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The Orangeburg news. (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, July 13, 1867, Image 1

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K03VEE8; OTJH STATE; EINA-LI/T. THtti NATION; THESE CONSTITUTE OTJTt' CpUNTEY.'''"r~'
~ . . NUMBER 21
SATURDAY M^RNINf JULY 13, 186T.
?J f
1
PUBLISHED AT OR AN G EBURG, 0. #
ferery Saturday Morning.
fjV , M^5^ DIBBLE, Editor. .
^^gtiAitLESJi: HALL, Pnllisher,
'.?'? ??to:?*- ?
ri ; f?ne.Copy for one jtw^^a...,......'..". $2.00
...t.| vttnl . .Meatha).?^u-.,....k? liOO
?.;u.,^V a-^ Three *4 60
AityonetnnVmgupaCHJIi of FITB ?TTO?AL
STOftCEltftfiRS will receive an extra copv
' FREE OF CHARGE.
.... , , ?1 . . ... ,
?1*1". -f?t V.itr - . :.
RATES OP ADVERTISING.
1 Square 1st Insertion.....$1.60
? ' ?? ? 2d ". 76
A Sq?are consists of 10 lines Brevier or one inch
tp^Advcrtlslng space.
Contract Advertisements inserted upon the most
^jpfotfal terms.
... ;? ?'.-> -t.o:
; MAURI AGB and FUNERAL NOTICES, not cx
ccrding one Square, -inserted*without charge.
'?:7i.; ? .
:?? ? * . ? *":o:
te* Term* Cash fit Advance. -?i
! 1 'Po^forther particulars, apply, to Mo. OiiAftLr.* II.
Halt., ornddress
??I if '? SAMUEL DIBBLE,
.U ? ;' Kurtou OnANaRn?n|>~NKWf<.
Orangebnrg, S. C.
?'?V,y ?
PUBLIC OFFICERS.
'' Jeb o. Jy
ORANGERUItO DISTRICT.
K - ' ?
OnnisA^t?I*. A. MeMlehneL
, ??
? ;CoMMik?fiQ?c?rB in EgriTY?V. D, V. Jamison.
Ci.KiiK or Cocat?Joseph "F. Robinson.
Rjir.mrr?J. W. II. Dukes.
Tax C?11.iTK^Tt1?^liS^<-Jr^Vgc 1 vsVrist
"?St. Matthews Parish.?W. .11. DanUl
A sir*. Aasv.sso? U, S\ .1U:vkxi:i;.?George
.'Sturgeon.
Auknt rou Stamps, ke;?P. V. Dibble.
*'?,J^*OtiiT,ttATBS-/rhomaB P. Stokes, W. 11. Tread
' Well, A. J. Oasklns, F. W. Fairy, David L. Connor,
J. II. Felder, Levin Argoe, R. V. Dannelly, E. A.
Price, W. L. Ehney, J. D. Pricket, Samuel R. Moor
' cr^ C.'U. Olovcr, E. C. Holma'n, P. C. Buyck, F. M.
Wannamaker, D. O. Tindull.
CoHMis^ioKcns to Approve Securities?J. GI
Wannamaker, James Stokes, D. B.-Barton, Adam
Smoke, A. D. Frederick.
? >* Commissioners or Public Bvildinos?Wm. M.
Krtson, Harpin Rlggs, E. Ezekiel, Joseph P. Ilnr
' ley, F. H. W. Briggmann.
CoamiflsiosKits or Roads?Orange Parish?West
ley If onseY, P. W. Fairy, Samuel M. Fairy, Samuel
tf.'Fatt, F<. Livingston, W. 8. Rlley, West ley Culler,
"ili^C. Wannamaker, N. E. W. Sistrunk, II. Living,
?ten, James Stokes, J. D. Knolts, R. P. Am ley, John
? S. Bowman, J. L. Moorer, W. C. Moss, Lewis fin.
rick, B. A. Yon, J. II.'O'Cain, Ellison Connor, John
Brodic, J. G. Quignard, Jacob Cooner, George
Byrd, J. T. Jennings, David Dannelly.
COMMISSIONERS or Roads?St. Matthews Parish?
C< S. i>*rby, W. -C. Hane, M. K. Ilobnan, Andrew
Tlouscr, j. ?. Parlour, E. T. Shular, J. L. Parlour,
Owen Shular, T. O. ?fcular, W. L. Tou, J. W. Sel
lers, R. W. Dates, J. W. llarliour, Augustus Avin
ger, P. W. Avlnger, J. D. Zeigler, M. J. Kellor, J.
' C. Holm an.
CeauissioHKRs or Fan Sciioota??Orange Parish
David L. Connor, J. R. Miitious, Henry N. Snell,
John Jordan, N. C. Whetstone, John Inabinet, Dr.
O. N. "BoWman, Samuel Dibble.
, , CoMMiesidNEBS or Fukb Schools?St. Matthews
Parish?Peter Buyok, J. II.-Keller, West ley Houser,
J-rdm Riley, J. H. Felder, Adam Holman.
^i5t Offices in Orangebnrg District.
? '-'ce?. postmasters.
of* *
.Thaddeua C. Hubbell.
ififfi'V ....Mrs. &1WJ. Wiles.
St.. ?foffk*Wm<".??? . v\?inot? . .
? ywwp'? Vmy,,n>nu,,,....% AY*n8er
firaneW\\?t,,,,im,iit?????.Mr?. Amy laC.^oa.
?Port M)0.t^o;ff,?f??#/?/?t,/?,?John Blrohmore.
Schedule SontH CftroUiw Bail RowJ,
Down Pas*cnffflr,
Leave Columbia at.>mh,hmi? 0,110 A. M.
Orangeburg at.?? 10,}}9 A. M.
Arrive at Charleston..........i P> M.
** ** Augusta. 6 V, Mi
Up Passenger.
'Leave Augusta at.,..(.... 7 A. M
? m Charleston at.?....?.... 8 AM.
? Opangehuvg at. 1.0O P. M.
, Amvo at Columbia at.6.20 P. M.
Down Freight.
LcavAOpangoburg at.10 A- Irt
;'j\rr|!6at0harlostonat. 0.10 P. M.
? iri.. - Up Freight.
? {.a * . . -
? ??Leave Orangeburg el.~.L8? P. M,
Arrive *i Columbia at..?f/iVcU?^fi.v**f^*: M?
par 23 g <P
ORKHNAL POETRY.
. [ion THE ?RANOKliupo NEWS.]
Vm iteary of Living.
11X PAN.
I'm woary of living,?
Believe me, 'tis t rue?? *
Where the people complain* ?
Whatever you do:
Be. Saint, or be sinner,
'Tis even the same,
They'll watch you, and "spot" you,
And always com plain.
? '. ' , - ? \y
B? cvor so temperate, ?
Touch not n "strong drop,"
Fly as for dear life
From' every grog-shop,?
.The world will then hoot you>
"(.Mi l what a weak mind;
Can't (rust a four glasses
Of porter and wnio."
Thon, just vice versa-?
Do all in your might
To make mannish people
Believe you're "all right;"
Drink rum and drink brandy?
Drink whiskey and gin?
Then listen?they cry out
?,A Sot,?deep in sin!"
Then frequent the churches,
Put on a long face,'
Sit. close to the altar,
An image of grace,
Or, bo still better yet,
Join in with the choir
Then hear?"He's a hypocrite,
A cheat and a liar."
Thon I'm weary of living,
As sinner, or Saint,
Where people continually
Arc niaking.complaint;
And where even the ladies
Are so full of art,
That they're always deceiving
Your soul and your heart.
Just speak (o the creatures
Your hope and your love,?
Swear that you worship,
By angels above;?
Say fondest a^feuturns
....... .>?_........
"As long a
Then sco how they'll roll up
The whites of their eyes,
Your love and utfectious
Contemn and despise;
But make them an offer
Of land and of gold,
And they'll give you their hand, ere
Your tale is well told.
Yes, I'm weary of living;
But,?give me a drink?
Here's a toast to the ladies,
For what they may think ;
What though they deceive us,
'Tis natural I guess,
And the least we say of it
Perhaps is tho best.
But I'm weary of living,
Believe it or not,
With such a Bad crow,
There's always a plot,
Working, deceiving.
And using all art,
To make a man anxious
From earth to depart.
LITERARY.
: E E LEGT E D .
MUST-A-IPEC A
THE
PHILANTHROPIST.
A TALK OF ASIA MINOR.
[ConclMlcti.]
The tribo tnoved to another pasturage, and
they curried their prisoners along with them.
To Mustaphn, tho Knranmnian lord, this life of
hardship would once havo been ?intolerable.
Whci'w were his slaves, his banquets, his min
strels, his bail:8. uis perfumes'! He saw round
him nothing hut tiiC horsohair curtains of his
tent, and boyond them the u?ods of the wilder
ness, Hte food was Harbs, his perfumes were
the wild breath of tho decort shrubs, hlc com
panions were tho ttcdowcon. Yot, what is man
but tho child of circumstance! Ho had ab
jured all his luxuries, for ho hud found them
insufficient to fill up tho aching void of his
mjnd. Ho now had health, exercise, and nn
objopt. Tho bravery of his dofencc had ex
torted tho applause of the Arabs ; his noble
figure, tfommnnding countenance and match
less dextovity in urms, had soon equally forced
their admiration. They gave him a now name
in their oxpcdltlous ; ho was tho ".Leopard,"
and their sheik finally crowned tho homago of
the tribe, by tho offer of his only child, tho
gazelle-eyed Ayesnti j Vrith n thousand sheep
and a hundred camels an u dowry. Tbc pros
?poet wns .enough to torn the? brain of any
young Jiero of tho desert* The husband of
the lair Ayosha must'suc&aod to tho headship
of tho tribe,-?two thousand horse men of the
Bcni Kohlnni, masters of the finest pastures,
rtyiowued for the fleetest horses, and still more
renowned for having baffled tho pnshns of
Syria, in every qncounter, for the last hundred
yours. Tho Bey wont to tho tent of his young
counsellor,, who was now- rapidly recovering
from the effects of the Arab musquck Ho
eommuniratod the generous proposal. * \.
, "It offers all that a warrior can desire," was
tho roply.
^'But I hate forsworn tho warrior," was tho
answer.
It offers much that the man of ambition
might covet," said the Scribe.
"But I have abandoned all that boars the
name of ambition," said the Bey.
"But it offers something to the cyo," said
the Scribe j "for tho daughter of the sheik is
amoving the handsomest of tho Bedoween.
But tho. truo question is what it offers to the
heart?"
. The speaker pronounced tho words in a low
tone, and remained evidently waiting an an
swer.
"I have tenfold forsworn that follysaid
Mustapha, impatiently; "the heart is not con
cerned in the marriages of the Moslem."
There was silence for a time. At length the
Bey added, "but, my friend, the judgo who is
to decide on ury case, should know. all. I never
saw tho face of woman, that I thought of a
second moment,?but one."
"The name of that'ono ?" osked the Scribe,
with a tone, which seemed to borrow of ita im
patience ironi the Boy.
"I know not," was tho answer.
The listener had taken a cup of sherbet from
the attendant, and was tasting it with his
parched lips, when the enquiries of Mustapha
arrested his baud.
? "Is sho yet among the living ?" asked he.
Still, "1 know not," was the answer. "Sho
was seen but for a moment. Yet, her beauty
has ?haunted me to this hour. Many a long
day it made "mo restless and wretched. I.
sought' her, but. in vain. It may hiivo been
among Iho oiiiiw whw.l. t?>i..l.? me the. h.dii<jr..T_
dni, the slave of impulses, full oft the fever of
the mind, always rush, always ropontantj ?
wanderer. *a visionary, n madman." He cov
ered his forehead with his hands; and struggled
evidently with strong emotion. "But," added
he, "I now speak of those things for the last
time. On my march to Constantinople at tho
head of my cavalry, as wo encamped on the
plain bordering the Bosphorus, our position
was accidentally crossed by a train from the
seraglio. My troopers were wild fellows, and,
unacquainted with the forms ol state, they
broke loose and galloped up to the procession.
This produced a cry of horror from the atten
dants, und the startled camels ran away with
their burdens. One of their little tents was
overthrown at my foot, and from it 1 raised
the lovliost being that the eye of man ever
gazed on. She was fainting, and for the mo
ment I looked unrestrained on beauty worth}'
of Paradise. But the attendants soon- came
up; nothing but tho threats of my horsemen
prevented my instantly falling by the hands of
the janizaries j the tent was replaced upen the
camel, and a vision departed from my eyes that
to this hour has shut out every other from my
heart."
Mustapha, as he uttered the words, rushed
from the tent; sprang upon his steed, and gal
lopod for leagues into the depths of the desert,
to recover Iuh trunquility. On his return, he
found tho tribe preparing to march to the at
tack of tho great cavern from Tripoli. Ho
marched with it, distinguished himself at the
head of a chosen troop in a night assault, in
which ho took the Pasha of Sidon prisoner,
nod returned with the greatest prize of Syrian
corn ill?*1 n:i<* cvcr Kract'^ tnc annals of plun
der.
All tho tribo lauded i.'j" to the skies; the
warriors worein raptures; and e?'.or.V woman
was instantly busied at the corn mill. .Mus
tapha went out to view thoin in their occupa
tion ; but his cyo was instantly struck by the
coarseness of the national contrivance. lie
found five hundred women doing with tho old
hand-mill less work than with a little ingenuity
might bo done with a- hundreth part of the
labor and the time. "With wind, canvass and
wood, any thing," said he, "may bo done."
His invention was instantly active, and in a
few days he gave a model for tho construction
of a mill, which worked wonders. ? Tho wo
men wore delighted to get rid of the troublo;
the Sheik was delighted to cat bread which
wns not half stona ; and all woro delighted at
the genius which had raised in tho midst of
their tribe, a machine requiring nothing but a
blast of wind, to mako it iro on grinding till
doomsday. The women, determined to escape
tho drudgery for tho future, instantly brjkc
every hand-mill that they could find j and
Mustapha was at tho height of popularity,
The new muchino becamo famous, before tho
week was at an cud. But fame excites envy,
and fflJ^ifj tho worst of peace-makers. The
Bon! A^bubocker,&bne of the moat powerful
tribenjt ,$he Hauran, had heard of this oxtra
ordilaj^ invention, and rcsolyed either to scizo
it, cf destroy a work which promised to turn
the mill-wheel into the philosopher's stone.
They /moved in great force against tho Beni
Kolldui. A battle followed, desperately con
tosbdi in which Mustapha again distinguished
bin self . -But the rumor had now reached as
fn?nabbe coasts of tho Bod Seaj tribe on tribe
w?re feustcring to seize this mighty structure,
wMc& was said to be tho work of inagio,
sceres wrung directly from tho lips of tho gol
doa ij jage of Solomon. A council of war was
held,'^n which it was resolved to.fly that night
froiu/<ihis~ overwhelming superiority. But,
wlia/ was to be done with the great structure {
towwpd abovo all their tents. To carry it
awaj Was impossible in the rapid march of the
tribe-J. to leave it was disgrace. It.wus there
fore jto be burned. Tho tribe marched at twi
ligh^ and its flame lighted them many a leaguo
over-!the plain. They at leDgth haltod, and
the Dtovisiotis were to be prepared. But the
contusion was now universal. Even the old
han?<-inills would have bocu better than none.
The tribe rushed round tho tent of Mustapha,
nssming him by overy namo of guilt, for hav
ing oewitched them, first into war with all
ith^yraicighui^fo, Slid nOXt, iutO Gating Com UU
grotj?d; an insult worthy of the magician's
blow*' Tho Bey was thunderstruck. He al
most tore his beard in vexation. "Yet," he
extlatmcd, "it is not these savages that I blame,
so ioich as tho fool who could not leave them
tu their own wits. By Allah, I desorvo to dio
by the needles of the women, for the absurdity
id'J.hinking that the present goncratiou could
not' manage to live, eating .grit in the meal, us
wcfi'uR their forefathers did." But this wis
dojjtt was now too late. A guard who had
j'ped on unground corn'' were placed upon
i tout, and he was ordered for public execu
ti$t nfflay-brcak.
a^hd'ur after midnight, he was awakened
sound of a knife cutting through the
ffio tent. Tho young Scribe had thus
ay to him.
W," said he, "at last resolved to
"^orld .to lie aviso lu Ua own coed
luataphu lifted his eyes and hands to
"Have you," continued the interroga
ted never to think of teaching the
knowledge of men to children ? Havo you re
solved to try what it is good in the old, before
you hurry on the new ? One quest ion more,?
have 3'ou resolved to give up the honors of a
sheik's son-in-law, and never to wed till you
see once again the vision of the Bosphorus ?"
Mustapha sprang from his scat at the words.
Three horses were piqucttcd in rear of the
tent. Ou one of them was already mounted
the captive pasha of Sidon, who acted as their
guide j and tho fugitives wore soon far from
the camp of .the Beui Kohlaui. At the dawn
they were galloping along the shore; a ship
wus oft" the coast; they .hailed it, and found
themselves in the Venetian vessel which had
brought the pilgrims. To Mustapha's enquiry
as to his converts, the answer was, "that they
had never quarrelled, from tho day ho had
ceased the attempt to reconcile them."
The vessel dropped anchor in the gulph of
Macri, and Mustapha viewed the shore of Asia
with immeasurable longing. The young Scribe
divined his emotions and said, -'My lord, you must
return to your country, and take the station
your birth, feelings, and talents, mark for your
own."
"No! my inheritance is now in the hand of
another," said Mustapha bitterly; l,thc sword
of my fathers is rusted in tho sheath of their
son. Wo must find some lonely hill, or un
known hermitage, and die together."
"Never !" exclaimed the Scribe. ' The
daughter of the Sultan was not made to be his
follower whom she could not honor as her hus
band."
As the words were uttered, the slight hand
was raised to the forhend, and the deep turban
which had so long shaded the countenance was
thrown back. Mustapha started with a cry of
astonishment- The vision of the Bosphorus
stood before him?S.hercne, the daughter of the
king of kings of the cast. With ninny a blush
and many a sigh tho lovely being Md the tale
of her overcharged heart. Sho had nov*..\?' for
gotten the noble aspect of tho chieftain whom
she bad seen on the plains of Scutari. The
agony of knowing that his generous spirit was
exposed to the jealousies of a Turkish cabinet,
still more than to tho hazards of war, drove her
to tho wild expodient of following him to his
dungeon. Sho had, from that hour, been his
guardian nugol. His lesson of life was now
fully given; his impetuosity was transmuted
into forethought, and his precipitate zed to
change all the world for tho better, into the
enquiry how to mako the bcjst of it as it is.
On this evening his' eye fell accidentally ou
tho emerald signet, which, in memory of his
father, he had retained in ul) his vicissitudes.
To his titter astonishment, tfyti cloudy surface
was briUiautly clear, and the characters yhonc
like flushes of lightning. He read on the sig
net the word?)
"For all things there is a time.
. Indolence is behind the'time.
Rashness Is before the time.
Wisdom Traits the time."
Shercno was at his aide While he read the mya-.
tery. As lio looked up in her fine countenance
illumined by the suddon splendor of the talis
man, he thought that he had nover soeu lovoli
ness before The check suffused with rose, and
the magnificent eye, looked to hini like the
'evening star shining in the sunset. *'Thc
vision of the Bosphorus is f?rgotten,,r h? ox
claimcd, gazing on her .with the rapt glance of
a worshipper. Tlic princess g?ve an involun
j tary start, and her lip grew pale. "Forgotten,"
exclaimed the lover,?-"but it is, in the pre
sence of an houri 1" A tear of delight glit
tered in her eye, the check was burning crim
son again, she fell on his neck, and in that
sacred embrace they pledged those vows which
aro not to be dissolved by the power ?f man.
The Boy had found the true motive for. ac
tion. He flew to his province ; his vassals re
ceived him with universal acclamation. All
opposition perished before their triumph at
seeing the heroic Bon of their old prince among
thciu again. But their wonder was his bride,
the princess Sherene Ilalibi. They honored
her unequalled loveliness 5 but they worshipped
her bencvolcnco, the loftiness of her genius,
and the purity of her virtue. In the midst of
the bridal, the Tartar of the court galloped up
to the palace. He bore on hi? b?ad the fir
maun of the Sublime Porte, giving the patern
al benediction, and appointing the Bey to the.
Pachalic of the great provinco of Karamania.
K. S. E.
MISCELLANEOUS.
The First Anniversary of American In
dependence in Charleston, S. C.
We have before us a copy of the South
Carolina and American General Gazette,
dated Thursday, July 10, 1777. It is vol
ume* 20, number 966, and was printed in
f.'MmvWuNii, by It. * "Wells & Sun, at tip
old printing house, great stationery and book
store. The quaint stylo and autiquated
appearance of tho paper at once attract
attention, but it is chiefly Valuable because it
contains an account of the first celebration of
the 4th or July as a national anniversary. The
article is'so interesting that we rcpnblish it en
tire, aud our renders can compare the sa*yings
and doings of ye olden time with those of the
present day:
"Last Friday, July 4, being the first anniver
sary ofthat memorable ./Era, American Inde
pendency, was ushered in with the ringing of
bells and a general display of the American
colors on all the forts and shipping. Tho
Charleston militia and artillery wore reviewed
by his Excellency the President, his Honor
the Vice-president, the Honorable Members
of the Privy Council, &c. At 1 o'clock the
great guns of the different fbrta (Fort Moul
tric boginning) wore fired to the number of
seventy-six, alluding to tho year 1776, when
the thirteen United States emancipated them
selves from the British yoke. An elegant en
tertainment was given at the Council Cham
ber by his Excellency the President to such of
the members of the Legislature as were in
town, to the clergy, civil and military officers,
and a number of other gentlemen. After din
ner, the following thirteen toasts wore given,
each accompanied by thirteen discharges from
the field pieces belonging to Captain Grimball's
Artillery Company, via:
1st. The Free Independent and Sovcricgn
States of America.
2d. The Great Council of America?May
wisdom preside in all its deliberations.
3d. General "Washington.
4th The American Army and Navy?May
tlioy be victorious and invincible
?s 5th. Tho Nations in Friendship or Alliance
w*$h America?
Gul The American Ambassadors at Foreign
Courts.
7th. The 4th of July.
8th. The momory of officers and soldiers
who have bravely fallen In defence of Amer
ica. 1 ,
9th. South Carolina.
iCth. May only those Americans enjoy
freedom who are ready to die for its defenoe.
11th. Liberty Triumphant.
12th. Confusion, Shamo and Disgrace to the
Kncmios?May tho foes to America (slaves to
tyranny) humbly fall before hor.
13th. May the rising States of America
reach the summit of human power and gran
dour and enjoy every blessing.
In the evening thcro wcro illuminations and
firoworks nnd tho wholo happily couoludcd
without the least accident or disturbance.
In tho same paper aro several proclamations
from bis excellency Jno. Rutledge, the Gover
nor of tfJb State, which rooall forcibly the Stir
ling tiuicr, ttuoucrh which we have just passed.
TJac Gaulle was, one ofthp 'jf? PftRei?
in Charleston, and Ha tinj^ ?iaincd -columno- ^
contain many names that are., famii'mr^ pn?S
others who hayc all passed away in the ninety- '
years interim between the iai celetft^o? of
the 4th and to-day.?CJiarlaio* A^crl "'"' 4 .a.
HTJMO RO
?i-:-'??tjz?. ..l m v-.dr;
Which is tho nearest sound to the Isle., off*
Dogs ??Barkisg Creek,'\?s ahp^ima^^
Why is a dog's tail a- gtcat^iwtchjr l**y*Bb*>.;
causc .no one ever saw it before.
If two hogsheads make a p'pe, how 1 iuany
will make a cigar ? '?'"' Ms f^Wsftl
. . ( ' ?/! .?>?:r.->l'>i_?..
Whai remark ought a gcutlomnn to.maie to;
a friend when showing him a box of imjported
cigars ??Havana (have-any).? ? ? t.; v .T
An Irishman* OUce obsotved that irtilc-stdncs
werc kind enough to answer your quelrtioirs'
without giving you the trouble" to ask' them:
_ -?? ???--.?; - r}^: ?
"What's the matter, Uncle Jerry1 ' said
Mr, ??; as old Jeremiah was' passing'
by, growling most ferociously. : i f .(.
"Matter I" said the old man, stopping sljort;
'why, here I've been lugging Watof, all. the
morning for Dr. C-'s wife to jwash . wjtlh
and what d'ye s'poso I got for it ??" - }
' Why, I suppose about ten cents," , answer^
cd Mr.*?. . , . '
'Ten cents 1 8he told me the Doctor would
pull a tooth for me some time." .
1 " ? im .. !?? t,::<rt?-'
The Rulicgh Frogres* gives this dialogue:
Army Chaplain "My ycung colored friend,
cau y6u read ?'* - ...> yfa&^n'ji ?
Contraband?"Yes, sah" ? ??;'<$M&>
? Army Chaplain?"Glad to hear it. jSh?U I
give you a paper 1 . .
Contraband?"S?rtin, massa, rf you'please."
Army Chaplain?"Very good; what paper
would you choose V*
Contraband?"Well? massa) if you chews,
I'd take a paper of terbackcr."
The chaplrin looked looked at the contra-:
band, add the contraband at tho chop lain ;tlioti
tho latter sighed and passed oh. '" V ? v'T' -?
.: . .: ?..?.?c.i'-" ???.,-.-?t: ***?si?i ??..'..
- "f" '??'""*"?'mmum 11 - ? -,?
A Lawyer built him an office in tho form.of
a hexagon, or six square. The novelty of the
structure at tract c d the attention of Rome Irish
men who were passing by $ they made a f?ll
stop and viewed the building very critically.'
The lawyer, somewhat disgusted at their curi
osity, lifted up the window, put his bead out
and addressed them. :
"What do you stand there for like a pact of
blockheads, gazitijpat my office; do you 'take
it fur a church ?"
"Faix," answered one of them, "I was think
in' ?os till I saw the divil poke his - head out of
the "windy." , ' |.
Hinte to Formers.
.-?'??-'' /
What Hoc* to Use.?In planting or hoeing
corn, use the ordinary hoes in general usoi
Neither Indian Rubber hose nor cotton 'hose
would bo of any. account in a corn field; no
more than would one of Hoe's eight-cylinder
presses. ? -.
How to Hold the Plough.?Don't try to hold
it out at nrm's length. You can't do it. ' t*I
If 3'ou havn't a plough of your own, get out
an attachment on your -neighbor's, who owes
you. Any justice will tell you whether you
can hold it or not. *' ?
The Best Time to put t* Rye.^?l nskWd\rt
old farmer once what was the best time' to put
rye ? Ho looked at his watch and replied j
"This is about iny hour."
Tho ryo was immediately put in. ?H**1
All seasons nrc tho same for putting in rye;
How to Keep Com.?The best place to keep
corn is in a good corn house, though sonic pre
fer to kcop it in tho system?in the j?tco.' 'if
they don't keep corn thoy keep corned: i *
Easy Way to Draw Saw Log*.?Draw them
on a pieco of paper with a crayon pencil. Af
ter a litt le practice you will bo able1 to ''draw"
tho largest kind of saw logs with case.
Fork.?Packing thread is of no use i:? pack
ing pork. In curing hams the tune varies.
Hams that have got trichina can't be cured at
all.
Fences and F-xeiug.?'iood fencing is os
scntinl on a farm. Get a good "fencing mas
ter" to learn yon. Yon can't repair a worut
fence by taking vermifuge. Neither can yoU
but good whitewash brushes out of brush
fences. 1
To Make. Your Stables Warm in Winter.?1
Sot them on lirer.
T& Drain La nth.?Drink whrstej-,"' aitid
spend all your timo at tho village tavern.
This will drain you. of all yotir lands in a anojrt
timo.
To Make Stone Fence*.?Equal parts of
whiskey and older, "this is the reciprocal stone
fence ; thfc m?te yfti* ray of it tf#e ?worc. it wiU
? Jay" you.

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