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Volume t Saturday moaning, july 6,1867. number 20
IM? OJlANGrEBU?Gr NEWS.
PUBLTSIIED AT OK AN GEBURG, C. S
Every Saturday Morning.
?:o:?
SAMUEL DIBBLE, Editor.
(WARLES JL HALL, Publisher.
,i? ?:o:?
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FREE OF CHARGE.
RATES OF ADVERTISING.
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A Square consists of 10 lines Brevier or one inch
of Advertising space.
Contract Advertisements inserted upon Ilie most
liberal terms.
MARRIAGE and FUNERAL NOTICES, not ex
ceeding one Square, inserted without charge.
., usr: Terms Cash in Advance, ."?a
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For further particulars, apply to Mu.Ciiaui.ks \'.
.Ham., or address
SAMUEL DIBBLE.
EniToii OiiAxuKiuritn Nnws.
Ornngidiurg, S. ('.
feb 23 o 1 v
PUBLIC OFFICERS.
OHA^GERFHG I) [STRICT.
Oi:inx.\u v?]\ A?.MeMiehael.
<'uim:i>-loMii^iN K.jri-.v?V. :). V. Jamison.
Ci.i:i:k (if Corr.V?.?? ph.F. Robini-oii.
Snr.r.irr? J. \V. II.
Co no x Kit?C. B. Glover.
Tax Cdi.i.v.ctiiii.s.?p.rniigo Parish.?P. Vi. Fairy.
St. Matthew? Parish ? W. ||. Dan'/.hr.
Asst. AssKsiou U. S. lii:vi:.\i v..?Gc?rgo W.
Sturgeon.
Aukxt run Stamps, Sir:?P. V. Dibble.
MariIsTltatks?Thomas i'. Stokes. W. I!. Trend
well, A. .). Gnskiu.?, F. W. Fairy, David L. Cunnor,
.7. H. Felder, Levin Argue, IL V. Dannelly, E. A.
Price, \\. L. Ehney, ,L I). Pricket, Samuel E. Moor
er, C. B. Glover. E. C. Hotmail. P. <\ Rnyekj F. M.
? Wannaniaker, D. 0. Tindall.
CoMMIHSIONKUfl TO AlU'rovk Sr.lTIUTI i'.s?j. G.
Wannaniaker, James Stokes, D. R. Barton, Adam
.^moke, A. D. Frederick.
Co.MJiiiasiONKns ok Puni.ic Rtit.nixcs?Win. M,
Hudson, Harpin Biggs, E. E/ckiel, Joseph I'. Hai>
loy, I'-. u- Briggmnnn.
^OMJll},s/oxr.r..s or Roads?Ornngc Parish?Wes
ley Houscr, F. Fairy, Samuel M. Fairy, Samuel
G. Fair, F. Living. s> ^,c)*> West ley Culler.
IL C. Wannamakcr, j.v- y- u - Sistrunk, 1!. Living
ston) James Stokes, J. O. Knotts, R. P. Antlcy, .lohn
S. Bowman, J. L. Moorer, >*."? <'? Mou>"- f'CwJa Oa
rick, B. A. Yon, J. II. O'Cain, L.^'son Connor, John
Brodic, J. G. Cuignard, .Jacob t>onci', George
Byrd, J. T. Jennings, David Dannelly.
CoMMissioxi:us or Roads?St. .Matthews Parish?
C S. -Darby, W. 0. Hane, M. K. Holman, Andrew
Housor, J. A. Parlour, E. T. Shulnr, .1. L. Parlour.
Owen Shulnr, T. G. Shulnr, W. L. Pou, J. W. Sel
lers, R. W. Bates, .1. W. Barbour, Augustus Avin
:gcr, P. W. Avingor, J. D. Zeigler, M. J. Keiler, J.
?C. Holman.
Commissioners or Fnr.r. Schools?Orange Parish
David L. Connor, J. R. Millions, Henry N. Sncll,
John Jordan, N. C. Whetstone, .lohn Iuabinbt, Dr.
O. N. Bowman, Samuel Dibble.
COMMISSIONER* or FnKK Seitnoi.fi?St. Matthews
Parish?Peter Buyck, H. Keller. Wostley Houscr,
John Rilcy, J. H. Felder, Adam Holman.
**ost Oillccs in Ornngclmrg District.
ujt1ck.s. yoSTMASTKltS.
Orangchurg,.,,.,,.Thao\>u?3 C Hubbell.
St.Matthews.,.Mrs. Sally Wiles.
Vance's Ferry...JL M. E. Avhi?Cr.
Branch villo.Mrs. Amy Thompson.
Fort Motte.Iidiu Hirchiuorc.
Schedule South Carolina Rail Road.
Daten Passenger.
Leave Columbia at. li.HO A. M.
o Onmgeburg at. 1 (?.::'.> A. M.
Arrive at Charleston. -\ P. M.
" " Augusta...,. i> 1'. M.
Lp Passenger,
Leave Augusta at...,...,,,.?. 7 A. M.
?? Charleston at. S A. M.
" Ornngeburg at. 1.00 P.M.
Arrive at Columbia at.,. 6.20 P. M.
Down Freight.
Leave. Orangeburg at.10 A. M.
Arrive at Charleston at. 0.10 P. M.
Up Freight.
'Leave Ornngeburg lit.1.88 P. M.
Arrive at Columbia at.0.80 P. M.
mar 28 g
POETRY.
L'Aulo-Du-Fc.
In tho hush of the winter midnight?
In (he hush of the sleeping house?
When no weird wind stirs in the gloomy firs,
The spirits of storm to rouse.
When never n glint of moonlight
Gleams from the great black sky,
By the red fire's glow, as it smoulders low,
We crouch, my letters and I.
My letters, they lie where I tossed them,
On the crimson hearlhrug there,
Still, vivid, and bright, in the ruddy light,
As cobras in their lair.
I-push the hair from my forehead,
That burns and throbs so fast,
Thinking tho while, with a strange dull smile,
(If the task 1 must do at last.
Who knows but I, tho comfort
Those foolish letters have been ?
The depth anil scope?the strength and liopc
Of those "leaves" that arc always "green'?'
Who knows but 1, how sadly,
To-morrow, 1 and my dream,
By the ashes grey will weep and say,
"Woe's me for that vanished gleam.
"The gleam of idle gladness.
The glimmer of memories bright.
That hid in each line of those letters of nunc
Those letters I lnn-n to-night ;"'
Ali well! the dream was a folly;
Its joy was an idle thing.
Its hope was a lie. and its loyalty
Died of a whisper's sting.
So a kiss?the last?to my letter-it,
A resolute hand, nod?there!
Do the sad dark eyes of my Paradise
Meet mine through the fierce flame's Hare?
?tl'MI'I.K B.\
LITERARY.
s j-j l / ; a t i: d .
?vL t '^rJ\A 15 i LA
TH*:
V II IL AW T.H It0 PIS T
a Talk of Asia mixoil
? ( ou'imut </.]
i!c was in (lie right. Tho controversy
spread through the ship, until the pilgrims
would neither eat nor drink.with each other.
Fortunate for the?, if they had been deaf;
still more fortunate lor them if they had been
dumb. Every man had a different opinion1,
and every man disputed in its honor as if it
were necessary to his existence. The color of
the camel branched into a hundred controver
sies, and each made at least :t pair of orators
ready to strangle each other.
Mustapha, irritated and impatient, at last
proposed to the Scribe that they both should
go among them ; and explaining the absurdity
of their quarreling on points for which no hu
man being could bo the better or the worse,
recommend them to pass, at least, the remain
der of the voyago in peace. "Arc we strong
enough," said the Scribe, simply, "to throw
one. half of them overboard every .day,.until
Diu you and I are left ?" -No," replied the
Bey; "but they must" be tired of lighting by
this time." "Nonsense is indefatigable." ob
served his companion. "But/' said the Bey,
<;I shall rebut their nonsense, satisfy their
reason and compel the fools to see that nothing
but mutual concession can ever produce either
general comfort or general safety." "Try,"
briefly said'the Scribe.
Next, morning, when the war of words was
at its height, and the deck was covered with
knots of enthusiasts, all descanting on their
own wisdom, and the folly of the whole human
race besides,?Musthplui came forward with
bis proposition for lnjiiijj aside .-ill quarrels on
creeds during the voyage. His figure.;lofty
arid commanding, his fine countenance, and
c;*on his embroidered robes und jewelled weap
ons hu'1 :1 powerful offect on the bystanders :
tjie pilgri'iu'S paused in their disputes, und ;:!!.
forming ;i circb: round tho glittering preacher
of peace, declared"t.'.' ir readiness to adopt an;,
plan which he thought hi to offer. Mnstapba,
elated at. the prospect of success, spoke long
and eloquently; the man of gcnijts broke out
through the habits of the Osmanli, ftild a!! bis
audience wcro enraptured. .Shouts of ..;y'-- \'~
til soon began to follow every scntcnet : h ?
spoke of the original fraternity of mankind,
and was applauded; of the dignity (if truth,
the supremacy of conscience, and the purity of
reason,?and was applauded still more; he
then powerfully described them a. combined in
the act of exhibiting to others tho same free
dom which we claim for ourselves j and in re
membering, among nil the differences of opin
ion, that the man who possesses a spirit of good
will for Iii? fellow men. holds the master key of
nil the virtues. An uproar of admiration fol
lowed the speech ; and the whole circle! cried
out that neither Stamboul nor Smyrna c?iufl pro
duce his equal, lie next proposed that every
inanjshould conic forward, and pledge himself
to general harmony. A tall Turk iustatnly ad
vanced :?"Illustrious Sonnite," ho began his
declaration?"Illustrious Sonnite !" cxrlainied
a dwnrlish, but richly clothed Persian ; "why,
son of a blind father and a deaf mother, who
told you that he was a Sonnite't All the
genius and virtue of mankind are with the
children of Ali." A blow with t ho slipper of I
a disciple of Omar told the Persian that his
opinion might not be universal. Mustapha saw
bis project broken up*at once, and cuuio for
ward to restoro pcaco. Put the tide had
turned; and be himself was assailed by enqui
ries into his faith., "Bo you believe itpfnc
holy waters of the Zcnrzcm?" cried one. "If
you do not worship the loot of Fo," cried
another, "wc only insult our ears iu'listcUiug to
you !" "]>o you twist throb hairs i f the ludy
eow's tail of the lfedjaz. round y< ur litrhnu ?"
screamed another. "Bo yon hclicvo in I'oouh?"
was the outcry of a fourth. The clamor grow
horrible. "By the print of Adam's slipper!"
yelled a gigantic Ceyloneso, "the follow is
nothing better than a spy ; and ho deserves to
he impaled on the spot ." "By the krecs of
my lathers, he is a hcrciic," howled a ferocious
Malay; "I would rather drink-his blood than
a howl of anack !" All now became clamor
and confusion; daggers, knives, seymelars and
ataghaus, Hashed round the throat of the un
lucky Mustapha. But lie was hold, was mas
ter of his weapon, and the sight of t!:e naked
poniard in one hand and his scynictnr wheeling
round his head in the other, partially repelled
the furious crowd. '.Hear me. madmen!" he
exclaimed. "Can 1 believe all your erecjls fco
gothcr f \ ou boheve none . was tnofroar ;
and they pressed closer on .lihii; "1 believe
all that reason tolls mc to hclicvo," was the
da ring reply; ??but this too, 1 bcliovo, that all
j opinions have something in them right y ? 'Use !
sentiment was partially applauded. vAnd |
also," added ho, "something in thorn i r\ig."
This was oil on flame; tlie who!.' crowd Jojusi
, , , ... , . . . v *
into ray^; tuoy ru.-hcd Up< u Ir.m .n a?: ;
he struggled desperately, hut a blow from be
hind struck the scymotar from hi* hand, lie
glanced round, and s::w the Malay ;.t liij back;
his ki'ocs uplifted to strike n mortal bl iw.
In the next, install) ho ?;tw the coiiidemmco of
the savage convulsed, heard him shriek, and
feli him failing at his feet. In tho place of the
Malay stood the young Scribe, with the dag
ger i:; his hand, which he had snatched from
the rttffian in tho momenl of fate; and bad
dyed in his heart's blood; Mustapha east a
look of thanks at bis preserver; and side by
side they retreated to the p u p. where the pil
grims dared not approach them, lint the lire
arms in the cabin were soon in the hands of
his assailants, and certain death scorned to
await him and his young companion, in this
emergency, Mustiiphn prepared to die ; but ill-:
Scribe, repeating the famous linos of Amroti,
at tho battle of Ternara?
-?Tbc eagle lakes nn eagle's (light,
The licro ian>! not die in night.'?
sprang on tho deck before him : and making a
sign of parley, proposed at once thai thoy
shoitld leave the ship to the pilgrims, and he
set on the lirsl sh >rc they saw. Muslaphu's
Id.1 boiled the idea of compromise l>u:
iiis preserver was already in the midst of tho
infuriated crowd, ami he felt that hesitation
might cost that preserver his life, lie com
plied, with bitterness of soul. The boal was
hoist.cd out. and the two exiles were rowed in
the direction of the coast. They soon .-aw the
hills above Kcyrotit ; and trod the famous soil
of Palestine. "And this comes of preaching
pence to pilgrims," said Mustapha. indignantly,
as lie looked on the parched and ruined face oi'
the country round him. "T.liis is my la.-; ex
periment ; may (he. Arab pluck oul their
boards! lor. we run tho grout est jib's ible
chance of being starved.''
"My lord, may you be happy," said tho
Scribe; "hut il'we bad remained . n board, we
.should bnly have added lo tho pbssibilil\ td'j
heilig; starved ike probability of bciii.t- drowncik
or something nbl very far from (lie certainty of|
I'll
tteintx shot.
"Bui to be thrown int-? this place Of desola
tion for ill;- jiiorc attempt (a proven! a pVirci 1
of hotheaded bigots from cutting each others
heads oil !" angrily murmured (ho Hey.
"The man who attempts to drive back (he
ocean when i( rises before the gale will lind
lliat bis labor is wasted, even il lie pjcnp'j
being sent to the bottom, lie should take il
in the calm."
"But, that such follies and furiei should
have, their origin in religion !" retorted the
Boy
" Look or. that Heaven." .-aid (he yoiinv.
Scribe And well might they look on thai
Heaven with dclighl and wonder. Ton thou
sand stars blazed above their heads, with a pure
intensity of light, an essential - lory, lo which
Mustapha had never seen I be equal even in
the .serene skiei of Asia Minor Tho sky.wa*
showered with stars, a shower of diamond. A
few faint clouds, slightly tinged with the last
hues of evening, lingered on the western hori
zon, like the last incense from some mighty al
tar. The air was still, and breathing the odor
of the sheets of wild jessamines and myrtle
which clothed the sides of the mountains; all
was richness, solemn splendor, and sacred re
pose. The vivid eye of the Hey, made to re
joice in all that filled the imagination, roved
over the boundless field of the stars of Heaven
with a delight,which kept, him silent.
"From that sky," said the youth, "which
looks one vast palace of holy trauquility. from
this fragrant air, which breaths like an offer
ing of all the treasures of nature to the Sov
ereign of Nature, descend the thunder and the
tempest, the boh that strikes tin: mountain pin
uaclcs into dust, and the hurricane that swells
the sea into destruction. And shall we wunder
that religion, bright, holy ami boundless as
those skies, should have power, from time to
time, to fill the earth with terror, to dazzle the
weak, to overwhelm the bewildered, to give an
irresistible impulse to all that is bold, imagina
tive, untamcablo, and soaring, in the heart of
man."
'?1'iit what has the dagger, or the pistol, to
do with this impulse? yet those sticklers for
their contradictory follies would have flung
me to the sharks which carried off the doctors'
of the black and white camels."
The young Scribe smiled, and simply said,
"My lord, while nine-tenth- of mankind are
fools, why were we to expect that our pilgrim
ship contained none but sages. While :ill man
kind arc creaf arcs of the passions, why were we
to supp so that a crew of enthusiasts alone
v. re incapable of being frenzied by scorn.
Hut let us p.''! lay tlie blame oh religion. To
produce great effects, we must find great pow
ers. When universal man is tobe stirred, the
evil will be stirred with the good. Hut if the
Nile, when it pours down it- Hood of fertility
I on the burning <oil of the Delta, brings weeds
into life with the harvest; is the fault in the
Nile? Or when the mighty orb that has but
just finished his course of glory in yonder
waves, ris :>> circle the world with light and
lifo. aroTwe to extinguish his beams, through
fear of the insects which he quickens in the
marsh and wilderness?" The young
speaker of these words had been roused by the
subject into unusual fervor. His pale counten
ance had suddenly lighted up, and as he gazed
on the firmament, unconscious of all things
bit! the glory which had awoke his feelings,
the Roy found it impossible to withdraw his
eyes from its' animated beauty. The expressive
features flushed with new intelligence. The
glance, always powerful, seemed to catch, new
brilliancy from the splendors above. F.vcu the
voice sec tue I to be changed. Always sweet, it
w;i now lofty and solemn, yet it touched the
spirit of the hc.rcr more than in its softest
moments. It was once music to his ear; it
was how conviction to hi. soul. Ti.e haughty
warrior, the proud phil isopher, the conscious
superior of every mind that he had till now
encountered, all Lave way ; and flinging him
self on the neck of his friend, Must a pit a
pledged himself by every light blazing in that
sky of serenity never to part from his
young sage, his counsellor, the tamer of his
follies, and the guide of his existence.
The Scribe suddenly disengaged himself
from this impetuous instance of friendship,
I with one sirugvling hand .-;':!! held in the
r:tri? of Mustapha. and the other pressed
closely t<> his forehead, turned away in .-ilt ncc.
I "Hear me now," said 11 it- impatient Hey "once
for all; I abandon all eagerness to interfere in
other men's concerns. This voyage, this hour,
have given nie wisdom worth a life. And if ever
M iistapha,llcn M list a pint troubles his bruin about
making fools wiserthan nature intended them to
be; about giving experience to slaves incapable
of thought ; or teat hing toleration to traders in
bigotry ? nliiy be go the way of lite doctors j or
worst;, may lie be parted from Iiis first and last
of frien Is, even front his young pluldsophcrV'
The young philosopher answered this burst of
sentimeiii only with one of his quiet smiles,
and drawing his turban St ill deeper on his brows,
itn i wi I i ing Iii- mantle closer round him, re
im i ked I lint t he: night- was at hand, and that
sonic village should be .-ought for, where they
might find shelter and entertainment. Mus
tapha. in til'' ardour of tho moment, would
have despised the aid of man, and remained
? ay.ing on the stars, and listening to the wis
dot i of his > unpanion. Hut :i gtisl from the
sea. followed by the rising- roar of thunder
among l! i hills, awoke bint to the realities of
the wilderness; and, anxious for the safely of
so fragile ;? frame as that of his fellow traveler
i:r followed the sounds of the baying' dogs, and
mi occasional blast of a horn which sounded on
the night air, until he found himself suddenly
call d on to stop. Ho was in the front of a
troop of Arab horsemen. ??Fly, or surrender
at once," whispered the Scribe. ??The panther
is. lord in the desert."
? The li >n m vor flics," was the hold excla
mation < f tl> Hey. as ho drew his scymotar.
The Arab. : ?? in- the flash, returned it by a
general fire of their muskets, and rushing on
in tho smoke, to their astonishment, they found
that instead of a troop of some hostile tribe,
they bad but a single enemy, the handsomest
of Moslem, who still defied them. They burst
out into laughter at bis presumption, and at
the same moment a dozen fellows leaped from
their horses, and threw themselves upon him.
lie struggled desperately, but a feeble voice
reached his car. which totally unmanned him.
By the gleam of a torch be saw his friend in
the bands of a crowd of tlje Arabs, who were
carrying him away; and to his still deeper
terror, he saw a long line of blood trickling
from beneath bis turban. He felt himself in
stantly powerless, and flinging away his weapon,
yielded at once. The captives were carried in
triumph lo the camp ; where Mustapha's jewels
were infinitely admired and plundered to the
last stone. Hut his true sorrow was fur the suf
ferings ofdiis wounded friend j The lley was in
consolable for the misfortune, which ho attribu
ted entirely to bis own rashness. "Well was it
said by llaliz." ho exclaimed in bitterness, "that
he who takes the wolf by the throat, should
first see that his tusks are plucked out." The
young Scribe pointed with his slight finger up
ward, and said with a faint smile. ''The skies
are as bright above this lent, as they were on
the sea shore. The run will rise to-morrow, as
he. rose yesterday. W'e are it: hands stronger
than the hands of the Arab. The. first refuge
of the fearful, but t!o< l:ssl refuge of the brave,
is despair."
[Coucliutctl in our Aei/.]
M 1 S C \ <] L L A N K 0 U S.
Tho President at Boston.
During the President's speech at Boston,
which was confined lo thanks to the public for
courtesies to him as a citizen and Chief Magis
trate, three cheers for Congress were called for
from outskirts of audience. The cheers wove
not given. During Mr. Howard's speech three
cheers for North Carolina were called for.
Mr. Howard said you may well give three
cheers for the Stale of North Carolina. She
was the first State to put forth the Declaration
of Independence in the Revolution against
(Trent llritain. Von may well give three
cheers for North Carolina. She was the State
of eleven who seceded last, and went most re
luctantly but of the Union. You may well
give three cheers for North Carolina. She
! was the first of the eleven whos seeded to come
j back again to the ily liri side oi'ihe Union
?ami. to day, notion . is wanting for her to
resume her ancient, 1 uorable 1 most patri
otic pi sit ion in the family of the Kepublie, but
(he consent of the people oi" Massachusetts, j
Now. 1 know that all that is coming about, is
coming about very soon. I have seen the
earth and the skies full of the elements of for
I tiliiy of health and of vigor, and I saw in
[North Carolina the Cotton spring up which is
{ to supply, next year, the mills of Massachu
setts. I have seen in New York the wheat
growing that is to supply tho West Indies and
the Southern States. I know that nature de
signs that this whole continent, not merely
these thirty-six States, 1>w; this whole conti
nent, should be. sooner or later, within the ma
gic circle of the American Union.
Bismarck's Private Secretary.
Dinner is over. It is well nigh midnight.
Putbus is sleeping. Only a single light still
sparkles through the autumnal frees of the
Park. It leads us to the pleasant villa near
the Prince's kitchen-garden.
Count Bismarck is still awake; but he is no
longer the same gay talker, the amiable, witty
companion, such as we have scon him at din
! iicr. In the dead of night he i< again Prime
Minister.
lie wlio has come to Iiiigen to repose from
his toils, sits at a desk covered with papers:
his right hand is closed : hi: face looks almost
gloomy; tho thoughtful brow is clouded; the
iron Count is at work. He reflects long and
profoundly; and then he dictates a dispatch.
Hut where is his private secretary, to write
what he dictates t
The Prime Miiiistci has not lakon a private
secretary, nor any of the officers of jus depart
ment with him to llugcn ; hut at a side-table
with a lain]), sits a lady, modest, plainly dress
ed ; her brow beaming with great intelligence.
She quickly writes what tho minister dictates
to her.
Wc know this lady; Wp learned already to
esteem her ; now wc admire hi sr. Tho Coun
tess Bismarck is not only a loving wile to him,
an excellent nurse to him in his bodily ailments,
a devoted mother to his children ; she is, be
sides, the iron Count's faithful, indefatigable
assistant in his grave toils.
When King .lames' "tutor lay upon h s ex
piring pillow, hh majesty scut to inquire how
bo did; "(lo tell." said ho, "my royal sover
eign thai 1 am oitig where few Kinns tro."
One of the Alabama frccdmen applied Ut
to Governor Pntton for a divorce on the ground
that his wifo couldn't be coming home every
week, and he knew another woman who would
do very well.
"Conic till America, ,Pat 1" writes nf'*op of
the Emerald Tslc to his friend in Ireland;!''tin
a fine country to get a Hviri' in. All jc have
to do is to get a three-cornered box mid fill it
wid bricks, and carry it till the top of a Ihren
story building, and the man at tho lop docs all
the work." V
An Irishman ordered a barber shop while
drinking ate with the brush a cup of lather,
dug out the ball of soap at the bottom ttf the
cup. at that, and sat down to warm his feet;.
"How did you like your lunch ?"'- asked a
bystander. ... *
"The custard was illcgant,"but by my soul. I
b'lavc the egg was a little to long in the wa
ter !" ." . .
"Well, Jane, this is a queer world." said a
"brute" to his wife, after breakfast recently,
"A set of woman philosophers have just sprung
up"
"Indeed," said Jane, "and what do they
hold?" -";
"The strangest thing in nature," said lie;
"they hpld their tongues."
.Sharp'promising little boy, just learning to
talk well:
"Father arc yon going to.see thr nice to
day?" - ? ? . ,
Father, brightening up?"What raeey :fny
son, will there be?" * % ? . 1
"The human race." . ,
Husband to wife?"Mary Ann, that boy wilJ
be an editor's pet."
Wife?(.Jod forbid."
A Green Customer.?A few days since n
gentleman called upon some lady friends, am!
wan shown into tho parlor bye servant! girl.
She asked him what name she should announce,
and he. wishing to take them by surprise, re
plied, "miens," (a friend.) The girl seemed
at first a little piu/.led, but quickly regained
her composure, and, in the blandest manner
possible, observed, "What kind of a euas did
you say. sir ?"
A provost marshal writes : One of the pro
vost guard brought a colored man into tbe
office, charged with stealing water-melons. As
he was being led away, T said to him:
? I hope. Tom, that I may never see you
here again."
lie turned to me with a peculiar, shrewd
expression, and said :
? You wouldn't ha'seen mc dis fhae. tap'n,
if de sogers hadn't a fetch mc."
A certain green customer, who wa* a sttqngcr
to mirrors, and who stepped into tfce ;enbin of
one of our ocean steamers, stopped i? front' -of
a large pier glass, which he took for u-donr,
and seeing his own reflection, he said: ?*\[\
"I say, mister, when does this ere boat
start?" v ' m" M
C?Otting; no answer from the dumb reflection
before him, he again repeated:
"I say, mister, when does thin c?o - boat
start?" ? Ii'
Incensed at tho silent figure*, he/ then broke
out:
"Go to thunder ! ye cursed sassafras Colored,
shockheaded bull calf; you don't look as if yo? *
knew much anyhow I"
A R.vrn ku Inquisitive Yan kee.?:While
Lord CJrosvenor was traveling West, he was
one day waiting at a country station Ibra tardy
train, when one of the farmers of the neigh"
... 1
borhood entered into conversation with him :
"Been about these part4 considerable, stran
ger?"
"Yes, for some length of time-"'
"Like 'em pretty well, eh?"
"Yes, pretty well."
"Ifow lung have yer bin here?"
"A few weeks "
"What's yer business ?'T
"I have no business."
'?What- are yer traveling for then?
'?Only for my own pleasure."
"Don't yer do any business ? How do yer
get yer living, then ?"
"It isn't necessary for me to work for my
support. My father is a man of property, antl
gives me an allowance sufficient for all my
wants."
"But, 'sposo the old man should die ?"
"In that case I dare say he'd leave me
onough to live upon."
'?Rut, 'spose he should bust up?"
Here the conversation ended, and Loiil
Grosvonor walked away, evidently struck with
a new idea.

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