had a pain in her side she
ran over to see grandma. If father
1 wvent lame it was grandmother who
t nad a remedy. Not in our family
alone, but in a dozen. Not in one
- case, but in a hundred.
t Who had catnip and smart-weed
- and may-weed and oak bark and spico
I bush and mustard? Grandmother, of
I course. Who knew what was good for
earache, toothache, jaundice, langruor,
loss of appetite, rheunmatism, bilious
1 ness and a hundred other ills? Grand
- mother. .
s And if her remedies failed to arrest
2 disease and the doctor was sent for
- how kindly courteous he was! Every
- thing she had done was professionally
justified, and he seemed almost sorry
that she hadn't worked a euro and do
prived hinm of his fee. Hle would take
t the case and warrant a cure, but, of
I course, must depend upon her to a
t great extent. Such a compliment was
f worth more han a new home to her,
And if dheath camio granidmothier 'vas
there to weep with the family and to
3I conisole all others. It, was her poor
r' old hing~ers which closed. the eyes
which hellped to ma:ke the shroud
'which arranged the lifeless hands. It
wIas her' voice whiiich kept,ii wisp)ering':
3 "TIhere! there! poor thiing-dlon' t take
it so mtuch to heart! lIe is far better
s off than we are, and yotu must live on
- for those left behind.'' She was wvit,h
the mournercts-at tile gr'ave--back to
the hotuse to cheer the heart-broken
i and leaLve them at, night withi a feeling
that it was for the best.
Anid it wvas a holiday wh'len grand
mother caime over with her knittino or
sewinig for an afternoon visit. She'lad
the rocking-chair and1 the cosiest, cor
nier, and no queen was more respected.
Sheo r'eember'ed the wvar' with Mexico,
I andl the fall of stars, andl two) or threco
rear-thl(uaikes. She r'ecolected what
f ovt rybody hiad dreamed, and how it
camea out, and( who married who and1(
how they prospecred. She had( seen1
two or three Presidents; been to New
Yor'k ind Niagara Falis. She was a
> miedlical college, an enceyclopedia and a
I book of adventures combined, and( 1hcr
goimg away at nlight left a vacancy
I that she alone could( fil.
-Is she still Ilivinig? If so, may the
worl reverence her1. Is 1ho (lead? If
, o, nuiry thie sunishine of lieaven have
-iiiade her' the hiappliest, angel of them
I)elig.i i-i of ( Iorunry Life.
'NowV, then, farmer,'' said the deni..
zen of the~ city, aIfter. he hiad mi.ado ar
raingenments for the board of hiimself
-andW fam iil y for a fortnihit, and p)aidl
the b)ill ill advance, ''F suipposo we'll
ofi gover while we are here--plen
ty ogodcountry butter, and all thiat
'No d anlger oif starving, ch?'"
"Oh)., no;, sirt; thle pctbilhers from thli
city vcomet thiis way twvice a week wi th
veg(etalhes, fruits, and suchl; the mii'!r
traini slops anid leaves a1 cani every dIay,
andt the buitter', ceese, anid eggs~ mian
comei is round11( eviery SaturdIay' as regu..
Ia as U cItc w ork. You nieedn ' t have
far b-Ut youi'll barVe plenity to "at.''
''iiow's da t ar boy ob miiinocmn
on in de Su nlay-school?'" askedi Sam
,Joihnsig of Lev. Aiminidab luditsoe, of
thle Blu c1 liht C oloredl Tabhern acle
"'Ib-t comeit up~ ighity slowv with the
tcoh-I:' -"FIa Gjod, I'll tan his
Sundta:y to put in de pilate."' 'arson
l t.o exphiine th le diIfer-ence bii
tween-i at coiet arid a Iollectioni, whlere
uptot S:t ii: "Dii Jar's n10 uIso crowd
ini' lhe i. ty, I no-bber had& ino talent for
'li'rion u h:e n 1 n~ as u boy.-- T1cz(as
Other Worlds TAan Ours.
Tho world of human affairs is in the It K
mind. A man visits the park to-day.
His soul is ill, and the grassy expanse, ,.,
the tree-Rlligeo, and the colors and Stor
smell of the flowers come to him and side
cure him. Ie remembers the park .5
fondly, and is impelled afterwards to ..
return to it. Now his mind is well, Boli
his spirit is proud. The same park is ,,
there, but the visitor has no power to but
seo it. He may begrudge the time are
taken in the trip. hear
A farmer goes across a fine field. He ,,
discovers a Canada thistle, and a panic yel
takes hold of him. lie goes home and i
endeavors to affect the minds of his
sons with the same alarm. The must ati
all get their boos and search for adlt
thistles, or the farm will be overrun bold
and they will all be ruined. A lady, J
visiting this farm, goes acrgss the in(i
same field. . She discovers a long- 5o)(
looked for plant. 11er heart is all
aglow, and she takes such a view of bell
the surroundings that she afterwards retr
sits down and writes to a friend that, rv
she will over regret this friend might ser
not have been thero just then to share fron
the scene. She would even have te
guessed that her host, the farmer now the
panic-stricken over the thistle, would m
only have to go to that same spot to reas
xet the emotions which she enjoyed. r.6
Now let us imagine that her friend, to -
whom she writes, by sonic chance were be i
traversing that field and there heard of
the (leatil of husband or dlhild. All the not
beauties of the scene would still be won
there, but the satt effoet which they had dih
on the farmer would be intensilied ten '
thousand times in the mind of the re- ani
ci'picnt of such news. How truly and
Northumberland speaks in the second ther
pat, of King Henry Fourth: tI
"Yet the first bringor of unitclcomec news toba
Hath but i losing cfilce, and his tongue
Sounds ever afI .t as a sulon ell, Coil
Itemembrc,ed kuolling a ucIarted friend." CoCII
Each man upon this earth lives in thin]
his own world, a cocoon, a chrysalis, we p
which has grown less permeable each 'K
year. It is idle for us to present our deje
world to him-when he is not in the has
mood to leave his invisible shell. Thus ed t
the author, the painter, the statesman sons
-all who depend for their success on ']
reaching the inner and finer attributes girl,
of their associates-must abide a patient go 1
time. What elicited antipathy yester- casc
day may pass with apathy to-day; may pi)c
meet with sympathy to-morrow. cou
The czar of Rusiia reigns an absolute out
monarch because his nations are as.
pleased that he should. ' When he
passes by, the peasant feels an exalta- age
tion of spirit, and believes that he is ii rets
the presence of something holy. Let
us suppose some angel visited every Soi
home in all the Russias and spoke to won
boyard and peasant with the power of seer
truth. The ten diadens at Moseow trad
would count for no more than the samo peit
number of crowns in the property- cag<
room of a theater. No assassin would thes
need to mole his way und r the palace sale
at St. Petersburg. The czar would be sale
an impossible personage. leas
Louis the Sixteenth of Franco was the
yesterday a saint and a king. His ends
associates were counts andi dukes and dud<
marquises. .To-day his people are who
changing their minds. To-morrow the first
kig will be acondemned and executed abet
felon. His associates will be wander- the t
ers on the face of the earth. Even the werc
church, the very basis of French so- thos<
ciety, will be torn out of the hearts of for t
the people. and God and government has I
botl be defied and set at naught. The be n:
rest of the world, unable to see the good
light let in by the French revolution, pack
will look on in dismay and believe the pear
people of a whole nation have gone. to di
ilad at one and the same time. ers
Some years ago a German paper- mad
sarrier on WVest Madison street inl Chii- of thI
:ago arose at 4 o'clock a. mn., washed, pape
iressed, took a street-car, visited the maki
marious newsp)aper oflices, .got his lung
>apers, returned to his hlouse, laid his couc
nl of papers on a counter-tile p)laee
vas a liaundry-wvent to the bed wheroe
us wife was still slteping, shot her
ieadh, and then lay diown beside her A
mdit took his owvn life in tile Samie way. r.eel
sowv whiat a gulf thlere was between wvas
lIe goings anud comings of this man: poor
mud the life within him. Truly, the her
master was away. Hadl you met tile $5
body of tis man on the street you tendt
would simply have been speaking to dliedi
the overydiay attributes to whlom lie loss,
hlad left the charge of his being.' 're
To-day a shoemaker opens1. shop at a still
new stand. A caller asks for Thomp.. pale
son, the former tenant. T1he inquirer that
is informed very p)olitely that Thiomp drelts
son has moved to Dakota. Thei inexitiqual
caller is told less politely. Thel next Sii
caller is spiokeni to formally; the next aft'
curtly; tile next half angrily. Now wo
you yourself drop in to see Thomplson. atre<~
You leave that shop1 withl the im pres..an
sionl that you muet tho "'chamioniti mean wh le
mian."' You have seen him! There lie ifet
is-keeping shop1 ini Thlom pson's old she
pilace. But you have not. It (hid not and1(
r-aini as hard as you suipposedI. You agai
stoodi under the eaves of a large roof iniad
andI got all thio water. That other man 1, bi
dioes' not move along in the street-car. A in
lie is not a brute necessarily. Ilis lit.. dires
the worldi may bto In titter dlarknetss coUg
Ilis wvifo iiay hlav(l died yesterdiay. ceif
Sio niay even be wvorse thati dlead to fice
him. Last week he would have gone base
Lith whole length of the car to obligo setn
you. You ask the name of the street Poss~
from a chianeo p)asser. Think of it!i"'os
lie may have been neglecting his most hurt1
impiortant interests for two days. lie
linay nout even have been ab)le to receivo
motley from diebtors1 on account of the
fi res of grief, passion. d isapploinltmetnt Ri
wvhich suirge wvithin im-ii is it not a of th
wvoniderful ih ing if hie shall give you e,00,
ieenit anuswer?I tild
"'We ar;e such tiling as dreams are pl aci
mad on(1 i''-never were truer wor'ds .1)1ac,
tipoken! Let las go out among our fel- lng
lowvs with exceeding charity. if we tiroi
)ould ii 5o( in to their trule existence, our aild.
,aaths wvouldl be much easier to fol low. coith
ret, wvith the knowledhre tha't each tearth
nani hmves a different lifS and SeeLs a fecth
laiceront world, we mayv comoe to a bet- founl
,or untderstanding with our friends aund the e
Smore enduring truco with our oe- poiro
1lios---John~Al McGover, in thec Current. ed in
A noegro fellI fronra four-story buui. svt
ng in Charl restonl oin th1 p)iazza shled
)lowV, .and(, lolling oifi, fell on thletcic
~rouind in tile yard. 1I10 was Iisensi- er
il for- a siiort time, but qulickly recov- tca .9
red, andi, on b)eing as5kett if 110 was j 5i1
eriously hurt, hIe aniswered: "'Oh, no. wl
1(1 hIad fallen on his headt, and( no bones theg
vero broken. 1
1lls, but "There's Millions In It."
lave you any cigarets, Mr. Dru
o1 Man?" a dude asked a North
mny kind you wish."
11 take a package of Mignonet
Vell, we haven't any by that namo,
hero is the next thing to It. These
allod '1'11 never forgot my sweet
'11 try those," said the thin-logged
ig man, and as he balanced a shin
pair of glasses upon a long and
nent nose ho gavo several puff3
to samplo of the nw brand, glanced
irimgly at the pale face reflected
nd the cloud of smoke in the look
-lass, and vent his way, gayly
itling the air to the latest love
to prescription clerk camo out from
ud his window and looked at the
.ating figure in contempt: "Ob
e," ho said, "how the youth ad
d himself as lie puffed away in
t of the glass. Well, I dare ty
tobacco sickened him, but ho
kes because it looks well. I pre
a he wears glasses for the samo
ou have no right to complain,"
the proprietor, "trade would not
ilf so good for us if the dudes did t
noke. You might as well tell the j
en to stop eating morphine and
Lnso with cosmetics. Suppose they 1
what would become of our occu
)ns? We might have to turn in
(1o what, those muel are doing out f
-scrape the streets. It's all for t
>cst. The (hide smnokes cigarets, t
while he does ie patronizes the c
-co case. After awhile lie gets a ,
It and goes to the doctor, and I
~S to us5 with a prescr'iption. i lo
i cs lie has a fatal disorder, and so
et the best of him a<ain."
hat may be so," sald the clerk,
stedly, "but in the meantime ho
married a rich girl and is prepar
lead a life of ease while niore <
iblo men are rollingr ills.'
f you want to catch onto a rich
" said the proprietor, "you oughter
nd hire out as a coachman. In that
you'd have to get, Used to a cob
a la Carlisle, that is until you
d stand in with the family and iind
where the oid man kept his llavan
(ou don't mean to infer that dudes
the only people who smoke ciga
do you?" a reporter asked.
\o; they are the largest customers.
e are consumed by young boys and
en. The dude and the cigaret
i made for on another, and the
e in them-I nean cigarets-de
I upon the crop of dudes. In Chi
o there must ie large numbers of
o silly young men, for the annual
of cigarets is immense. A whole
dealer told me recently that at
100,000,000 of them were sold by
irms he could name on his fingers'
It is a question whether the
was called out by the cigarot or
her he originated the cigaret. 'T'he
cigarets were made for the trade
t ten yeurs ago, up to which timo
obacco andi papers of which they
made were sold separately, and
> who smoked them made them
temselves. Since then machinery
)een invented by which they can t
ado mil large quantities. Since the
s began to be sold in ready-made
ages the trade has shifted, it ap- t
t, from the confirmed smokers over
des and beginners, tho old smok
referring cigars, because they are
3 of better tobacco and have none
e poison contained in 111( ciraret
r. T1his enters into the Clood,
~s the fance hale, settles upon01 the
4, anid gives birth to a hacking
It ewitched WVe(l(ling D)ress-.
very singular case has come out I
illy in regard to a young girl wvho
2lngaged to be0 married. Sho was
anid her intended hiusbaund bought I
'vwedding dIross at an expense of
Blefore the wedding day the in
01 br'idegroomi was taken sick andi
Thie bride-elect mourned his
and14 finally imlaginied that he wans
lt about her, and that shte wvould.
be married to him. She told her
[ats howv she felt, and they told her
sihe muist get rid of the wveddinig
3. She sold it fort $10 to an ac
ntanice and sooni recoveredl her'
ts. 'I'he girl who bought the dlress
she got, it inmagined~ thiat she
id lead a badi life, and shIi was so
1041 thait she was out of her head,
her parenti s Mu nt the dr ess back,
4 she recovere 1. No. 1 wvas soon
ted as befoir', anid s(o iiuchl so that
senft, the diress hack toi No. 2 atrain,
lien she recovered. No. 2~ was
n affected. an 144 aI tttem pt wvas
e to r<81r4 the dress againz to No.
it he1 ianmily declined to reCeUivo it.
lico olicer was sent to take the
a back, after (oins ult at iozf wit h
iacl, buit, niither pairty would4 ire.
bit, and4 now the friends oIf the of-I
are looking to see himii go off his
on4 accoun lt (of thii dress5. It woul d
4 as though tic 4)h4 Sailemr witchies
ssed1( thle dress, and4( it is barelyc
ible thiat thle g:irmenit miight ho
A~ Geent Ielnl.t.
clbartl A. I roittor satys thait the age
(1 earth is phired4( by some i at 500I,- k~
I00 y,ears, and44 still others -(of 1:ater '
amionig liem the' 1)iil2 of Ar'ryll, c
wihiat procene' have been gone
igh. Th le :art h miio st hanvi become b
I give noi rea:L.ol for it, that thiet
Swouild ati onie tim be44 comoi per- n
I dIry. Sinace then'i it has been
I that. Newo c orlu v:~ 'rect. As fr
ar11h kep cool(1(11ineg it wi'ill become a
4s, anud great cavilties will be form-- k
the inlterior4 whih w vill take in thre
.It is e'. liatedl thait this lpre
s iiow ini pro<ress. so far that the e
dlimlilih '4- I the rate of the b
niess oIf a she oc1 f wi i rig paper a ,
At this~ rate ini 9,000,000) years y
'at4e1 wvill havie s;iunk a1 mile, andi in r
3,Uf00 yea4rs every trace of water y.
ave d isappeared from t,be face of a
Many of you know about optical il
usions, and the curious mistakes which
ho oyo sometimes makes concerning
nu object at which it is looking; but
ow of us know how frequently we our
elves aro the victims of uptical il
usions of one sort or another. The
act is, we see nearly as much with our
hxperienco as we see with our eyes.
Ye know an object to be of a certain
orni in one position, and of a certain
olor in one light; and we are too apt
o fancy that we seo it of that form
and color in all positions and lights,
regardless of the fact that, seen from
snotier stand-point, the contour of it
ma:y appear entirely differont, and that
a diflurent light may totally chan o
the color of it. We all know that the
actual color of clean boots is black,
and a beginner in painting almost al
ways paints them perfectly black,
whereas the direct rays of the sun or of
an artificial light may make them ap
pear nearly white in parts; while if
thcy be placed near some bright sub
htance, such as a pieco of orange-peel,
r a crimson scarf, they will reflect the
solor of that 'object, and so become
)range or red in parta, and an expert
minter would so represent them. We
lear people speak of "the white of the
hyc," and beginners with the brush
)ften give a very ghastly expression to
heir attempts at portraiture by paint
ng the white of the eye pure white;
vhereas, owine to the projection of
he brows, the lids, and the lashes, it
s often thrown into deep shade, and
nay be even darker than some of the
lesh tints. Now, if their eyes were
rained liko those of a skilled artist,
hey would know the true color of all
>bjeets they beheld. But this is tihe
rery hardest, thing an artist has to
earn, namely, to know really what he
In coloring, almost everything de
>ends upon the nature of the light. A
vhito handkerchief is black in a dark
An exceilent aid to the study of col
or is to take a white card, and with
.our paints try to match on it some
int in any oil-painting, chromo, or
.ven colored fabric which you may
ave. Then cut a small hole in the
-ard adjoining your tint, and place the
,ard over the tint you have copied, so
that you can seu it through the hole,
hio by side with your own attempt.
1'hen you will see at once how nearly
ro': have matched the tint.-Frank
dellcwu, in St. Nicholas for October.
Tile Velocity of the Moon.
From the article on "The Surround
ings of the Sun," by Professor Lang
ley, in the October Century, we quot
the following: ''We can faintly picture,
perhaps, how it would seem, from a
ttation near the lunar orbit, to see the
noon-a moving world-rush by with
i velocity greater than that of the can
ion-ball in its swiftest flight; but with
,qual speed its shadow actually travels
!long the earth; and now, if we re
.urn from our imaginary station to a
eal one hero below, we are botter pro
)ared to see why this flying shadow is
uch a unique spectacle; for, small as
t may bo when seen in relation to the
vhole globe, it is immense to the ob
erver, whoso entire horizon is tilled
vith it, and who sees the actual veloci
y of one o; the heavenly bodies, as it
vere, brought down to him.
"The reader who has ever ascended
o the Superga, at Turin, will recall the
uagnificent, view, and be able to un
lerstand the good fortune of an observ
r (Forbes) who once had the op)por
unmty to witness thence this p)henomo
on, aiid under a neariy cloudless sky.
I perceived,' lie says, 'in the south.
vest a black shadow like that of a
torni about to break, which obscured
ho Alps. It was the huinar shadow
'ominig towvard us. ' And lho speaks of
110 'stup)efaction'-it Is his word
auisedl by thie speCctacle. 'l confess,'
.0 continuIes, 'it was the most terrify
rig sight I ever sawv. As always hap.
'ens in the cases of sudden, silent, un
xpeOcted moevemients, t,he spectator
onfoulnds real and relative motion.,
alt almost giddy for a moment, as
bougn the massive building under me
>owed on the sido of the coming
clipse.' Anlothler witness, who had
10c1n looking at some bright clouds just
efore, says: 'The bright, cloud I saw
listincetly piut out, like a candle. T1ho
al)ndity of tile shadowv, and the inten
uity, piroduced a feeling that something
nlateriail was sweeping ever the cartht
it a sp)eed peOrfectly frightful. [ invol
intarily listened for the rushing noise
>f a mighlty wvind.
A Lilti l Savage,
A bout thle time wheni baby begins to
>ult away mionikey mniiners, and to
tantd onl tVwo feet like a man11, ho .Jegins
.o show, m1 aL very marked (degree, tile
~haracterist,ics of savage tribes. For
wo or three years of this plart of life
lie best baby is a little savage. His
denis of p)rop)erty are intensely savage.
Jo maly be said to boe always more or
oss. "'on the grab"' (1 object to slang
.s muchl as any mani, but really there
11no other way of describing the teixt
ncies exlibited at this stage of bab hy's
areer.) If lie 11a1 small brothers or
isters (or both), lie is always mere or
iss at war with thi.ooneiglhboring say
ges. If lie is deprived of anything lie
as conmo to regardl as his p)ropecrty
<luito mistakenly, it may wecll bo.) or
lie sees in the hands of his small
insfolkc any goods or chauttols which
som pleasing in his eyes, he has but
no way of oxp)ressing his wishes;
sing his hiands as weapons If ho have
o others handy, but bringing down a
ick or brush or book (as the ease may
a) on thet' head of his enemy with all
10 zeal of a Fijian or a jllbboway on
10 waLr-pathu. Girl bab s are pretty
early as had as boy babies in those
atters, only the girl savage differs
om the boy savage much as savage
oman ditfers from savage man.-Bos
"Tot," said Blossom, "have you ever
eeni baptizedP" "Yeth, I i'avo been
Lptithed. 1 remember all about It."
l)0 youl?" said Blossom. "Did the
miister put,1 water en your head like he
ld on baby Johnnio's?" "No-o-o,"
dld Tiot; "the doctor lie juithit scratch
1 my arm and rubbed something on it,
i didn't hutrt a bit."-Bodton Globe.
WIT AND HUMOR.
"Why does a dog chase his tailt"
asks an i'le paragrapher. Beoauss it
fleas from him, of course.-Burlingkti
"So you think John is becoming a
great man in the city?" said a farmer,
speaking of his absent son to a com
panion of the youth. "Great man! I
should say so. Why, there ain't a bar
keeper In the city hardly that he don't
call by his first name."
When Mrs. Homespun read In the
paper that Slappandash had "failed for
200,000" she said he was a lucky fel
low. She thought-the innocent crea
ture-that he got that much money by
failing? What ridiculous ideas the
women do have about business!
When Mrs. Pinaphore read that
"Foo Chow had fallen," she said th a
this might be good news to those who
liked the stuff, but she wouldn't buy
the mixture if it were to fall to three
cents a quart. It is supposed the good
woman was thinking of chow chow.
Said Jones: "We're going to run
Blif kins for Judge this falL" Said
Smith: "Blifkins! What does be know
about law?" "Nothing at all. He
never saw a law book. That's the
reason we are going to run him. We
think that If he is ignorant of law we
may get a little justice."
Blunkin and his wife had been in
dulging in a family discordance and
finally Mrs. B. exclaimed: "Well, I've
got my opinion of any man that talks
as you do." "Oh, have you! Well,
you can keep it if you want to." "No,
I can't, either. It's so awfully bad al
ready that it won't keep."
"What," asks a very tender writer,
"what can take the place of babies?"
Sh! Bond your car a little closer and
we'll toll you. Other babies. You
didn't suppose this year's crop would
last forever, did you? Goodness, man,
it will be clear out of style in eighteen
months. -Brooklyn Eagle.
The neatest fraud in Saratoga is said
to be a girl who is apt at making such
very disingenious remarks as this:
"Deary me, Sophy, you have just the
same perfume in your scent bottle that
your brother Dolph puts on his mus
tache." And then she wonders wide
eyed what they are laughing at.
For bO, sake of truth men should be
more careful how they talk. It was
but yesterday that we heard a gentle
man say of a pretty girl who had just
passed: "She is a sweet girl," when
on investigation we found that he had
never even kissed her. Sueh talk is an
outrage on truth.-Kentucky State Jour.
A teacher asked a bright little girl
the other day what country was oppo
site to us on the globe. "1 don't know,
sir," was the reply. "Woll, now,"
pursued the teacher, "if I were to bore
a hole through the earth and you were
to go in at this and, whero would you
come out?" --Om of the hole, sir,"
said the pupil in triumph.-New York
"How wet the poor dear boy's hair
is," exclaimed the loving mother, as
she placed her hand tenderly upon her
child's head. "Playing out in the
hot sun makes the perspiration start
from every pore." And little William
Henry turned aside as he thought to
himself that he would go in swimming
again just as often as ho could while
the hot weather lasted.-howell Citi
Scone af the San Jose train: Gen
tleman in seat. Enter lady. Gentle
man rises, gives lisa seat to lady, leaves
his valise under the seat, goes into the
smoking car. Next station. Young
lady looking out at window. Man
ruishes along, looking for hi." valise.
Young lady hands it out. Next sta,
tion. Gentleman comes from smoking
car, bends down under seat, apologizes
to lady for troubling her to rise. Young
lady gets up. No valise. Tableau.
Ban Francisco Chronicle.
The tallest bird known to ethnolo
gists was found by Professor Herbert
in the lower eocene deposit. near
Paris, France. It was over twelve feet
in hiej&it and could have bitten a man's
head oil, as easily as a woodpecker can
mpij a cherry. WVe cannot be too thank
ful that this bird has gone out of fash
ion and existence. Ladies would have
wanted to wear it on their hate, and
meni who sat behind such bonnet orna
mnents in the theatres would be unable
to see whether a ballet or a prayer
meeting was in progross on the stage.
One of our English cousins was re
cently placed at dinner by the side of
a charming woman who had been re
questod by the hostess to amuse the
stranger. They were getting on very
wvell, wheni lhe dIrew attention to a guest
opposite by say ingt I say, do lol
at that spotted ma dyou ever see
such an objectP" the ladiy said
with much dignity, to stop his prattle
If p)ossible: "Yes; that is my hus
band." And the wretch said: "Oh,
how jolly, you know, because you can'
toll me-is he really spotted all over?"
Trho happy lot of the street-.car driver
Is thusi dlescribed by an ironical driver
in New York: The horses have to walk,
you know, but the driver just leans up
against the dashboard and rides. 1f
vou're fond of ridin' it's a soft job.
Fourteen shillin' a day is a big aumn of
money to pay out for seventeen hours'
work, but the oompany is rich and can
stand it. It costs a driver very littlo
to live, because he dloesn't have time to
cat anything. I used to keep naost of
my money in the bank, but so many
of 'enm are bustin' up that I dr&wed it
all out, and new I've got it up to the
house p)ackedi away in b/arrels.
She was a remarkably sensible'yoong
lady who made the request ofs her
friends that after her decease she.
should not be burled by the side o ' a
brook where babbling lovers we 14d
wake lier from her dreams; nor in any
grand cemetery, where uight-sees
-:onning over epitaphs, mIght distract
her, but be laid away to take her last
iloop under the counter of some mer
ihant who did not advertise. in -the
newspapers. 'There, she saJnt, was to
be found peace surpassing all under
standing-a depth of quiet slumber, on
which neither the sound of the buoyant
foot of youth nor the weary shuffle og
old age would ever intrude.-4abany
( Ga. ) News.